The Witch Twins
by Intergalactic Chocochip Cookie
Summary: Jane and Alec's story since Aro found them, and her eternal, strong love for her Master... They are not the monsters the world claims them to be.
1. The Lord's Justice

**Hellooo! Yeah, this is completely unusual. Yesterday I was trying to catch Katy Perry's California Gurls on the radio when bam!, an Alice-like vision. I saw it all so clearly... I couldn't resist the temptation of writing this. I wanted to wait a little longer to post it, but, ah, you know... Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**The Lord's Justice**

_Italy, 1516._

_Aro's POV_

All I can hear is the screaming. It seems every single person from this village is congregated in the main square tonight. The furious cries rise in the air.

"Witch, witch!" they roar. "Witch, witch, witch!"

A burning, again. Sometimes I leave my home in Volterra and wander around these villages, only for the fascinating spectacle that is the human being. This time they have gone beyond imagination. The clock says it is almost midnight, yet the place is anything but dark. It is as if the flames fly from the centre of the square to the clouds. The sky is bleeding tonight.

"Witch!"

"Burn her!"

"She sleeps with the devil!"

"Destroy her!"

"Creature from hell!"

"May God's law punish her for eternity!"

I had never witnessed such savagery before. True, there are more people burned here than in any other village of Italy, but the crowd had never punished anyone with this intensity. They are so eager, so bloodthirsty, that they prepared her burning stake before bringing her. Seen from here, the fire forms a semi-circle, the stake right in the middle. They will tie her and then close her hell.

Finally she arrives. The screams increase, louder and wilder now that what seems a dozen hooded priests drag a tiny, small creature, hooded as well. They unveil her. Her face, lit by the torches and her own pyre, is swollen and bruised; her loose, golden hair dirty with her own blood. By the shaking way she moves I see that she has been tortured; who knows what they did to her. But behind her wounds I see that she is extremely beautiful. Sweet, pure. This child just cannot be a witch. An angel, more likely. She looks down, too scared to face the multitude.

"Strega! Witch!"

"Demon!"

"May she rot in hell!"

"Burn her!"

"_Bruciarla_! Burn her!"

One of her torturers slaps her and pulls her by the hair so she looks up.

"Are you repentant now, witch?"

"Yes, yes," she says feebly.

"Kiss the cross and entrust yourself to the Lord."

She presses her lips to the golden object and I hear her whisper a quick prayer. They are about to throw her to the flames when a new mass of priests appears.

"We found the other one!" they announce.

They reveal the new victim. At the sight of him the girl loses all composure.

"No! Please! Not him! Please!" she implores, with the strenght found in her suffering.

"Shut up!" and they hit her again.

I focus on the newcomer. He is just as beautiful as the girl, and bears the same marks of torture. It is obvious that they are brother and sister, twins, perhaps. These are not devils, they are gods. And I can see that their unnatural beauty is what brought them their disgrace. In the last minutes of their lives they beg, they implore, they supplicate, not for themselves, but for each other.

"Please! Let him go! He's innocent!"

"Don't hurt her! Burn me, burn me, not her!"

"He's not the one you want!"

"She's got nothing to do with this!"

"Look at them," says the bishop. "They bear Satan's mark in their faces. Brother and sister, united in profane embrace."

"Monsters!"

"Ratti! Rats!"

"Only God can punish, only God can forgive. Only His love will redeem these sinners. May He have mercy on their souls. Burn them both!"

The crowd roars.

"No! Please!" begs the boy. "Jane! Jane!"

"Alec!" she sobs. "Alec, no!"

They tie them to the stake and the circle is closed.

God's Justice has been applied. As soon as the angels catch fire the crowd disperses. So much for their punishment, and they leave when the flames are just licking their way up. Humans. Only the priests remain, mixing their prayers with the angels' screams. But eventually they leave, too. It is then when I approach.

I find a hole in the ardent circle and reach them. I want to give them a proper burial, that is all. Of course, I will not bury them with the other mundane monsters that destroyed them, they deserve their own sanctuary. Therefore, I take them and carry them to a nearby garden. And just when I lay them on the grass the most miraculous thing occurs.

They held hands as they burned, and they are still together in this moment. But their intertwined fingers curl... now. They are alive! Alive, after everything that happened! They are alive! Such a wonder.

"Alec..." mumbles the girl.

"Jane..." he answers weakly. Their hold on each other becomes tighter.

Their clothes and bodies are charred, yet somehow their faces remain untouched. Their beauty is truly exquisite, beyond compare, and certainly something out of this world. I have never seen something like this. Ever. The opportunity is too precious to let it go; these angels have fought so hard for their lives that they deserve to keep them forever. With such strenght, such passion, I have no doubts these twins will have talents unheard of, they will be powerful beyond measure. They will be dazzling, the jewels of my collection.

I bite into their charred flesh. They barely seem to notice, they are in so much pain anyway. But after a while the girl, Jane, does feel the process.

"Not again," she says in a horrified whisper. "Not again, not again..."

I try to soothe her by caressing her flawless cheek and her bloody hair. I watch them until the sun starts to shine. Then I take them with me to Volterra, to paradise, where they will be able to start again, perfect immortals with a glorious eternity ahead of them. Their life begins now.


	2. Who Is Like The Lord

**Hello! Like it or not, here I am. I just HAVE to say this: the chapter's title is exactly what my name means. First time it comes of use.**

**Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Who Is Like The Lord**

With the first lights of the third day they wake up. Their bodies are small, they didn't take too long to change. I watched over them personally, and enjoyed the miracle of seeing their burned skin heal thanks to _my_ venom, of observing how they bloomed right in front of my eyes.

I called my brothers to inform them of these findings, and they, too, marveled at the exquisiteness of the creatures; Caius especially seems fascinated with them. They help me change the charred, humble clothes for new, elegant ones to match them. We don't add the cloaks, though, that must be a decision of the angels themselves. They will join us, anyway.

And so now they open their eyes. At the very same time, like good twins. They sit upright and look at each other.

"You're alive," they both whisper. They melt in a hug.

"I'm so sorry," says Jane. "Please, forgive me."

"It wasn't your fault, baby," answers Alec, stroking the golden hair I have already washed and detangled. "You forgive me."

Only then do they become aware of my presence. They get on their feet quickly, quickier than they expected themselves. Confusion clouds their faces as I walk toward them

"Where are we?" asks Alec. I'm about to answer him when his sister formulates a better question.

"_What_ are we?" she says, looking at her hands and breathing slowly. "Who are you? What are we doing here? Are we alive? And-"

"Wait, wait, wait, my darling," I start, reaching her in a second. She jumps at the speed. Every second I like her more. I cup her lovely face in my hands. "Too many questions. First of all, my name is Aro. Three days ago I watched as that crowd accused and burned you. I thought you were dead, and decided to bury you before they could mangle your bodies. Yet I discovered that you had survived. And I, of course, was not going to let you die, so I saved you and brought you here. Yo are in Volterra, in the turret of a fourteen-century castle. And yes, you are still alive."

"But... what are you? What are we?"

"We are all the same, Jane. We are vampires."

Brother and sister look at each other, contemplating their marble skin, their red eyes, their unbearable beauty. After a while Alec speaks.

"Vampires, then?"

"Yes. Not the ones people believes in, though. We are not affected by garlic, holy water, crosses, or sunlight. We are indestructible."

They smile, pleased. Suddenly, Jane's eyes cloud with fear.

"Are we safe here? Will they come back for us?"

"No, dear one. Now that you really are not humans, not that you truly belong to the supernatural world, they will not hurt you. They always punish the wrong person, because the real monsters know better than to let ourselves get caught. Even if they found you, you alone would be enough to take down the entire mob who hurt you."

Jane laughs, and the sound is all music, all magic. Even she is charmed by it. I then explain to them everything about our kind: our characteristics, our power, our beauty. Caius and Marcus join us, and they all seem pleased with each other. The twins are particularly pleased at the possibility of being talented.

"Do you relly think we could have powers?"

"Undoubtedly."

The clock tower sings it is nine in the morning. Jane walks to the window and breathes the cold air.

"And, do we... feed on humans?" she inquires.

"Yes," tells her Caius.

"Great," she smiles. However, this is not _her_ smile, not the godess-like, sublime, sweet smile she drew when she saw Alec alive, nor the one she had when she knew they would be safe forever. No, this is a cruel smile, soft but determined, with her eyes to match the rawness of her expression.

"Sister," starts Alec, "don't say that. We're all God's-"

"God!" she snorts. "What is God? God doesn't exist, Alec."

"Jane!"

"What? It's the truth. God is a lie. God is nothing but a childish illusion to justify all the suffering in the world. 'It's God's will'. 'It's God's law'. God is a pretext for humans to step on one another. They kill, they destroy, they hurt, all in God's name. And if he does exist," she continues, stopping her brother's attempt to interrupt her, "he's still a lie. Almighty? Merciful? Please. Where was God when all those people tortured us? Where was God when they burned us alive? I don't know about you, Alec, but I was hurt in every way possible. I was threatened, I was insulted. Beaten, drowned, burned. Two priests tried to rape me. They came to my cell and began touching me all over, while whispering disgusting things. A bishop stopped them, telling them it would be sleeping with the Devil himself. But even in his eyes I could see the lust.

"During every second of those tortures I begged God to save us. Do you think he ever appeared? Of course not. Why? Because he doesn't exist. God doesn't exist." She looks down to the tiny people on the Piazza dei Priori, going to mass. Then she looks at the white, smooth, cloud-covered sky. "Poor fools," she adds. Alec goes to stand behind her and hugs her softly.

"Why were you tried?" asks Caius suddenly.

"Incest," answers Alec. "Of course, a calumny. The truth is that they were afraid of our beauty. They'd been years trying to find an excuse to eliminate us."

"How old are you?" inquires Marcus.

"We'll turn seventeen in two weeks. We worked as recolectors in a vineyard. It was us who supported the family, our father being too lost in his gambles and alcohol. Almost every night he would beat our mother, and, to protect ourselves, Jane and I would curl on the bed and sleep in each other's arms. We didn't mean anything by it, we just wanted to comfort each other. But one morning a neighbour caught us and reported us. They never believed the story, but it provided them with a pretext to get rid of us. As I said, our beauty frightened them. But they knew we were innocent."

"Indeed we were," whispers Jane. "They very first thing they saw when they imprisoned us was that I was... intact. Pure. No man has ever... touched me. And they still continued the trial. There you have God."

She turns around and caresses her brother's cheek. Then she walks toward me. For the first time she's not altive, cold, or resentful. She is humble, and I get a glimpse of the tender, lovely girl she once was.

"God didn't save us, but _you_ did. We owe you for eternity. We could never do enough to thank you, but if there's anything you want or need, consider us yours."

I smile down at her. She is quite small; she can barely reach my still heart. I hold out my hand. She already knows about my powers, so she moves shyly to touch me. I can barely feel her hand, so fine, so delicate it is. Her thoughts, however, I do feel. She is the most extraordinary girl I have ever met. Her priority is her brother, and though she does not realize there is a very powerful link with him, both in heart and mind. She is wrapped in a cloud of pain and hatred, she now trusts no one but Alec and me. I feel the terror of her capture, the pain of the tortures, the revulsion when those men tried to corrupt her body. Yet she has the ability of loving to an extreme passion, beyond measure, and whoever can get her faithfulness has it forever. She would have made a wonderful wife and mother.

But most important of all, there it is: a strong talent, not yet developed, but powerful indeed. Alec must have one as well. I notice that Jane is watching me with worried eyes. I kiss her hand to soothe her.

"You do not owe me anything, my darling. Finding you and your brother is the best thing that has ever happened to me. If you really want to do something for me, then stay. Join us."

"Really?"

"Can we join you?"

The twins' eyes sparkle; this is what they were hoping for.

"Of course! We would be delighted. I have just seen it in your mind, there is a talent. I am sure there is one in you, too, Alec. It would be such a waste not to develop those abilities fully. We will help you here, nothing would please us more than having you in our family. With your beauty and talents you will be the joy of the castle. Welcome."

They hug, absolutely happy. Then Jane speaks again.

"Thank you so much... Master." she smiles. Why, no one had ever called me that before. Sounds nice. "And, um, well, I know I am taking a liberty, but if it's not too much to ask, I beg you to help us to do something.

"Whatever you wish, Jane. What is it that you want?"

Her sweet smile becomes hard again. She says the word slowly, savouring every letter. "Revenge."

**Hello again! Just to make this clear, I do not share Jane's opinion, though I agree with a couple of her ideas. You must understand she's very hurt, sad, and angry. Please.**


	3. Revenge

**I know, I know, I took too long. But I was stuck on a paragraph and it was a while until i could get it right. Would you forgive me and review?**

**Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Revenge**

Jane and Alec dress almost identically: a long cloak, almost as white as their skin. The only difference is that Alec's resembles a soutane, while Jane's is a little tight-fitted and the collar is made of lace. He does her hair, loose all over her back and with small white flowers intertwined. The only touches of colour are their hairs, blond and jet black, and their crimson eyes. They are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, they are visions, they are gods.

"We are ready," they announce.

We are a small group, my two brothers, the twins, and myself. It is almost midnight when we gather in the garden

"What are your plans?" asks Caius.

"We are not sure," says Alec. "But we want to make them feel exactly what we felt, bit by bit."

"You mean you will burn them?"

"It's a possibility. But we want to do something before. We haven't decided, but it will definitely be something excruciating."

"One thing we do agree on," intervenes Jane. "We will not feed on them. They don't deserve it, and the idea of having their blood in our veins is plainly repulsive. But we will probably make them watch as we feed on their children. We would really like that."

Interesting, how they never speak as individuals, but as a whole. It is always 'we are', 'we think', 'we want'. So united, so together, so powerful. Powerful. They add a couple more ideas and soon we set off running to the twins' revenge.

_Jane's POV_

The exhilaration I feel from running can barely compare to the exhilaration our plans give me. As I run I hold my brother's hand, and I couldn't be happier. We will destroy them all, the real rats, the real monsters. We will start in order, saving the neighbour who accused us, the people who tortured us, the two priests who tried to force me, and the bishop who sentenced us, for last. This is something we will greatly enjoy.

With this new, wonderful vampire speed, it doesn't take us long to arrive to the village. For a while I can't move. I didn't expect to get so emotional. I can tell Alec feels the same way. But we're invincible now. After a long look at the main square we form the final plan.

"Caius and Marcus will assemble the Special People in the church. They're mostly priests, so there shouldn't be any problem. Meanwhile Aro, Alec, and I will hunt down the rest."

They all agree. It makes me feel so... I don't know, touched, that though they have no obligations with us, though they are absolutely superior to us, though we're nothing compared to them, they care for us and are willing to help us to do this. They owe us nothing, and we owe them all, yet here they are. It's beautiful.

Identifying our attackers isn't difficult; the whole village was there to watch us burn. Therefore, we just knock at the first door we find. It's the butcher's house. Good start.

"Hello," greets Aro politely. The sleepy woman in front of him looks totally dazed by him. Alec and I, hidden behind our Master, exchange a smile. "We are so sorry to awake you at so early an hour, but this is a matter of extreme importance."

The butcher appears, two children with him. At first he seems annoyed, but then he notices Aro's fine clothes and beauty, and, mistaking him for some lord, bows his head most respectfully.

"Welcome, sir. It is no trouble at all. We're honoured to have you here. How can we help you? "

"My... children would like to speak to you. I understand you know them."

Confusion clouds the man's face. "I... sir, I'm afraid I don't, but if there's anything I could do..."

"Oh, I'm sure you do know them. Look at them; maybe it will refresh your memory."

Aro moves, allowing us to come into the house. When the family sees us a thousand emotions play on their faces, from dazzling when they first look at us, to pure terror when they actually recognize us.

"It's... it's..."

"Yes. It's us." And we smile.

They're paralysed by fear. The children cower behind their mother, every face white and distorted by horror.

"Why so scared?" asks Alec. "You looked more enthusiastic three days ago. Or was it four? Anyway, when you walked down the street, crying out that we were rats and monsters, rejoicing as we burned alive. Then you didn't look scared at all, did you?"

"Wh-what do you want? What are you looking for?"

"What do you think?" I say. "What would you be looking for in the house of someone who cheered your death? Of someone who, though aware of your innocence, had no trouble in claiming for your sins to be punished? It's very, very simple. We want revenge."

Aro puts his hands on our shoulders. "These twins you condemned were purer than anything in the world. Clean. But you turned them into something else. I found them and gave them what they needed to get their justice. You called them witches, demons. They were humans. Look at them now –their skin, their eyes. Look at the beauty you were afraid of, it's now impossibly greater. Do you have a name for them now?"

Silence. Utter silence.

"I am asking you! Do you have a name for them now?"

And then I feel it. An amazing rush, better than adrenaline. A powerful current of energy exploding from my very soul to my fingertips. I can almost feel my heart beating again. Next thing I know, the butcher's on the floor, writhing and twisting with agony clear on his face. With each of his screams the energy inside me increases, it's a pleasant caress, a tickling all over my body. Can I control it? Oh, yes, I can. I can make him suffer all I want. Soon he's begging for mercy. Am I kind enough? Yes. Well, actually now I want to see how long his wife can stand my new little game. Not so long, it seems, because she's almost immediately imploring. I finally stop, satisfied. I've seen what I wanted –their figures broken, humiliated, humble before us.

When I'm myself again I turn to my Alec, who smiles at me in wonder. Then I look at Aro, who I find watching me with the utmost fascination. The tickling I feel has nothing to do with my new talent.

Oh, ok. The butcher. He and his wife are on the floor, spent after what I did to them, whatever it is that I did. Good. I look at their terrified children and almost feel pity for them. Almost. But Alec continues with our plan. He approaches the children, who are too scared to run from him.

"You do not have anything to fear now," he tells them. "You won't suffer anymore."

He takes the girl, a small child of about nine. He pulls her softly to him and bites onto her neck. She doesn't say a word, just grows paler and paler. Only now her parents do something besides lying on the floor. They jump at my brother to stop him, or, better said, try to, because Aro stops them. With only one hand he immobilizes them both and no matter how hard they shake, they are no match for him. I take a moment to enjoy their wordless horror before joining Alec and taking the boy for myself.

I'd never drunk human blood before. I didn't have time between Volterra and coming here, and I obviously never did something like that while being a mortal. This blood tastes very sweet, and it's warm, and it's now that I realize how desperately thirsty I was. I had felt the dryness in my throat, but I hadn't given it importance under the light of my plans, so I'm glad the fullness of it hits when I'm ready to quench it. The liquid is hot and soft, and though I try to stay concentrated on my plans, and my brother, and my Master, soon I give up and think only of drinking and drinking. Drinking, drinking, drinking.

Sooner than I'd like the boy is completely drained. I drop his lifeless body onto the floor. Alec, already done with his child, is now kneeling beside me and strokes my hair while I recover from the experience. Then we turn to Aro and the couple.

"So? What do you think now?"

"V-va-vampires," chokes out the man. "Vampires."

"Very good, old man, very good indeed. Well, I guess we're done here. So, on to the next step."

There are no words to describe what their expressions are when they see us lit the matches. They are so shocked, so utterly scared they can't even beg us for mercy. The materials inside their house don't need too much to quickly catch the fire. We step outside, take a couple of minutes to enjoy their screams, and then go on with our plan. This house was located almost on the outskirts, so I don't think anyone heard their cries. They will soon notice the fire, though, and so we need to hurry.

And when they do notice the flames, ah, it's wonderful. We visit a few more houses, more or less with the same system as the first one. It's amazing, the way parents implore us to take them instead of their children, and how the little ones beg us not to hurt their papas or their mamas. We listen to no one but our Master, who sometimes touches these people and tells us if they deserve to go through my newly found talent or if we just burn them, or if they require another kind of punishment. In one of these visits we discover Alec's powers. We don't have enough time, nor enough thirst, to feed on all the children of the village, so some of them must perish the same way as their parents. But my brother, who's always had a soft spot for kids, find this unfair, since most of the children weren't even present at our burning, and if they were, they went dragged by their families. In trying to find a way to minimize the suffering he produces an, I don't know, wave? cloud? of something that kind of blocks their senses. All of a sudden, they stop screaming and crying, their little eyes seem lost. They don't even make a sound when the flames devour them.

Aro looks at us as if we were the best things he's ever seen. His eyes shine in a way that makes clear he isn't human, a gaze beyond fascination, wonder, and surprise.

"Look at the sky," he tells us. "It is exactly the same as four nights ago, when you were the victims."

"Nice, that the roles have changed," I can't help saying.

He laughs. "Ah, Jane, Jane, Jane. You and I will conquer the whole world."

We look around, trying to see if there's any house we haven't visited. Those we find empty, because some people have run to the various chapels and even the graveyard, seeking protection in their inexistent God. Well, better for us, we only need to set fire to a couple of places and we bring the entire village to smithereens. Of course, we let them see us before we burn them, just so they know why they're being punished, to show them that they weren't a match for us, and, well, yes, to have our fun watching their terrified, pathetic faces. Then we stand on the main square, the very place where we were burned and that still bears the marks of our condemn. The whole village is on fire, and not a voice can be heard now. It is then when Caius and Marcus reappear.

"All your people are nicely gathered in the big church. It was so easy to lure them there, they think that God is punishing the place and that the only way of saving themselves is by going to His house and beg for His forgiveness. You will find them immersed in their prayers."

We go there as fast as we can. The doors of the church are closed beyond any human power. It only takes a soft push from Marcus's hand for them to give in. Just like Caius said, the rats are so obsessed with their holy whispers they don't notice our arrival. We watch their empty devotion for a while before we let them see us. Their horror could not be clearer, some pray even more frantically, others cross themselves, others cry out, one even tries to sprinkle us with holy water. Poor fools. One by one, slowly and delicately, they go under my powers. Alec, desperate for something to do himself, shatters a statue of the Virgin Mary and uses the pieces to hurt them. We know the physical torture we inflict on them is nothing compared to the mental torture they put themselves into, but we still enjoy seeing the wounds in their bodies.

"You!" I address a priest. "You beat me up one day, and flogged me the next one. Did you like it, did you enjoy seeing me cry in pain and beg for mercy? Did you?"

"And you," continues Alec, talking to another man. "You submerged me in boiling water to clean me from the sin of having slept with my sister. Do you know how that feels? Well, now you can find out."

The man howls when the water splashes on him. Where on Earth did Alec find boiling water? Good one.

Four of these people have already died from pain and terror. Luckily, my favourite ones are still here for me to play.

"Oh, you two. Didn't you come to my cell one night and tried to slip your holy fingers under my dress? Yes, you did. One of you held my arms and the other sought pleasure in the witch's body. The bishop stopped you, you would not like to touch the devil, would you? Ah, but you definitely would. Now it's my turn to touch the devil."

I focus my mind on them for what seems hours. I couldn't be more pleased, watching them twist and squirm thanks to me. But I'm forced to stop, we don't want our sacred people to go before they feel the fullness of our revenge. We use the very same fire from the candles lit for the saints to create the blazing home they deserve.

Back at home, I sob tearlessly in Alec's arms for endless time. He cries with me, too. The dry weeping seems to wash away everything that was once us, Alec-human and Jane-human, the recolectors, the children from the vineyard. What we thought we were has been taken away forever, and once we're done crying two new people hug each other and go to see their Master.

"Master," I start. "We want to thank you for what you have done for us. Without you, we would have never been able to make them pay for what they did to us. But, in a way, I'm glad it happened. Without all that, we would have never come here, to this new, better life; we would have never met you."

"We could never express our gratitude," continues Alec. "You, all three of you, have been kinder to us than anyone else, ever. Yesterday you offered us a place here, with you, in your guard. If that offer is still on, we would like to accept it. We promise you, you will never find more loyal, more dedicated servants than us."

Aro and his brothers smile at us.

"My children," he says, "we know that. Of course the offer is still on. We would be delighted to count you among our family. You have showed courage, love, and determination. With your talents, you will go far beyond anyone else ever. Welcome."

A tall man, I think his name is Felix, hands him something black. Two cloaks, velvet black as charcoal, impossibly soft and obviously the finest. The vampires in the hall gasp quietly; for what we have heard black is worn only by those of the highest rank. We feel so honoured we cannot even talk. Aro puts the cloaks on our shoulders and kisses our foreheads.

"Now you are part of us."


	4. The Traveler

**The Traveler**

We began an intensive training under Aro's supervision. Fighting, running, hunting, hiding, we were taught everything. Aro, Caius and Marcus were wonderful teachers, what with all their centuries of experience; under their guidance we knew we were becoming much more than vampires. There was, also, of course, the question of our talents. Our Master took care of that personally, making sure we stretched them to their limit. He would often take us to the towns or even cities, pick a random someone and tell us to practice on that person. At first I found the task disturbing, what with the screams and howls of agony, but if I ever hesitated before my victim Aro would remind me of what humans meant to us, how badly they had hurt us and then any doubt would disappear. Soon I learned to enjoy the process and began to look forward to our little outings.

It didn't take us long to reach a high rank among the Volturi. We had talents and brains, we learned fast, and we wanted nothing more than to please Aro. Even when we weren't officially training, Alec and I would practice. Almost every night we went to the towns and cities near our beloved Volterra, like Pisa or St. Giminiano to sharpen our senses and skills at hunting and killing. Much to my happiness, my Master did seem satisfied with our progress. He would often kiss my forehead or stroke my cheek and say what a joy I was to him. I'd taken the habit of sitting at his feet and laying my head on his lap while he discussed the government matters with his brothers and the guard. It was there, as he stroked my hair -hair that was always arranged in a pretty chignon Alec was an expert at-, that I learned the secrets of vampire politics and strategy. I learned the schemes, plans and elemental organization, and I must admit I loved that more than the physical immunity and even my beauty; I dreamed of the day I could help Aro and he would see my potential as more than a first-class torturer.

One night I went out to the fields to hunt. For the first time in months I was alone; Alec had decided to explore a new town and I'd preferred not to go with him because, well, because it was too close to our hometown, to the vineyards where we'd been chased and burned. I therefore wandered on my own that night, killing a lonely traveler here and there, or torturing some man who had left his wine and friends too late –his family would be better without him. I killed without drinking, just out of boredom, snapping necks in a millisecond and throwing the bodies to the river, only to realize I was more bored than before and start the whole thing again.

Finally, something interesting happened. I saw a small caravan of merchants approaching, and since by then I had gotten thirsty, I decided to attack and kill them all, taking the blood this time. I could smell a couple of good ones, and who knew, maybe they carried not only olive oil, but also some pretty jewel I could add to my collection. I got on the first carriage. Most of the men, at the sight of my beauty, mistook me for an angel and gave in easily, but some others realized I actually belonged to the evil kind of beings and fought for their lives. However, little could holy water, the Bible and prayers do against me. Soon they had all become nothing but corpses. Or so I thought. Because right when I was about to leave I heard the faintest of heartbeats and I found him.

He was a young man, not too strong but certainly brave and determined to survive. From what I could see he had wounded his leg in an attempt to escape and was now lying on the grass with the grimace of pain clearly painted on his face. But though he knew that he was weak, that I wasn't human and that he had no chances of winning he tried to fight me off. Just for the fun of it, I kept it going for a while, amazed at how he endured my talent in silence, until at last he spoke.

"Don't kill me," he said. "Please." Though he was panting, his voice was clear and steady. He made me curious.

"Oh, and why can't I kill you, uh? Give me one reason why I should have mercy." I said as I gave him another taste of my talent.

"I could be useful to you," he gasped out.

"You? To me? How could _you_ be of use to _me_?" I snickered at the idea.

"I'm resistant. I can do anything you want me to do. No one needs me and no one would miss me. I could dedicate my whole life to please you. Think about it, girl, it's a good deal. Whatever you are, make me one too and I swear I'll be your man for eternity."

"Eternity?" I said. "That's quite a long time, traveler. Are you sure you can live through it?"

"Yes."

"You truly have no idea of what you're saying. Your words have meanings you can't even begin to understand. Do you know what I am?"

"You're either an angel or the Devil himself. Or I guess, herself. But you sure are pretty. I wouldn't mind pleasing you in every whim and desire you have."

"Ha! As if I would ever look twice at you, traveler. But listen, boy, I'm serious. I'm not alone, and if you say you will join us for eternity, it _really_ means eternity. If I take you to my home you will only have two options: forget everything you have been until now and stay with us, loyal forever, or die. You would die a painful death, where my powers," I gave him another little round, "would be a tickling in comparison. It is a tough decision, traveler. Are you sure you want to continue?"

He looked into my eyes and answered without hesitation. "Yes. I do."

I examined him. He wasn't bad-looking at all, tall and muscular, and I could see that most of his strength didn't only lie in his body. There was a spark in his eyes that I actually liked; a flash of determination and potential power. Maybe I could show him to my Master and let Him make the decision. I sighed and lifted the traveler off the ground, throwing him over my shoulder.

"God!" he exclaimed. "You really are strong, you know."

I didn't answer, because I was too focused on ignoring the instincts that drew me to the wound in his leg, that urged me to drink the warm blood I cold now feel dripping onto my hand. I began to run towards the castle and he spoke again.

"Are you _flying_, girl? Holy God!"

This time I _had_ to answer. "You mention your God again and I'll finish you off without a spare glance. God doesn't exist."

When I got home, I walked directly to my Master's throne and bowed my head. He smiled at me.

"What have you got there, Janette, dear?"

"Someone who I think has potential. He could be one of us. At least, I tortured him for quite a long time and he never said a word. Then he asked me to bring him here."

"Ah, that is a first. You have acted well in bringing him, my darling. Let's ask him a couple of things and we will then decide. But first come here, with me."

I dropped the traveler on the floor and he fell with a heavy sound and a grunt. While he breathed I took my spot at my Master's feet.

"What is your name?" asked Aro.

"Demetri," answered the man.

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-five."

"Where are you from?"

"Arezzo."

"Do you have any family?"

"No. My mother just died. That's why I decided to join the caravan, to see the world now that I didn't have anything or anyone to tie me to my hometown."

My Master stood up and took Demetri's face in his hands. He was looking both into his eyes and into his mind, but it didn't take him long. Soon he joined Caius and Marcus to discuss the boy's future.

"What the hell was that?" Demetri asked me.

"I'll explain later."

"Why not now?"

"There's no point in telling you if they decide to kill you. It would be a waste of secrets."

"Oh, come on, Janette."

"My name is Jane."

"But-"

"Shut up."

"Jane, I-"

"Shut. Up!"

Finally, Aro, Marcus and Caius turned to us again. I knew my Master well enough to know that look of resolution in his eyes. Demetri would stay.

"Well, Demetri," started Caius. "We have discussed your situation and, since my brother says you have potential, we have decided to keep you. Welcome to the Volturi house."

Demetri looked at me, but my attention was focused on Aro. It seemed he was evaluating me, as if trying to decide if I could do something. When he told me, I could hardly believe my ears.

"Jane, sweetheart," he asked with the sweetest of voices, "would you like to do it?"

I froze. "Wh- what? What do you mean, Master?"

"Would you like to be the one to change young Demetri?"

"Master, I … I've never… I couldn't, I wouldn't know what to do."

"There is a first time for everything, Jane. Come on, do it. I _want_ you to do it. I will help you. Be brave, honey, it can't be much worse than anything else you've done and been through."

I looked at Demetri, Demetri looked at me, we looked at Aro, Aro looked at us. Finally, I got on my feet and walked towards the man lying before me. My Master was right behind me, and his presence gave me the courage I needed. I knelt before Demetri and tried to accommodate myself. I sought advice in my Master and he began instructing me.

"This way you will feel more comfortable. No, not like that, it lacks dignity. There, much better. With style."

He put his arms around me and leaned down. He was practically over me as he guided my body, and I could feel his chest pressed against my back. Would he notice it if I threw my shoulders back to feel a little more of him? Would he notice if when he took my hands to show me how to hold the person down and leave the neck exposed I intertwined my fingers with his, ever so slightly? If he did, he never showed it.

I bit into Demetri's neck. He gasped softly when I cut through his skin.

"So it was this, then."

"It _is_ this."

This time I couldn't feel the relief human blood usually gave me because my drinking was controlled. I had to make sure I didn't kill him or drain him too much, which wasn't easy because he did taste good. I kept sucking until Aro stopped me.

"That is enough. It will not take long to start."

Just as he said, less than a minute later Demetri was twitching and whimpering on the floor. Aro got on his feet and helped me up. He smiled and touched the corner of my lips, wiping a tiny drop of blood.

"Well done, Jane," he said in his velvety voice. "Very well done. I am so proud of you…"

"Really, Master? Do you really mean that?"

"Of course. You and your brother have proven to be the best members of this house. You were born for this life, both of you. It is so sad that to become vampires we have to be human first," he sighed. "Now, there is something I would like to tell you, but I need your brother, too. Oh, look! Here he is."

Alec was quickly informed of Demetri and other events. He hugged me when he heard that I'd been able to do a whole transformation and asked if he could do the next one, to which everyone agreed.

"Well, this is what I wanted to tell you," continued Aro. "Tell me, how long have you been here with us?"

"Almost five years, Master," answered Alec.

"Already? Incredible. In that case, I think you are more than prepared to take this step. Jane, Alec, my brothers and I would like you to join us as the Main Council."

"What do you mean by that, Master?"

"I mean that you will not be just members of the guard anymore. You will have as much influence and authority as the three of us and your orders must be obeyed with the same efficiency as ours. You will be like… our children, perhaps? You will be able to take part in the decisions and rule with us. So, what do you think? Will you accept this offer?"

It took all of my willpower not to fall on my knees before him. This was what I'd wanted the most, all this time, but that I'd hidden from him so he wouldn't think I was an ambitious, power-starved creature. Still, of course he saw it and was making my wish true, he was giving me the feeling of belonging I'd craved my entire life, human and vampire. I knew I shared that need with my brother, and I also knew we would work even harder than before, with devotion and dedication for the man who not only had given us a life, but also a home.

But then I was scared again. For, if he had seen that deepest of corners inside my mind and had found that ambition, had he already found himself inside my heart?


	5. Charlotte

**Charlotte**

_Alec's POV_

"Jaaaaaneeee! Jaaaaanneeeee!"

I ran at top speed up and down the castle, but she seemed to have vanished. I kept calling her, moving so fast and so carelessly that I tripped over Caius's feet.

"Alec!"

"Sorry, sir!" I called over my shoulder, without slowing down a little bit.

"Heavens, boy! Dignity!"

"Sorry, sir! Jaaaaneee!"

Finally, I found my sister watering orchids in the vast lawns of the castle. In the distance I heard the clock from the Palazzo dei Priori singing two in the morning. I had always found it strange that she chose such a peculiar moment to tend to the garden, but when I asked her she said she liked to see the flowers sleep, since it was something she missed from her own human life. When she saw me coming she laughed.

"What is this riot about, Alec?" she cut a flower and put it behind my ear.

"My darling sister!" I cried, taking her around and spinning her around in my arms. "You will never guess this." I made a pause for dramatic effects. "Aro has given us our first commission outside Volterra."

"What!" she exclaimed, her face lit up and angel-like.

"And that isn't the best part: we are to lead the group. Both of us, in charge of the whole party _and_ the mission!"

Jane dropped the orchids she had in her hands and hugged me. It had taken us a decade to earn this, ten years of hard work and learning, of proving Aro we were capable of leading and taking control. The taste of this reward was the sweetest. A couple of hours later we were summoned again so the three Volturi could explain the problem to us.

It seemed fairly easy: the classic vampire who was risking exposure. Apparently, a coven in the north of France had a newborn, a particularly problematic one, whose behavior was putting our entire kind in jeopardy. Already we could hear rumors among the humans, whispers about a certain creature that belonged to the supernatural world. With a group of five -Felix, Georgette, Marya, Renata and Santiago, plus ourselves- it was our mission to visit this coven, refresh their minds and, should the newborn be too wild or rebellious, destroy him. We had seen how it was done a thousand times, during the trials in the castle, and therefore we were confident. We left for France that day at nightfall.

_Jane's POV_

We were incredibly excited. To know we were now important enough to lead a mission made us feel more than proud, and we wore the weight of the responsibility like a crown. Ah, but, of course, _he _had to be there to ruin the moment.

"Hey, Janie," called Demetri while I darted here and there. "I heard you are going on a mission. Big girl now, huh?"

There wasn't a day when I did not regret having saved Demetri. He was the most annoying person ever, and would not waste any chance he got to play a joke on me; sometimes he even invented that chance. Since I'd forbidden him to call me Janette -that was a nickname only my Master and my Brother could use- he'd taken Janie instead and it was a thousand times more irritating.

"Go away, Demetri. Do you not see I'm busy?"

"Aw, Jane, you are always too serious. Such a pretty child… Come on, a smile. Think of me; that will work like magic."

I turned around and glared at him, only to find his amused grin. I felt the urge to say a very, very bad word, but since I'd never learned any, I contented myself with a low growl and a sigh of exasperation before continuing my way.

My expectations for the trip, though, managed to cheer me up again. We'd never been outside the castle except to hunt, but those who had been _inside_ the castle had spread our fame and we already had a reputation of infallible law keepers. _This is why He trusted us with this mission_, I kept thinking._ He knows we can do it. We will do it._

France has always been a beautiful country. That was my first visit ever, in 1526, and I daresay the land was even more charming back then. I saw the little villages and the peasants and remembered my own old life. Alec's gentle squeeze of my hand told me our thoughts were, as always, synchronized.

We waited until nightfall to follow the hints we had about this conflictive coven. They lived in a manor, forgotten on the outskirts of a town, and believed to be haunted. Quite a large number of vampires lived there: five, something unusual even in those times. One of them saw us and ran immediately to the house.

"Martina," we heard him say, "they've come."

Before anyone could react, we were inside the manor. Following the vampire manners, they bowed their heads at the sight of us, all but a redhead woman, who stood in a corner with her back to us. It seemed she was protecting something from us. Poor fool. I could smell their terror, hers in particular, and it pleased me greatly.

"So," began Alec. "We have heard some rumors. Rumors concerning a creation of yours."

"Let us explain," said a man, the one who had first seen us and who seemed to be the leader. "We… we do have a new member. We admit that she's wild with youth, and we deeply regret the damages she has caused, but we are fairly sure we can educate her soon."

"It's a bit late for that," I intervened. "The destruction left by your newborn is far too serious to ignore. This will have to be severely punished. Given what she has done I think she can't be allowed to live."

A soft whimper came from the woman in the corner, who I assumed was that newborn. She was trembling, and I almost felt pity for her. Almost.

"Please, accept our apologies," begged a woman, the leader's mate. "She won't be a trouble anymore, we promise."

"Oh, of course she won't," whispered Felix.

"We'll talk to the newborn, see if she's really capable of self-control. You there," Alec addressed the strange woman. "Come here."

She didn't move, only trembled more intensely.

"Come here! You, then, bring this deaf newborn of yours here."

No one moved and we began to feel suspicious. I decided to exercise a little pressure and soon one of their blond girls was writhing and screaming on the floor. It did not take them long to realize I was the cause of her suffering, and finally the leader's mate approached the redhead and whispered soothingly to her until she had a small bundle in her arms. Then she turned around and came toward us.

She handed me the bundle, which turned out to be a child. The moment I took it, the redhead woman began to sob. What I held in my arms was a beautiful baby girl, a toddler, awake but with her eyes closed, dressed in a charming pink dress with flowers and lace and even a little hood. She was the loveliest thing I had ever seen, and I couldn't help feeling something deep inside me, the instinct I'd once had as a human girl of protecting this baby. A soft coo went through my lips and the girl laughed. Then, she opened her eyes.

My terror was such that I dropped her. Alec caught her just in time, but when he looked at her he was just as horrified. Framed by her adorable blond curls was a pair of piercing, ruby-red eyes. I could see it all now: the paleness, the beauty, the sweet smell I'd mistaken for baby aroma. This wasn't a toddler. This was a newborn vampire. This was the creature whose killings had attracted the attention of the people of the town.

"_What have you done!_" I hissed as soon as I could talk again.

"Please, understand," begged the redhead, speaking for the first time. "Do you have any idea what it is like, to see your baby d- die in your arms and not be able to do _anything_? To- to become… this, and lose all hopes of being a mother again?"

"What does any of that have to do with the monstrosity you've done!"

"She… she looks so much like my Charlotte… I couldn't help myself, she is _her_, my little lost girl. She's mine. Please."

"What you've done has no possible forgiveness," hissed my brother. "You will all pay dearly for this, that I can assure you. But you will all be taken with us to Volterra, along with your creation. Only Aro can deal with this horror."

"Take me if you want," cried the woman, "but leave Charlotte out of this. She isn't even aware of this! She's innocent! Do anything you want to me, but let my baby be. Please, I implore you"

"Everyone must come. That includes the aberration you have created, and she will pay just as much as you will."

"Please! I'll do anything!"

"Everyone. Renata, would you mind taking… Charlotte?" Alec snorted when he said her name."

"At least let her stay with me. She must be so scared…"

Felix slapped the woman across the face and the entire coven was arrested.

We returned to Volterra with our prisoners, who were too scared and too sure of their destiny that they didn't even try to escape. The only sound during the whole way was that of the child, who often cried in thirst. I was too disturbed by her existence to approach her, but Alec decided to keep her fed, I don't know it out of kindness or to stop her crying. Whatever the reason was, I grew sadder and sadder each time I saw that little thing sucking blood, a red drop running down her chin.

Why her? Such a small being, someone who had just started to live. It wasn't fair, not at all. Even though most of us didn't have a choice in this we were content with the life we led, I'd never heard a single complaint and in my personal case I regarded vampire existence as the greatest blessing that had ever come to me after my brother was born. We hadn't had a choice, but we did have the chance to get used to it and to enjoy it. But this baby? How did she feel about her nature? Was she aware of the change she'd been through? Just to think of the pain… transformation was an excruciating process for a grown person, now, for a child… I shuddered just by thinking of it.

When we arrived to the castle I was just as clueless as the prisoner coven. I had no idea of how Aro would react to these news and wondered if he would be angry, interested or curious. I knew him well enough to expect him to be even pleased at this new option; perhaps he would see the girl as a new kind of weapon. When we walked into the Hall I felt the softest tickling of fear.

"Jane, my darling!" cried Aro as soon as he saw me. "What a pleasure to see you have come home!"

I approached him and bowed. He kissed the top of my head. "Why, Jane, I find you rather distressed. What is the matter? Did you have any problems during the mission?"

"Master…" I began, and it took me a minute to continue. "We did find the coven and were also successful in finding the cause of all the trouble. Yet…" I stopped again. "It is much more serious than we thought. It… it- it is monstrous," I finally said.

Aro took my hand and held it for a long time. Once he had Seen his face looked more serious than I'd ever seen it.

"Bring them in, Felix," he commanded while he gestured for me to sit at his feet. Alec stood behind me.

"Brother, what is going on?" asked Caius.

"They are back," whispered Aro.

"Who?" inquired Marcus, but in that moment the coven entered the Hall, the girl and her creator at the centre of their group.

"Impossible!" exclaimed Marcus.

"An aberration," hissed Caius.

They were outraged, but not surprised. Apparently this had happened before, and that idea froze my blood. How many children had been sacrificed out of selfishness? I couldn't begin to imagine this little girl actually _killing_ people and there had been more like her?

Aro sensed my discomfort and patted my head lightly. Meanwhile, the prisoners were on one knee -again, the manners. The presence of the Volturi themselves required the bended knee instead of a simple bow-, the baby having been snatched from her creator's arms by Renata. Aro claimed her and Caiur and Marcus rose from their thrones to have a closer look. Much to my confusion and anger, while they examined her I became able to see beyond the terrifying first impression and could now admire the child's beauty. She was certainly the most charming and beautiful being I had never met, and the helplessness of her little eyes as she whimpered and tried to find her 'mother' was heartbreaking. She was _a baby, _for crying out loud!

"Brothers," said Aro quietly, "have you decided?"

"I have always been consistent about this," began Caius. "Such creations are not in any way justified. To do that to such a young human is beyond cruel, not to mention irresponsible and dangerous. This girl and the fool who changed her must perish."

"Marcus?"

"I agree with our brother. I will never see what can possibly drive a vampire to do something like this. It is absolutely selfish and almost sadistic. This is as risky as monstrous and should be destroyed. It will become an example for others."

"All right. And the rest of the coven?"

"Guilty by association. They kept the secret and deserve the same punishment."

My Master looked at his brothers, then at Charlotte and sighed.

"Poor little creature. She does think like a normal baby. She is completely innocent. Still, she's as guiltless as dangerous. Her undeveloped nature makes her obey no reason, only her own instincts. She will never be able to control her thirst; if she wants to feed, she will, no matter what. We cannot afford that risk. Therefore, she will have to pay for the crime that is not hers. We will all mourn for this. The entire coven must be executed right away."

A piercing cry broke in the air. The most painful of sounds, that of a broken heart. We knew she suffered only for the daughter she was about to lose yet again. In a last merciful act, they were allowed to die together. The vampires who served as executors started with the other members of the coven, quickly dismembering and burning bodies. This process, strangely enough, comforted me; at last I was seeing something I was used to, something that was almost a routine and that fitted in this immortal world. The smell of incense from the charring pieces was soothing. When the time came for Charlotte and her creator to die, Alec held my hand behind Aro's throne; a faint numbness told me that he was using his powers on the little girl so she wouldn't suffer the pain of burning again. However, he was not as kind to the woman, and though I discreetly hid my face in my Master's velvet cloak I heard the howl of agony until the scent of incense melted into ashes.


	6. Drops of Sun

**Drops of Sun**

Later that night, my Master took me to the huge lawns for a walk.

"I know that what you saw today was most shocking to you," he said, "and I also know you are confused. You were horrified by little Charlotte, but you cannot comprehend why we reacted like that, why our law was so strictly applied to someone who was barely more than a baby. What is more, you wonder how there was a secret about this world that I had not told you.

"This is a millenary story, placated but never quite extinguished. No one knows for sure how these children began, or what the first reason for their creation was, because the first vampire who ever did such a thing killed himself before we could interrogate him, and there was no one else to declare in his place. Thus, the cause will never be known.

"Do not think we didn't try to keep the children alive at first. You saw that little girl, wasn't she beautiful? They can conquer you in no time, so charming, soft, defenceless. You have but to be near them to adore them. My brothers and I were hopeful that with a little time we would be able to educate them, just like any other newborn, and would then have the opportunity to live with such fantastic creatures. Sadly, we did not succeed. We tried once, twice, even a third time –yes, Jane, there were that many- we provided the best training we could for the children, but it was seen that there was no point. You see, just like our bodies are frozen however they were when we became vampires, so are they minds: they will never go higher than their original baby thinking. That makes them whimsical and uncontrollable, impossible to teach. I don't know if you have ever looked after a human child, maybe when you were human yourself; then you know that their tantrums are epic. Imagine that and add it to the bloodlust."

"It was a massacre."

"That and more. It got too close to real exposure. Actually, one coven _was_ detected and annihilated by humans thanks to their child. After that incident, we knew we just couldn't allow those beings to exist. With all the pain of our hearts, we began to hunt the immortal children."

"Immortal children? Is that their official name?"

"Yes. It was Caius's idea. And the hunt became so much more than that… The immortal children were so worshipped by their creators and covens that they were not given up without a fight. Everyone fought to death to protect them, but they lost. Then a net of betrayal was built, because when one child was detected, anyone who knew about it and did not report that was also executed, like Caius said, guilty by association. That caused many vampires to tell on centuries-long friends, so their lives would be spared. Terrible fights, wars between clans, deathly enmities where there had only been friendship… such a catastrophe had never seen before. When, finally, we managed to control the situation again, too much had been lost: lives, lots of lives, human and vampire; trust, faith, all the good feelings were cut away and the scars they left still have not healed."

"I… I never… I never imagined it was like that… it's just that I cannot conceive how anyone could do this to a baby… Do not get me wrong, Master, you better than anyone know how much I love what I am, how proud I feel of belonging here, to this place, to this life. I have always known I was born to be a vampire. But those children…"

"I understand how you feel, cara mia, I once felt the same way. But with time you learn to see what is better for your life and your nature. Though the best path is almost always the most painful, the moment will come when you find the strength to follow it. In this case, we learned the hard way, by seeing our beloved ones perish for nothing while the rest of us were in jeopardy. Luckily for you, you have never faced such a situation; you know you and your brother have a home and a family here with us. You are strong, beautiful, immortal, talented… and my favorite."

"Y-your favorite, Master?"

"Of course. You are like… like my personal little sunbeam. You have no idea how much joy your arrival brought into this house; just when I thought I'd never find a true, fine jewel there you were, and that is why I will always protect you, no matter what. You even have it in your name, you are a Gift From God. Oh, yes, I forgot you do not like God. Then you are a Gift From The Gods, the ones you like best. So, even though sometimes I make you go through situations like this one, you know I do it to increase your own force, to make you indestructible."

"Thank you, Master, I really appreciate that."

"I know you do."

He patted my cheek and left.

Next morning, I was still going over Aro's words when I was most rudely interrupted.

"What are you doing?" asked Demetri, leaning over my shoulder.

I quickly shook him off. "None of your business."

"Aw, c'mon, let me see."

He snatched the piece of paper I was working on and examined it. "This is very good, Janette, very good indeed. I didn't know you could draw so well. Would you draw my portrait?"

I knocked him down with a strong round of torture and recovered my drawing. When I stopped, he laughed.

"Hey, hey, peace. I didn't mean to offend you, I meant it as a compliment. Now tell me all about that drawing. Please?"

I knew he wouldn't leave me alone until I told him, and since I was planning to make this public I decided to oblige.

"It's a design. For a coat of arms. It's just that I think that a respectable house like ours should have one, just as in royalty. After all, we are the kings of the vampire world."

"We? Aro, Marcus and Caius are the kings, Janie, not us. Or what, are you imagining yourself queen? Aro would love it, I'm sure. Oh, why do you look so angry? Is it Caius, then?"

"You… you…" I tried to get a grip on myself. I would not give Demetri the pleasure of making me truly angry.

"What, Jane, what? Say it!"

"Go away."

"Why? Are you scared? Scared that I might be right?"

"Leave me alone!"

"The hell I will! Not without _this_."

Suddenly, he grabbed me by the shoulders and kissed me on the mouth. When I fought him he pushed me all the way to a wall, pinning me against it. I tried to shake him off, but even though we were both vampires he was stronger than me. Vampirically he was five years my junior, so that gave him newborn strength, and even as humans I would not have been a match for him, since physically _I_ was at least ten years younger. I was so shocked and outraged by his assault that I didn't even think of using my talent to defend myself and had to endure the pressure of his mouth against mine for as long as he wanted. But when I was free I reacted, not by knocking him down with pain like the torturer Aro taught me to be, but by slapping him hard across the face like the lady I was born to be. In that moment I felt more a woman than a vampire.

"Don't you dare touching me again!" I roared. "If you ever, ever do as much as looking at me against my wishes I will not hesitate to rip you apart piece by piece. I mean it, Demetri."

"I know you do," he smiled smugly. "But though you are trying to pretend I know you liked it. Up for another round?" he arched his eyebrows suggestively, but the vicious snarl that broke through my lips seemed to make him desist.

I had never been that furious before, so furious that I wasn't even able to torture him. My body was crouched and trembling, and the outline of every object in my vision field was tinted red. More snarls were coming. I truly had never experienced such white-hot wrath before and suddenly I knew why I was so enraged: it wasn't Demetri's assault itself what bothered me, though it certainly had something to do. What really hurt me was that he had stolen my very first kiss; his unworthy mouth had taken that sacred first kiss I had been saving for Him, the one and only man I could ever belong to. Yet now my lips were Demetri's, and the more I thought about it the redder my vision became.

"Jane, breathe," said Demetri, his voice finally serious. "Relax. I'm sorry. I could not help myself. Peace?"

He took a step toward me and put a hand on my shoulder. His contact, brief as it was, was enough for me to fulfill my promise.

"_I told you not to touch me again_," I growled before lunging myself at him, reaching for his throat.

We began a fight. To his credit, he did not quite attack me; he only tried to defend himself. On the contrary, I was all for ripping him apart, but not before he could see why people had begun to call me devil and witch again.

Next thing I knew, Felix was pinning my arms to my back. I tried to shake him off, but he was strong enough to stand my powers without releasing me.

"Jane, stop it. I really do not want to hurt you. Please." He had a calming voice, and soon I stopped twisting in his arms.

Marya was next to Demetri, but it looked like she was shielding him from me. _But I was the aggraviated one!, _I wanted to shout. Before I could open my mouth, Marya spoke,

"Your scandal was heard in the entire castle," she said, looking mostly at me. "_They_ want to see you right away."

Bravo. Now I had been summoned to His presence for a reproachable behavior. The last thing I had ever wanted was to make a bad impression in His eyes and now I was about to have it thanks to that… Unspeakable who had attacked me. My face could have been as red as my eyes.

"Well, well, well," started Marcus. "From what we heard, you two had quite a serious argument. It sounded like you did something to her, Demetri, what was it?"

"I kissed her," he said proudly, almost as if he expected to be congratulated. Alec looked at him and hissed. The Trio ignored him.

"Jane?"

"This… this… bastard jumped at me and kissed me against my will."

"Why did you not fight him off?"

"He was stronger," I mumbled.

"And what about your talent? Why did you not use your torture power on him?"

"Because she liked it," interrupted Demetri.

I could have jumped at him again, had Aro's eyes not been fixed on me.

"Demetri," he began sternly, "what you have done to Jane is a most reproachable act. This is not how we behave. There is an enormous responsibility on our shoulders, and therefore we cannot let ourselves be driven by our passions, all the more when the feeling is only one-sided. If you ever force yourself on Jane or any other of the girls again I myself will… what was it, that you threatened to do, Jane dearest? Ah, yes, rip you apart piece by piece. Do not forget that this beauty you just offended was the one who gave you this life, and therefore has all the right to take it back if she finds it suitable. We give you a second chance only because you have proven to be a loyal, useful element; after all, her venom runs in your veins. Now leave and think of a way to apologize to her. Janette, cara mia, please come with me."

Aro's words had been calm and serene, but they had the effect of a whip. Demetri bowed his head and left without even daring to look at me. Meanwhile, Aro stood up and opened the door to the one room that was soundproof. I squeezed my brother's hand on my way there.

_Alec's POV_

I could not help it –as soon as my sister and Aro disappeared I went after the beast. Neither Caius nor Marcus made any attempt to stop me, and I took that as an authorization.

"You there!" I shouted. Demetri stopped and turned around. I covered the distance between us in long, fast strides.

"Yes, Alec?"

I grabbed him by the cloak and shook him as hard as I could. "_My sister is sacred, you animal ! Sacred! _Your mother would not even deserve to be her rug. Whatever your reasons were to lay that filthy, disgusting mouth of yours on my sister, those are the reasons that will get you burnt alive. Listen to me, dog, if you appreciate at all the life she gave you: do not even _think_ of her again."

He did reply something, but, with the temper Jane and I shared since before birth, I walked away without hearing a single word.

_Jane's POV_

Once we were inside the room I took three breaths I did not need to calm myself before talking to Him.

"Thanks, Master," I said, bowing my head.

"It was nothing. He deserved it and I would have proceeded the same way had it been any other girl from this house. Well, maybe not. It did anger me particularly that he touched _you_. You are too much for anyone." He patted my head and, suddenly, he burst out laughing.

"Master, what is it?" I asked, totally bewildered.

"Ha, ha, ha!" he kept laughing. "My sweet little Jane, you have an admirer! Poor boy, it must have taken him a lot of courage to do that. To risk your fury… not everyone would do it, though the temptation is indeed quite heavy. You attacked him and you have my full support for that Yet, I wonder… would you have reacted the same if the one who kissed you had been… me?"

I could not have been more shocked if God had proven he was real after all and appeared before my eyes. He caressed my cheek and my hair. He found the pins that held my hair in place and took them off, thus making a golden cascade roll all over my shoulders. He hadn't seen me with my hair loose in ten years, and his eyes sparkled with delight when he ran his fingers through it.

"M-Ma- Master, I-I rea-really…" I stammered, lost.

He put a finger on my lips "Sshh. Hush, Jane. There is nothing to fear."

He took my face carefully in his hands, looking into my eyes, and pressed his lips to mine. I couldn't help it; ten years seemed to me like a long time to have waited and I held to him as fiercely as I dared. Reason screamed at me that I should be more respectful but I really did not care any more. He deepened the kiss and I couldn't help but moan quietly; my lips and tongue were as clumsy as possible, inexperienced, but he seemed to like it, since I heard him chuckle once. His back was arched though one of his hands had fallen to my waist and lifted me off the ground while he kissed me, kissed me, kissed me. _What do I do now?_ I thought. _What does he expect me to do?_ I wouldn't have minded to please him in any way he wanted me to, no matter what that was. After all, I had always been his, even when I was human, I was destined to be his, I already belonged to him. But I had no idea what he wanted now, and I felt plainly terrified.

The kiss lasted a few more glorious, blissful seconds until he bit softly my lower lip and finally pulled back. When he looked into my eyes again, his smile was sweet and kind.

"Count this one as your first kiss."

"Why- why did you do that, Master?" I gasped.

"I just wanted you to get rid of that bad taste. Kissing is not as bad as he made it seem. Also, you needed to have a real experience, something that I think you liked," I nodded immediately. "And, perhaps, it could have been that Demetri's merry, proud, but by no means sated expression made me terribly curious. It seemed that he enjoyed himself quite a bit and I do not like people knowing or having something I do not."

"A-and… do you think his expression was… j-jus-justified?"

"No," he answered quickly. I looked down until I felt his voice at my ear. "It was a terrible understatement of a face."

It was too much beauty to bear –I fell at his feet. "My Lord," I murmured. "My Lord."

I knew he did not like me to address him that way; he once had claimed that I was not his slave or his servant, I was totally free. I had in turn explained that my freedom allowed me to call him however I considered appropriate. I hadn't added this, but to me he was my Master and my Lord, my savior and my only God, my rightful owner in all ways.

I knew it was stupid of me to let such hopes exist, but that kiss had only destroyed the wall that hadn't allowed me to give voice to my heart. After feeling myself in his arms I could not stop the words anymore and they almost came out aloud.

I was utterly, completely, hopelessly, heartbreakingly in love with Aro.


	7. Don't you mourn the sun

**Don't you mourn the sun**

I literally couldn't feel the ground under my feet. Everything felt surreal, dreamlike, as if I was walking on clouds, or inside a bubble. I went to the rooms Alec and I shared, knowing he would be waiting for me there.

He greeted me and handed me a cup of freshly extracted blood. It tasted delicious, warm and sweet. I sat down on a chair, next to the window, and sighed contently. Alec walked toward me and kissed my cheek.

"My darling little sister," he said, caressing my hair. "He is going to break your heart."

"On the contrary," I replied. "He put its pieces together when it was shattered."

"Only to separate them again."

He took the chair I was sitting on in his arms and deposited me in front of the mirror.

"Let's fix that hair of yours."

While he brushed and combed my hair he kept trying to discourage me.

"You are playing with fire, little sister, and you are not the one who controls the flames. Do not play his game, I beg you, or you will get burnt."

"For him, I wouldn't mind a thousand stakes."

He was the one to sigh now –he knew too well how stubborn I was. He put the brush on the table and placed his hands on my shoulders.

"Jane, look," he said, pointing at the mirror. "What do you see?"

I admired my reflection: the small face still framed by a cascade of golden hair, my red eyes, now burgundy after I'd spent so much energy with my Master, and the rich black velvet cloak that covered everything else.

"I see myself," I said, "and you."

"Forget about identities and forget about me. What do you see?"

"A girl."

He nodded. "Blond hair. Pale face. Red eyes," I continued.

"Beautiful?"

"Yes."

"Young?"

"Uh… I suppose."

"Strong, interesting, attractive?"

"Er… yes?"

"Absolutely. Now, if you'd just met this girl, would you like her to go wasted on a man who sees her only as a mascot?"

Now I saw where he was heading. "Alec, please. This is not something I can cont-"

"For whom she's only a plaything? A nice ornament to show off?"

"You are being unfair, Alec. We owe him our lives and I'm sure he loves us sincerely."

"I don't doubt that, Janette. What I'm not sure of is if you should lay your heart to be stepped on, and whether I should allow it."

"That will not happen."

In a matter of seconds my hair was back in its chignon. "Sure?"

"No. But I hope."

A few weeks went by, but I did not have the chance to remotely see who was right in this new bet, and not even remotely the opportunity to repeat that kiss. I did want to try, but I could never bring myself to make any insinuations to my Master, and he never made any himself. Then I noticed something was wrong. There were sudden changes in the rules and the Trio was overly cautious when it came to movement outside the castle. We were instructed not to go out unless it was absolutely necessary, and if so we had to leave in groups of three or more. Eventually we took turns to go out and bring back food for the entire family. When I asked Caius why we were taking all those measures he only said that tough times were coming, and that we should be prepared for them.

I didn't quite understand what he had meant by that until one night Felix came to my rooms and announced,

"Someone wants an audience with Aro."

"Who?"

"She won't tell me. She insists and says that he knows her. She's with other three or four girls. Could you please deal with her, Jane? She's rather insistent."

I looked at Felix. I liked him. He was at least twice my size but never took advantage of it. On the contrary, he was most respectful and gentlemanly, but without losing that very special sense of humor that was so him. And as if Alec and Aro were not enough, it seemed that he, too, wanted to protect me. Yes, I definitely liked Felix.

"Yes, of course. Don't worry, Felix."

I went downstairs to the Main Hall and found the girls Felix referred to. They could have been mistaken for sisters, so alike they were. All of them had red hair, different but unforgettable shades; upon closer inspection I realized their eyes were emerald green. To my surprise, they were human, and to my more intense surprise, they were quite beautiful and sensual, much more attractive than humans normally were –even the best ones-, and I suddenly didn't want to show them to my Master, though I wasn't sure why.

"So… who are you?" I asked.

"My name is Selene," began one of them, taking two little steps forward, "and these are Aleida, Chelsea, Mary and Coco," she gestured at her companions.

"What do you want?"

"We need to see Aro."

"Why?"

"It's a matter of life and death that we need to discuss with him. He's the only one who can save us."

I did not move an inch and she seemed to understand I would not present them until I'd heard everything first, because she added, "We're being hunted."

"Hunted?"

"We are witches."

Her words took my completely by surprise. All this time I'd thought that witches were only an excuse to get rid of people, like what had happened to Alec and me; not once had I considered that those stories were true. Yet there they were, matching every description I had read and heard in both my lives.

"We are witches," Selene continued, "and we seek protection with the only ones who can help us. Witches and vampires have worked together before, with the best results. The entire supernatural world is threatened once more, and without an alliance defeat is certain. Please, let us talk to him."

I considered the matter for a while. Selene's words had finally made everything fall into place. It was perfectly logical that the Trio was overprotecting us, now that it was hunting time again. I remembered the time when my brother and me had suffered that persecution and finally allowed Selene and her second in command, Mary, to see Aro, Marcus and Caius.

I went into the Hall with them while the others waited outside with Felix. The story Selene told my Master was the same she had told me. It seemed logical that the alliance would be formed, and that's why I was shocked when Marcus said,

"We are truly sorry to hear your grief, Selene, but sadly we cannot help you."

"Why?"

"We are afraid your coven is already too present in the hunters' minds. They might have even followed you here. It would not take them long to find you here and it would be prejudicial for us all if you were caught here. Everyone would perish."

"But that's my point! Together we would not be caught. Neither your clan nor my coven are humans, yet we're being massacred by them. You know how this is: if we do not join forces we will all be annihilated. Please."

That _please_ was tiny and imploring; all her pain and fear went inside that word. Her hands trembled with desperation; all six fingers of each hand were shaking. I looked around and saw that most of the guard was moved by her and by the whole situation; they could not believe she had been given a no. But the refusal was repeated, and though she tried all sorts of arguments to convince our Masters, she and her coven were forced to leave again.

Once they were gone Aro sighed.

"Tough times indeed." Then he rose from his throne. "Felix, Demetri, Georgette, go to the city and around it: Pisa, Livorno, Arezzo, Firenze, Siena. Bring as much food as you can. We can keep them in the dungeons, underground, until we need them. The more, the better, but be back tomorrow night. From this moment on, no one is allowed to leave the castle at all, under any circumstances. No excuses, no pretexts. Everyone stays here until further notice. Jane, Alec." He waved and we went to his side. "You must not leave my sight, even for a second. You are the strongest, most valuable elements and your life is precious."

"Yes, Master."

"Good. Now everyone get back to work. We need to be at our sharpest." After a pause he added, "Poor girls. Ah, Marcus, my brother, I hope one day you will be able to forget old sentimental affairs and give a hand to those who need it."

We were all puzzled by what Aro had said, but no one dared asking. We locked ourselves up in our respective rooms and night had barely fallen when we started to hear the screams of hunters and hunted.


	8. The Phoenix

**The ****Phoenix**

It hit. Stronger, crueler than we had ever seen it, it hit. Witch hunting seemed to be conducted by butchers and beasts rather than the so-called Holy Pope and his ghost-God. Even the toughest of us often had to cover our ears: the screams would travel all the way from the nearby villages to the castle.

To shut it out, we would play music. Over the years Marcus had taught me to play the piano, and Alec played the violin; basically, we could all play at least one instrument, and during two weeks the castle became a permanent orchestra. Though most of the times our sharp hearing overpowered the music, at least we could find some comfort and the awareness to thank the Trio for saving us from that fate.

The place where I could find some comfort was the garden. I'd taken to watering the flowers and my Master had given me permission to plant grapes so later on I could play and make wine. This was a pleasure I'd brought from my human life, and which I enjoyed deeply. Sometimes Alec would join me as I recreated those few happy memories and that, now more than ever, was quite relaxing and soothing. It was the only thing we could do to stay sane.

Days and days went by like this, and instead of receding the horrors became worse. We went through a period of thirst almost to the point of starvation, because though the real monsters were often the survivors the situation was becoming too dangerous even for us, and going out to find food was completely out of the question. Fights broke out and it took quite a lot of Alec's power to make sure there was no real damage and losses among us.

Finally, what provided a real distraction was in fact a tragedy. Surprising as it was, during our reclusion we got visitors. At first glance they were unrecognizable, and when we did identify them it was rather shocking. It was Chelsea, one of the girls that had come with Selena to seek help, almost a month ago. Now only Aleida accompanied her, and they both looked terrible. Disheveled hair, dirty faces and bodies, and clothes that were little more than rags. They were thin to the extreme, and looked as if they had been badly beaten up, which was probably the very circumstance. Aleida looked even weaker than Chelsea; she could barely stand on her feet. After a few steps, she collapsed in Demetri's arms, unconscious. Chelsea still had enough strength to run towards our Master.

"Aro!" she cried, throwing herself at his feet. As soon as she spoke, she burst into tears.

"O-our coven h-has been des-destroyed," she sobbed. "They caught us and- and took us to the dungeons and tortured us and-" she continued crying. "Aleida and I are the only survivors now. Please, please, I implore you, protect us. They have already realized we escaped, and they're looking for us. Please."

"Hush, child," said Aro calmly, and the softness of his voice did indeed soothe the hysterical girl. "What happened?"

"S-someone be-betrayed us. I don't know who. But one night, they came for us. They knew where we were, and when we would be all together. They-they took us to those dungeons in the Castello di Ma-ma…"

"Massimo," Alec and I said together. How well we remembered that place, despite the years.

"Yeah, the Castello di Massimo. They took us there and began asking questions like crazy. Questions and questions and questions, one after the other. Then they tied us and locked us up. There wasn't one thing they didn't do: they insulted us, they beat us, they tortured us, they raped us… in the end they just started burning us. They would pick one and we were forced to watch as she…" tears came to her eyes again.

"But you are witches. Why did you not use your magic?"

"What magic can we have, mistreated, starved and brutalized as we have been? We are too weak to perform our spells. We can only rely on our human resistance."

"I see. And what happened after that?"

"Two nights ago, the guards had hurt us so badly that they saw no need to tie or watch us. We took the chance and escaped. Now we're here again, and I beg you to help us. If you refuse, then kill us; death at your hands will be better than with them."

"Suppose we agreed to protect you," said Caius. "What can you offer us?"

Chelsea's voice was a whisper. "Anything. Anything. We'll be your servants, your slaves, anything you want us to be. Just, please, don't send us back to them." She turned to Marcus and continued. "As we talk, Selene burns in the stake, and with her all your grudges. We are not the ones to blame for what happened between you. She's dead now, and I assure you she felt every second of that death. Put everything behind, please."

The Trio left their thrones and went into a private room to confer. The room was designed especially so that no one in the outside could hear a word, and so we waited clueless and expectant. Some vampires were surrounding the witches now, tending to them and trying to provide some comfort. Whatever our Masters decided, most of us were already decided to help them as much as we could. Alec and I, having experienced word by word what Chelsea had described, in that very castle, made sure that they were given anything they could need: food, clothes, medical attention, etc. A part of me feared my Master would get angry if I did too much on my own and without permission, but then I thought that perhaps he would understand me, since he had once done the same thing for me and my brother. I was thinking like him, seeing potential in humans and preserving it

"We have made a decision," said Aro finally. "Now that the only obstacle for Marcus has disappeared, we see no reason why we should not help you. It is important that people like you, with your talent, intelligence and beauty, is separated from the simple humans and given the chance to bloom in a new and better life. That is the criteria we have always followed, and this is no exception. Chelsea and Aleida, if you are willing, you can join this Family. As vampires. We offer you to make you immortal, with endless strength and youth. In exchange, we ask your complete devotion and loyalty without hesitation for as long as you exist. So, what do you think?"

The tears that ran down Chelsea's cheeks were now of gratitude. "Yes, yes, a thousand times yes, for both of us, yes. We are yours forever." She took Aro's hand and kissed it. "Master," she whispered fervently.

"Perfect. Alec," Aro turned to address my brother. If I remember correctly, you once showed interest in changing someone. Would you like to do the honors with Chelsea and Aleida?"

"If they don't mind."

"We would be honored."

"Then, boy, go ahead."

My brother knelt before Chelsea and moved her hair to leave her neck exposed.

"Don't be afraid," he reassured her. "I'll make sure you feel nothing. And after three days, no one will ever be able to hurt you again."

Chelsea smiled softly and leaned forward to express her willingness. Alec bit her and waited until she was almost drained; later on he told me drinking Chelsea's blood had been the single most intense experience he'd had. After Chelsea he turned to Aleida, who was still unconscious, but she only took him a second. Neither of them screamed or even made the slightest sound, so I guessed he was using his power on them. Ah, my brother, always so considerate.

Felix and Demetri took the girls to the room where we had all spent our transformation days and woken up to this life. It would be almost as quick as with Alec and me, because these girls were small in size, too. While we waited, we celebrated the arrival of two elements we were sure would be loyal end effective.

I wish I had known how much suffering one of them had in stock for me.


	9. Suddenly I See

**Suddenly I See**

"It's almost over."

"Oh, really? I want to see them."

"Let's go together; I'm curious, too."

Alec and I went to the small room where Aleida and Chelsea were almost done with their transformation. We found Aro and Marcus waiting, too, but they didn't mind our joining them, after all these were in some way Alec's girls since he'd created them. When the girls opened their eyes, they looked happy.

"Welcome."

They smiled. There had barely been a change in their appearance because they were already pale and beautiful and magical, but now they had a certain aura of serenity that hadn't been there before.

"How do you feel?" asked Marcus. Now that Selene was gone he seemed much warmer and friendlier toward the girls.

"Fine, I think," answered Aleida. "Everything is so _clear_."

"Yes, it's confusing at the beginning," said Alec.

"And your magic?" intervened Aro.

The girls concentrated for a few seconds and then replied. "Perhaps we should give it a couple of days. Everything in our nature has changed, and we need time to adapt."

In their faces, though, I saw the worry. Had their lost their powers? That had yet to be seen, and if it were the case Aro wouldn't be in the least pleased.

Aleida, Chelsea, Marcus and Aro left together for a tour around the castle and to discuss the girls' position and rank within the Family. During the night, though, I was wandering around the garden when, out in the distance, I saw Chelsea sitting by herself. I decided to go downstairs and join her, maybe we could talk a little. When Alec and I had joined the Volturi, we had felt very welcome. The whole place worked like a family, and it had totally meant that for us, when we were newborns. Therefore, now it was my turn to welcome someone, luckily not as exasperating as Demetri had always been.

"Mind if I join you?"

She smiled. "I'll be more than glad."

I sat beside her. "So? How do you like this life?"

"It's a miracle. God couldn't have given me a greater blessing."

God, God, God, again that fantasy. But I restrained myself from telling her that. _It's not the right moment, _I thought. _You'll have time to enlighten her later._

"And… have you found your superpower yet?"

She laughed. "No. I'm not even sure I have one. Aro says I do, and so does Aleida, but we have to wait for them to appear."

"Then don't worry. Alec's and mine appeared just in time."

"You have a talent?" I nodded. "Wow. What is it?"

"Umm… it's difficult to describe."

"Can you show it?"

I laughed. "You wouldn't like it if I did. Well, you see, I torture people." Chelsea's eyes went wide. "With one look, I create an illusion of pain in people's head so they think they're burning or something like that. I don't know exactly how it feels, but given what I have seem I think I'm quite good at it." After a pause I continue. "Alec is my opposite. He cuts all the senses: you cannot feel, you cannot smell, hear, see, taste, you are completely alone in your mind. He once did it to me, because I asked him out of curiosity, and believe me, it's absolutely terrifying."

"I can imagine. So it's better not to upset you."

"I would say."

"And what do the talents depend on? Why do some have one, and some others not, and why that specific talent?"

"I don't know why some of us are talented, but I think the power depends on your experiences when human, what you were able to do back then."

"You tortured people when you were human?"

"Well, not quite. I believe mine comes from having been the victim of what I can do now."

"What do you mean?"

I tell her our story and observe the understanding in her eyes. We have gone through exactly the same, in the same place, even, and she knows what I'm talking about.

"Then we can get our revenge, too?"

"I suppose so. Talk to Aro, he's comprehensive and will surely help you."

We were in silence for a while until curiosity got the best of me again. "Where do you come from? I mean, how did you join Selene?"

"We met when we were both children. She was a little older than me. One day, she disappeared and we lost touch for a few years. Meanwhile, I realized strange things were happening to me. Weird events, things that I couldn't explain. I couldn't tell anyone because of the witch hunting; I knew what my destiny would be if I said anything. It was really hard for me to understand. Then, all of a sudden, she came back. She asked me to meet her one night in an old farm and she explained that she'd left because she'd realized what she was, what we were, and that she'd had to prepare herself before she could come back for me.

"I knew that given my nature I wouldn't be able to stay in my hometown and decided to join her. She'd already found Coco and it wasn't long before Mary and Aleida arrived, too. For a while, we were very happy together. We practiced our magic and received the benefits of it. Beauty, youth, men, anything. But then this new wave of attacks began, so much stronger than the others. Things became so dangerous that Selene decided to come here and ask for help. She didn't think Marcus would still hold a grudge against her, but he did, and that was what doomed us. We found a hiding place we used for a couple of days before we were found. I swear we were betrayed. Stupidly, we thought that if we didn't use our magic to defend us we would be able to leave after the trial without charges. My God, there wasn't even a trial! We were automatically considered guilty. Worst is, we were. Of everything they charged us with. When we tried to use our magic, we realized it was gone: with the minimal food they gave us, they mixed I don't know which drugs to weaken us. Add that to the fact that we were tortured, raped, beaten, hurt in every single way, we had no strength left.

"They burned us one by one, starting with Selene, until Aleida and I were able to escape. The rest you know."

I sighed. "What a mess. But, well, at least that led us here, to this place, where Aro, Marcus and Caius protect us and care for us. We have unlimited youth, beauty, and time to enjoy them. _And_ the possibility of having a special talent. Then you could go back and make those beasts pay for what they did to you."

She shrugged. "Maybe. To tell the truth, I have no idea of what I want to do. I'm too confused by this change. I mean, I love it, but it will take time to adjust."

"Yes. One needs to go slowly."

I wait a little bit before I ask the question that's consuming me with girly curiosity.

"Do you know what happened between Marcus and Selene? If he refused to help you because of that, it must have been something serious."

"I'm not sure, to tell the truth, but I think that they had a relationship and then one of them found out that the other wasn't as into the relationship as it seemed, or there was a third person involved, or something like that. I don't really know; Selene never spoke about it until we came here the first time."

"I see. Poor Selene."

"Absolutely. She was the best sister anyone could have asked for. I think that once day I'll have to talk to Marcus about that. I can't just ignore it, and neither can Aleida."

I sighed. "I suppose some issues could be solved there." After a long pause I added, "Have you hunted yet?"

"Hunted, no, but I do have fed. Demetri got us a couple of villagers during the evening."

"Oh. I was going to ask you if you wanted to go hunting with me."

She laughed. "Of course I do! I have no idea about how to hunt and those humans were nothing. When do we leave?"

"Right now."

"Perfect. Let's go!"

We got on our feet and left for San Gimignano, where I taught her some hunting techniques I'd learned from Aro himself when I was a newborn. I caught myself having fun, which surprised me greatly. I wondered why that was happening, with no success, so I decided to just let go and enjoy myself. Chelsea was a sweet girl, who unlike me had been able to get over her grudges: for me, revenge had been an immediate need, something I had enjoyed deeply, and even now I purred with pleasure whenever I heard people talk about the strange demon that had annihilated an entire village almost twelve years ago; Chelsea, on the other hand, was only ready to go forward and leave all traces of human traumas behind. I would have to study her later on. But that could wait. In that moment, I just wanted to live. And I could. Forever.


	10. Complications

**Hello, beloved ones! I know –soooo long! But I'm desperately trying to save my school year, I beg you to understand. Anyway, I wanted to finish this before my birthday (this Saturday!), and I did it!**

**Hands up for Water For Elephants !**

**Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Complications**

Friendship. That's what it was, pure and simple. That easiness I felt when I was with Chelsea hunting, debating during trials and meetings, or just chatting, was only friendship. I had been so confused at first because I'd never had a friend, ever: boys were too scared of my father to even look at me and girls were envious and knew they would totally fade if they stood next to me, so I was left alone with Alec. But Alec was my twin brother, and that's the relationship we'd always had, we were hardly ever separated and thus we'd lived the exact same experiences; there weren't many new things for one to tell the other. Yet, with Chelsea, there were tons of things to share, and we were both amused by each other's stories.

I knew I had to be careful. I had never learned to trust anyone and I wouldn't learn in one day. Yet, what could I lose? I had power, I was more beautiful than I ever thought I could be, I had my brother and my Master, the two most important beings in my life, I was someone in life. I would take a chance. As days passed, I knew I had made the right choice: Chelsea proved to be sweeter than the blood of a child and we became very close.

She and Aleida proved to be quite special. Their magic, their witch magic, had been lost, and no one could tell if it would ever come back. But in exchange they got vampire powers valuable enough to make up for the lost abilities. Chelsea, for example, got hers during a trial. There was this coven of five, three of which had already been proven guilty of killing in the public eye. In another circumstances the entire coven would have been executed right away, but this time Aro was trying to persuade the other two of joining us. However, both had refused time and time again, insisting that they would stay with the others even if that meant death. Aro had tried everything, from arguments to threats, with no success. He called a meeting, leaving the prisoners under Aleida and Chelsea's supervision.

There was a lot of discussion, because the majority insisted that those two elements weren't worth so much effort. But Aro, in a stubbornness that I had never seen before, was determined to subject those vampires no matter what. Finally, he decided to execute those three vampires and make his two interests stay, whether they liked it or not. It was the first time he was openly determined to use violence, that he'd said it so bluntly. I was a bit scared and worried, it could turn into an ugly fight and although I knew we had all the chances in our side I didn't want my Master or my brother to be in danger, no matter how small it was.

"Oh, you're back," said one of the valuable ones. "Well, we have decided to join you."

Her tone was completely matter-of-fact. I looked at my Master. Surprise covered his face for the shortest second, but he recovered quickly.

"Wonderful. May I ask what has brought this unexpected decision?"

"We changed our minds," she said simply. The other nodded.

The woman's mate, who would be executed, looked at her with undiluted hatred. There wasn't pain or heartbreak, just hatred like the one I'd felt (and sometimes could still feel) towards my torturers. It was all very strange; just a few moments ago they'd sworn eternal loyalty to each other. Aro saw this, too, and wasted no time in taking the woman's hand to See. What he saw couldn't have helped him too much, because he frowned again. Then he decided to just take advantage of this happy situation and fulfilled his wishes. The two vampires didn't even blink as they saw their clan torn and burned.

Aro sent them with Marcus and Caius for the customary guidance tour, and then focused his attention on Aleida and Chelsea.

"All right, ladies," he said with the broadest smile on his face. "Who did it?"

"Did what, Master?" asked Aleida.

"That sudden change of mind in those vampires. It wasn't actually their decision; they could not have abandoned their clan just like that, without looking back. One of you influenced them to do that. Who was it?"

They looked at each other and finally Aro chuckled. "You did it so swiftly that you didn't even notice. Then, please give me your hands, girls."

Chelsea was the first one, and immediately my Master's face lit up. "Oh, here it is. Chelsea, darling, you have a gift! You broke the emotional connection between them, that is why they did not mind leaving their loved ones –because they did not love them anymore! This is fantastic, absolutely useful. Chelsea, there is a bright future ahead of you!"

Chelsea bowed to Aro and hugged me. This meant she would get a promotion, maybe a rank as high as mine, and that made us both happy. But then came the other power, and it made us all think for a while.

"I time-travel!" sounded a happy voice running down the hall. "I time-travel!"

Alec, Felix, Demetri, Chelsea and I were together in one of the Halls. We all looked at the source of the noise and found Aleida's radiant face.

"What do you mean?" asked Felix.

"I mean that I can go to the past, revisit everything that has ever happened!"

"And what about the future?" asked Alec.

She made a face. "I'm working on it."

Demetri got on his feet and took her to Aro, Marcus and Caius, the rest of us following him.

"Master," he began, "Aleida has just found her talent. She says she-"

"I time-travel!" she announced for the third time in five minutes. Felix looked at me and rolled his eyes. I tried to hold back a giggle, and wasn't very successful.

The thing is, you might have noticed we did not particularly like Aleida. Unlike Chelsea, she was a little… how to say it… unbearable? Annoying? Irritating? I mean, we all were terribly ambitious and self-centered, but her attitude was going too far. And she was not even one of the influential ones! That kind of behavior was allowed perhaps for the high-rank ones, like Alec, like now Chelsea, like me. Yet Alec was quiet, discreet, and reserved, Chelsea was the sweetest of girls and I … well, it wouldn't be nice if I told you what I think of myself. Or what I thought, anyway. Things have changed since then.

But given everything we knew and had seen of Aleida until then we knew that after her talent she would be just impossible to deal with. Our fears were confirmed when Aro, after holding her hand and Seeing for a while, he said,

"What Aleida says is true indeed. She has the power of time traveling to the past," here my brother and I exchanged a brief smile –her victory was not complete. "This is simply wonderful. Think of the possibilities, dear ones: if we ever have a doubt during a trial, Aleida will take no time to see into the past to find the truth and Chelsea will make justice easier to apply. What else can we need?"

Then I froze. Years ago I had heard those same words, but they had sounded so different… _If we ever have a doubt during a trial, Jane will take no time to make anyone tell the truth and then Alec will make justice easier to apply_. It had been such a beautiful moment, when Alec and I discovered our talents and were given the darkest and softest of cloaks. It had once been us, the powerful ones, the promising ones. It had been, and it would still be. I held my brother's hand and the look we exchanged now was no longer that of amusement, but one of determination.

We were dismissed, all but Aleida, who was required to stay and discuss some points with the Trio. When we left, she looked directly at us and smiled condescendingly. It took all my strength not to hurt her. There would be time for real suffering, of that I was sure. We would not stop being what we were, we would not lose our rank. The Witch Twins would live up to their name.


	11. Competition

**Hello, my dear ones. I'm so sorry about the delay! But now that there's actually a chance I might save the school year I'm more relaxed. Wish me luck!**

**Anyway, enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Competition**

"I hate plotting against people."

"I hate people plotting against us."

Alec sighed. "You're right. So, what's the plan?"

It was my turn to sigh. There was no plan at all, the only thing I knew was that we needed to do something about Aleida and -I forced myself to think of her- Chelsea. Ok, Aleida particularly. There just was no way we would lose what we had built in these years. We wouldn't, period. But, how could we ensure our power in a permanent way? I desperately tried to find faults in Aleida that were strong enough to cause her dismissal, her destruction, or at the very least her deposition. Yet, nothing we could think of was enough: not killing humans for fun -we all did that, and it was great-, not being Demetri's lover –after all, what a vampire did with his or her intimate life was not relevant unless it interfered with the work- not being unbearable and impossible to deal with –who wasn't?- . We definitely needed something bigger, something so heavy that it could not be forgiven. But, what?

We arrived to the conclusion that we would have to invent something to bring her down. I was perfectly fine with the idea; after all it wouldn't be the first time I lied. But we had to be very careful to make sure nothing backfired to us. What could we do? There was something else to consider: by that moment probably everyone had noticed that though Aleida argued with everyone her relationship with us was particularly bad, and they had probably figured out why, too. Therefore, if something happened to her, it would be fairly easy to identify Alec and me as the troublemakers. We needed an ally, and there were probably a few who would be willing to help, but we wanted to keep this as quiet as possible both because we didn't want word to spread and because we always tried to keep most of our intelligence and capacities hidden, so no one could ever really know how strong or weak we really were. Simple strategy.

After talking to my brother I decided to take a bath. Of course, I don't need baths, none of us do: our skin is impermeable and no dirt ever stays on it, our scent is always sweet and appealing, etc., but the warm water had a calming effect on my frozen body, my muscles relaxed with the contrast in temperature and it helped me think. Besides, my hair did need washing. I prepared a bathtub filled with water hot beyond boiling and stepped inside. Ah, it felt so good… I let my head fall back and closed my eyes. What to do, what to do… Perhaps I could accuse her of exposing us. How? She could be caught feeding in public… Or maybe she could attempt treachery, but then we would need someone else to testify against her, saying that she had tried to convince him of betraying the Family. Marya? One of the new ones, who already hated her? Could be. But then that person could be accused, too, and that would not be good. Hm…

I decided to go with the exposure thing. It couldn't be so hard to persuade some humans to start spreading some rumors about a redhead demon they had seen in the city, not if I had my talent to help convincing them. I enjoyed the water for a few more minutes and finally went to look for my brother again. We went to the garden and I explained everything to him while he brushed my hair.

"Not half-bad, Janette," he said approvingly. "We could make it work."

"When could we start?"

"Tonight, if you want; there is no time to waste. That harpy moves too fast. The sooner we bring her down, the better."

It was still quite early in the morning, just before six, so we had all day to plan what we would do and say. At nightfall, we went out to the warm streets of Volterra to start the hunt of more than blood.

It was as easy as expected. Humans were too easy to frighten and force to obey. If I used my powers that night, I did it only for fun. I could almost taste victory in my mouth and there was no better way to celebrate than watching how those little insignificant things writhed helplessly with just one look. We recruited ten humans who would be killed as soon as the rumours started running, just to make sure no one could find out that the stories were, in fact, inserted by us.

The icing of the evening was the children Alec found. Little kids were the best dessert you could imagine, all soft and sweet and warm, and in situations like these they were like, say, a good wine or a glass of champagne. They were the easiest to get, too, they often mistook us for angels and followed us wherever we told them to. Some of us took only stray children, the abandoned ones no one cared about, but Alec and I made no distinction whatsoever and that's why when he spotted two little things in fine clothes and jewellery we did not hesitate.

"Hello, pretty ones," he said. "Where are your parents?"

The children pointed at the distance and we saw a couple chatting with a group of friends. Great. Snatch the children right in their parents' faces. And they were so small… They couldn't be older than four or five, their little eyes sweet and sparkling in their innocent faces. They seemed to trust us completely and undoubtedly. Alec took their little hands and said,

"Our dog just had babies. They are tiny, tiny, tiny and adorable. Do you want to see them? We could even give you one, if you want."

No one could have suspected such a smile, such a voice. No one could have said no. The children easily allowed us to lead them. We looked at the parents, wishing they would turn around and see we were taking their children. They did not disappoint us. We enjoyed a brief second of their horror before we disappeared, each one with a child in the arms. We didn't actually go too far, only behind a nearby alley, and we could hear the scandal and people calling the kids' names. The children, when they heard their names, tried to go back, but it was too late. We took a child each and bit them. The blood flowed effortlessly through mine's flesh, and she barely made a sound while I drained her. It tasted blissfully sweet, just as expected. Sadly, they ran out way too quickly, and soon we could only cradle their lifeless corpses. We left them there, in the alley, and hid to see the parents' reaction when they finally found their children. When they did, we heard their cries and screams and even stole a glance at their horrified, pained faces. I was rather pleased with our day; this last trick would contribute to the rumours we were planting.

Just as planned, a couple of days later the whispering started. Killing those children proved to be more useful than we thought, because the people we had convinced said they'd seen the redheaded demon on the very night the kids died, so it all ended up looking as if that apparition was the murderer. Perfect.

Best was, absolutely no one in the castle suspected us at all. When the rumours reached us, they were absolutely believed, at least by the guard. No one had actually told the Trio, but by the stern expression of their faces we could guess they already knew. However, Chelsea seemed wary, and during one of our conversations she told me she feared that the whole story was made up.

"I'm afraid someone's planning this whole thing to bring her down. And I'm afraid I might be next."

"No, Chelsea, I do not think anyone is plotting against you," I said, trying to reassure her. Alec and I had decided that once we had Aleida out of the game Chelsea would be easy to neutralize without having to hurt her. At least, that was my hope.

"Of course someone is. This isn't coincidence."

"Well, perhaps not coincidence, but have you even considered that the stories might be true? What if Aleida _is_ doing all these things? Exposing us?"

"Oh no! Impossible! I know her; she would never do something like that. There is nothing in the world she loves more than this place, and though I admit she can be a little reckless sometimes, she wouldn't risk this life for anything in the world."

"Hm."

"Please, Jane, believe me. Someone is conspiring. Someone envious and full of jealousy." She sighs, exasperated, and fidgets with a locket that hangs from her neck. "You know what? I think I will investigate this myself. Because if the Trio hears everything they won't give her time to explain herself; they'll destroy her as a precaution. And that would be so unfair! Yes: I will find out everything."

Now I was really worried. Chelsea was quite smart, and she would have taken no time in discovering that it was actually my brother and me behind the whole thing. Therefore, before she could actually form a plan I intervened. "All right, Chelsea, let's do this," I said. "Don't you worry about anything; leave it all to me. I will do my best to find out if there is some plot going on, though I assure you there is none. I will tell you every single thing I hear about her, I promise, and if I hear anything strange I will get every single piece of information. After all, no one can refuse to do anything _I _say." My eyes twinkle and she shudders but smile. She has already seen me in action and she know how effectively I can persuade people to talk.

"Thanks, Jane," she said, her arms around me. "After Aleida, you're my best friend."

I was well aware of that. And the _after_ was soon going to disappear.


	12. Crush Crush Crush

**Hey, guys, what's up? I'm so sorry about the delay… But, hey, congratulate me, I saved my school year ! Welcome, Junior Year ! I'm so, so happy to be finally free after six months of the purest anguish. Now I've got two months of freedom ahead of me and I promise I'll update soon.**

**Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Crush Crush Crush**

The plan seemed to be working. Aleida was soon summoned by the Trio to explain the rumours that circulated about her. Through Chelsea, who still thought innocently that I was trying to find out if there was a conspiracy against her best friend, we learned that Aleida was clueless about who could be behind the stories, and not only that, she was scared. The mental suffering we were inflicting on her was a side effect we did not expect, and therefore a nice surprise.

The villagers kept their word and spread every single thing we ordered them to. When we considered they'd done enough, we dispatched them. But despite how our plans were developing I noticed Alec was tense and worried, so I asked him why he was feeling that way.

"When He touches us, he'll know we are the ones behind everything, Jane. How could we not think of that? Aro has full access to our minds and the moment he realizes the conspiration is ours he will kill us."

I looked straight into Alec's eyes and held his hands. "Don't you worry about that. I'll show you what to do."

The point was, over the years I had seen myself in the need of learning a way to hide my thoughts from Aro, because I couldn't risk him seeing what I felt for… oh, never mind. What mattered here was that I had a few years of practice on deceiving the master mind reader, which now proved more than useful as I taught my brother how to shield himself. When he asked me how I had developed the technique I evaded him.

"It's just that, well, you have to be prepared in case anything happens, see now how it's helping and-"

"Jane, stop. You know you cannot fool _me_. You did it because of Him, so he couldn't see how very much in love you are." I looked down. "There you go. But why are you afraid of letting him know? Don't you always talk about how magnanimous and comprehensive he is? About how necessary you are to him? Then why can't you tell him how you feel?"

"Because… because I …"

"Because you know he doesn't love you back. You know you're wasting your time and your beauty but you don't want to admit you know it. This isn't the Jane I know. My sister would never allow herself to be stepped on like this. Forget him, Jane, can't you see how much he's hurting you?"

"Alec, please, stop. Stop. He's my first love. My only love."

"That's why I'm saying this. I will not allow anyone to make you feel less than the absolute queen you are." He hugged me. "Don't you see you're the only thing I have? In the years we have lived, we have lost and won again and again and again, but the one thing that has always remained ours is each other. You're my twin sister, we're halves of a whole, if you suffer I suffer. Our strength lies in our confidence and our independence from everyone else. This love is crushing you, making you weak. Don't let it happen, Jane, please don't. You truly are the only thing I have."

"I promise I won't. But that doesn't mean that it's turned out to be quite useful to be lovesick." I smiled at the end and managed to make him smile, too. Things would improve after this whole situation was over.

And they seemed to improve, even before we were done. One evening, Aro called me to his study. He didn't do this very often, and I wondered if he had somehow found out about our schemes. But when he saw me, he smiled.

"I do not know what you have been doing, Janette, that you come to meet me with such a worried face. But there is nothing to fear, I'm not going to accuse you of anything or even ask you what mischief is in that conscience of yours," he patted my cheek. "Jane, I need your advice."

"Mine?" I asked, surprised.

"Absolutely. This is important, and you are probably the one being I trust in the entire world." I bowed and curtsied slightly. "I'm sure you have heard the rumours concerning Aleida," he said finally.

"Yes, Master."

"You don't like her, do you?"

"Well, I …"

"Do you?"

"No, Master. But I assure you I am not the only one."

He laughed again. "I know, I know. That's why I called you. Your disliking of her, combined with your intelligence and, why not, your feminine intuition, will give me what I need. Tell me, Jane, do you think all these rumours about Aleida are true?"

I considered that for a moment. What could be the right answer to that? If I said yes too quickly, he would know that I knew something and that I was either keeping that information or plotting against her. If I said no, he would get suspicious, too, given that I had just admitted I didn't like her. After thinking for a minute I finally spoke.

"I think she's capable of doing it, Master. Whether she _did_ do all these things or not, I don't know, but that she _could_, I'm sure of."

It comforted me that I wasn't actually lying to him. I would have hated that, deceiving my Master more than was necessary. But when I really considered the question I realized how possible it was that she had done everything we had set up. I allowed myself a little self-congratulating smile.

There was a silence after I spoke. Aro looked thoughtful, more serious than I'd ever seen him, and it was a while before he addressed me again. "Very good, kid," he said. "Go now. You have been very helpful. Like always."

I bowed and turned around to leave, but before I could move he stopped me. He made me face him again and leaned down. Ever so softly, his lips brushed mine.

"You are my little sunbeam," he whispered.

For a split second, it seemed that my heart would beat again.

The next few days were peaceful and quiet. There was very little to do except wait for more results and Aleida's fall. Then the unexpected, the unthinkable, the entire hell fell over me one sunny morning.

"Jane, could you come, please? I would like to talk."

It was Aleida. She looked at me peacefully, a soft smile on her face.

_This isn't good,_ I thought. _Go back, Jane, go back, this cannot be good_. Still, I went with her and we walked to the garden.

"So?" I asked after a few minutes of silence. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Um, maybe... maybe about your gorgeous little plan to bring me down?"

"What?"

"Don't think I don't know about your little plot against me, Jane. Oh, I have found all about it. So moving, Janie."

This wasn't happening. This just couldn't be happening. "I have no idea what you mean, Aleida."

"Of course you do, you little bitch. I always knew it was you behind the rumours. I didn't know how to prove it, until I heard you that day, talking to Aro and playing sweet. You were so tactful, careful not to say anything compromising. And then he praised you… and kissed you. That's when I knew you had started it all. You are in love with him."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are. And that's why you want to crush me. You know that now he prefers me over you and you're scared I might steal him from you, so you are trying to get me out of the way."

"Obviously not, Aleida. I want you out of the way because, in case you haven't noticed yet, _everyone_ wants you out of the way, because _everyone _hates you, absolutely everyone. You think I'm scared of you? Me, scared of a piece of rubbish like you? How could I possibly be scared of someone who sleeps with some loser like Demetri? For your information, he tried to make a move for me first, and the only reason he's with you is because I turned him down. You are only a lame consolation prize for the things I dump. You could never compete with me."

All of a sudden, she held both my hands as tight as she could.

"What the hell are you doing?" I roared. "Let me go!"

But she wouldn't. I began one of my worst rounds of torture ever, but she still wouldn't let go. Instead, she closed her eyes as if concentrating very hard on something and held my hands even tighter. Then I felt a kind of dizziness, and everything around me became blurry. I fought as desperately as I could against the sensation, but in the end I had to close my eyes. When I was able to open them again, it wasn't the garden anymore, but the shabby street of a village I remembered only too well. So this was time travelling.

"Oh, Jane, so you know where we are?" said Aleida in a mockingly sweet voice. I turned to her furiously, and released the full strength of my talent. To my horror, nothing happened. She smiled cruelly before continuing. "No, Janette, your little trick does not work here. It's the past. You couldn't do that in the past. You are completely in my power now, and believe me, I'm going to make you feel every angle of it."

She touched me again and I didn't know if it was more time-travelling or simply vampire speed, but soon I found myself in the one place I had never wanted to be again. The miserable little house of my childhood. I could feel we were in a past before that, a past before Alec and I were born. It all came in a succession of little explosions.

Flash.

My father beating my mother while she was carrying us. She curled herself around her huge stomach, protecting us from our father's wrath.

Flash.

The same scene, but now there were two baskets pushed against a wall, a wailing bundle in each of them.

"A girl!" howled my father as he hit my mother again. I recognized his drunken voice.

"But there's a boy, too," she whispered. "A strong, beautiful boy. You have an heir, Santino."

"But the other one is a girl! A stupid girl. There's nothing in this world more useless than a girl. She'll be just as annoying as you, I'm sure." He hit her once more and kicked one of the baskets across the room. The cries inside it became impossibly louder. I winced, knowing who was inside that basket.

Flash.

I was twelve. My mother was recovering from an almost child my father had killed by beating her up, so I was the one in charge of the house. As I went to buy groceries I noticed there was a party going on in one of the houses. I discreetly glanced in that direction and saw that they celebrated the birthday of one of the most popular girls in town, a girl more or less my own age. When her mother realized I was looking, she closed the door. Of course, there were no party invitations for us, the weird children, the phenomenon kids.

"Poor, poor Jane," came Aleida's voice from behind. "No one has ever wanted you, ever. Your father despised you because you were a girl, you had no friends because you were a freak. Now, who is the one that everyone hates, huh?"

"I tortured that girl and her mother to death, the night my brother and I got our revenge," I said through gritted teeth.

"Oh, I know. What about these?"

Flash.

Alec and I, captured and separated. All the tortures we were put through, one by one, until the last detail. The eyes of those guards and judges, filled with pleasure as I screamed. And here it is: me alone in my cell, and the iron door opened and two priests came in. They approached me slowly, savouring my terror. My vampire self watched the little girl hide her face and curl in a ball, and watched also as the men's eyes dripped lust and desire. When their disgusting hands finally came in contact with my skin I cried. They laughed and one of them held my arms as the other began touching me under the already torn gown I was wearing. I writhed and shook, and even though I now could recall how slowly, painfully I'd made them die, I still wanted to cover my ears and look away and scream. Yet the horror of the memories and my defencelessness held me frozen in place.

Then the bishop arrived. The two priests looked up, but did not let me go. Maybe they thought they would only have to share. The bishop began to reprimand them; did they really mean to perpetrate the infernal union with a servant of the Devil? Corrupt their bodies with that of a sinner? And me, most sinful witch, wasn't it enough to pollute my soul with my very own brother, that I sought to drag these sons of God to perdition, too? Sinning in prison, where I should be praying and trying to find redemption in the Lord's eyes. I was punished with twenty lashes. When the holy bishop tied me to get my penitence, his hands lingered on my waist a second too long, holding me a centimetre too close to him. The lashes came and two days after that the burning.

Flash.

Back to the street. This past was after our revenge: there was barely a street at all. Marks of the flames are quite notorious, as well as destroyed houses on both sides. Aleida and I looked at each other without a single word. She knew she'd hurt me beyond any limit, maybe she could even see the desperation in my eyes that was almost becoming madness. The past, that past that I'd been trying to run from for so long was back as if it had never been gone in the first place. Seeing myself and my brother so meaningless in the world, two lost children abandoned to be played with, was like an acid that burned its way to the very core of who I was. Even Aleida couldn't find something to say. Then everything was blurry again until I found myself safely back in the present of the garden, in Volturi land.

I was so grateful to see the familiar surroundings that I almost fell to my feet in relief, but I had something more important to do: I looked at Aleida and unleashed the strongest, most powerful current of torture I had ever produced. While I usually only felt a tickling now I had a sensation of burning, so powerful was the energy that exploded. In no time I had her on the grass, rolling and writhing, and though at first she tried to play proud I was finally able to break her into long, piercing screams. I knew that people in the castle would know what was going on, but I also knew they wouldn't mind.

It went on for quite a while. Then I stopped; after all I wanted her to be alive and sane for the next part of what was waiting for her, because, of course, this she would pay with more than her life. Unsteadily, she got on her feet and as soon as she was within my reach I slapped her across the face. After that she walked away and as soon as she could not see me I turned around and escaped, too. I went to my orchids, which were growing beautifully under my care and now provided me with the perfect hiding place. I couldn't see anyone, talk to anyone. I slipped under the bushes, curled into a ball, and just let pain take over. In two minutes fifteen years of trying had become nothing and I was back to zero I don't know how long I stayed there; I had lost all sense or concept of time. No one looked for me, anyway, so it didn't really matter.

When I was finally ready to face the world again, I had a new plan. No one could hurt me without paying it a thousand times, and this wouldn't be the exception. However, now I wouldn't be able to work alone, or only with my brother, and the plan we already had wouldn't be enough, either. I needed something bigger, something she couldn't possibly survive. I went into the Hall and then found just the person I was looking for in a hallway.

"Demetri, darling…"


	13. Death Jump

**Hello! Ok, hate me, I deserve it. I took too long. But blame it all on Twitter****, Tumblr, and yesterday's live streaming of the Harry Potter premiere. It's almost over! *sobs*.**

**Anyway… please review!**

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**Enjoy!**

**XOXO**

**Death Jump**

I didn't have anything specific in mind when I approached Demetri. I just figured it would be better to have as many people as possible under my influence rather than Aleida's, plus the fact that, since he was her lover, he was something I'd be stealing away from her. That idea gave me quite a bit of pleasure.

Surprisingly enough, it wasn't even a bit difficult to lure him back to me: it took only a couple of smiles and no more sarcastic comments to have him wrapped around my finger. At first I suspected, seeing how manipulable he was I feared he was Aleida's puppet, but soon I proved otherwise. He was nice, loyal and even fun, and sometimes I felt a little bit guilty for not seeing him as more than a tool. Sometimes.

There hadn't been any noise at all after what Aleida and I did to each other that awful day. There was no way anyone could have missed her screams, yet no one asked me anything about it. And apparently no one told the Trio, either, or if anyone did, they never summoned me. I knew almost everyone hated her, and I suppose that if I'd asked for help to hurt her they would have agreed. Still, this was something I wanted to fix on my own, a wound that was too deep and too personal to share: even when I told Alec what had happened he told he me would back off, given that this was my revenge to get. I thought about going to Aro, too, but for some reason I lacked the courage. Perhaps I feared he would side with her instead. What intrigued me was that she hadn't gone to him, either. I had Demetri get the information and apparently she knew that what she had done to me was worse than what I did, so complaining could backfire against her. Well, it pleased me to know that I was once again on top, with her fearing me and finally aware of how superior I was.

This new revenge, the second big one in my life, was more carefully planned than anything else I'd ever done. What could bring her down so thoroughly, unquestionably, irreparably, that there was no space for a coming back? I pondered for about a week or two, during which the tension was palpable in the air. It got to the point where I couldn't stand being in the castle anymore and preferred to wander around the city and nearby towns to at least try to relax.

The light came one morning while I was watering my orchids. I saw the answer to my problem with a clarity that was as simple as terrifying. The very second I realized what I had to do waves of panic and horror washed over me. I couldn't do that. Not _that_. There had to be another way, any other way, whatever. Maybe… maybe I could make _her_ do it, somehow, trick her into it, seducing her into it… No, she was way too smart for that and she would certainly be extra careful now that the odds were again on my side. It had to be me who did the whole thing; there was simply no other way.

But it was a terrible, terrible thing to do. I didn't have the courage. I had seen it once, and that had been enough. It was cruelty beyond any limit and certainly the one most punished of all crimes. I couldn't even think of what would happen if I got caught; that one idea would incapacitate me out of pure terror.

As if all that wasn't enough there was another obstacle: how could I be sure _it_ would accuse her? I could create the evidence but I couldn't figure out how to make it point at her. And there was no room for flaws in this terrible plan of mine; I already knew I'd never be quite safe again, or at least for a long, long time, I would have to be overly careful with my thoughts for the rest of eternity to not be detected and the danger would be permanent. To make sure all those problems were worth it, I had to eliminate her with one single blow.

What finally gave me the courage was the idea that she might be planning just this same thing against me, she was totally capable of that, and between her head or mine… well, the choice was obvious. And since I was going to do it, I had to do it thoroughly, with the perfection I was used to working with. I slowly went through the obstacles I could find and figured out a way to solve them. I was glad to see a realistic scheme begin to form.

Unfortunately, this search for flawlessness took me down an unpleasant path.

"Good evening, Demetri."

"Why, hello, Jane." I smiled, and he believed it. "You going hunting tonight?"

"No, I don't think so. I'd like to stay home and relax."

"Is that so? Well, in that case… if it's ok, if you don't mind… I could keep you company."

As he said this, he tentatively reached out to touch my hair. I wanted nothing more than to slap his hand, but I forced myself to look down and smile like a little girl.

"That would be nice," I said. His face lit up and then I asked the key question. "But what about Aleida? She will see us and I really do not want to fight with her again and…"

"No. She won't be here, she said she wanted to hunt in the north. We will be safe."

"Oh, in that case…" I trailed off suggestively.

"I'll look for you as soon as she leaves," he promised. Encouraged by my perfectly acted seduction, he leaned forward and pecked me on the cheek. Thanks to some strange miracle he didn't notice how tightly clenched my fists were.

The moment he disappeared I went to look for Felix. He was one of my best friends and I knew I could ask him for help without any explanation.

"Felix, could you make sure Demetri has something to do tonight that he can't pull out of…?"

Nightfall came and with it the inescapable certainty of what I was going to do. Demetri had promised Aleida would be north and I finally had a clear, concrete plot in mind. I didn't know how I would do it, but I knew I would, anyway. Just like so many other ugly things I'd done before. There was no reason to panic.

I went once more through my terrible plan with my brother (that he wasn't taking part didn't mean that he wasn't supporting and advising me) to check for flaws. There didn't seem to be any: Aleida would be north and I would try to stay close to her, never making contact, never being noticed, but seeing exactly which places she visited so my trap was believable. What I wanted to do was to cause the damage in exactly the place she'd been, so there would be no doubt it had been her. Being with Demetri had the purpose that if I was later asked where I'd been that night, I had spent enough time with him to be cleared of any doubt.

The moment of my 'date' with Demetri finally arrived and he punctually picked me up from my rooms and took me to the garden. It was actually fun, and I felt sorry for him, for the authenticity of his feelings. But what truly hurt me was that whenever I looked at him I couldn't shake the feeling that I was looking into some kind of mirror. Everything would be so easy if love just didn't exist.

We lay on the grass and chatted. After some time he leaned over me and began shyly pecking at my face –forehead, cheeks, and brushing my lips ever so softly. As he saw I didn't protest his hand slowly made its way to my waist. _Dammit, Felix, where are you? _I thought. _I kind of like him, but I'm so not going any further with him. Please!_ I was growing more and more desperate by the second, and pretending to like him grew impossibly difficult. Just when I was about to add Felix to my black list he appeared in the distance calling Demetri's name. After a lot of insistence on Felix's side and a lot of cursing on Demetri's, I was finally free to leave and head for the area where I knew Aleida was.

It didn't take me long to find her; the guard had specific hunting ranges and thanks to Demetri and Chelsea I had a clear idea of the areas she liked. After a few minutes I caught her scent and spotted her long red hair and then she was lost. I had more practice in hiding and going unnoticed than she had, so I had no problem with observing her carefully without her even suspecting.

It took me a couple of hours to find exactly what I needed, where and when I needed it. Just a minute after Aleida's figure vanished I went for the key of this awful project of mine. The child, a little girl, no older than three or four watched me with curiosity as I approached her. I looked around to see if her parents were near, and when I found no one I felt a fresh wave of anger towards the humans. Irresponsible people, how could they leave their daughter alone in the darkness just like that? Didn't they know that she was young and defenseless? They had brought her to this world; it was their responsibility to protect her from people like… like… ah, like me.

Still, they were giving me the chance I wanted and I managed to make contact with the little girl. I wore a red veil around my head; in the darkness the difference between the fabric and my real hair was virtually inexistent, so all the memories her young mind would have, should she keep any at all, would be of red hair, red eyes and white skin. She didn't seem to be scared at all, and even smiled when I knelt in front of her. It took me a second to speak; I had to modulate my voice and try to think of what _she_ would say.

"Hello, darling," I cooed, disgusted at the sound of my fake voice. "Oh, you are _so_ pretty… I was wondering… would you like to be even prettier?" she smiled again and nodded softly. "Wonderful. How about you come with me and I will make you very pretty and very fast so you can play with the boys in town?" she was enthusiastic and seemed to be ready for me to take her to the end of the world. "Come on, sweetheart, come with me and I will turn you into a beautiful princess."

She allowed me to take her in my arms and carry her a few meters away, near a small forest where I could hide her once it started. I placed her on the ground again and looked at her excited, pretty face under the dim moonlight. I brushed her hair away from her tiny neck, leaving her exposed. I took one final breath before doing what could be my salvation or my death sentence.

"Jane, this goes for you," I whispered. "Just wait and see."

And then I bit the child.


	14. Brick By Boring Brick

**Harry Potter. Holidays. Belly dance classes. Twitter. Pole dance classes. A determination to see every single movie there is in the world with Kristen Stewart in it. Molotov Jukebox. Stephen King's The Shining. A thousand and one excuses, but only one apology: sorry for the delay.**

**By the way, something has attracted my attention: more than once, I have been contacted by people who offer ideas for these your loyal Chronicles. Although I appreciate your good will and interest, I would love it more if you could only give me the chance to put my ideas together on my own. Have this gorgeous, amazing plotline bursting out of your fingers? Go! Write your own story! Yes you can! I don't mean to be rude, but I think this has to be clear for everyone: I won't take any ideas or contributions unless I asked for them, ok? I love you, guys, but let's give each other some space.**

**That said…**

**Long live Nymphadora Tonks!**

**Long live Remus Lupin!**

**Long live Bellatrix Black!**

**Long live Lord Voldemort!**

**Long live Severus Snape!**

**Brick By Boring Brick**

I had heard the cries of humans becoming vampires, of course I had, more than once. I knew the sound of the lost soul. This, however, wasn't just a human cry of transformation; it was a heartbreaking howl, a sob that froze your bones and went deep into your veins.

The soft voice. The soft, sweet voice of the little girl I'd just bitten that now melted in bloodcurdling screams. It was so horrible that my first impulse was to cover my ears and run far, far away, where her cries couldn't reach me. Yet I forced myself to focus: after all the damage was already done and there was no going back, not for her, not for me. I concentrated on more practical, logistical things such as, where I could hide the girl so no one would notice her screams? The whole process had taken longer than I'd expected, and I had to go back to the castle or I would raise suspicions. Should I take her with me and keep her at a reasonable distance or was it better to leave her here and come back? Her body was very small; if Alec and I had taken only two days she would be ready in perhaps only a few hours, and I couldn't risk her waking up alone and becoming a real danger to our whole secret life. Therefore I decided to take her with me.

I hid her in a nearby forest, having to squeeze the last of my courage to gag her so her screams were muffled, and also to cover her eyes, for when I came back I would be recognizable.

"There, there, my Selene," I cooed while she screamed, remembering the name of that poor witch that had been so cruelly rejected by us. _That_ would be something to trace back to Aleida; she had, after all, been Selene's right hand. If there was someone Aleida had ever loved, it was Selene. "You will soon be fine again, and we'll be together as if nothing had ever happened."

After all that, finally, I arrived home. By some strange stroke of luck, Aleida wasn't back yet, which would clear me of suspicions once the plan was unleashed and the girl found. I made sure I was seen by a few members of the guard and then I went straight for my brother. I was exhausted, and emotionally drained. The moment he saw me, without any question or any word at all, he hugged me as tightly as he could.

"Poor darling. That must have been horrible."

"It was terrible, Alec, terrible. It's terrifying, and it feels so awful."

"I can imagine. Do you think this will work?"

"It had better."

"Yeah," he smiled softly. "When will she be ready?"

"I'm not sure. A few hours, I suppose."

"Let me go with you. I hate the idea of your being alone there."

"No. I do not want you to be more involved in this than you have to. I know it's a foolish thing to say, I have already tangled you too much, but please, please, let me protect you. If this is discovered-"

"Don't even think about it."

"If this is discovered I must go down alone. I am the only guilty one."

Alec hugged me. "You have always gotten away with everything, Janette. Don't you worry."

"Thanks. Watch out for me while I'm gone. Wish me luck."

He kissed me on the lips and hugged me again.

I returned to the hiding place five hours after I'd left the little girl there. Just as I'd thought, she was already in the last spasms of transformation. Well, at least it had been quick. When I untied her, she instinctively held me and sobbed into my chest. That I had not expected. I didn't have the slightest idea how to comfort her. I mean, how do you soothe a four-year-old child who has just been turned into a vampire to satisfy someone else's need for revenge? I patted her shoulder awkwardly and attempted to caress her hair until she calmed down. What came after that was just as horrifying. She put her hand on her throat and began weeping dryly. Of course, she was so thirsty.

"Wait here," I told her, still in my Aleida voice. "I will get something that will make you feel better. Promise you won't move from here. If you do, I won't be able to help you. I won't be long. Stay here, please."

I had no idea if she was even able to register what I was saying, but it was my only hope. I ran with no direction, guided only by my disturbed sense of smell. I snatched the first human I saw, broke his neck and returned to the child. By some strange miracle, she was still there, just as I'd told her. Now I suppose she was too scared and confused to move, and she wasn't in the slightest aware of her new condition. But in that moment the only thing that mattered was cutting the human's throat, with my own nails out of hysteria, and making her drink the still warm blood. She did so eagerly, and the effects were immediate: she stopped shaking, calmed down, and consequently I relaxed, too.

I tried to push out of my mind the inescapable, nightmarish sight developing before my eyes: a four-year-old child drinking human blood. Instead, I focused on the rest of her, her appearance, that though just as heartbreaking was less horrifying. She was a moving vision. Still blindfolded because I was now much more recognizable, hair and clothes stained with dirt and blood, tiny tiny tiny, the size of a fairy, small even for me, and I was already undersized. Blond hair filled with leaves and earth and quite thin. This was going to be really hard for both of us. I bit my lip, forcing myself to keep in mind that the worst part was over; the one most difficult step that could -would, if discovered- get me killed was already taken and there was no going one for neither of us.

"Listen now, sweetie prettie," I said in that disgusting, sickly Aleida voice. "Now you are strong and beautiful, more than you were yesterday. Can you feel it?" she nodded. "Well, how about we go for a little walk and you can see all the new pretty things you can do?" she brought her little hand to her neck and moved uncomfortably. Naturally, she was still thirsty. "Yes, we'll see to that, too. Ready?"

"Yes."

I took her in my arms and ran. _Everything is fine, Selene,_ I whispered,_ everything is fine again_. The whisper was soft enough to pass as a talking-to-myself thought, but loud enough to register in her memories, the memories I knew would be checked the moment she was discovered and caught.

I stopped when we reached a clearing. She was calm and silent; having already drunk blood she wasn't as anxious, and when I finally did what I planned she would be slightly more controlled, or less altered, at least. I patted her on the back and spoke to her again.

"All right, sweetie, listen to me." how I hated this voice. There's something I need to do, but I won't take long. Please wait for me _here_. Don't move, stay in this place and I'll be back in a flash, ok?"

She nodded. As if I didn't know that just two miles away there was a small village. As if I didn't catch the scent of that people and it made my own throat pool with venom. As if I didn't know she was a thirsty newborn _and_ a child.

"Stay here, my love. I'll be back soon."

Very, very carefully, I set her on her feet, right before me, facing the field and the close village. Just as carefully, I kissed her cheek . Even more carefully, I removed the blindfold.

And then I set her loose.

**Hello again! I take advantage of this space to promote the most perfect band on Earth: Molotov Jukebox. With the amazing, sexy voice of Natalia Tena (Tonks in Harry Potter), this six-piece British band is ready for, in their own words, "world domination through dancing and sex." And believe me, they sure as hell can take over.**

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	15. Explosion

**Explosion**

Of course I knew she would run away. Of course I knew she would smell human blood and wouldn't wait for me; thirst would be too strong. But that was the plan: make it seem like a foolish slip, leaving a newborn on their own and believing they would behave and obey. It was a mistake that an inexperienced vampire like Aleida could make.

Now there was truly no going back. The child had left and I'd lost track of her. It was broad daylight, and I would perhaps be seen by someone and remembered as Jane and not Aleida. The force of this plan was fully unleashed and all I had left was crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. When I returned home it surprised me to find that I had only taken two hours. It seemed an eternity to me.

I didn't look for Alec, this time I needed to be alone. I needed to be alone to process the fact that if I was caught I would be executed without a second thought, and I would drag Alec along with me. A random thought made me love my talent even more when I remembered that I usually tortured sentenced ones before they died, and I would have a torture-free death because I couldn't use my powers on myself. Well, something good to get out of this.

I sighed. I was being very negative. What if, after all, nobody ever caught me, they incriminated Aleida -now, that was a chance for torture that I wouldn't miss for anything in the world-, and they got her out of my way? It could happen, too! That was the whole point of everything I was doing, eliminating her forever! _This has to go well, Jane, now stop thinking nonsense and be optimistic_. I got on my feet and went back to the castle –I had spent the last two hours sitting on the grass of the Volturi lawns-, feeling more confident and less scared than before. Come what may.

It wasn't long before hell broke loose. It was very subtle at the beginning, just a few rumors, here and there, maybe, perhaps, somebody heard that somebody said that somebody thinks somebody saw a strange creature in the village. Alec and I had to pretend that I had no idea about anything, that we were as confused and clueless as everyone else, and that added even more unnecessary stress to our live, already perpetually panicked. We let the rumors go on without intervening, until Aro himself decided to send Demetri out to investigate. He didn't take long; the story was spreading, and fast. He returned soon and entered the Hall with a barely concealed worried expression on his face.

"Masters," he bowed his head.

"What news do you bring?" asked Caius.

"Masters, I have investigated and... following the trail, scents and rumors, well, I'm afraid I must confirm to you the existence of an immortal child"

Audible gasps echoed around the room. _One, two, breathe. Do not look guilty._ I fought the urgency to look around for my brother; any movement could be suspicious. The Trio tensed visibly and Aro demanded details.

"People claim they have seen a little girl running around faster than any child of that age should. They swear they can see her skin glow like jewels under the sun. They say –they say half a village has disappeared in only two days."

Fury invaded the Trio's expressions. The symptoms were clear: it was definitely a new case of immortal children.

"She has been sighted in this area, hasn't she?"

"Yes, Master."

"Then her creator can't be far away. Guard! Listen! We will go to the last consequences to find out who is behind this. The penalty for such a crime is, as you know, death. Should it be discovered that the creator is someone inside this Hall, may God have mercy on him, because we will not. Law will be applied with full force, no exceptions. The moment the child is brought here, I will look inside her thoughts. We trust you, guard, and we hope none here has that fault on his shoulders."

"Now get to work, everybody!" commanded Marcus. "Find that kid right now! "Do anything you must, but have that child here by dawn. Go! Right away! Find her!"

Demetri, Felix, and a couple of others left immediately. The remaining ones looked at each other, everyone trying to figure out if the creator was there, and if so, who it was. Everyone but me and Alec who, now that the circumstances allowed us to show fear, were holding hands and just staring into each other's eyes. If this went well, we would have a masterstroke. If we didn't… well, we wouldn't. But we hoped. This one we had to win.

Search went on for only a couple of days. The problem was too close to our home to allow any delay in the delivery of results. Soon the search party returned, and they didn't come unsuccessful. Felix carried in his arms a small bundle, wrapped in his own cloak; the little thing twitched and whimpered in fear. The sound of her voice was unmistakable: they had found my girl. A loud silence fell on everyone in the Hall as they made their way to the presence of the Trio.

"You found her."

"Yes, Master."

"Well done. Her creator?"

"Still unknown, Master. She was created and then left on her own."

"Such irresponsibility… What's the damage?"

"She swept half the village. The rest… well, we had to eliminate all memories of her presence, Master."

"You acted well. Any direct witness must be eliminated. It's the only way. Now, let's see if the creature has any recollection of her creator. Let us see her."

Felix placed the child on her feet and removed the cloak. The moment she opened her eyes, her little face lit up. She smiled, opened her tiny arms, and ran freely. As she moved, she spoke. One word.

"Mama!"


	16. Better Than Revenge

**Better Than Revenge**

"Mama!"

The entire place was too horrified to do anything but freeze as my girl, my immortal child, said this terrible word as she held out her little arms for Aleida, whose face turned into a mask of pure panic. When people began to come alive again they exchanged looks and quiet whispers, Alec came closer and held my hand; no one was paying any attention to us at all: everything was Aro, Aleida, or the girl.

"Explain yourself," said Aro coldly as he looked at Aleida.

"Master, I … I don't understand, I have no idea, I didn't do it!" she said, her voice as scared as her eyes. "Really, I didn't, -here!" she held out her hand. "One touch, and you will see I am telling the truth. Please, Masters, believe me, I-"

"Enough. It is not you I need, girl, I know your tricks only too well. It's _her_ I want." Aro gestured at the child. "Bring her to me."

Aleida looked at the girl, clearly reluctant to approach her, let alone touch her.

"Come on, Aleida, you take her. She definitely seems to know and trust you."

That was true: the little girl's eyes were wide and trusting as she saw the apparently familiar features, and even a ghost of a smile appeared on her lips when she heard Aleida's voice. In the middle of the crisis I allowed myself a self-congratulatory thought. Had I really been that good, impersonating my worst enemy? Yeah.

When the girl was finally face to face with Aro the room froze again, and when his hands took her tiny one there was actually a gasp around the Hall. The contact lasted a minute or so; a minute where we all held our breath, and Aleida looked like she would faint at any moment. Aro frowned, his eyes closed in concentration, and the girl just smiled, unaware of the seriousness of the situation around her, moreover, that she was the cause of it. People's eyes were fixed either on the floor or in her cherry-red eyes, the eyes no one her age should have. When Aro's eyes finally opened the tension increased, if possible.

"What do you have to say, Aleida?" said Aro in a neutral voice

"Master… Master, I swear! I swear I don't know her, I don't have anything to do with her! I didn't know she existed until this moment! Please, Master, Masters!"

The child looked at her with an expression that could only be considered wounded. Aleida's words had hurt her. Aro didn't seem to notice, but I knew him well enough to see that he had registered it.

"That is all very well, Aleida," said Aro, and she breathed for the first time. "Still… your explanation does not tell me why this creature recalls the sound of your voice so accurately."

Aleida was at a loss for words.

"Moreover," he continued, "I fail to understand why she remembers your hair. Your face."

Everyone gasped. Aleida looked horrified beyond anything in the world and, not far from her, Chelsea had just the same expression. She looked from Aro to Aleida to the child and back, wanting very much not to believe but terrified of the evidences.

"I have seen this child's thoughts," said Aro gravely, now addressing all of us. "She recalls the entire process of transformation, but also a little before that. She remembers a sing-song voice," –eyes flicked to Aleida and back to Aro- "promising her beauty and strength. Promising to turn her into a princess," he snorted quietly. "She remembers the scent of sandal," –eyes back to Aleida, who held her shaking head between her hands. Everyone knew that her clothes were perfumed with sandal-. "She remembers red, red in the head."

"Please…" she wailed.

"And she also remembers… she has the memory of the woman whispering to herself. Saying, _Jane, this goes for you. Just wait and see._"

At the mention of that Aleida quickly raised her head and fixed her stare on me.

"It was her!" she screamed, pointing at me. "It was her!"

All of a sudden she had launched herself at me with murderous energy.

"It's you! You are doing this! It's your child, not mine! Confess! You did it! You! You!"

Felix was immediately with me, pulling Aleida away and pinning her arms behind her back.

"Oh, can't you see?" she cried, shaking like a wild animal. "She hates me! She schemed and plotted against me, she and her witch brother! Master, please, I beg you, check their thoughts and you will see that I'm innocent!"

I looked at her from behind Alec –who had stood between us to protect me- and played my only card. Wishing with all my heart that she wouldn't or couldn't do it, I challenged.

"Well then, if you are so sure it's me who has done all this, take us back in time and prove it. Show me to them, kidnapping and transforming this child."

"You bet I will! Masters, let me show you, let me show you this monster doing this horrible thing!"

I was lost, I knew it. One look at truth and I was dead. Aleida grabbed my hand, she could have crushed it with the strength of her grip, then Aro's, and closed her eyes. The deep frown of concentration showed in her face despite the desperation, her entire body shook and she bit her lip so hard I thought she would cut through it. Seconds, and then minutes went by, and nothing happened. Aro and I looked at each other, then at her, then at everyone else. Finally, Aleida let go of our hands and, with a terrible cry, fell to the marble floor.

"I- I can't. Not right now. This is too much for me. Just- give me a little time and… and I'll show you. Please, just let me recover, I …"

"Can't prove yourself, can you, Aleida?" I said now, more confident after seeing her strongest weapon fail her so miserably. She looked at me with fire in her eyes and tried to attack me again.

"Calm yourself, Aleida," said Caius slowly, "or we'll see ourselves in the need of executing you only because of the riot you're causing."

"While Aleida recovers," began Aro, "let's talk, Jane. She argues that it's not her but you who did this," he gestured at the child, who had sat at Marcus' feet and now looked at us with confusion and fear and thirst, "and since apparently she can't prove her innocence, maybe you can prove yours."

I held out my hand and he took it between his two. I breathed and relaxed, knowing this would require every single bit of strength and concentration: a memory that had affected me so deeply, and upon which my life and Alec's depended right now, was anything but easy to hide; even Aleida, who was innocent, hadn't had enough strength to save herself, now me, loaded with all the guilt in the world… But I focused hard: I could die, but I couldn't do that to my brother, I couldn't drag him along with me. I fought with all my strength, all the resistance I was able to draw out of my fear, and I hid every memory I had. I could almost feel him inside my brain, reaching inside dark corners and secrets. I kept fighting. Sooner than I'd expected, it was over.

"Very well, Jane," he said. "I cannot find anything to incriminate you. And given that you have no memory of the girl, and the girl has no memory of you, either, I suppose you are innocent."

"Oh, please!" screamed Aleida.

"Jane doesn't have memories of any of this," he began, "and the girl doesn't have anything that could relate to her. You have no memories of it, either," he continued pensatively, "yet the girl seems to remember you… rather clearly, I'm afraid."

"If she's guilty," began Caius, "I think we should get it over with as soon as possible. The sentence is clear."

"No, please!"

It was Chelsea. My friend. She had finally unfrozen and was now at Aro's feet, imploring for her best friend's life.

"I know her. I've known her for years. She would never do something like that, ever. Believe me. She's innocent, I'd swear on my life that she's innocent."

"Ah, be careful with your words, child. You wouldn't want to be dragged should she be proven guilty, would you?"

Chelsea looked up, terrified, and shook her head.

"Why don't you just confess, Aleida, and spare us all this trouble?" said Alec, in an outburst of bravery.

"No, I won't," she replied, her usual pride finally returning. "I have nothing to confess. I'm innocent."

"Masters, if I may," intervened Felix. His range within our organization wasn't that high, but he was always allowed to speak when it came to trials and crimes. I knew only too well that he also detested Aleida as much as I did. He wasn't letting this chance go. "I think it would be better if we put Aleida in a, let's say, reserved place while further interrogation takes place."

Caius looked at him and smiled. So Caius disliked her, too? That was good, that was very, very good.

"Well, Felix, although your idea is very good indeed, I'm afraid there isn't much left to interrogate. My brothers, I don't know about you, but to me the proof is very clear. Aro, would you be so kind as to check the creation's mind one more time, just to make sure?"

Aleida looked like she had lost her mind. Chelsea took her in her arms while she rocked back and forth like a madwoman. Aro examined my child once more, and declared that there was no room for doubt. Aleida didn't seem to notice anymore. Aro then handed the little girl to Felix, no need for explanations. She was gone in a second, like she had never existed, poor thing. When she was destroyed I couldn't help wincing and biting my lip. She had been lost to my cause, my personal benefit. To this day, the damage I caused her is my only regret.

"It is done, then," declared Marcus. "No doubts?"

"None at all. We are afraid we must declare Aleida guilty of the crimes of transformation of a child and irresponsible handling of a newborn, knowing beforehand that such actions are strictly prohibited by our law, and are most risky to our society. The sentence is death by ripping and burning. It shall be applied immediately."

The cry that echoed in the Hall was Chelsea's; she held Aleida tightly to her body and refused to let go.

"Please, don't do that… she's all I have left… if I lose her I can't go on… please… give her time… she can prove her innocence… take me instead… I beg you… have mercy…"

"Chelsea, enough. Give her to us. Otherwise you will be marked as accomplice and will suffer the same fate."

"I don't care! I don't care anymore."

But I did care, and so I approached her and little by little I made her let go of Aleida. It was my turn to hug and soothe her, to try and comfort her in her pain and loss. She held on tight, burying her face in my cloak. Aleida was surrounded by and then the enemy that had once turned my paradise dark became nothing more than ashes at my feet.


	17. Shattered Ice

**Shattered Ice**

I felt so strange.

I don't think I wasn't even myself, I floated, I drifted, I spent every second in a cloud somewhere far, far away. I was barely aware of my surroundings; perhaps I wasn't aware at all.

Aleida's death had struck me deeper that I could have ever thought. I had no words for the happiness and relief, the delicious and exquisite wonder of being rid of her, yet I couldn't quite bring myself to just let go and enjoy the moment. I had done something huge, something serious and monstrous, and even though I'd do it again a thousand times if I had the chance I couldn't help feeling a little tingle of something in my stomach. Not quite guilt, but there was definitely something that didn't let me fully enjoy my victory. Maybe it was the loss of the little girl, an innocent victim, a pawn in my game. Yeah, that was probably it.

I tried to refocus, and to go on with my life as if nothing had happened. I saw the others rejoice; they felt that something strange had happened there, but they didn't mind as long as Aleida was permanently out of their way. Alec seemed quite recovered too, not a trace of guilt on his face or attitude. Only Demetri and Chelsea looked upset, and with reason: Demetri and Aleida had been lovers, so I guess there was some feeling in him, he missed her or something. Their relationship has never been clear to me, so… And of course, Chelsea. Now, she was inconsolable. She had lost the last one of her clan of witches and was now convinced that she was absolutely on her own. I tried my hardest to comfort her, but I found it difficult given that I was happy for what had happened and, moreover, that I had caused it. Therefore, I felt very impotent and useless, and had the distant impression that, instead of clearing my path towards Chelsea and her friendship, it had taken us further apart.

But I carried on. I really tried to. Everyone moved forward, and so did I. Until that day. That Day.

It was a bright morning, not long after the Aleida Event had happened. Demetri found me in one of the hallways and delivered a message.

"Jane, Aro wants you to meet him in his study."

"Ok. Did he say why?"

"No."

"Oh."

I had no idea what he could want. Intrigued, I went downstairs as quickly as I could and knocked.

"Oh, Jane, there you are. Come here, my dearest."

I did as told, and sat on one of the chairs that faced his desk. He sat on the throne-like one, looking regal as always but with a touch of affection in his eyes.

"How can I help you, Master?" I asked after a minute of silence.

"I would like to chat with you. Tell me, do you enjoy the life you have right now?"

"Yes, Master, how could I not?"

"You're happy, then."

"Happier than I ever imagined."

"If you saw this life jeopardized, what would you do to save it?"

The question took me aback. I had no idea where he was going with the conversation. "Um… I … well, of course, I wouldn't give this up for the world… I'd do anything it took to protect it."

"Anything?" he asked. He seemed amused, a smile trying to fight its way to his lips.

"… Yes…"

"Anything… well I suppose that explains it."

I was getting scared now. "What does it explain, Master?"

"It explains why you fabricated a crime against Aleida, of course."

I looked up, terrified, "M-Master, w-what do you mean?"

"Jane, let's not kid ourselves. Do you really think I don't know it was you who created the immortal child? That it was you who set it all up against her?"

This was beyond horror. I wanted to die. I wanted to use my own power on myself and then die slowly. I was going to die, anyway. I still had the breath, though, to ask him.

"How did you find out?" my voice wasn't mine, nothing in my body was mine anymore; it just felt as if a stranger was moving my lips.

"During the trial. Poor you, you must have suffered so much, hiding this huge secret. I must admit, that was indeed a fine piece of concealment and concentration. But when I saw Aleida's thoughts and I said could find nothing to save her, what I did find was innocence. Her surprise and terror were pure, she only feared getting punished for something she had truly not been involved with, and I knew she had done nothing.

"But then I found the memory of what she did to you, of the time when she took you to your own past to torment you, and then I knew you had to be behind the whole mess. She hurt you terribly, in an unspeakable way, and it seemed only logical that you would seek revenge by doing something like what you actually did."

I couldn't bring myself to look him in the eye. "But…why didn't you say something?"

"Because…" and here he let out a laugh, "because I like you better than her. I was quite aware of the problems between you, it was obvious they became more serious with each second, and soon I would have to make a choice. And of course, _of course_," he held my head with both hands, "I was going to pick you. I was just waiting for an excuse to get rid of her, and Jane, you provided me with such a good one! Such intelligence, such good planning and scheming! I must say I'm impressed with your skills. Your brother helped you, didn't he?"

"Um… he… er…"

He laughed again. "Jane, do you still not see that you've absolutely gotten away with this? I will not punish you. Haven't I just said I'm proud of you? Don't answer if you don't want to, I suppose he did help you. So you did it for revenge after what she did to you?"

"Yes."

"I understand. You did right; honor is the most precious thing we have. Yet…"

"What?"

"I think sometimes you take things too seriously, Jane, and that will only make _you_ suffer."

"What do you mean?" why was I asking that question time and time again? Why did I have to be such an ignorant little girl?

"Well… Demetri and Aleida have been your greatest problems in the time you have been here, besides the shock of seeing Charlotte. But actually, they were only teasing you. Perhaps Aleida did mean you harm, but Demetri didn't, that much I can assure you. He feels grateful towards you. But whenever he makes a joke, no matter how small, you get overly upset. For example, that thing they both said about you being in love with me… you were so angry! And there was no reason at all!"

I felt a nervous rush through my veins. "No. Of course not."

I spoke as calmly as I could, trying to make it sound light, but I took a second too long. Aro stopped abruptly, and looked at me carefully.

"There was no reason at all, was there?" he asked again.

"No, Master," I insisted.

His voice and his face were serious now. When he spoke again, he seemed a different person.

"You… you are not in love with me, are you, Jane?"

"No, Master."

"Look at me and deny it."

It took all my strength to meet his gaze and repeat my lie.

"Ah, Jane. Jane, Jane, Jane. Do not be so weak, dearest one. Do not love me, because I don't love you. Not in that way. Yes, you are beautiful. Yes, you are strong. Yes, you are lethal and my most loyal element. But you will never be able to give me what I want with all my soul, the one thing I truly crave."

"Master, believe me, I can. Name anything, and I will do it, I will get it."

"No, Jane, you can't. It does not depend on you; it is because of your nature and there is no going back."

"Haven't I gone through change after change for you?" I was trying with all my strength to keep my dignity, but it was becoming increasingly hard. "I can become anything you need, and you know it."

"I do, Jane, I do, but this is beyond our power. And besides, as I've told you before, I don't want you in that way, so even if you could… you wouldn't be my first choice."

"But, _what is it_? What do you crave? If I can't give it to you myself, then I can get you someone to provide it. Please, Master, do tell me."

He looked at me as if he was seeing me for the very first time. His gaze was curious and there seemed to be the tiniest spark of wonder in his eyes. "Would you really do that for me? Would you really be willing to help me in the search of this?"

"Of course, Master." He could tell me what he wanted, and then I could find a way to be the one to give it to him –there just _had _to be a way-, and then he would be impressed and perhaps then he would finally love me and then-

"I want a child. A child of my own."

It was the fire of the stake all over again. He wanted a child. Oh, he wanted to have his own child. Why? Why did he have to want the very thing I could never, ever be able to give him? There was no way I could become pregnant, I was no longer able and no cure existed for that. For the first time in my life I hated being a vampire. I hated myself with a passion and strength and fierceness I didn't know I could feel. My frozen body couldn't give life to anything; it was no longer capable of growing and holding a baby. I was completely infertile, and would remain so forever and ever. And then Aro's words came back, sharp as a knife: _even if you could… you wouldn't be my first choice_. So I'd lose, anyway, even if I was fertile I would lose. He didn't desire me, he wouldn't take me and have me and bless me with a child of his own blood.

"Oh. I see." That was all I could manage.

"Good. Jane, I don't want you to be sad. This is just the way things are. The child I want is probably impossible to get. We can't have the things we want, but we'll go on. Don't you worry, Jane. You will always be my little sunbeam."

He patted my head like he would do to a dog or a cat, a pet. It felt horrible. The gesture had the feeling of end, so I took it as an indication to leave. When I stood up, he kissed my forehead in the most tender, fatherly, heart-shattering gesture ever.

I left, devastated, and found Chelsea almost behind the door. Her expression was horrified, and at the same time flames burned in her eyes and her body trembled.

"Chelsea, what is it?" I was surprisingly tired, but I still hated to see her in such a state.

"I- I heard you."

"What do you mean?"

"I heard you! I heard you admitting to Aro that it was you who hurt Aleida! I heard you! You killed her! You killed her!"

No. It was not possible. Surely there was a limit to the amount of suffering one should go through in a lifetime? At least in a day? There _had_ to be a limit. So much pain…

"Chelsea, please, let me explain, you don't know what she did, I couldn't-"

But I was interrupted by a growl that came from her coral lips and froze the venom in my veins. She had suddenly gone into a hysteria attack. She panted and looked at me with mad eyes. Her fury was palpable and so was her pain –she was completely devastated.

"Please, listen, I-"

"She was my best friend! My sister! You knew what she meant to me yet you- I hate you!"

"Chelsea, I beg you, just let me-"

"I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! You have got nothing on her, nothing! Not her beauty, not her powers, not her charm. She was unique, you can't compare to her!"

She looked into my eyes, calculating, and spoke slowly her next words. "I wish you had burned at the stake when you had the chance!"

That hit home. I couldn't stand one more second of anything. I couldn't think, I couldn't exist. I turned around and ran, ran as fast as I could, wishing I could fly far away and never come back. I noticed my steps were guiding me to the city. I noticed it was broad daylight. I couldn't care less.

Someone approached me just as I was leaving the castle.

"Jane?" It was Alec. Oh, Alec, my darling, how could I face him after such an enormous defeat?

"Leave me alone," I said. Was I sobbing?

"Jane, what is go-"

"Leave me alone !

"But-"

"Leave me alone !" I roared with the last drops of sanity left inside me.

Finally, I reached the street. The last clear memory I have is the diamond glitter of my skin under the sun of Volterra.


	18. Reborn

**Reborn**

_Alec's POV_

Hours passed, and she still didn't return. I would have gone with her, of course I wanted to, when I saw her running in such pain, but something told me it was a grieving for one; I shouldn't intervene. But as time went by without any sign of her, I began to worry. I knew she wanted to be alone, but I knew she couldn't be _that_alone. I mean without me, because I felt the same: much as sometimes I wanted to be on my own, I was never able to be so on my own that I didn't need her. We were only halves of a whole.

It finally became too much: I decided to look for her. Since it was still daytime, though, I had to ask for permission.

"Masters."

"Yes, Alec?"

"I would like to go out. My sister is missing and I need to find her."

"What do you mean, your sister is missing? What's the matter with Jane?" Caius had always liked her, and I knew that though he masked it he was concerned.

"I'm not sure, sir. I saw her running at top speed, and I tried to stop her, but she wouldn't listen."

"I see. Did you see where she ran to?"

"She went outside the castle, sir."

"Wait a minute," intervened Marcus. "You mean that that child is out in the city in broad daylight?"

"I'm afraid so, sir. That is why I request your permission to go looking for her, I need to find her before she does something she might regret. She seemed rather… distressed when she left."

"I'm sorry, boy," said Caius. "I know how much Jane means to you, but we cannot let you out during the day. It's enough to have already one outside. Let's just hope she remains controlled enough not to make a big mistake."

"But… please…" I hadn't wanted to show my desperation, but it seemed inevitable. "She really did not look good. I'm afraid something might happen to her. I mean, she is intelligent enough not to risk exposure, because she cares about us, but she might do something to herself. Please, let me go."

In the end they agreed. I left the castle and moved as fast as I could under the shadows. My senses were at their sharpest, but I still could not find any trace of my Jane. Deep inside, I was very scared. I had no idea what had happened to her, and the fact that she for the first time ever hadn't shared it with me worried me to no end. After combing the city a couple of times I admitted she wasn't inside Volterra and ventured further into the fields.

Finally, finally, I found her. And what I saw terrified and froze me at the same time that it made me want to cry and hug her. She was sitting on the grass, her eyes lost, rocking herself back and forth, oblivious to the world. All around her, there were mangled bodies, corpses covered in blood whose limbs were twisted at odd angles, people of all sizes and ages, lying dead under the sun. However, though her skin sparkled like a diamond her eyes were night-black, which meant she hadn't killed for thirst. No, this had been some furious mass-murder, a frenzied killing to drown some horrible feeling.

I made my way through the victims of her pain until I was by her side. Tentatively, I put my arm around her and was pleased to feel her head resting on my shoulder. She had moved, something I'd thought impossible. I hugged her tighter and she curled up like a baby. Time passed and neither of us moved, the bodies laid still all around us and no one came to disrupt our grieving. As sun began to set, she began mumbling quietly. The whole story of the hell she'd been through that day. It horrified me, and I had to use all my willpower not to go back to the castle in that very moment and set things straight with that bastard. We owed him our life, yes, but if he had saved us only to put us, to put _her,_ through this hell, I'd rather be dead, and I knew she would, too. He'd hurt her, and whoever hurt my sister killed me along.

And Chelsea… just when I'd thought my Jane had finally found someone else to trust… this. You see, sometimes I wondered if our closeness wasn't actually hurting us: we were each other's world and life, and should anything happen to one of us, the other would go through just as much agony. Then this happened. And although I could perfectly see and understand Chelsea's point and it was clear to me that she was also a victim, I couldn't help blaming her for my Jane's suffering. That friendship was broken beyond repair forever, and I doubted my sister would ever recover and trust again. So far, I have been right.

When the sun began to rise for yet a new day she stirred again. No one had come in the hours we'd been there and the people around us would soon be missed in their homes, not to mention their bodies were beginning to decay. I was glad she was on her feet before I had to move her. I took her in my arms, for no matter how strong I knew she was, she looked fragile, and I knew how tired she was. I carried her all the way to the castle, taking my time because I knew she didn't particularly want to face that reality.

"Be strong, Janette, please do. For me?"

She nodded and asked me to set her on her feet. She might feel weak, but she wasn't going to _look_ weak. We went into the castle, trying to look our best. No one noticed anything, and if they did, they didn't ask. Not even the Trio. Aro knew, of course, and it was me who had the hard time pretending. Marcus and Caius probably knew everything, too, but they were untouched. Well, maybe Caius would talk to Jane later, he liked her genuinely and perhaps that was what she needed, someone else beside me who could give her a more objective view and a new kind of support. I could only hope.

_Jane's POV_

I don't remember much about that day. Or the few ones afterwards, to be honest. It was too much to bear, even for my vampire memory, and those were recollections that I did not want to keep. When I try to look back and understand what happened to me, I see only blurs of pain. I remember my frenzied killing spree, the need to murder, the need to destroy and let go all that black energy. I remember hating everyone and everything. I remember Alec's love, his help, his care, his understanding. I remember he sent me upstairs to be undisturbed and brought me during all that time little children to feed on, risking all security measures and laws just to help me. I also remember Caius visiting me, saying that someone as strong and powerful as me shouldn't let herself be suffocated by such silly events, that Aro hadn't meant to hurt me, on the contrary, it was the best that could have happened, and that if I wanted Chelsea to pay for her words and if I wanted her out of my way (temporarily or permanently), that would get done immediately. But I felt neither strong nor powerful, though his words were the ones that stuck with me the most, and I decided to give myself sometime to heal. I went on with my life, for I couldn't afford disappearing and allowing rumors to start, or losing the power Alec and I had built with so much effort, and little by little I began to recover.

Nonetheless, no matter how Aro was all sweet and kind to me, and how I tried to correspond him with my best work as hunter, spy, torturer, and assistant, how Alec and I were again ascended, no matter how hard Chelsea and I tried to pretend the other simply didn't exist, there was a huge scar left inside me, a scar that throbbed every time I saw either of them, a scar that only seemed to calm down with the rush of electricity flowing from my mind to cause pain. When I tortured, when I fed, when I killed humans just for the vain pleasure of feeling powerful and superior, then my own feelings didn't seem so bad. I was aware, and at first worried, that I was becoming a new person, harsher, crueler, heartless and more selfish. But then I understood that that was the only way I would be able to survive, to wait until it was time to strike again, and then it all made sense and I welcomed the new me with open arms.

Having once again gone through fire, I was reborn.


	19. Ice

**Ice**

After that conversation with Aro I began paying much more attention. This new me was sharper and more curious, sure that nothing could possibly hurt her more than she'd already been hurt and therefore confident. My reformed senses soon made me see what I should have noticed a long time ago.

From time to time, something happened to Aro. He would suddenly look brighter, have more energy, be kinder to everyone. And then, just like that, the spark would die and he would act all moody and bitter for a while, then just go back to normal, then bright again and so on. I'd been too blind before to notice, but now that I had I became extremely curious. I of course couldn't follow him or spy on him the way I would have if it had been any other person, so to find out I approached my one other true friend in the castle, beside Alec: Caius. I could tell he genuinely liked me, and I liked him, too, and being part of the Trio he surely knew everything. After a few weeks of trying, he finally realized what I wanted and gave me the precious information.

"Remember what he told you about the child? That he wants a child?" he asked. I nodded. "Well, he's trying to get it."

"_What?_ But… how? Aren't vampires supposed to be unable to…"

"Women yes, Jane, but not men. Male vampires are fertile."

"_Really? _But, still, how…?"

"Well, with human women, of course. He's trying to get a human woman to have his child."

It took me a while to form my next question. When I did, it became a thousand. What about the vampire strength? I mean, back then I didn't know much about the subject, but I was sure that the amount of strength required for the act, when performed by an immortal, would surely kill the human, or not? And even if the person survived, could both natures combine? How would a woman carry something that was half her, but half something completely different and much stronger? If the father's strength didn't kill her, what about the child's? And wouldn't the child get thirsty? Wouldn't it drink her up at once? All these questions I asked at once, and Caius patiently gave me the details.

"Of course, of course, you're absolutely right. Imagine, Aro has been trying for a thousand years and still hasn't gotten what he wants. It is extremely difficult. More than half his experiments have ended before starting: either his strength or his thirst become too hard to control and he loses it. He has killed many girls and women only in the first stage. It is always an accident, of course, and he mourns them deeply. That is why you see him so depressed sometimes, he feels guilty. Some other times the woman survives, but she does not conceive. He tries a few more times, with no success at all, until he realizes it is pointless and then he is forced to eliminate them to protect the secret. Only a handful of times has his project continued: his girl became pregnant. But a couple of them had a spontaneous abortion, others had complications in the early stages and died and yet another one had an accident and perished as well. All those times were before you and your brother arrived. He has tried since then but with no results whatsoever."

"And how does he get the women? I'm sure they don't volunteer to be experimented on. Do they get to know what he really is?"

"No. You see, getting them is quite easy, the vampire charm is enough and just a little of it can get any feeble human. He seduces them, makes them fall in love with him, and of course they will agree to whatever he wants. He doesn't tell them anything about his nature and they don't ask, either. If any of them has suspicions or sees something, well, they are too besotted by his aura to do something that might mean losing him. He has everything on his side, yet after centuries his arms are still empty."

Caius' words rang in my ears for a long time. Quickly, all sorts of paths and options began to form in my mind. I didn't dare sharing them with Alec, for I knew he wouldn't approve of my still going over the subject of Aro. But I thought: if he ever gets this so precious child of his, then the mother would be his everything. I would be undoubtedly forgotten, this time for good. But then… if I managed to get him a woman who could conceive and carry the child until the end, then his gratitude towards me would be deep and eternal. I would then have to eliminate the mother, though, to clear my way. It surprised me how lightly I now considered murder. There had been a time when I'd really given it thought, done it only when it was necessary for my own survival; there had been a time, even before that, when the idea would have never, ever crossed my mind, when I cringed at the idea of hurting someone. I sighed. It was hard to believe that I'd once been a good girl. But I had, I really had. Anyway, that didn't matter anymore. That good girl had been burned and beaten and shattered and stepped on and was now lost, gone with the people that had paid for my fury before Alec found me. There was no point going back.

I moved forward, and during the next months only two things occupied my attention: to perfect my talent and to learn as much as possible about Aro's project. To achieve the first, I found support and advice in Caius, who became a sort of personal trainer. We worked together at night, back when we could still go out and hunt for ourselves, we would go someplace dark and hunt down the worst filth of the world. Murderers, rapists, kidnappers, they were our goal. They were so easy to find, proud as they were of themselves and sure about their own invincibility.

"There, Jane, knock him down," he'd say. Once the filth was writhing on the ground we would come closer.

"Harder, Jane, stronger," he commanded. "Come on, more."

"That's all I can," I said. "I can't push it further."

"Yes, you can," he always replied. He stood behind me, and held both my hands. "Do you feel that energy in your body, Jane?" he pressed my stomach, making me feel the flow, the rush. "You can do more, I know you can. You have it in you. Come on, breathe. Focus. There! Go!"

He would always be right –there was a little step to be taken, a little progress to do.

"Now, don't shake. No matter what you are feeling inside, you must always show power and control of yourself. I know you are upset. This thing is a monster. Hear him scream. Hear him beg you for mercy the way his victims begged him. Take pleasure from the fact that you will deny him this mercy. Feel the power, Jane, feel it. It holds you steady. Your body must not tremble. Perfect consciousness of every muscle you have, control them. Here," he held my shoulders or my waist to calm the shaking of the fury those animals caused me, mixed with the exhilaration of my superiority. "Relaxed. You are better than them. You are beautiful, strong, immortal." His words were like a mantra.

Eventually, the criminal would die because of the pain. "There you go, Janette, very good," he congratulated me. "Time for a reward."

The reward always consisted on a small child, often a boy, which Caius would hunt for me. I always appreciated the fact that he kept my personal tastes in mind. Caius was very supportive, even inviting my brother to practice (the terror of senselessness was just as fun to watch as that of agony) and together we grew to enjoy and develop our power as far as it could go. Each day we felt more unstoppable and invincible and the best part was that we were right. We were bringing the world to its knees, and that feeling was enough for me to keep going.

For the second part, I had no one. Chelsea had deserted me and Demetri was on the line between not caring about me and actually despising me. There wasn't anyone else in the guard that I trusted enough to ask for help, and the only two men that I did trust happened to like me, and therefore wouldn't help me. Caius and Alec had from the very beginning drawn a line and said they wouldn't do anything that would hurt me, even if I craved and needed it. My protection was more important than myself to them. I worked alone, first to make up my mind, then to trace a path, and finally to follow it.

After months of debating with what was left of my conscience and my very prominent ambitions, I chose to help my Master to get whatever he wanted. If it was a kid he craved, then so be it. I'd get it for him and then he would forever be in my debt. I had seen the spark in his eyes when he had first told me about his feelings, it was a spark I had never seen before or after that conversation, which gave me a good idea of how much it meant to him. If I succeeded in my plans, he would always remember me, and remember it was me who granted his biggest wish. It would put me forever in his favor, forever. And, of course, once said child was safely in this world, the mother would have to go. That much I was sure of –I would kill the child's mother with my own bare hands if I needed to, but she had to disappear. Then, with a motherless baby, Aro would turn to the one who always had always stood by him, who had aided him and the only one who he could trust with such a treasure –me. And then, finally, we would all get what we wanted.

I didn't quite share this plan with Caius because, after all, his true loyalty lied with his brother, not with a guard girl like me, and so I feared that I would lose his support and even get in trouble if I was once hundred percent honest with him. I'd had enough with all my conversations with Alec on the subject.

"Janette, it's going to kill you," said Alec time after time. "It's already destroying you. This obsession is taking shape, and in the end it will swallow you."

"No, Alec. I know I can do it. Please, please, don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do, darling. It's _it_ that I don't trust."

" 'It' what?"

" 'It' the situation. The plan. This man that is slowly crushing you-"

"Alec, we owe him so much-"

"That's not a pretext to do this to yourself. To us. See how it's changing our relationship."

"That is because you don't want to help me, Alec, if only you-"

"No, no, no. Jane, listen," he shook me by the shoulders. "Wake up. In a year, two, ten, a hundred, you might still be consumed by this idea. What guarantees you that you will succeed? And even if you did, even if you did, I know you wouldn't be happy. It goes against your nature, you are a creature that cannot be tied to anything or anyone, because when you do things like these occur. You are made to be independent, to shine on your own, not to live glued to a man and be forever his shadow. Even if your relationship with Aro changed, it would only do so in your eyes. To him, you would be nothing but a nanny, a nanny with benefits, perhaps, but nothing more. He might pamper you a bit more, but in fact you would never be anything more than a pet."

"You know what, Alec? It wouldn't kill you to support and believe in me once in a while," I growled, finally upset with his attitude, and left, trying to put my best show of dignity.

Another month or so went by, and then Caius called me to his presence, in private.

"Yes, sir?" despite our closeness, I still owed him quite a lot of respect.

"Jane, I called you because your first chance has arrived." He sighed, as if unwilling to deliver the news.

"What do you mean?"

"My brother is besotted once again. He's taken with a young woman in the North, and this might be just the time when he sees his wishes fulfilled. Time to work, Jane."

"But how do you…?" I trailed off. I thought he didn't know. I certainly hadn't told him anything, and neither had Alec.

"Marshmallow, I know everything." He patted my cheek. "Off you go, then. Take your chance."

"Thank you. I thought you did not approve."

"Oh, of course I don't, not at all. But you are too blind, child, and the only way you will ever see sense is by going through the suffering this will cause you. Come on, go. maybe you will impress me and prove me wrong. Go. Go, go go. Good luck."

His words had stung me, but I tried to hide it as I walked out the room. After all, I would prove him wrong, I knew I would. I had to, for pride and survival. I was ready to lie, to cheat, to kill. There was no consideration or feeling or kindness left in me anymore to stop me. I was ready for it all.


	20. Marguerithe

**Marguerithe**

Marguerithe was a milkmaid, very pretty and very poor. Black hair but skin as white as the milk she sold, with freckles all over her nose, cheeks and shoulders. She was twenty years old, one of many children in that family. Aro had met her on her way to the market, so early that the light of the dawn wasn't there yet to betray him and the upcoming winter would keep him safe the next days. He offered to help her with the buckets of milk she was dragging heavily and she accepted. They'd met every morning after that day and soon he had won her heart.

Of course, it was not her fault. Aro had chosen her with great care, not only in the sense of someone who would be so abandoned and attention-starved that she would never stop if the slightest suspicion arose, but also in the way that despite her poverty she appeared to be quite healthy, and, as I've said before, she was pretty. One look at her and you knew she was the strange kind to survive childbirth –an extraordinary feature back in those times- , and someone whose children would make it through their early years. Not to mention that, once he had won her trust, he began pampering her and brought her some type of cake or sweet when they met; he also had us go to the market –he sent his loyal elements, who he thought did not know and would not ask- and buy all the milk her family sold, so that they could have enough money for food. Soon, her health and prettiness were improved by the good nutrition. Marguerithe was very promising indeed.

But the fact that she was completely innocent in Aro's game of ambitions and whims did not stop me from feeling a burning wave of blatant hatred the second I set eyes on her. I hated her beauty, I detested her innocence, I loathed her humanity. I despised everything that was her. How many times did I fantasize with killing her, painlessly but irreversibly? Too many, perhaps. She was my rival, and even though she had no idea I felt as if she had declared open war against me. The only thing that stopped me from giving in to my instincts was the fact that I had promised to myself to respect my original plan, and, more important, I had promised Alec and Caius I would stay safe. I could break a promise made to myself, but to betray them was unthinkable. I therefore swallowed my hatred and carried on.

There was quite a strong possibility that Marguerithe would be The One, and the reality of it made Aro overexcited and completely easy to see through. Such was his hope and confidence that he once summoned me and told me about her, naively thinking I had no idea she existed. He didn't quite tell me what he wanted from her, only that he was feeling rather fond of her and that he would like to win her affections, no mention of the baby he hoped to get by her. He asked me to help him to win her favour, because, enchanted as she was by him, young Marguerithe still had not surrendered her purity to him, and he was getting impatient after four months of trying.

"Countryside girls should be so much easier to deal with," he said to me. "I cannot press the matter further, or she will mistrust me. But you're a girl, my dear Jane, and I hope you can approach her and, well, you know…"

"Of course, Master, I understand. Count on me."

So now I was officially informed of the subject and had the assignment of getting Marguerithe into my Master's bed. Poor, poor Marguerithe, she was viewed as nothing more than an object. She was simply the vehicle for Aro's true wish, I could tell by his voice when he spoke of her and by brief flashes of true body language when he visited her that his feelings were, if anything, a tender liking. He did not desire her, let alone love her, but he would be really grateful if she gave him what he craved. The fact that she was little more that a pet to him provided me with some sort of comfort and pity for someone absolutely innocent, a white victim that nonetheless I was decided to kill if necessary.

It was easy for me to approach her since I was already her customer in the market. I pretended I didn't know Aro, and with her weak human eyes she didn't see the resemblance between us, so she didn't suspect we were a team. Her sisters were much younger than her, and her brothers wouldn't pay attention to her, so soon she came to rely fully on me. Though I too was younger, at least in appearance, I knew how to add a few years to my image and, since though my body was frozen at sixteen I had the knowledge and experience of forty years, I could bring up that look of wisdom that made her surrender completely. I became her friend, and it didn't take too much effort to make her tell me about Aro. In a confidence, she said that she liked him too much, much more that she should, but that she was unsure of how to proceed because of her inexperience, her education and moral, and the fact that he was so clearly superior to her. Needles to say, every conversation went word by word to Aro, and together we spent hours scheming and planning how to get her.

I didn't know how I'd come to that, to being an assistant to such a plan, and I wondered why Aro had chosen precisely me, of all people, when he knew perfectly well what I felt. Through Caius I found my answer.

"He knows your affection for him is sincere, my love, and so he is sure that everything you do will be genuine and helpful. You would never betray him, sweetheart, and he knows and appreciates that. He needs as much help as he can get, and he trusts you and likes you enough to share his project with you."

Well, good. At least he valued me. That gave me a little more strength to carry on.

Little by little, I began slipping ideas into Marguerithe's head: he was a good man, and oh so good looking. Yes, I would say he liked her, otherwise he wouldn't still be there, would he? And just think of everything it would represent to have such a rich man in love with her –her family wouldn't be in danger of starvation anymore. Surely he would help her, wouldn't he, and then she would be quite pampered and the envy of her brothers and sister, and if she liked him, well, what was she doing there, oh you silly, if you like each other then it's meant to be. In the end, I convinced her that Aro was the best thing that had ever happened to her (which was probably true) and that if she were intimate with him, well, wasn't that good, a man who loved her, handsome and kind, instead of some ugly, old fat farmer that could even force her (Aro laughed when I told him about that last argument I said). And then finally, finally, she gave in.

Aro came home one morning smiling to himself. He met me on a corridor and kissed my forehead and my cheeks. I went to the market immediately, and surely enough found a very dazzled Marguerithe, whose eyes sparkled and the blush of the morning love had not left her face yet. Once she had sold all the milk she'd brought, a quick process due to Felix's intervention, we went back to her house and in that time she told me in detail what had happened. Yes, they had been together, and oh, it had been so perfect. No, her family didn't know about it at all, she even doubted they had ever seen Aro meet her every morning. If they had, they didn't mention it, perhaps in fear of getting in the way of a possible good match for her. It was easy to know that Marguerithe was now completely in love, and though she was one of the smartest humans I had ever met her feelings had handed her over to our side.

Once Aro had seduced Marguerithe their relationship went steadier, at least for her. They met every morning and now also at night, and I watched as the naïve milkmaid grew more and more in love while Aro's calculations and my own sought the way to set that love to suit our purposes. We kept her like that, in love and obliging, for another three or four months. I began to get worried this wouldn't work, but Caius assured me that it was still normal and that there were still hopes; sometimes, Aro had kept it going for over a year before something happened. Luckily, it was not necessary to wait so long. Around the beginning of the fourth month Marguerithe confided that there was a slight delay in her monthly pains, she didn't count the days but she noticed it. Along with that, she was always terribly hungry, but when she saw food she couldn't stand it, such was the nausea it provoked her.

I barely controlled the urgency to run home and tell my Master, but I managed, and when I returned to the castle I knew it was better to tell Caius, because if Aro knew this and then it turned out to be a scare the trouble would fall on me. Caius sent me to Marcus, he was the one who always dealt with these situations and with his help I got someone discreet to examine Marguerithe. Only when we were absolutely certain of what to say Caius and Marcus talked to Aro.

"Brother," they told him. "Congratulations. She's expecting."

With that I became again the favourite pet. Aro adored me, saw me as the assistant to his new miracle. Of course, he knew there were as many chances of failure as of success, it had happened so many times before, but he still was hopeful things could work out this time. I don't know what he told her parents, which of his many charms he used on them and how much money was used in the process, or what other magic he came up with, but not a week after Marguerithe's happy condition was announced she was brought to live with him.

She was sweet, enchanted by her new home and so afraid to lose the man she loved that she made no comments when she saw Felix, Alec, and myself there, living with Aro when we had sworn just days ago that we were surprised and knew nothing of that mysterious man. She saw us all, and treated us just like she had before.

"Either she's too scared or too in love," said Felix. "Or both. That is very good for us and terrible for her. Anyway, now she has something very important with her, and the Master has give orders to treat her as a queen. Nothing is too much when it's about Aro's heir."

I laughed. Felix loved so much this kind of circumstances, where everybody had a role to play and we all felt very special and necessary. But he was right, and now Marguerithe was our one and only priority. How Aro had kept his girls in secret before was a mystery to me, because now no one could escape her presence everywhere, the knowledge that she was with us and that she carried Aro's child.

She was very pleasant, though. She did everything she could not to disturb us, never had any whims or special requests, on the contrary, used as she was to working hard she tried to help us in everything, and it took a lot of effort to convince her that she was here to be pampered and granted her every wish. For her child she did it. She loved it, loved it with a passion I had never known, a kind of love I didn't imagine possible. The baby grew inside her, shaping her body nicely and filling Aro with joy.

"No one had ever made it this far," commented Marcus. "This can be the time. It has to. My poor brother has suffered quite a lot –this is the one thing he has ever truly wanted and loved."

It did look like all odds were in our favour. Marguerithe reached her fifth month without trouble, and she looked prettier and healthier by the second. It was then when it happened, oh, when that happened. I was with her, of course, I was spending more and more time with her under Aro's orders. She showed me the clothes she had been sewing and embroidering for her baby, who she hoped would be a girl. She had little dresses and little shoes and little hats, all made by her since she wouldn't allow Aro to buy anything; she wanted to dress her child herself. We were in the middle of that when Aro arrived, the smile that had become usual clear on his face and another gift that he tried to make her accept. He asked about the baby, he felt Marguerithe's stomach, and smiled at her. I could see it then, I saw the change in his eyes; there was no longer a paternal gleam in his eyes. He caressed Marguerithe's baby curve and then her cheek, only now there was tenderness in his touch, not just the need to feel the growth of the child or her health. I never imagined this would happen. In my happy world, he saw her as a vehicle only, the baby was born and I could easily pass her death as birth complications. In the real world… not.

He kissed her forehead and left the room, without a single spare glance at me. Then Marguerithe turned around with a sweet, bright smile and hugged me. She was so happy, now, she said, she had everything she had ever wanted: a family, a man who loved her, a baby, the certainty that that baby would not have to go through all the suffering she lived, she had a friend, yes, she had everything. I hugged her, too, surprised by her gesture. She took my hand, saying she wanted to go to the garden to sit next to my orchids, the prettiest flowers she had ever seen of course had to be produced by her best friend. We went out of the room and walked towards the big stone stairs that would take us to the garden. The steady steps of the stairs had never failed to make me feel safe, protected; they were as powerful and firm as I ambitioned to be.

We were about to descend said stairs. For some reason, Aro was still in the hall and when he saw us he smiled. Again that gleam, eyes focused on her. Then I couldn't. It happened. He didn't see my hands, he was so distracted by her that he didn't see my hands touching her for the briefest of seconds, just enough to make her lose her balance a little. But he didn't see my hands. All he saw were Marguerithe's feet as they struggled and tripped over themselves. All he saw was her body as it rolled, as it rolled all the way down the stone steps. All he heard was my own cry of horror. All he felt was the same icy grip that invaded us both, that stopped us from rushing to catch her. All he had in the end was Marguerithe's limp body in his hands, not a drop of blood, not a word, only her still warm body and the odd angle where her neck had broken.


	21. Fear and the unnatural

**Fear and the unnatural**

As was to be expected, Aro was devastated by Marguerithe's death. It had been a tragedy, just when everything seemed to be perfect for the first time. I spent a couple of months in terror, thinking he might go over what had happened that day and find some detail that could make him realize what had truly occurred. I went over and over every single second, trying to see how it could have ended differently, how it could have been so that I hadn't been forced to do what I did. Nothing I thought of suggested a different path. Aro had ruined everything with that look, that spark in his eyes. After that, nothing could have changed my mind, even if I hadn't seen his eyes then, I would have seen them in any other moment, and there would have still been no way back; sooner or later it would have happened, sooner or later I would have killed her.

I thought and thought about it, feeling horribly guilty while at the same time I couldn't find anything wrong with my deed, it just was something that had to be. At least, that's what I told myself. The words felt comforting, and I lived on them for centuries. To this day, I still believe the whole thing was written and there was absolutely nothing that could have been done to prevent it.

Needless to say, neither Caius nor Alec knew the truth. As far as they had heard, Marguerithe had tripped on her way downstairs, had tripped over her own feet and hadn't been able to grab me for support because in her eagerness to see Aro she had run and left me behind. She had fallen all the way down and since the stairs were made of hard stone her neck had broken in the process. All this was true, as was the fact that even as he realized that Marguerithe was dead he tried to save the child. There and then he tore her open to take the baby out, but the poor thing was so small, only five months, that it couldn't make it and actually died in its father's hands. It was also true that both were buried in the garden, that Aro wouldn't speak to anyone for weeks, and that finally he spent six months mourning them. There wasn't a single lie in this story; the only fact missing was that I was the cause of it all.

According to Marcus, it would take a few years for Aro to be ready to try again, so meanwhile we carried on with routine. Around a year later, when Aro was finally looking like he had come to terms with his loss, I was introduced to someone, one of the most peculiar being I have ever come across.

"Janette, Janette, come on, we are being summoned in the Hall," said my brother one evening.

"What is it? A trial?"

"No. I believe Aro has just met someone he finds very interesting. They have all been chatting for hours and now he has sent for us, I suppose he wants us to meet his new friend. Let's go, there's no time to waste."

He seemed excited and with reason: this was the first happy event after Marguerithe. Her whole intervention in our lives had been deeply stressful, and by the sound of it this new friend of Aro's could be the perfect chance to let go.

As soon as we arrived to the Hall we were greeted by an unusual smile from Aro.

"There you are," he said softly as he beamed. "Come, meet our new friend. He has just arrived from England. Jane, Alec, this is Carlisle. Carlisle, these are Jane and Alec, twins and the most valuable jewels of our home."

The newcomer smiled at us, a gesture we couldn't help but correspond. He was good-looking, blond hair, manly features, impeccable clothing, and an air of distinction and class that showed he had already been someone before immortality. He shook hands with Alec and then, like a gentleman, he kissed mine. But as he looked up I noticed something quite curious and, at the time, scary: his eyes were not the velvety shade of roses that we had always seen. Instead, they were golden, liquid gold that was like honey poured into his irises, as if there was topaz instead of rubies in his look.

"Ah, you have noticed," said Aro, pleased. "You can see that dear Carlisle does not look like us and at first glance, he might even be mistaken for some other kind of creature. But rest assured, my darling Jane, that Carlisle is one of us. The peculiar shade you see in his eyes is due to his diet."

"How so?" Alec and I asked at the same time, intrigued. No matter what Aro had said, Carlisle looked like anything but a vampire.

"Well, the point is, Carlisle does not feed on humans. He has never tasted their blood."

Aro might as well have said Carlisle came from outer space. Though we knew it was rather impolite, Alec and I couldn't help but stare at this strangest of man, who looked a bit uncomfortable but not in the slightest ashamed.

"How… how can that be possible?" my brother managed to say. "How can you survive, then?"

"I only drink the blood of animals," said the man. He had a pleasant voice, calm and quiet, but I already knew I would never fully trust him anymore. "It's like when I was human, only that now instead of the meat I take the blood."

"But why do you do that? Why can't you drink human blood?"

"It's not that he cannot, Jane dearest, but rather that he chose not to. You see, our friend Carlisle here is what you could call a good person. His heart won't allow him to kill a person, for he still regards them as his equals, his fellow race."

"I believe that since we were humans before, we owe them respect. It would be such a cruelty to hunt those that were once our brothers. But as humans we already animals, so there is no actual difference between eating the meat or drinking the blood." _Well, I couldn't tell you, _I thought to myself, _it's not as if we had a lot of meat on our table when we were humans. Or any food at all. Rich boy._ "Abstaining from murder is the one thing I can do to feel less monstrous."

The more I heard, the more I mistrusted Carlisle and the less I understood, and I could tell that Alec felt exactly the same. Aro continued, oblivious to our discomfort, and told us that Carlisle, who had made his mission in life to fight the 'monstrous nature' that had been forced upon him, had decided to study medicine in order to save lives instead of taking them. Carlisle's eyes, though still moderate and humble, glowed with pride at the mention of his projects.

"The vampires I found back in England were rather… primitive, so to say," he explained. "I am so glad I found you, and I should expect I can learn from you. Aro has offered to let me stay for some time, while I carry out my studies and learn from this lifestyle. I am still rather new to immortality, I'm afraid, but I'm also glad that I will now have all the time in the world to learn everything I have ever wanted."

"Carlisle is determined to be the vampire with the most culture in history. Already his knowledge is impressive, and with his passion for learning I have no doubt he will be quite successful. My only aim, on the other hand, is to make him see that immortality is the most precious of gifts, and not a curse, as he seems to regard it, and hopefully I will make him accept his natural diet."

Aro smiled at the brilliance of his plan, but our own reactions, including Carlisle's, were rather forced. You didn't need to be a genius to realize he would never change his mind about human blood, and that alienated him from us forever. And he didn't like immortality –a curse, in his opinion. After hearing that I was sure I really would never, ever trust him, and even liking him would take a while; to me the eternal life was the one true blessing on Earth, a treat so wonderful and indescribable as it was delicate, and in my eyes Carlisle had defiled it. That I would never forgive.

I have to admit, though, that during the time he stayed with us he proved quite useful. Never a nuisance, and one would barely notice him when he didn't want to be noticed. He finished his studies of Medicine without so much as the smallest incident, and if temptation ever became too strong or painful he never showed it. He was extremely polite, always respectful with the men and a total gentleman with us girls. If you walked by when he was with the Trio you could hear the most fascinating debates on arts, politics, science, literature. Since I was by far Aro's favourite he often invited me into the room, where I sat at his feet, was given a cup of fresh, warm blood –temptation in Carlisle's path, of course-, and Aro would stroke my head, which rested on his lap. I have to admit I learned quite a lot during those sessions, and the opportunity of the education I was denied as a human is something that I have always cherished.

I began to kind of like him, but our faintly good relationship died when he witnessed his first trial. Back then my powers were used as routine and not special questioning only; I loved practicing what Caius had told me, now with a subject that wouldn't die after only a few minutes, but with something more resistant. Vampires could go on and on, which allowed me to perfect my techniques and become absolutely lethal. There were stories about me, of course, I had become the greatest fear of the Volturi household, and in our society vampires told each other to be sure never to break the law in order to avoid coming here and face not the Volturi's laws, but my talents. I caused a mixture of terror and admiration that made Aro, Caius and Alec glow with pride when they looked at me. Not Carlisle, though. I will never forget the moment when I looked up during that first trial to rest a little bit before continuing, and met Carlisle's eyes, that had until then been fixed on me. The look of disgust in his eyes was mixed with something that resembled pity. When I started again, angrier, he discretely left the Hall without a word. After that day we never spoke to each other unless it was absolutely necessary, and we both made sure it never was.

Aro was sad about it, I knew he had really hoped Carlisle and I could get on because he sincerely liked Carlisle and wished that he could somehow convince him of staying with us and adopting our customs. But nobody ever felt comfortable in his presence, the weird gold in his eyes was disturbing, his calm manners and distant attitude were difficult and all in all he was impossible to understand. We could tell he didn't enjoy being with us, too: he avoided us as much as possible and it was obvious he was here only for the learning possibilities; he spent hours and hours locked in Marcus's study, surrounded by thousands of books, making notes and observations on everything there was to know. He learned to play many instruments, and finished his studies of medicine successfully, without any incident regarding human blood. Perhaps some of us were impressed with this last achievement, but nonetheless we were never able to make real contact with the mysterious Carlisle Cullen.

Meanwhile, we were preparing ourselves for Aro's next experiment. Caius and Marcus had told me that he always took at least three years to recover and they were right; Carlisle had arrived quite a few months after Marguerithe's death, and he had already been a year with us. Aro tried, he really did, but his taste was so demanding that he was always able to find flaws in every girl. It exasperated him terribly, for he really meant to fulfill his wish as soon as possible, but there was always a little something that didn't allow him to get any further. He never shared this with Carlisle, and no one else did; actually, it was a very small group of people that knew the truth, that Marguerithe had not been a separate incident but the umpteenth try of a delicate project that had lasted centuries. Aro was very private about that, and he never told his compassionate friend because his intuition seemed to tell him that not only would Carlisle disapprove if he found out, but he could actually stand on his way, his mercy and love for the human race wouldn't have let him witness the continual use and sacrifice of endless women and girls in the pursuit of a whim.

We kept Carlisle's attention diverted from Aro's scheming by presenting every form of art and science we had in those times. At night he visited galleries, libraries, and during the day he focused in the tools he had in the castle: more books, music, plants. Somehow, he convinced animals that he wasn't a predator, and instead of running from him as they did form us, birds and other small species approached him fearlessly. If he hadn't been so strange and if I hadn't known that he hated me, I would have actually admired him, admired his efforts, talent, self-discipline and control. It was impressive. Such a pity we never got along.

We all lived separate lives. Everyone carried on killing humans for survival and fun, new people arrived and some left, I continued with my training with Caius, Aro kept looking for the new right woman, and Carlisle stayed obsessed with finding that stupid humanity he missed so much.

Then came 1666, and September. The Great Fire of London. Oh, don't we all remember that day.


	22. Hell

**Hell**

You would have thought that something like the Fire of London would have little or no impact on us. We might have been happy, a massive elimination of detestable human beings. Well, we weren't. It was horrible. Awful.

You see, for many of us London or at least England was their homeland, and it hurt them terribly to see the place they loved reduced to ashes. Many actually asked for permission to go to the city to see if they could help rebuilding it. And if you ever read what they say about the Fire, that there are only six confirmed deceases, let me tell you that as our people gradually came home they had the most horrifying stories to tell about the heaps of charred bodies they had found, people of all social classes and ages had been reduced to cinders. Much as we hated humans nobody could have ever, ever wished such a tragedy on anyone.

The Fire was also the start of Carlisle's farewell. It was already obvious that he didn't enjoy being with us so much, but he was polite and tried to find a way to leave without being rude or risking an offense against the Trio. The Fire gave him the chance to practice his medical skills and he left for London the moment he found out, to tend to the wounded. News were arriving frequently, and given that that was a time with absolutely no communication or media it was easy to see how serious it was –bad news always traveled fast. Carlisle's stay in London drew longer and longer, just as Marcus had predicted and Aro refused to believe. He was determined to stay blind before the evident truth, which was that Carlisle would find a way never to come back.

France had become England's extension, for all the wounded were arriving there, and through French friends we stayed informed about everything. And it was precisely through France that Aro met his new project: Mariette. First he got word about her and then, intrigued, he took a quick trip to France to see her and came back besotted. Caius pointed out to Aro that she was exactly the kind of girl to die at birth if she even came to the end of the pregnancy; still, Aro remained set on his goal, arguing that it was something else that interested him. For there was also another tiny little detail about Mariette: she was a nun. Devote to the smallest corner of her heart, to the last drop of her blood. Marya, who was French and had asked for permission to go back to her hometown so that she could report to Aro, found Mariette in a convent that had been turned into hospital. She tended to the burned and the injured with all the devotion that a true soul of God could feel. Marcus told me that Aro said he wanted to try, even knowing how weak she was, he wanted to take his chances.

His brothers and mine seemed to believe him, but I didn't, I couldn't. It was too soon for him to try again, according to what I'd heard before, and it was just too strange that he had picked exactly her out of all the women in the world, knowing just how very breakable she was, and that her religious principles would make her particularly hard to get. There had to be something else, yet another hidden motivation that he wouldn't reveal to anyone, not even his brothers. Luckily, I got a chance to investigate without having to work for it. Aro trusted me enough to send me to France disguised as a nurse –"You must have heard Carlisle talk about medicine at least once, my love. I'm sure some of that stayed in your memory"- with orders to visit the convent Mariette lived in. Just as I had done with Marguerithe, my job here was to win her trust and once I'd achieved that I would introduce the idea of a benefactor to the convent, someone who wished to make a donation in favor of the good, kind-hearted nuns and their charities. She would have to come with me and close the deal in person, though. Aro would make sure that the donation was so ridiculously huge that she wouldn't have any choice but agree to his terms. After that, I didn't know what he had in store for her, but I knew it couldn't possibly be good.

I went to France anyway, of course, and let me tell you, hardly ever has mankind seen such pain as it saw during the months after the Fire. Quite a sad Christmas. Well, the point is, I arrived to the convent in late October, as disguised as possible under the appearance of a novice. The Mother Superior regarded me with a little contempt, but they were so desperate for any kind of help they could get that she accepted me without further inquiries. It was just my luck that I was sent to the wing of the convent where Mariette worked. Though I had never seen her in my life, or heard much about her, she was quite easy to identify: she was very much like Marguerithe, all humble, pure, kind. She was pretty, quite so, with auburn hair and dark blue eyes, but Caius had been absolutely right, that girl would probably be carried by a strong wind and a pregnancy would no doubt kill her. There was no other way.

I never got tired. I needed very little sleep and almost no food to resist. I could lift bags, carry bodies, go from one place to the other in no time. I could be in the worst places without being nauseated or falling ill. Obviously these are no remarkable features for those who know us but to the good nuns it was a blessing. Though some of them were pretty I was evidently the fairest by quite a margin, and that proved useful with the potential benefactors. Rich men often pictured nuns as being old, quiet women, wrinkled and lacking any grace, so you can imagine what they thought when they heard a knock on their door and saw me. They were enchanted to meet the little novice, so beautiful and charming yet so devote and humble, and their pockets opened at the same time that their hearts did. They looked into my eyes, which I tried to keep as black as thirst could allow (not that anyone would notice the changes with so much to do elsewhere) and claimed to see God's true goodness in them. Usually the money arrived to the convent with a note addressed to the Mother Superior, congratulating her on having such a kind soul as young Jane.

All these little features easily gave me access to little Mariette. She even seemed to look up to me, though she was physically older, because she thought that she had never met anyone whose path to Heaven was so clearly drawn. We worked together quite often, and I used the time to dig further into the girl's heart. As she shared it with me I began to own it, and with that to seep ideas into her mind. Her faith was so powerful that I knew I could never actually corrupt her, but since that seemed to be what Aro wanted I didn't complain. As time went by and the crisis began to fade we had more time to ourselves and I often took her for walks around a park or a garden, where I made her believe I was her friend. Unlike Marguerithe, who had actually awaken some kind of sympathy inside me, hers being the first murder I ever regretted, I couldn't bring myself to feel any affection for Mariette. Her love of God was exasperating, and her belief that I would undoubtedly be placed among the highest angels when I finally went to His side always made me want to kill myself, or her, or both.

It goes without saying that every single thing we discussed went into long letters to my brother and Aro, so that we could plan the next step. It was Aro himself who determined when it was time for him to be introduced. We agreed that I would pretend to receive a letter from some mysterious benefactor, the name would ring a bell, maybe it was _that_ Aro I had once heard of, one of the richest men in Italy. He would be interested in helping our convent, but first he needed to meet at least one of the nuns and his businesses didn't leave him much time to travel, so he wanted to invite the youngest of the nuns to spend a few days in his property with the objective of interviewing her in the representation of her sisters. He was doing the same with other nuns from other places so he could give the money to the ones that needed deserved it the most. It casually turned out that I was the youngest one in the convent, so if we were interested in his offer it was me who had to go. But of course, I couldn't go alone, and not even the fact that I would be escorted by my brother (the resemblance between us was too pronounced to hide; he would pick us up and take us to Volterra) could reassure the Mother Superior, who insisted that I should take another nun with me. And here came the best part: Mariette volunteered herself to go with me. This was exactly what we were trying to achieve, that she signed her own sentence and offered herself to us. Still doubtful but heavily tempted by the idea of the desperately needed money, the Mother Superior let us go.

It felt wonderful to have Alec's arms around me again. While Mariette slept we talked, and he said that he still couldn't figure out what Aro wanted from her. Over and over they had tried to convince him that she wasn't suitable for his purposes, but he remained stubborn. When we arrived to the castle, she reassured me that she would protect me and be there for whenever I needed her, and that we would prevent each other from following any path of temptation that might cross our way. I sighed and smiled, wondering how it was possible that someone could be so foolish and not realize how strange it all was. When ee went into the Hall, she held my hand comfortingly without knowing this had been my home for decades, and didn't realize how the guards and I exchanged looks of pride and admiration. I had brought the prey home.

Aro was there, and I could tell it cost him quite an effort not to acknowledge and welcome me back as he, and I, would have liked. He introduced himself as a count, and greeted us in a very formal fashion. When I met his eyes, I panicked. They were bright red, of course! Everyone's eyes were crimson! Mariette would know! But when I looked at her I saw that in her humbleness and desire not to be tempted or corrupted her eyes had not left the ground, and that the possibilities of looking up into the riches and wonders of our world were minimal if not inexistent. As long as her faith lasted we would be safe. We were taken to our rooms by Felix, who seemed to fight the terrible urge to laugh every time he looked at me. His mood was infectious, so I had a hard time controlling myself, too. Mariette remained oblivious.

After we had made ourselves comfortable Demetri arrived with Aro's request to meet him in his study. Mariette did everything in her power to come with me, but Demetri said Aro had asked only for me and something in his voice stopped Mariette from arguing any further. I went downstairs and when I knocked on the door I heard his real voice when he addressed me, the kind, warm tone.

"Come in, my dearest."

I opened the door and he greeted me with kisses in both cheeks. He held my hand and Saw for a while, reliving my experience through my skin. When he opened his eyes again, there was only the purest joy in them.

"Jane, I'm so proud of you. So proud. No one could have done that better. Now the girl is here and we must prepare the next stage of our little plan."

Of course, his aim was to seduce her. But as he spoke of what he wanted and planned I sensed a different atmosphere than when it was about Marguerithe; this was a darker tone, more passionate, and I could tell there was more desire for the girl herself than for other advantages.

"Master," I began cautiously. "I am sure your brothers have already noted this but, isn't this child rather frail? She does not look the type to survive or even carry out-"

"Oh yes, yes, yes, Jane, I know what you are about to say and yes, everyone has informed me of that in various occasions. But it is not her fertility that I'm after, of course I know she would fail. This is something different altogether."

So my suspicions were right. But if he wasn't interested in that child of his, then what could drive him to put together such an operation around a girl that was little more than worthless? He seemed to read the doubt in my face, because he continued.

"Darling Jane, don't you see? How would you define little Mariette?"

I thought for a few seconds. "A creature of God. She's fervent, dedicated, humble."

"What else?"

"She's… clean. Pure. She has never had any other than merciful thoughts. You can tell that she is an unpolluted soul and that she will remain so forever."

"She _would_ remain so," he corrected me. "She definitely would, except that now she is here. She is with us."

"Oh," I whispered as I slowly began to understand. "You mean that we will intercept her path to holiness."

"Of course we will, my love. I am sure that you of all people will understand best what I mean. You have had problems with these people of faith, believers of God that think people like you and me are dirty, dark, evil. Let us say they are right, and then we will have fun. Imagine taking such a white spirit inside our wings and make it change. Make it become ardent, tempted, carnal. Tear it away from God's merciful embrace and pull it into ours. Would we not love that, Jane?"

I breathed deeply as I processed Aro's words. Mariette was here for the only purpose of fun. Aro wanted to corrupt her, to make her turn her back on her faith, to destroy her purity, to shatter her beyond the point of redemption. That was his only purpose, nothing more. He would shatter her with the sole objective of amusement. Though I could perfectly see how horrible and cruel his game was, I couldn't help but getting wrapped in a burning curiosity to see what would happen and to be an active part of that.

"You want to corrode her faith. To invade her soul and body and make her turn her back on God."

"Not turn her back, no. I want her to willingly give herself up to me, and then suffer for it. I want to have her conscience torment her forever. That will be more fun: seducing her, making her fall, and let her feel the remorse for it, instead of just perverting her and shatter everything she is, not to mention that to do that entirely would be impossible. It is only fun. I want to mess with her, see what her limits are and push her to the very edge. So, what do you think?"

I found it terribly cruel, but at the same time I couldn't bring myself to object. I insist, there was a part of me that was too curious about the outcome to resist the game, and after all the things I'd been through I found it rather difficult to care about other people's feelings. I just found the experiment interesting and wanted to see how it would turn out, and that's what I told Aro. Pleased, he let me go and once again said he was very happy to have me home. I left the study and met the poor creature to whom we planned to do the most horrible things ever and invited her to pray.


	23. Broken Flowers

**Broken Flowers**

During the following weeks I watched one of the most powerful battles ever. Both were equally strong, Mariette in her faith and love for God and Aro in his lust for selfishness and self-confidence. The dedication that Aro put in using her thoughts to put everything she liked in her way -from flowers to food to the birds that sang by her window every morning-, was matched by the fervour of her prayers to her beloved Lord. Day after day went by and neither his nor her efforts seemed to waver.

Mariette's unexpected resistance called for stronger measures. Letters were exchanged and forged: some sent from our home to France, asking why the girl nuns had not arrived yet, and wondering whether they had met some ill luck on their way. With this the Volturi cleared themselves of all responsibility over us since according to them we had never even arrived. A fabricated accident in which a carriage heading from France to Italy happened to fall over a cliff during a rainstorm finally convinced the nuns back in the convent that their girls had perished before reaching their destiny. Who could have blamed them for believing that even after they'd seen the bodies; it wasn't for anything that Demetri spent days looking for girls around our shape and size, one brunette and one blonde, and the time used to deform their faces enough so that it could not be seen that it wasn't us had to count. The good nuns couldn't have guessed that both girls had already been dead before they were put inside the carriage and thrown.

The forged letters pretended to have come from the small French village to our home, announcing that the recent wave of the plague had swept away at least three-quarters of the convent including the Mother Superior, and that the rest of the nuns would have probably vanished by the time the letter was read. With that both sides believed the other to be dead, and therefore wouldn't try to meet again or wonder about anything. They mourned each other and that was the end. Yet it was also only the beginning, for now that she had no one looking for her and she didn't have any home to go back to, Mariette began to weaken.

It was imperceptible at first, and only the pieces of whole weeks made me see it. Certain dishes that she had denied herself before were now on her plate, and watching Aro's overjoyed smile when he presented her with some dessert or fruit made it hard for her to decline. And just as it began with the food, it continued, for now that the door was open there was no going back. One day I saw her wearing a new dress, exact replica of the one she had before but with an obvious improvement on the quality of the fabric. I was astounded by the fact that she'd been convinced to get rid of that old dress she'd arrived to the nunnery in and couldn't take my eyes of her. When she noticed she looked scared, probably thinking that there was reproach in my expression. That night, when I went to her rooms to say goodnight, I found the dress on her floor, torn to pieces, and her fragile figure knelt by the floor, so immersed in her prayers for forgiveness that she didn't notice me at all. She was beginning to feel the conflict inside herself, she was beginning to feel exactly the way that Aro wanted her to, torn, confused, mixed up. I left her alone and reported the event to my Master, who as expected seemed very pleased with the development of his little plan.

Like I had once done with Marguerithe, I was now assigned to seep some ideas into Mariette's mind, to plant the seed of doubt within her faithful, innocent little soul. Both Aro and I knew that her devotion was unbreakable, but he wanted me to weaken her just enough so that he could harm her the way he planned. That's how I took advantage of how blindly she trusted me to slowly, carefully mention how free I felt here in the castle, how happy I was, and, most important, what a kind and sweet man Aro was. I was sure of his generosity and was starting to like him, after all he had done only good things for us and even now that the convent was practically lost he kept us in his home, feeding us and letting us feel as if it was our home as well. Somehow I managed to do this and still make Aro look powerful, strong, and even scary, someone that even in his generosity was forbidden. Every day he tempted her more and more, so swiftly that she only realized when she was one step closer to him and one further from her God.

It was as cruel as it was exciting. The more I thought of what we were doing to her the more repelled I felt by it, but it also got more and more interesting to watch. Ever so imperceptibly she was being corrupted, dragged, and to see how every measure she took to protect herself brought her closer to danger was mesmerizing. But of course, from the second she had trusted me and opened her heart to me she was doomed.

To lead her on and make her believe she was safe I told her about a hospital that had settled in the city, where she would surely be welcome to help. I assured her that I would do something similar and maybe join her as soon as I had found people whose donations could support the cause. The hospital kept her entertained and fooled while Aro worked and everyone else ran the castle and the government affairs. The fact that Carlisle had left for good couldn't be ignored, especially because Aro hadn't been able to convince him to switch to our diet and he now feared that Carlisle would persuade others to follow his lifestyle, which wouldn't be so bad in itself, except for the fact that one simple idea against the system could lead to another simple idea, and then another, and a combination of many simple ideas could always become one difficult situation.

The Volturi kept a permanent watch over the territories that had once belonged to the Romanians in case one of the few survivors wanted to come back. The chances were slim, but they preferred to take no risks. After what had happened with the witches, Selene and her girls, other clans had nursed a grudge against us, so Alec suggested we changed our politics to find reconciliation with the witches; if we could make them regard that incident as an isolate one then we would have a good relationship again and mutual support should either side ever need an alliance. My brother and I had recently been promoted to the private council, that inner circle conformed only by the Trio and perhaps two or three others of their absolute trust; being considered as such meant a big, big honour to us. Marcus said that we had earned it after so many decades of loyalty and of showing results, of proving we were reliable and effective, and therefore we tried our hardest to live up to the high expectations that we knew hung upon us. Apparently our performance in these council meetings seemed to make a good impression on the Trio, for we were always called and asked our opinion before any decision was made.

It felt wonderful to be back home after all those months surrounded by death and misery at the convent, but I still had to keep some appearances for Mariette's sake. For example, I couldn't wear my jewels or my cloaks because they didn't belong to the sweet, humble nurse she thought me to be. And there was also the matter of the eyes: I couldn't feed properly because my eyes would turn bright red and that obviously wouldn't help at all in Aro's plan. I was thirsty and upset, I missed being completely me, but I lived for the nights, when Mariette slept and I could finally become the vampire I was, rich, powerful, and anything but concerned about humankind. It was at night when, after she had fallen asleep and I was able to leave the room we shared, we held the meetings, at night when I hunted, and at night when I could go out and find some drunken or criminal of my choice to practice my ever growing talent on. It was at night when I lived.

By the next time I truly paid attention to Mariette I was impressed by Aro's work. She looked nervous, anxious, and whenever I asked her what was troubling her she refused to answer and her heartbeat sped up. At night I heard her pray fervently, time and time again, and once, while checking her prayer book, I noticed that some paragraphs were underlined, some pages more read and touched than others, and all the words, all the prayers referred to temptation. They all begged for strength, for the ability to resist what appeared in the path of life. Yes, Mariette was finally beginning to suffer the way he wanted her to.

One morning, as we walked around the shadows of the garden (extremely sensitive skin being the one problem that Sister Jane suffered of) and she went on and on about how beautifully God had built the world, Aro approached us. In his hands was a bouquet of flowers I recognized immediately, and on his face a wide, warm smile. Once again, Mariette's heart accelerated.

"Hello, my dears. Enjoying yourselves in this beautiful autumn morning, I see."

"Yes, sir. I was just telling Sister Mariette how lovely the garden is. Such pretty flowers." Aro always found my pious girl performance hilarious, and to hear me compliment my own work with the garden would no doubt make him smile at me later during the night.

"That is wonderful. I am glad you like the flowers. Actually, Mariette, since I know you have a particular liking for them I took the liberty of buying these for you."

He handed her the bouquet and I mentally began to wish that she did not know about the meaning of flowers, because if she did the assortment Aro was offering her would immediately alert her to something. There were exquisite pink gladiolas, soft and tender, blossoming in their green stem like butterflies. Along with them were orchids, not like the ones I had in the gardens but wilder, like they had just come from the mountains, they were in the caressing shades of lilac and white that matched the pink of the gladiolas to perfection. I looked at Mariette, and behind the deep red that had painted her cheeks and neck I saw that she understood nothing about the flowers and relaxed. If she had known, she would have remembered that gladiolas were the symbol of provocation, and that orchids meant seduction, as well as sensuality. He was openly saying what he wanted from her, but in her purity she did not notice. Her reasons to refuse the flowers were out of humility, because the flowers were expensive and her faith did not allow her to accept presents from the rich, or from men, though of course she appreciated the thought.

Aro smiled, and the gesture was so kind and tender he convinced me for a whole second. "Oh, come on," he said in a sugary voice, "don't be shy, accept them. For your saints."

"You can place them in your altar, the one for the Virgin Mary," I offered. Aro looked at me with approval. "They will match her blue mantle beautifully."

If Sister Jane said it was right to accept the flowers, then it was. She took them gracefully, the blush never leaving her skin and her eyes never leaving the ground. She thanked him again, and so did I. Seeing that her grasp on the flowers was feeble, her fingers trembling, I suggested that we returned to the shadow and coolness of the castle. I looked back for a fraction of second, and Aro winked at me.

Back in our rooms she placed the flowers before the altar, just as I'd suggested. The ultimate gesture, showing her Mary the signs of the temptation she was being led into. I left her alone, because every time she brought something to her saints she liked to say a few words, not quite a prayer, but something to demonstrate her faith. I closed the door behind me and met Caius, who looked as if he had been about to enter the room.

"Caius. How can I help you?" I usually adored seeing Caius; he was my best trainer and hated people just as much as I did; however, this time his presence made me rather uncomfortable.

"Lower your guard, Jane. It's not you I want. I only meant to check whether our little holy child had finally yielded."

"Caius, no disrespect, but about that project I inform only Aro."

"So she has not. Oh but it's nothing but a matter of time. After my brother's little trick with the flowers she won't last too long. Rest assured that you will once again succeed and continue being Aro's little golden demon."

"That I have never doubted."

"Never? Why, I thought you smarter. Don't ever think for one second that you have secured something. However safe you may feel, never take anything for granted. You can never know when it will all turn against you and take away everything you have worked for. The less you trust, the more you will stay safe."

The talk about loss made me uncomfortable, so I tried to go back to Mariette.

"I still think it is going to take a while before she gives in. She's strong, no matter how stupid she looks on the outside."

He laughed. "Strong? That one?"

"Well, it has taken Aro quite a time to seduce her."

"Of course it has; that only proves the extent of her stupidity. I've always told Aro that if he wants her that much, he can simply put in her drink some of the powder he keeps in one of his cupboards. Or he could simply go to her room and do as he pleased. Then we'd see if she was still so resistant."

"What you suggest is disgusting," I couldn't help saying. Despite the decades I still had the memory of my attempted attack quite fresh, and the suggestion that something similar could be done to someone else, even if it was someone I disliked so much, enraged me.

"Calm down, my love. It was only a suggestion nobody will ever hear, there's no need to be so sensitive. It would definitely help if he wants her as badly as he does, though."

"That's not-" I looked at the door, unsure of how easily she could hear us through it. I grabbed Caius' arm and led him to the nearest corridor. We were out of earshot but we still spoke in whispers. "That's not the reason he wants her and you know it. Unlike you, Aro seeks something more than bedding her." I knew Caius' weaknesses, I knew that though he hated humans he had quite a liking for the mortal girls.

"You bet he does. A rather cruel plan, don't you think? I never imagined he would want something like this; he never showed any resentment towards the church, they never did anything to him. This was something I would have expected from you, perhaps."

"What, to want to bed a girl?" I raised an eyebrow in sarcastic mockery.

"Maybe. That is up to you. But I meant the desire to corrupt someone faithful, to break a soul to the deepest point of shame."

"I lack the patience for such games. You have seen I play in a completely different way. But you… what is it that you seek? You know Aro would kill anyone who tried to touch his girls."

"That doesn't mean I'm not going to try. Who knows, maybe after he's done with her I will get to have a bite… literally."

"If I were you I would look for a tastier dish, not that bread-faced girl."

"A tastier dish?" he laughed. "What now, do you want me to bed _you_ instead?"

"You're a terrible person," I said, and smiled. Caius had a way to invariably draw one on my face whenever we spoke. He knew our relationship was anything but that, there was no sensuality or hidden innuendos. We trusted each other, I learned from him, and we shared many views about life, but we would never share anything under the sheets.

"There you go. Smiling and admitting you love me. Don't worry Jane, if you don't want me to touch that kid then I won't. At least not now. I'm sure my time will come eventually, and if it doesn't, well… I'll keep in mind your good disposition."

He leaned forward and kissed me on the lips. I smacked his arm and in return he mussed my hair. We both laughed and he disappeared, his cloak waving like huge black wings behind him.

I returned to the room and prayed with Mariette. She was strangely calm, and though she prayed with the same ardour as always there was a quietness in her that unsettled me; it was the mixture of terror and resistance and faith and despair. Over the next few days she prayed more often, and there was a new urgency in the whispers she thought I couldn't hear. I pitied her, so young and innocent, she had trusted absolutely the wrong person; in me she had found the hands not that would protect and help her, but that would unperceptively yet relentlessly push her towards her end.

One night, almost two weeks later, I went out to hunt and practice with Caius. I returned to the castle happier and more relaxed than I had felt in a long time; Aro spotted me and once again called me his little sunbeam as he patted my head. When I returned to the room I shared with Mariette I was shocked to find her crying. To her credit she cried softly, only quiet, discreet tears and the slightest of sobs. She was lying on her bed and all scattered on the floor around her were the flowers, torn, stepped on, twisted, bleeding. Their pouring scent mixed with that of her sorrow. I counted the broken flowers and realized one was missing. It didn't take me long to find it: it was trapped in Mariette's fingers, a hand that seemed to lie loosely but whose grip was the fiercest. I left again, feeling like an intruder in her pain, and went straight to report to my Master.

Mariette had fallen. 


	24. Down

**Down**

And fallen she had. Swiftly, quietly, and with all her soul, the way she always did everything. Of course, her downfall was my ladder to Aro's adoration. I was back in his highest favour because he considered it my triumph as well as his. I had found her, persuaded her, stained her and seduced her almost as much as he had done and now he allowed me to enjoy the conquest with him.

Winning like that sent wave after wave of pride all over me; after all that time I felt like myself again: a vampire, immortal, strong, powerful. I have never been ashamed of who I am, of this gift Aro gave me, and during those days I enjoyed it more than I ever imagined.

There was only one situation that made me uncomfortable, and that was that I missed being with my brother. The whole thing with the girl had put a lot of distance between Alec and me that I meant to delete. Therefore I asked him out in a kind of hunting date, just the two of us, where we would look for the little children whose blood delighted us so much and. We were hunting together, the way we hadn't for a long time, and it was wonderful: the adrenaline of the killing, the sweet blood down my throat, the opportunity of sharing it with the one person I knew I could always count on. Alec raced me down the streets and up the hills, made a crown of blue flowers to match my golden hair, and, since he had an easier way with the kids, he even caught a couple of children for me. It was a perfect evening. We took our time hunting and returning to the castle, enjoying the shadows and the evening sun that made the sky look on fire. No, maybe not on fire, more like a thousand orange tulips. Yes, more like that. I didn't like fire. Anyway, it was a beautiful twilight

As soon as I was back I went to the garden to pick up flowers for the hundred vases we had in hallways and rooms (Aro loved seeing flowers everywhere), and once I finished that task I headed upstairs to see how Mariette was doing. Night had already fallen in full bloom, so I supposed I would find her asleep or finishing her prayers. However, as I approached the room I heard voices coming out of the semi opened door, hers and someone else's. Listening closely, I realized it was Aro, and both of them spoke in hushed whispers, Mariette's tiniest of all.

"Don't… please… don't…"

"Shh, fear not, my darling. Everything will be fine."

"But I… I…"

"Do not worry. I will not hurt you, how could I? You know I love you, don't you, my sweet? If I hurt you, please do tell me and I will stop. I would hate nothing more than seeing you upset. This is supposed to make you happy. Just relax and enjoy it, my dearest love."

By then I had reached the door. He held her softly by the waist, and it was a good thing he did, for her entire body was trembling with terror and ignorance. I could swear she had no idea about what she was about to face, and the presence of the unexpected was more terrifying to her than anything else. She would have fainted if he had had less pressure on her body. When he finished his speech he bent forward and pressed his lips to hers, like he had done before. She didn't kiss him back but she didn't stop him either, so he went lower and kissed her jaw and then her neck. I could see that her body was impossibly tense, tight and unmoving yet surrendering. With fingers as slow as time, he began undressing her.

I knew it was very wrong of me to watch, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from them. It captivated me to see that there was anything but love in that bed: he was taking her out of cruelty, just to prove his own power and to shatter her; though he did not hurt her at all, physically speaking, it was evident that he had no other reason to have her but that one, causing her damage. She didn't fight, but that was because she was so stupid it probably didn't even occur to her. Knowing her, she must have believed she deserved it. Poor foolish girl. She would be repentant and self-torturing, but no prayer would ever be able to heal her and put her back together. I watched them, and though I'd die if Aro only saw me the way he saw Mariette, deep down I knew I envied her. She had gotten, in a matter of months and only because she existed, something I knew I could never have, no matter how many more decades I spent serving him.

Finally, I decided to leave. There would be more than enough time for me to see the effects of that moment. On my way downstairs I met Caius, and we exchanged a look that said it all. He nodded quickly, getting my message, and vanished. I went to one of the castle's libraries, where I knew I would find my brother. Just looking at him was enough to draw a smile on my face.

"They…" he began.

"Yes."

"Are you going to kill her?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. I actually think he will kill her himself once he gets tired."

"What if she conceives?"

"That one? I will be surprised if she is still alive in a couple of hours. You know how frail she is, mere intimacy with one of our kind would kill her, let alone childbearing."

"That is true. And it will be a while before he kills her and gets bored again and decides to give this child of his another try."

"Yes. I have more time."

"Time? Time for what?"

"I don't know. Time."

"There is nothing you can do, sister, and you know it, sooner or later it will happen. You cannot keep killing all of Aro's girls.

I sighed. "I know. But I can try."

He rose from his chair and walked towards me. He hugged me as only he could and as he patted my back he tried to make me see reason.

"If you keep killing or sabotaging them Aro will find out, and you know what the punishment for treason is. We have only experienced his kindness, but there is a dark side to him, a cruel side, that I do not wish us to see. That I do not wish _you_ to see. You have seen what has happened to other covens, what happened to the witches."

"Aro would never do something like that to us."

"I don't know, Janette, but I think that man is capable of doing anything to anyone, and I do not want us to be the ones who test it. Please, Jane, promise me you will stay safe. No more murdering girls."

"But-"

"For me? Please? Won't you stay safe for me?"

He knew I couldn't refuse him, not when it was him who could be hurt. I promised and swore everything he wanted without any further complaint.

"There's the Jane I know. My sister would never risk herself over some meaningless human."

Outside, in the Hall, we heard voices; one of them was Aro's, summoning us. We met him and his brothers in an official reunion that only held the five of us. As Aro sat in one of the velvet chairs I saw that his eyes shined with quite a curious gleam –satisfaction, pleasure, but very different to those I knew. It was then that I had the first look at the cruel being Alec had spoken of. Under the table, I held my brother's hand.

It was Marcus who began. "Now that our little dove has finally yielded I think it is time to tend to other pressing matters." By the tone of his voice I knew the whole business with Mariette had been awfully irritating to him; he needed to get to real work. "Every century or so we organize a feast to celebrate our ascent to power over the Romanian coven. We invite covens of certain level and influence from all over the world and it also serves as a reminder of our strength and power, if anyone doubts it. We usually organize this celebration on the exact or closest day, but this time, due to, ah, some distractions, we are a little over a month late."

Caius also looked displeased by the delay, while Aro kept a smooth face and a self-congratulatory smile.

"However, we shall not cancel the feast only because of that small inconvenience. We wish it to be as splendid as always, and that is where we need you. You are to organize everything, we will give you a guest list and some special requirements and you will make it happen. Special attention needs to be given to security and discretion, the feast will take place within these very walls and we cannot draw attention from the humans. We are asking you to take care of this because, no matter how superficial the event might look, it is extremely delicate. Matters such as feeding the guests, management of covens, organization of the celebration itself and all such logistics need to be seen to with total discretion. The feast must be absolutely splendid yet go unnoticed by mortals. For that we trust you, Alec, with that gift you have for concealment and privacy. Jane, you will see to the hunting and providing of enough blood for everybody, and, naturally, you will use the womanly eye for beauty to see to the feast itself."

Alec and I looked at each other, unsure of what to do next. We believed that party-planning was below our functions, but if they were asking us they surely had a reason, and it wasn't as if we could refuse.

"You will see to all this," said Aro, "and our world will once again see how invincible the Volturi are. Not that they need any reminder," he chuckled, "but they could do with one anyway. It will be your responsibility."

Alec and I held hands tighter and gave the only answer we could. "Yes, Master."

From then on there was too much to do, too much work, and I barely had time to look after Mariette. That she was shattered was obvious, but though I tried to approach her she seemed to be hiding from everyone. That was good, because she didn't interfere with the party arrangements, but it worried me. Shame? Fear? Shyness? I never knew, and for a couple of weeks she talked to no one, saw no one but Aro, and she always looked worse after one of his visits.

But there was too much to do and I couldn't pay proper attention to the evolution of Aro's sadistic project. When I finally did, it was too late. Everything had gone perfect.


	25. The Feast

**The Feast**

I never imagined that party-planning would be so consuming and tiring. In the end my brother dealt with most of it, given my utter incapacity. Alec knew about harmony, beauty, aesthetics, he knew what kind of music suited which moment, which flowers would last longer, which colors would bring out the beauty of our nature. My brother was much softer, much more delicate than me in many aspects of life, but by no means weaker: during the weeks before the celebration he directed everyone –staff, helpers, guard, and even me, with a strong hand and unbreakable will that nobody dared defy.

All in all, those were very stressful: the party, daily life, organization, meetings, duties, having to preserve our good position… it was endless. And of course, of course, there was Mariette. I had finally had the chance to talk to her after everything that had been done to her, and it didn't surprise me to find her completely shattered. What did surprise me was how touched I was by her pain. It was a quiet suffering, in which she blamed her disgrace on herself and herself alone. She was so ashamed of herself that she wouldn't even admit that she slept with Aro, at least not openly. The closest we ever got were some disguised mentions of "her disgrace". But she would never face directly what was happening to her, let alone defend herself, and what scared me the most was that she did not blame me for leaving her alone when she needed me the most, but was convinced that if she had stayed with me, listened to me, she would have been safe. But as illogical as it might sound, she still went meekly whenever Aro summoned her.

Day after day she looked more hurt. Sometimes Alec and I wondered if we should do something about it, choices going from killing her once and for all to talking to Aro. But then I remembered how much we had suffered, how hurt we had been in our time, and how nobody had helped us, nobody at us… nobody but Aro. We owed him, and our debt was so enormous that we had no choice but to go along with his plans. Little by little we grew insensitive to Mariette's pain.

Finally, the big day of the celebration arrived; the previous 48 were spent in absolute hysteria from us, running all over the castle and shouting to anyone and everyone we met on our way. But as the guests arrived and the atmosphere began to build we knew it was worth it. To our delight and relief, the party went wonderfully. We had made sure all of the Volturi's political acquaintances were present to witness once more the greatness of what we had built. Aro, Marcus, and Caius looked very proud and satisfied, and to know that they were pleased with us was all the reward I asked for.

As midnight closed on us came the most important part of the party: the banquet. In those times secrecy wasn't as vital as it is now, because the death rate was so high due to illnesses, war, and an already low life expectancy, that a few more deaths would go completely unnoticed. If the destruction of our village hadn't drawn any attention then this little feast of ours would stay in the dark forever. What we had in store for our guests would be remembered for quite a long, long time.

Finding the humans had been rather easy, as was catching them and bringing them to the castle. I didn't know that there were dungeons underground, but they proved very useful for storing our little guests until it was time. Oh, they gave some trouble, of course, but between Alec's talent and mine they soon learned to behave. Therefore, when we took the upstairs they knew better than to complain. At first when the guests saw us they didn't understand. Their eyes went from the trembling humans to us, back and forth, back and forth, without making the connection. It was until Caius, who was in on the plan (of course, we would have never done such a thing without official permission), took a shaking young girl by the hand, pulled her to him, and sank his teeth onto her soft neck, that everybody got the message. From then on, it was unstoppable glory. It was a good thing that I listened to Alec when he said we shouldn't bring them all up at once, because once the first frenzy was over there came a period of sanity, but after that one the thirst burned again and we had backup humans to offer.

There was dancing, there was politics, there was blood, and there was the chance to be seen and admired as a vampire. Everyone knew it was us behind the entire celebration, and congratulated Aro on having us. Not only that, since we had built a reputation over decades there were some people who expressly asked to meet us. It was an honor; we knew important deals and alliances would be made tonight, between covens from all over the world. We were watching power being born.

The Trio looked extremely pleased with this display of authority and admiration. When they caught our eye they smiled, and we knew we would be rewarded for showing the rest of the vampire world who ruled here.

"Oh, Jane, Alec, but you have not had anything yet!" said Aro, gesturing at the few humans that were still alive. "Do taste some of it, the selection is exquisite." When he said that he caressed my cheek. Alec and I looked at each other, and I saw my thirst reflected in his eyes. We approached the humans, who by then were crouching on the floor, just waiting for someone to kill them. In the eyes of some I knew that, were they released, they would surely kill themselves or die shortly anyway, such was the madness in their eyes. They simply wouldn't hold for much longer. Hidden by the group in their lasts spasms of sanity I found my favourite treat –a child. It was a little girl around three or four years old, her pretty face red and wet from recent crying. She wasn't clinging to anyone in particular, so I guessed her parents had already been taking. In a way I was glad, because I wasn't in the mood to fight with some weeping mother begging for her daughter's life; something quick and easy was more my style. I took her in my arms and examined her, for I didn't remember seeing her when I hunted the people.

"I got her especially for you," said Alec with a smile as big as the world. "I thought you would like her."

I smiled back at him, feeling immensely lucky to have him as my brother. He always knew what I wanted, what I needed, even when I didn't know it myself, and he was the one person in the entire planet that I was certain I could always trust no matter what. I adored him. I looked at the little girl again, and, to my surprise, she put her little arms around my neck in a hug. I supposed she felt finally safe there with me, my lifting her and smiling at her was probably the one nice detail he had received since she was caught; the poor thing had no idea that this was the most dangerous moment she would ever have in her short life. Nor would she ever know, for then I finally pulled her curls back to reveal the soft skin of her neck and bit in.

The rush of sweet, warm, sugary blood into my mouth made me almost delirious, but though I wanted nothing more than to have all of her blood in my veins at once I had to make the moment last, I had to take my time and enjoy this little, delicious surprise for as long as possible. I felt a little drop of blood run down my lips but I paid no attention –compared to the endless stream running down my throat a drop meant nothing.

I drank without pause, savouring the precious liquid until the girl's tiny body was dry. As I swallowed one last time I heard a quiet gasp behind me; Alec's unmistakable voice alerting me. I looked up, and my lips tried to form an explanation for the unjustifiable. My body went numb and the dead child fell limp to the floor. Some guests turned to look at us, though the majority was dancing and celebrating, oblivious to the catastrophe. Aro sighed. I looked down. Caius rolled his eyes. And Mariette, Mariette just looked at me, at the wound visible on the girl's neck, at my red lips and the tiny thread of blood that shone down my mouth.


	26. Truth and a jar of blood

**Truth and a jar of blood**

We looked at each other with unmoving eyes. I tried to take a step towards her but she quickly turned around and ran into the darkness, away from the secret she had just unveiled. I looked around: no one else except our own people realized what had happened. Aro sighed again, but he didn't actually look displeased, Alec, on the contrary, looked at me with eyes that said, _Go fix this now_. Next to him Caius nodded, also with a serious face. Without any other option, I went after her.

I quickly caught up with her, and called her name. She covered her ears and kept running, yelling at me, she wanted me to go away. I insisted and finally she stopped. She turned around, hands still on her ears, her whole body shaking and trembling under some sort of hysterical attack. I waited until she was calmer and began to explain the best I could the diabolical scheme she had been brought into.

She asked me for the truth. The truth. Something so simple, yet so complicated. How could I tell her? What should I tell her? She was fragile, very fragile, both of body and spirit, and I had no idea of how she would take the truth. I tried to make her find it out for herself, to think, what had she seen? She made no reference to my nature, what I am, since her worries were of a moral kind rather than biological. She seemed horrified by the fact that I had known everything about Aro's intentions than by my drinking human blood. She demanded if I knew him since before we came to the castle together. I had to admit to that. There was pain in her eyes when I said that, more when she asked if Aro and I had been talking behind her back, and absolute agony when once again I said yes.

There was no need for more; she'd had her truths. There was no need for me to tell her that I had been a part of her seduction and downfall: her eyes told me she had understood. She now knew that it had all been planned, from my arrival to the convent to every second Aro had spent in her bed, and she knew he had planned it all with me. I wasn't her friend, her partner, her support, but the one who had handed her in. She called me every name there was on Earth. I couldn't decide what surprised me more, if her fury or the simple fact that she knew so many words to describe me; wouldn't have expected it from her. She screamed and screamed, fierce, completely lost in her pain. She was just as broken and corrupted as Aro had always wanted her to be.

Still, there was one question that managed its way through her vocabulary, why. Why, why, oh in the name of God why. What had she ever done to me, that I chose to do such harm to her. I had no idea how much I could tell her; the rest of Aro's plan was unknown to me and I knew that talking too much was the surest way to upset him. He had wanted her lost, defeated, broken and faithless, but now that she was utterly shattered I didn't know what he would do to her next. _Oh, just tell her already_, I thought to myself, _she's already beyond repair._ I took a deep breath, as if it would help, and told her everything. I skip the details of our immortality, but I told her that I was sent to the convent by Aro specifically to get her, that he had been watching her for a long time. No, I wasn't his lover. No, not his daughter, either. I simply worked for him, and had been there for a long time. Yes, I knew what he wanted all along, and every little thing I did was meant to serve his purpose. She buried her head in her arms, panting, growling almost, and fell onto her knees. She looked like a child, completely defenseless, and when she began to cry very softly it almost made me feel bad.

I tried to approach her, but she sensed me and crawled away. When my fingertips brushed her shoulders she squealed and kicked, then got up and ran to the castle. I decided not to follow her, whatever I said or did would only make matters worse. I returned to the castle by another entrance and went directly for my brother. He advised me to let her rest and digest everything. Meanwhile, we went to hunt and I was able to release some of my anger and frustration at our prey. When I returned and asked around nobody had seen her.

"She can't have gone too far away," said Aro. "Find her and bring her to me."

If she was inside the castle there was only one place where she could be. The room we shared had always been her refuge, especially after Aro had seduced her, and I knew she wouldn't feel safe anywhere else. I went to the floor our room was in, and heard nothing. If she wasn't there, where else could she be? There was no sound coming from the room, no crying, no praying, no heartbeat, no nothing, only a faint, faint noise, like two things brushing against each other, the sound of air moving around them. Then I realized that Mariette's scent was there, strong as it only was when she was present. If she was inside the room, then why couldn't I hear her? I walked down the corridor until I reached the door, and opened it. She was definitely there, I could tell by the scent.

I softly pushed the door open. I could definitely see her shape now. Oh yes, she was there. She had changed to a pretty white dress and wore no ornaments except of the matching white rope made of bed sheets that was tied around her neck on one side and tied to the lamp in the ceiling on the other. I sighed and went downstairs, where the party had already faded, to deliver the news to Aro. He nodded slowly, then offered me a cup of blood while he commanded Felix to deal with the body. I sat, sharing the table and the liquid with Aro. I tried to guess his mood; his unmoving face and smooth voice gave me no clue at all. He looked at me, sipped, then sighed and looked around and sipped again. Finally he met my eyes and a small but happy smile appeared on his face.

"You know what, Jane? I think we did quite well this time."

I stared at him, unsure. "Do you really think so, Master?"

"But of course! Just look at what we have just done. I really see ourselves working as a team. We could get far, playing with humans."

Felix reappeared, carrying Mariette's body. Despite having hung herself her face was still pale and smooth, peaceful, even. There weren't traces of tears, though it was possible to tell that the calmness in her features had only come after death.

"She wasn't exactly pretty," said Aro, "it was only youth she had. We did her a favour by not letting her grow old enough to realize that. She was also a terrible lover, so inexpressive!"

Felix and I said nothing; we didn't know what could be appropriate. I saw that Marcus had arrived, and distaste was clear on his face. I had never been as close to him as I was to Caius, but I'd heard enough gossip around the castle to know that he absolutely disapproved of what Aro was doing. He pursed his lips as he saw the girl's dead body and looked at his brother meaningfully. Aro only chuckled.

"Burn it," he said, turning to Felix, who nodded and disappeared.

"Brother." It was Marcus. By the look of his face I could tell he was more upset that usual. Aro gestured at his study and they both went in. Knowing that it would be a long, long discussion I left the castle and went to the gardens, where Felix was burning the body. It surprised me how very little emotion I felt, how unmoved I was by the whole episode. Once Felix had set fire to the pyre we sat together and watched the flames do their work. His face was just as expressionless as mine, and just as insensitive. Neither of us spoke as she burned.

By the time the task was done the sun was well up in the sky. We scattered the ashes and erased all traces of her, keeping absolutely nothing that could bring us a memory of her. Inside the main hall of the castle we found Aro and Caius sharing laughter and the usual jar of blood. Caius was quite happy about the end of Aro's game, of course, and had surely wanted to celebrate his brother's victory. Marcus was nowhere to be seen; I guessed he had lost the argument. If anyone saw our routine and attitude that day, it would have been impossible to know that we had killed a girl the night before.

It would take a long time for Aro to pursue such entertainment again, but when he next tried, it all changed so much that who the victim of the game was would become very, very unclear.


	27. The New World

**The New World**

There were more women after Mariette, of course, but none as important as she was. He never took them because of the child he had once been desperate for, he seemed to have given up on that subject altogether. He took them for mere desire now, and with that idea in mind he was kinder to them; at least he never again felt the need to play with them as much. Most of the time it was I who ended up being the cruelest to them, because I hated them all, every single one of them. From Luciana with her long, shiny raven hair to Nana and her auburn locks, or even green-eyed Georgia, I hated them all. I constantly looked for ways to disappoint them, to make them suffer, to make them regret they had ever spoken to Aro. Some of them I even killed myself, making it look like accidents or illnesses, others I simply conspired against so that Aro dismissed them quickly; either way seeing them broken was always one of the sweetest pleasures in my life. I don't know if Aro ever suspected me, if he did he never said anything nor showed anything.

Having little by little lost his hopes in that yearned-for child, he focused on increasing his power, something he seemed to do effortlessly. After suffocating a coven that tried to rise against him nobody dared criticize anything he did. Those of us who had been loyal to him for a long time, such as Demetri, Chelsea, my brother and me, were able to make our way up the hierarchy of the guard. With time our talents grew stronger, which increased our influence, and by the time Alec and I celebrated our 200th anniversary with the Volturi we were as feared and powerful as we were untouchable.

With this growing political relevance we had to learn not only to hunt or kill or torture, but also how to do it with grace and discretion in order not to compromise the Volturi's public image. For that, obviously, there was no teacher better than Aro. I watched him, and talked to him, drinking in his every word. What amazed me the most about him was that he could crush whoever and whatever he liked with extreme elegance. My style was harsher, quicker perhaps, but it could certainly risk the reputation Aro so cared for. We worked together on my self-control, but we weren't getting very far. What Aro said clashed with what Caius had taught me years ago: the strength, the authority, how disposable lives were.

He often worked with Chelsea; her power to erase love ties between people was useful to dispose of just the right people without causing too much trouble. However, it had a drawback: it wore off. Like most of the talents that dealt with feelings, Chelsea's required her presence to have its full strength, once the person was set free the old relationship gradually came back, with feelings, emotions, and pain

As time passed I noticed something relieving but depressing at the same time: people did not believe in monsters anymore. Witches, vampires, and werewolves were becoming myth with a surprising speed. On one side I was happy to know that we would be less at risk of being hunted (not that we were ever in danger; humans always caught their own, the innocent), but it did anger me that they were losing respect for us, considering us part or a fantasy tale instead of a very real, a very present threat. We were a joke to them now.

There was only one thing that really frustrated me: I had always wanted to see the New World and Aro wouldn't allow it. It had been so long since it had been taken and revealed, even before I became a vampire, yet I had never had the chance to see it with my very own eyes. After hearing wonder after wonder about this so called miraculous land I finally gathered courage to ask Aro for permission.

"Why do you want to go there, my dearest? Are you perhaps unhappy here?"

"No, Master, it is not that. I have heard so much, seen the paintings, heard the stories, that I wish I could see if it is as marvelous as everybody seems to think."

He sighed and fixed his gaze on me. The expression of his face was affectionate, like that of a father. It angered me. Finally, he spoke. "I am very sorry, Jane, but I do not think that it would be the best idea at the moment. Discretion is our priority at the moment, and a journey as complex as that one would represent the danger of our existence being unveiled."

I immediately thought of a thousand ways we could make it work. "But-"

"Everything in due time, my darling. The New World can wait."

I tried to deal with disappointment as well as I could, but it eventually added on to my bitterness. The more something was denied to me, the more I craved it, and I began plotting a way to, someday soon, be able to go where I wanted.

Revolutions and humankind came and went, and we tried our best to survive. And in the end, we did better than our best. People's loss of faith worked in our favour: we could hunt without raising suspicions, we weren't chased anymore, we got the privacy and freedom we'd fought for during centuries. Once our world became a myth to be featured in fantasy books there came a period of peace and calmness, of fearlessness. However, rules were not relaxed in the slightest way. Secrecy, discretion, respect and loyalty were just as enforced as when humans hunted witches with pitchforks and torches. If anything, justice was applied more strongly to remind everyone that they couldn't let their guard down.

But, as is to be expected in any game of power, rules applied to everybody but the one who created them. Aro lived the life he wanted, surrounding himself with art, literature and science that had been produced by humans. He studied them fervently, devouring books and collecting every piece of work he could get his hands on. He loved Bach and was furious when Mozart killed himself. He bought things from humans: clothes, furniture, jewellery. Sometimes he dragged me along in his enthusiasm, making me read Austen or Goethe, and he made me mourn with the murdered women of the Salem trials, revolted as he was by humans and their stupid sadism. He also studied sciences: Math, Physics, Biology, but luckily I managed to stay clear of that.

And the women. Oh, the women. Like I have said before, there were many, many, many women in Aro's life. But they were all mortals, every single one of them, and he never laid eyes on any vampire, though he could have easily seduced any one he liked. Yet, he preferred his humans, and he enjoyed them in a way I was never able to understand. I wonder what he would have done to any other immortal who toyed so dangerously with them, but, of course, there was no punishment for him. He pampered them, buying them all sorts of pretty things, making them feel like queens for a few months, and then tossing them away. They never resented it, though, because the experience and the riches they got were enough of a compensation. I was never able to understand what he saw in them.

The Volturi were, now more than ever, the symbol of power and strength, the safe point that all vampires knew would keep them protected. To the eyes of our society, we were absolutely respectable and the image of prudence. We were hated by some, yes, perhaps more than was convenient, but everyone knew better than to interfere and if they ever considered it, they knew they would be the ones to lose. No matter how they saw it, the line was clearly drawn and the Volturi were royalty.

Then, for some time, Aro stopped frequenting his girls and focused on establishing his power. No one would dispute it, but, like the politician he was, he knew nothing was ever safe. He had us running errands, visiting old acquaintances, scaring old rivals. Aro made sure the Volturi were always fresh in people's minds, our authority and magnificence a permanent breath down their necks. Those were perhaps our most active years.

And then one morning, all of a sudden, a letter arrived.

"Oh! It's from Carlisle!" exclaimed Aro, delighted. Alec and I looked at each other and rolled our eyes. No matter how virtuous he seemed, we had never quite liked the man. "He says he has finished his medical studies and has found a job at a hospital. Well, it was about time, our dear friend has been studying for over sixty years!" Aro laughed. "Oh my. It seems that he got his wish, our Carlisle. He'll be working directly with humans, helping them out, _saving their lives!_" again, the laughter. "This is fascinating. You know what? I think we should pay him a visit."

"You do?" asks Marcus, completely uninterested in Aro's answer.

"Yes. This is something we should appreciate in person. Let me see… he says here that he has plans of moving to America to work. The job he found is there. Well, well, well, it seems that you will get your little wish sooner than we thought, Jane, sweetheart."

"Master?" I ask, thoroughly confused.

"You'll be coming with me, of course! Just think of the possibilities with you and me together in the New World. There is so much to be learned, darling one. I suppose we should give him some time to get settled, though, before we pay him a visit. Still, we are going to America."

It would still be a year before we actually began our journey, but getting to know an entirely new world would shift my perspectives in many more ways than I ever thought possible.


	28. In America

**In America**

We travelled the only way it was possible back then: by ship. It was as absurd as it was practical: using the same concept as when Alec and I organized the party and hunted down humans to keep until we needed them, we captured as many people as we could and stored them in the lower part of the ship to keep us sustained during the journey. It was a small party: Aro, Chelsea, Demetri, my brother and me. Considering the size of our whole household, it wasn't a big group. Demetri found the best ship there was, fast as only she could be, and we set on this adventure.

It didn't take as long as expected, perhaps because of Demetri's good taste in ship, and the humans we took were more than enough. Setting foot for the first time in the New World was an experience I don't think I could ever forget. I don't know what my first impression was: although we arrived in the dead of the night, in the middle of winter in what is New York today, the atmosphere was loud, there was people working, going around, living. Nothing to compare to my usually quiet surroundings, with Volterrans in bed before midnight, and everybody minding their own business. No, this place was truly alive, and had undoubtedly left Europe behind.

It was the first time for all of us; the New World was truly and absolutely new. Out of pride we all tried our best to hide our amazement, but every single thing we found seemed exciting and tempting. Carlisle lived a little deeper inside the land, but we took a detour to absorb as much as we could of this new atmosphere. It was all so different from everything we'd know, everything we had grown up with, everything we had seen rise and change during centuries. Even blood tasted different here. Stronger, somehow. Those who had tasted wine and coffee in their human lives made that comparison, the subtle difference in essence and body of the drink. However, though I enjoyed the flavour in the end I decided I preferred the softer, sweeter taste of European blood. Only the children were more or less the same in both lands, and as always their blood was my comfort while away from home.

After taking our time to look around the country we finally made it to the town where Carlisle had settled. He had done himself well, Carlisle. It turned out that he had been living in the New World for quite some time before reporting to the Volturi, and in those years he had built himself quite a reputation as a doctor. He was respected in the town, even loved. When he saw us he didn't seem surprised, though we had never announced we would be visiting him. He had grown to know us well during his years in Volterra.

"Aro. Dearest friend. Thank you for coming."

"Carlisle!" said my Master. "How delightful it is to see you again."

Carlisle turned to me. "Hello, Jane. Beautiful as always." He bowed his head and kissed my hand. But I knew the man well, and was aware of the fact that he had never liked me. I could see the coldness behind that polite veil. Oh well, let him do as he pleases. He didn't have too big a place in my heart, either.

Fashion trends were difficult when it came to vampires: our unchanging nature made it very difficult to follow the ever shifting trends in haute couture, and we were uncomfortable with subjecting to human views on aesthetics. Many of us wore robes or cloaks, while others, still nostalgic about the time they were originally born in, stuck to clothes in that style. But no matter what we liked to wear, once we found a style we did not change it. That is why it was so weird and funny to see Carlisle perfectly dressed after the current trends. He really was trying to blend in with humans, as if such a thing was even possible. I was never able to decide if I was amused or angry about that: on one side I found it degrading for a vampire to try to match humans, to try to look like them, to try to _be_ one of them. But on the other I knew that if there was someone who didn't resemble a vampire, that was Carlisle. He had never been one of us, and it was because of that that I could forgive him for lowering himself.

Carlisle's house was refined and elegant, discreet like its owner, but already showing the signs of a growing wealth. I admired his taste in decoration: he had only the finest, but never showing off and never overdoing it. He led us into a living room, wide and well lit by the sun. Aro gestured for me to sit at his feet while the rest of the guard stepped back.

Aro and Carlisle talked for a very long time. In their own weird way they had missed each other, and the conversation did them good. My brother, Demetri and Chelsea left to give them privacy, but Aro requested that I stayed by his side. To be honest, I would have preferred to go with the rest; just to imagine them hunting or exploring made me feel envious, and being without Alec was always uncomfortable. However, I appreciated that Aro was giving me a special spot with him: every second I got to spend with him was treasured, even if it meant listening to Carlisle's conversation.

"These are tough times. There is talk of revolution and independence everywhere."

"Independence from England? That is never going to happen!"

"I don't know, Aro, not anymore. It seems now like it could actually be possible. This world is changing much too fast and anything that might slow it down will quickly be thrown away. The Colonies aren't taking England's new measures too well, and they will stand against them."

"But even if war did break out, I am sure that England would never lose these colonies. It is too powerful a nation."

"Even the mightiest can fall. If the rumours are true, then this will really be quite a fight, and, depending on the alliances formed, the outcome could favour either side. People here are strong, and determined. It wouldn't surprise me if they managed to get their independence from England, if they, with time, become more powerful, even."

Aro was thoughtful, considering Carlisle's words and all the probabilities. I could tell he understood the other meaning as well, that of people standing up to a long-time authority and trying to recover their autonomy. Maybe some vampires would try to follow the example set before them, after all, if some silly humans could change such a situation, why couldn't they? I quickly began forming plans to reassure our power, which I would present to my Master for his approval.

"Well," he said. "If war does break out measures will have to be taken in order to protect our kind. Have you by any chance happened to meet another immortal in these lands?"

"Only the occasional wanderer, no one with a permanent settlement. Don't worry, Aro, it will take more than this to even scratch our society."

"May you be right, dearest Carlisle. I have to confess I fear the day when human weapons and development grow strong enough to even threaten our kind. I have seen so many changes throughout the millennia that I can't help but be worried. It is sad, but soon there will be a day when they, the mortals, begin to represent a danger to _us_."

The sky had grown dark while they chatted. I felt my throat grow dryer and more uncomfortable. The not so distant scents of humans near the house weren't helping at all. Aro patted my head softly, letting me know that he was aware of my discomfort, but at the same time promising comfort.

"And… have you thought about… love? Is there anyone who has touched that peculiar heart of yours, Carlisle?"

Carlisle smiled, but to me it looked like a rather forced gesture. "Oh, no. There is so much to do right now, the hospital, this revolution everyone keeps talking about. Creating a vampire would be highly irresponsible at the moment."

"But… you seem lonely, my friend. Haven't you considered the possibility of creating a companion? Perhaps not a mate, but simply someone to spend time with? A friend? A brother?"

I knew Aro. He hardly ever invited vampires to join the guard unless they were truly gifted; Aro was more the kind to _create_ vampires according to his needs. He had a very special way of knowing who would be useful to him, a sixth sense beyond his mind-reading. He was only immensely brilliant, and had a wonderful notion of politics. Aro created and disposed of people according to convenience and personal wishes. For him, creating someone to satisfy a need was routine, and he couldn't understand why Carlisle insisted on being so lonely and miserable when he had the solution within reach.

Carlisle smiled kindly and patiently. "I think humanity is precious, Aro. The ability to grow, to learn, to develop, that's wonderful. I wouldn't have the heart to steal such a gift from anyone."

"Not even for a greater gift?"

Carlisle sighed. "I'm not sure if it would be an improvement. Sometimes I find myself wishing I could go back to being human. Immortality is a burden, a rather heavy one, and very tiring. One must give up a lot of things, and no one deserves to be imposed such sacrifice. No, I think I will wait. Perhaps one day I will find a companion, but it will have to be someone who has no other choice but this life. As long as there is another way, I shall not touch a life."

The rest of the conversation went in essentially the same way. There were branches of knowledge they were both interested on, and Aro listened avidly to Carlisle's recent findings in his medical research. In exchange he brought news from the most celebrated painters and writers in Europe, and even presented him with Voltaire's newest manuscripts. Once the topics weren't personal anymore they both seemed more comfortable, and they relaxed.

If I had been human, I would have fallen asleep. Generally I enjoyed this kind of talking –listening to the Trio arguing these very same ideas was fascinating, but the doctor had something that bored me to death. It wasn't someone I enjoyed, and if I managed to endure the endless hours of talk was only because of Aro, of the pleasure of kneeling on the soft rug at his feet and the feeling of his hand as he stroked my hair. When, finally, the visit was over, I knew it had been worth it.

"Now, my darling," said Aro once we were out of the house, "how about you and I hunt together?"

I was shocked to hear this. Never, ever, had he asked me something like that. "Master?"

"Yes, Janette. I have heard that watching you hunt is a most peculiar experience. I would like to see that for myself. Shall we, dearest?"

We did, of course. In those times it was still safe to hunt outside, on our own, and it was something quite enjoyable. Hunting was our nature, we were predators, ready to track, to kill, and the power, the authority, the control we felt when we played our true role had no comparison. Things have changed since then, naturally, and exercising our natural right to hunt humans carries now a mortal danger, but we took advantage of it while we could.

Ad hunting with Aro offered an entirely new variety of experiences and sensations. He knew I liked children, of course he did, and he made sure we found the very best, lovely little children with beautiful faces and adorable gestures, with dimples and soft hair, children who were still wide-eyed toddlers capable of trusting a smile and a handful of sweets. Only Alec was better at guessing my likings and preferences, and I deeply enjoyed the children Aro pointed out, to the point that sometimes I forgot I had an audience. This earned a delighted smile from my Master.

"They were all right –watching you _is_ fascinating. Tell me, Jane, what is it that you like from them? The taste? The feeling? The simple and perverse amusement of destroying a life before it starts?"

It was all of those things. A child's blood was somehow purer, unpolluted, cleaner. The taste was very sweet, fragrant, and, though addictive, it never made me lose myself, it never made me lose control. A child's blood made me stronger, more powerful, it helped my talent work better, and it seemed unbelievable to me that such potency could come from such soft and tender bodies. I wasn't sure of what I actually felt when I killed the children, though, and as I tried to find the answer it surprised me to see that I actually felt nothing. No remorse, no worry, no sadness, no nothing. I enjoyed killing them and never stopped to think about the situation I was creating, the parents of those children, the void. For me, it was pure pleasure.

"You are sadistic, Jane," Aro determined. "Sadistic, and cruel and heartless as well. I like that. Never allow yourself to grow a heart, Jane, it is the worst pain imaginable."

As for Aro, I discovered that he had a liking for girls' blood as well as for their bodies. But it was strange, for he preferred either very young girls or fully bloomed women; the type he seduced was right between the type he fed on. It seemed as if he sought to cover every single variety of women possible, either by killing or by lovemaking. It was then my turn to seek the best of them, the girls that I sensed would be the most pleasant to my Master's taste; it was strangely comforting to know that he would enjoy them in his veins and not in his bed. The expression of his face as he bit them and drank from them let me know that I'd made the right choices.

It proved to be an amazing journey, one that fulfilled my every expectation. After visiting Carlisle we dedicated a few weeks to see the rest of the land: the way people lived, this new and strange organization of life, and the way these people were already standing out and standing up. Though England's influence was palpable in every corner this was a land that had begun to take its own shape, for those who inhabited it now were no longer the ones that had originally arrived; they had been born in America and considered themselves true Americans, this was their homeland and this was where their loyalty was. Luckily, the immortals didn't follow the same line of thought. There were of course those who had been born and transformed in this new land, but their creators measured their life in centuries, and had taught their covens well. They were respectful, and feared us all the more because they had never seen us, so we were like the ghosts and monsters of their childhood. Once we showed them what we were like, and that royalty was ready to travel, to face seas and dominate every corner of our world and our society, they would never turn against us.

However, as much as I liked the New World I knew it wasn't my place. The virtues that I found charming now were sure to irritate me in the long run: it was too vibrant, too noisy, too chaotic, and I knew I wouldn't stand such a hectic lifestyle. That is why I was glad to leave, carrying with me a pleasant memory. Home was indeed comforting, the sight of the castle, the gardens, the usual and sweeter-tasting blood. We were done with travelling for a while and, having my curiosity finally satisfied, I didn't resent coming back and staying home. Besides, Carlisle proved to be right and eventually the war broke out. First the Revolution, and then it all took shape and became a real battle for the independence of all thirteen Colonies. To our immense surprise, England lost and the United States of America were officially recognized. Many of our household were English, had even helped to conquer the continent, and felt therefore hurt or betrayed. But there were worse things to worry about, things that caught up with us sooner than we would have liked.


	29. Evolution

**Evolution**

The world seemed to move much faster after that. Once one society stood up and began to change, many soon followed. Most of the New Continent began to rebel against those who had colonized them some three hundred years ago. I admired their spirit, but I couldn't understand it. To me, authority meant safety, protection, assurance. I couldn't really see why anyone would attack those who had provided for them and given them steadiness for so long; still, though I had originally predicted none of those colonies would make it on their own, they managed to survive, and it wasn't long before anyone could see they would surpass their original colonizers.

All this, of course, meant changes in our own system. Humans were braver and stronger now, and less afraid. We no longer felt safe in this changing world; curiously enough we felt more threatened by the new scepticism and carelessness than by the superstitious, paranoid townsfolk. This new race we didn't know how to deal with.

Word was sent around clans to be extra careful. It was impossible to know how far these humans would go in their search for adventure and new experiences, and therefore how dangerous they could turn out to be. The situation left us so intrigued and confused that it called for a stronger, more permanent decision, and the inner circle of power within the Volturi set to work. A council meeting brought us to a tough decision: we would go into hiding for an undefined period of time.

"These humans are new," said Caius. "They are completely different from those we met in our time," he gestured at his brothers and himself, "and even very different from humans our younger ones first met," he turned to Alec, Demetri, to me. "They might not notice the change, but we certainly do. It's almost a new species, and until we figure out exactly how they think we should retreat."

"But why should we?" said Demetri. "These people are losing their faith, their capacity to believe. They wouldn't see us even if we stood right before them, glittering skin and all. They are too modern to see the world around them. They are too blind and stupid."

"Stupidity is even more dangerous, Demetri," said Aro. "It has been proved time and time again that the worst damages are caused by mistakes, confusions, misunderstandings, or sheer foolishness. We need to be smarter than them. Let's retreat safely and watch them destroy each other from afar."

"There is, however, a lot to be considered in this new system" intervened Marcus. "Our whole dynamic will have to change. Yes, Alec?"

"This rule… Does it apply to all clans or just us?"

The Trio looked at each other and Caius answered.

"I think it would be prudent to notify other clans. Tell the most prominent ones and ensure word spreads. People need to be aware of the fact that this is actually a crisis and dangers should not be underestimated."

"That is very good. Demetri, you and Felix are in charge of contacting coven leaders. There are a lot of things to take into account for this. For one, most of our travelling will have to be suspended unless absolutely necessary. Needless to say, law will be more than strict. Tolerance zero. No indiscretion shall be tolerated. Demetri, make sure everyone gets the message."

"There is another matter," said my brother, "which is indispensable and will be threatened by this new lifestyle. How are we going to feed?"

There was a silence in the table. The weight of what he said floated heavy in the air: if we went practically into hiding hunting would be out of the question, and we evidently couldn't just not hunt. Something needed to be done in order to provide food for the entire, rather large household while keeping our work in the utmost discretion.

"There is something… Jane and Alec did it once… perhaps if…"

We all turned to Demetri, Alec and I exchanging looks of strangeness.

"Yes, you did something, for that party when the human girl saw us. You brought all those humans as snacks, and you said you'd kept them stored somewhere."

"Yes," I said slowly. "But what about it? How can that help us?"

"Storage," said Alec. "Mass-hunting and storage. That would allow us to get enough food to sustain us all for a certain amount of time, all in one single hunt. Yet…"

"…how?" I continued my brother's train of thought. "No illnesses now to disguise our massacres under. We cannot blame the loss of a whole village to the plague or some fever anymore."

"There are wars going on."

"But that would only give us an excuse for men."

"Which is good enough. This is a crisis, Jane, and we will probably have to go outside our comfort zone. Life isn't all about fresh toddlers, you know."

I rolled my eyes.

"We still need an effective strategy," intervened Aro, rescuing me. "The basic idea is good: hunting a lot of humans and bringing them here instead of tracking them down. That would save time and ensure privacy. Now, let's think: how can we possibly catch them, lure them, trap them?"

There were some minutes of silence, and then we began discussing several options.

"Refugees. Countries are at war, after all, and people are fleeing. We can pretend to be some sort of organization that takes people to safer places. Then they would come on their own accord, in large groups, and would be easily led here. By the time they realized what this is really about it would be too late."

"What about travellers? They're always eager to explore, and if we offer them tours around this area they would be thrilled. Perhaps we could form these groups and make them believe they will spend all day enjoying the Tuscany. And, of course, a visit to an ancient castle would be included. They wouldn't know the truth until there's not a drop of blood left in them."

"Could we set some sort of place? Business? I mean, something like an orphanage, something that could permanently provide us with food, and where disappearances would never raise suspicions, on the contrary, would almost be expected."

This went on for hours. There could be no room for any failure; one unattended detail would reveal us for what we were. Eventually, we settled for travellers, for in their ignorance of the area, the landscape, they would be easier to catch and lure

"We need someone good looking, someone who people would be attracted to and trust. Someone they'd follow."

"A girl, then. One of our girls would lure them easily. Jane?"

"I'm not the kind people easily trust. My cover wouldn't last."

"In that you're right, sister. You stand out. You're too special," Alec squeezed my hand. "I think that we need someone new. The girls here with us are either already busy with higher tasks, such as Chelsea or Jane, or not exactly ideal for the task. Could we bring someone new? Like hiring?"

The Trio considered that for a moment. "There is one," said Marcus finally, "who might be willing to do this job, and she meets our requirements. It would only be a matter of visiting her and asking."

Caius's eyes lit up. "Heidi?"

"Yes, her. I think she meets our profile, and it wouldn't take too much to convince her. I could go and talk to her."

"Marcus, don't you bother with such trivial matters. We'll send somebody to get her."

"Oh, but she knows me, Aro, and that would help. Besides, her creator is a friend of mine."

"Well then, so be it. I'm sure she will join us. Let's hope for the best."

Obviously, Heidi agreed gladly and Marcus came back with her. She was exactly suited for our purposes and after a pilot attempt and much polishing of the system we managed to get a functional structure, where she played bait and hunter and brought home small groups of people, large enough to feed us but discreet enough that they wouldn't draw too much attention. Over the years this was even more perfected.

"Happy Anniversary! Happy Anniversary!"

As it happens, all of a sudden Alec and I found ourselves celebrating our 300th anniversary with the Volturi. We had been transformed in 1516, and now, as the world dawned on 1816 I wasn't quite able to recall when so much time had gone by. I felt strangely young, full of life, and I had never felt the passing of the years.

All in all, I had led a happy life. Those who had hurt or angered me had invariably paid for their offense, I was well-known, respected, or feared among everybody else. I had my brother, who was the light of my life, the one person who knew me inside out, with my secrets, my sorrows, my shames, my fears, my prides and my joys, and who I knew just as well. There was that other thing, of course, that I had never been able to quite solve or get over, but I tried to ignore it as I did the recap of these centuries in the Volturi household. We had reached the highest ranks, Alec and I, we held the utmost power and controlled a great part of the inner politics of this organization.

In celebration of this anniversary the Trio broke their own laws as to the new discretion and retreat (which had already lasted five years) and threw a grand ball, much like the one where the whole disaster with Mariette had taken place. Mariette. How long had it been since Mariette, a hundred years? Eighty? I had no idea, at least it had been long enough for me to find no feelings about her inside my heart, if I had such a thing. I had buried her and forgotten her.

On to the ball. Oh, it was a huge thing, elegant, graceful, with taste and style. Some special guests were there, friends of Aro who had been loyal and pretty much peaceful during the years I'd known them. Friends of mine there were none, for I was never too interested in cultivating such relationships, I had my brother and that was enough for me. Plus, we had quite a reputation as dark creatures; the fact that some called us "the witch twins" behind our backs was not unknown to us. But we didn't invite those, and the ball was one of the most enjoyable experiences of those decades.

Our protection agreement had turned out quite successful. With Heidi's help and Demetri's supervision there soon had been a coordinated plan to attract, catch, bring, kill, and dispose of endless bodies, a handful at a time. After our thirst was quenched we burned them in a big pile, in which we threw wood, paper, and herbs to mask the unmistakable smell of human flesh burning. I was never present in the act itself, for it reminded me of another time, another fire, another little girl burning. However, I had to accept it was a brilliant system. It was that which allowed us to enjoy the feast that night.

Aro kissed me on the lips and hugged me.

"Well done, little one. I'm so proud of you." He looked at Alec and pulled him into our hug. After Aro, both Marcus and Caius, and other members of the guard congratulated us. It seemed that they were genuinely pleased with us, with our work, with who we were. That filled me with immense pride, for I wanted nothing but their approval and to know I had it was wonderful. More than anything, I wanted _his_ approval. His support. And I had it. And my life was complete.

Alec offered me his arm and we went to one of the balconies of the castle. I saw in his eyes that he was just as content as I was, and our shared joy doubled.

"When did all these years go by? " he asked, sighing. "I feel like it was just yesterday when we arrived here. And yet, it's been three hundred years. I mean… who would have thought? The strangers, the outsiders, the drunkard's kids with the ever sick mother, the witches, the nobodies. And look at us!"

"Look at us indeed. We're survivors, Alec. We defied everything and everyone, we defied Life itself and look where we are now, how far we've got."

"It's all been for the best. I do regret some things, but I think that if we had another chance we would still do them the same way." He sighed. "We have clear goals, we know what we want and how to get it. And Jane," he turned to face me and held my hand, "I want you to know that I'm very proud of you. I was proud when you were a little girl and you pretty much supported our whole family, when you cooked, cleaned, cared after our mother. I was proud when you fought the bastards who accused and imprisoned us. I was so proud when you designed and executed our revenge. And I'm so proud to see you now, so beautiful, so strong, valued among our kind. I'm honoured to be your brother."

I hugged him, tight, tight, tight, the way we liked to hug . I felt the soft velvet of his cloak against my cheek, and the even softer touch of his hair. Our arms were around each other, together the same way we'd been born, the way we were always meant to be. And I told him I loved him, I told him I was just as proud of him. I wouldn't have done anything, anything at all if it hadn't been for him, if I hadn't had him by my side. He was my support and my comfort, my joy and my light, the one person I knew I could rely on no matter what. We had shared a womb, there was a special connection between us that could never break.

"And you always helped with the house duties," I reminded him. "You were a wonderful cook."

He laughed. Finally, we broke our embrace so that we could look at each other properly. Then he offered me his arm again and we returned to the hall, where we danced for the rest of the night.


	30. Battles

**Battles**

The world rushed by and soon, polluted by human wars and other nonsense, conflicts among our kind began to form. Word reached us from the New World, from the now called United States, that several covens were fighting for territory in the South. Immediately, Felix was sent to find out what exactly was going on, and came back describing these wars as "petty fights of spoiled children". The Trio was relieved after hearing this, but they still sent a small brigade to keep an eye on the fighting covens.

"It's a good thing to have these wars, for that way we will easily get rid of unnecessary vampires around and the population will stay under control" Caius explained to me. "They just have to be watched because some of them are too stupid to kill each other discreetly."

We kept in touch with the squad that had gone to Texas by that wonderful new thing, the telegraph, which had appeared a handful of years ago. Aro, always eager to learn and to explore, had immediately found a way to have our own, private system, so that messages flowed efficiently and safely. The Trio was always kept informed about these battles, and sometimes decided that they had to be ended before drawing too much attention; conflictive covens were then found and eradicated before they could awaken any suspicions. Luckily for them, the United States began to feel the need to be constantly at war (a need they still have nowadays, though what glory they can find in such a thing remains a mystery to me), and decided to fight each other. The Secesion War helped covens to fight, and to supply themselves with new soldiers, without having to justify any disappearances or damage.

Both humans and vampires continued their stupid wars. I watched, amused at first, but then it became a common spectacle. Over the centuries I had learned that everyone was disposable, and everything as well: there wasn't a human that wouldn't eventually die, a building that wouldn't eventually fall

Around those years, late 1800s, Aro decided he wanted to "catch up with the world" and decided to travel all around, to visit all sorts of places, from the most modern to the most exotic, the most remote and the closest. For that massive trip, he took Alec and me along. I saw so much, learned so much during that trip, that there was little left to surprise me after it. He had once denied me the opportunity to go out and see the world, now he seemed to want to make up for it. My brother and I took the most advantage of that trip

We visited Carlisle again, to find him a brilliant, prestigious surgeon in New York. I could see some inner conflict in Aro: on one side of course he wanted his friend to succeed, there was pride in the way he looked at him and congratulated him upon hearing of his achievements. On the other, though, everything Carlisle did was strange and weird to him, a defiance against our deeper, truer nature, and he failed to understand why someone would deny his true condition and cause himself such pain just because.

It took us almost two years to return home, and I realized how much I had actually missed it. I could see that, as always,

It was around those years that he decided he wanted to try again to get that child of his. He didn't tell anyone, but it was obvious: after years of not paying attention to women suddenly they were all that mattered, and he chose them not for their beauty or other charms I knew he sought when he only wanted fun, but for their health, their strength, the physical attributes a woman must have in order to successfully bear a child. I was caught in my eternal dilemma: on one side I wanted him to have that kid he so desperately craved, I wanted him to get the last piece missing from his happiness, yet I knew that should he get what he needed I would lose him forever. Whoever managed to bear his child would be adored by him, favoured and loved beyond imagination, and there would be nothing for me to compete with. I could never give him his greatest wish. And for that, just for that, because if I didn't have the chance then no one else would, it was that I continued sabotaging his girls.

Luckily for me, I didn't have to get involved in every single failure, for even in these modern times pregnancies were still risky, and his girls often died of complications.

"I don't think Aro will be able to bear this much longer," said Caius to me a day after we found out Aro's new girl had died. "He's furious, he's frustrated, he's disappointed. This kid had already reached the fifth month, and all was going well until yesterday. Miscarriage! Haemorrhage! How can this still be possible? We're in the XIX century, for crying out loud! These humans have a thousand new ways to kill people, but haven't devised a single one to save a child's life. Aro is tired. This has been going on for so long… I don't know how much he can take before he finally gives up."

I was very worried, too. Aro had been increasingly irritable, and more explosive. I had lost count of all the girls I had seen during my time with the Volturi, and I knew there had been many more in the centuries before.

As the little wars in the south of Texas became increasingly strong Aro finally found a distraction. These people were rioting and fighting in such an imprudent manner that it was hard to believe. The Secesion War had been over for a long time, yet the vampires were battling just as viciously. Without the cover of the war their activities were more and more evident, which put us all at risk. The struggle for territory and power between these covens was brutal, vicious, and costly in all senses. We heard about a leader, María, who was systematically creating soldiers: her idea was to have entirely disposable elements to throw, eliminate and replace as she saw fit. The strategy gave her excellent results, and it was soon copied; however, many lacked the organizational skills she possessed and their experiments became riots. What in María became great conquests of territory in others became a simple bloodbath. The situation worsened to the point that personal intervention.

To tell the truth, I was relieved and even glad when this problem arose. It took Aro's mind off the recent failures, and gave him a chance to use his power and smooth it all out, which I knew he loved. His display of authority was quite effective, as was my power of torture, which I hadn't had the chance to use lately, and which provided much-needed relaxation. I don't specially enjoy war, though the victory and use of power of course delighted me, but when Caius had trained me, so long ago, he had said that my one weakness would always be the one-on-one combat, for I was too small, and I relied too much on my talent, so if for any reason I wasn't able to use the torture instantly and correctly, my size would be a terrible disadvantage, as were my clumsy techniques. I wasn't born a physical fighter, and that is why I always tried to avoid such encounters.

It took us a week to reinstate order among the messy clans and their troops. Of course, the fighting would continue, but now they knew where they belonged and how they should behave. On our journey back I was pleased and relieved to see Aro in a much better mood, with a brighter outlook. He decided to take a break, focus on learning instead. There were books being written, discoveries being made, technology being developed, and he didn't want to miss any of that. There was currently work going on so that electricity could be brought into the houses as a new lifestyle ("Just think, my lovely one, not to rely on candles and sunlight anymore!"). His tours and travels continued, and it wasn't rare for him to sponsor this man or another so that he could continue his research. One time he sponsored a girl who was passionate about physics and even provided her with a secret place to do her experiments, for society was still much too harsh with women who wanted to stand up on their own. The girl was forever grateful and remained a good friend to Aro for the rest of her life.

As the century came to an end several things caught Aro's attention. It seemed that humankind was coming closer and closer to fulfilling the always-cherished dream of flying: there were now machines with motors that could leave the ground for a few seconds. Aro would chase the public demonstrations of such devices, often taking me along.

"Watch this, Janette," he would say, pointing at the winged things hovering above the people. "In a couple of years they will be stable and functioning properly, and then they will be able to take people. Who knows, maybe they'll even cross the ocean!" he laughed, delighted. "Once these things have fully bloomed, I promise I will buy you one."

There was another thing that sparked his interest, a machine called _automobile. _It was some sort of motorized vehicle, a carriage that required no horse, but a kind of fuel. People said it was faster, and safer, and that it would in no time be the only method of transportation. Like the flying machines, it was still in the early stages and was at the moment tremendously expensive, but it was just a matter of time before these inventions really changed the world. And when that happened, Aro would be there. There was nothing in the world he wanted and didn't have, and he was always the first one (quite often the only one) to get it.

Oh, except that kid of his. And that idea, though he hid it well, still tormented him day after day. He still wouldn't openly discuss the matter with me, but that didn't keep me from finding out exactly how distressed he was.

"By now I should… by now I should have succeeded, don't you think?" I heard him say to Marcus one night. "By now I should even have more than one! More like two, three, perhaps four! It can't be that difficult, can it?"

"Have you heard of anyone succeeding before?"

There was a moment of silence. "Well, no. Not with a certainty. But that doesn't mean it's impossible, I mean, there are the stories, the legends. The girls I have tried with have actually conceived, Marcus, it's just that they're unable to finish the pregnancy. My God, how many have there been! And not one of them, not even one, has been able to give me what I want. They seem to be too weak to handle it, or too different from my nature. I don't know what else to do."

Neither man spoke for a while. Then Marcus sighed and finally said. "Well, Aro, and what would you do with a child?"

"I… well, I… I do need an heir…"

"An heir? But Aro, that is for when one dies, to ensure that what you have built will go on. You certainly won't be dying anytime soon."

"Still. I want someone like me who I can prepare, someone who will follow my steps, someone I can be proud of. There are two strong bonds that can be formed between vampires: between creator and transformed, and between mates. These are supposed to be the strongest there could ever be, but I'm sure a blood tie would be the most powerful of them all."

"So you're experimenting. And at the same time that you experiment you want someone who would be absolutely loyal to you, obedient, someone who would only follow your lead."

"Not only that. I really think that with this I could build a sort of dynasty. If there's me, and my children, the power would be more solid. No one would dispute us, for there would be a big base, with people who would undoubtedly be loyal to this organization. Foreign threats would know better than to attack, for they would have no chance of getting anyone on their side."

"That's all?" asked Marcus doubtfully.

Aro half sighed, half-laughed. "You know me too well. I… I don't like people having something I don't. Men often rely greatly on their children, it is said that they are a great joy and comfort. I want such a thing. I want someone I can trust without fear of betrayal. And I want someone that's truly, absolutely mine, someone I know I made and who belongs to me without a doubt. I want that feeling, I need it."

It was a whim. It was nothing but a whim. He'd seen something other people like and have, and he wanted it. He couldn't stand competition, he couldn't stand thinking someone is better than him, and that's why he would fight at all costs to be on top. And he wass so driven by this thirst that he would end up doing something crazy to get the kid. I was terrified. For the first time in centuries, I was honestly scared.


	31. Of Course

**Of Course**

"I know you're looking."

"I'm not!"

I walked carefully, trying not to stumble while Aro's hands covered my eyes. He moved behind me, guiding my steps and making sure I didn't see a thing. In all, he was being very childish, playful, certainly excited about something, and it was all very baffling to me.

"Here. You can look now."

His hands disappeared and I was finally able to open my eyes. Before me stood five machines, black, glossy, elegant, and very expensive-looking. There were wheels on them, but not like the ones in the carriages; these were of another, stronger material.

"They're beautiful," I said. "What are they?"

"They're automobiles."

I turned to him. "What?"

"Automobiles. Don't you remember the mechanics fair we went to the other day?"

The other day? Oh, that was twenty-five years ago. There were some machines similar to the ones I was now looking at, though of course not so advanced.

"They come from the United States. It's the newest model.

"This one is yours," he said.

"What?"

"This automobile belongs to you. I ordered it specially. Come on, try it."

I went inside the car. The seats were made of soft black leather, the whole interior was shiny and smelled of new, it was the climax of elegance. I loved it, I loved it immensely, and loved Aro all the more for thinking of me.

Aro's gift provided me with much-needed amusement. Felix taught me to drive and then I taught my brother. I really loved my car

"Sir, there is a new letter from you," Alec handed the envelope and came to my side. I held his hand and meanwhile Aro opened the letter.

"Oh, it's from Carlisle!" he said excitedly, and began to read. "Let's see… oh my… this is wonderful!" Aro's happiness was such that everybody turned around to see him. "He's married!"

The surprise in his face was then in everyone's. Carlisle, married? The loner, the one so ashamed of himself that he never talked to anyone in order not to expose himself, the one who swore he would never turn anyone into what he was. And now he was married. Well, that had to be an interesting story. Aro began to read parts of the letter.

" 'Her name is Esme… she'd been about to die, she'd even been taken to the morgue. I had treated her ten years ago, when she was little more than a child. I remembered her, and then… It was too much waste, a girl so young, I just had to do something… We got married last year, and now she wants to work in the hospital with me; she's trying to perfect her control so that he can join me as soon as possible…' My, my, does he mean to turn his wife into the same repressed creature he is? That's rather cruel. Although, if he says she's trying to control herself, she must have slipped up a couple of times. Good for her, maybe _she'll _be the one to convince him. Oh, I'd like to meet her. We should visit soon. But, what is this? 'Before Esme I transformed someone else, a boy called Edward. His family had died due to the influenza. His mother begged me to save him before she died. I had no choice, I couldn't let him die. He's embraced the same philosophies. He's like a son to me.' So he created someone and didn't inform me? Who does he think he is? I very clearly told him once that should he create a vampire, he should notify us. Now it turns out that he had deliberately disobeyed. I do not like the sound of this."

"Brother, please," intervened Marcus. "Surely you remember how much work it is, incorporating somebody new to the household. I clearly recall that Jane and Alec's preparation took quite a long time, and theirs was easy. This process must have been terribly difficult for Carlisle; you know how he is."

"One vampire more, one less, who cares?" added Caius, who like me had never liked Carlisle. "He doesn't have enough vision to actually build a threat. He's just gotten himself a wife and a kid, the fool. Nothing special. Let him be, he's nothing."

Aro looked doubtful, but I could see he would give in. "All right. We'll see. But a nice reminder never to disobey again would be good. Perhaps we could send someone for a friendly visit?" he looked at Alec and he nodded, indicating he would see to that. "Anyway," he sighed and smiled again. "Isn't it wonderful that our friend has finally found love? I knew there would come a moment when he would be grateful for what he is, and would want to share his future with someone. She must be quite extraordinary, to have enchanted him like that. He, who wished to remain alone forever! Oh, this will be amusing indeed."

However, later on Aro's anger was truly spiked when the guard we sent to check on Carlisle delivered his report:

"The wife, Esme, is quite harmless. Apparently she tried to commit suicide and jumped off a cliff. They believed her dead and took her to the morgue, where the doctor found her. She is rather sweet, and is already working in the hospital alongside Carlisle. If anything, she'll contribute to the peace and discretion of his clan. Yet the boy…"

"What about him?"

"He is quite rebellious and spirited. He might become a problem, eventually. But that's not the worst part. This Edward, he can read minds."

The Trio fell silent. Eventually Caius demanded. "What do you mean, he can read minds? How is such a thing possible?"

"It seems he hears thoughts as if they were voices. He's currently working on controlling it, for apparently he cannot shut the voices out of his head and that is annoying to him."

Aro looked thoughtful, and I could almost hear his brain whirling and running, considering the message and weighing his options. That this required intervention was obvious, but there was no way anyone could act without a solid cause; there could be no punishment without a crime. It was evident from Aro's eyes that he was desperately trying to find one, no matter how small, that justified an investigation.

Whatever happened when Santiago visited Carlisle must have been effective, because another letter arrived a handful of years later, dutifully notifying the incorporation of the fourth member of Carlisle's "family", as he liked to call it: a young girl called Rosalie. He told a bit of her story, a rich and beautiful child who had been betrothed to a banker's son, who had brutally assaulted her, along with four of his friends, a couple of weeks before the wedding. That's when Carlisle had found her, bleeding to death on a deserted street. Just like with his wife and Edward, he had not been able to stand such a waste ("She's so beautiful, and young, barely eighteen. So spirited and strong, I couldn't let her die so horribly.") I pitied the girl, for her fate had been so much worse than mine. Aro was pleased with the news, for then he knew his warning had been strong enough. Sure enough, when Rosalie found a mate she asked Carlisle to transform for her, we knew immediately.

Watching the Cullen clan develop, and increasing the household's fortune in cars and any other technology that emerged was our occupation for some decades. The World Wars had no effect on us whatsoever. The only problem was the Atomic Bomb; everyone who had been there perished, blood drinker or not. Still, the losses weren't that considerable, because the majority of the strong covens and talented elements lived in the wining countries

The next time Carlisle notified us of yet another addition to his coven, it was an ex soldier named Jasper. He took no longer than three months to send the letter, and included a whole description of the boy's nature. This case was peculiar, for he had joined Carlisle when he was already a vampire. He had fought during the American Civil War (a war that we had watched with amusement) and had also joined one of the armies that vampires had organized in the South during their territorial conflicts. He had a talent, too, a human charisma that had evolved into a manipulation of feelings and emotions. According to Carlisle, Jasper was also like a son to him.

"Look at him," said Caius when the news arrived. "He spent three hundred years on his own, claiming he would never impose this nature on anyone else, yet in sixty years he has incorporated five people. He even married! Who would have thought, good old Carlisle, who always took pride in this humanity he claimed to want to preserve. But why, brother," he turned to Marcus, "you look troubled."

"Yes. This worries me. Carlisle has increased his power much too soon for my liking. In less than a century there are five new members, two of which are talented. Then there is the girl, who is said to be extremely beautiful, even for vampire standards, and her mate, a huge boy with exceptional brute force. Though not exactly talents, those charms are powerful, and could be of great help if needed. Then there is the wife, who, even if she doesn't seem to have anything remarkable, is a point of support and comfort to him, someone who will make him more confident. Carlisle is becoming too influential, he's well-liked among those who know him, and I wouldn't be surprised if he begins to have quite a political influence."

There was silence and we looked at each other. The Trio looked thoughtful, Caius and Aro considering their brother's words. There was much truth in that. Carlisle's influence and reputation had increased a lot in just a handful of years. If not properly watched he could become a threat. During the years he spent with us he had said he did not want any high position, any authority; then again, he'd also said he would never transform a human, and there you had four by his own hand. He could no longer be trusted.

"We shall pay him a visit," said Aro, "but us, Caius, Marcus. We need to see with our own eyes the extent of this influence, and these new vampires that seem to be gathering so much admiration. Carlisle was a humble man when he arrived to this household; let's hope that such feelings prevail. If not… well, then we'll see. But I hope for the best. Jane, Alec, Felix, Demetri, I would like you to come along."

We nodded, and the reunion was dismissed to prepare the trip. It was the Trio and the front guard who were going. This was serious. This was a veiled threat, not just for the Cullens, but for their admirers as well. People would hear about this and know where the power lied, they would know better than to mess around where they shouldn't.

This trip was much easier. Some enlightened individual had finally come up with a proper flying machine, and it was now so developed that we could go all the way to Alaska in less than a day, flying over the ocean and to the little place where the Cullens lived discreetly. It was a matter of taking two planes (one for the long trip over the Atlantic and one from the United States to Alaska), private, of course, and we were there in no time. It was wonderful.

I looked closely at Carlisle's new additions. His wife was a young woman, beautiful but with a tender beauty, soft, warm. She looked like any mother would, so ready and willing to care for a dozen kids, and so proud of each of them. She spoke about the young ones she and Carlisle had "adopted" (the very word she used) as if she had given birth to each of them. Their first one, Edward, the famous mind-reader, was very closed and most of the time preferred to keep to himself. Aro touched his hand and saw exactly what he could do, and later explained that Edward could only know what went through someone's mind at the moment, but he could not hear anything from the past, like Aro. Still, he had the huge advantage that he could hear from a distance, without needing the direct touch. One look between Edward and me and we knew we would always hate each other, a silent promise we have kept. But Aro also said that Edward was a rather bitter soul, and that whatever power he could get from his talent was wasted until his views on life improved

The only girl besides Esme was Rosalie, whose beauty seemed to slap you on the face. She was the traditional blonde, tall, slender, curvy. Hers was an exposed beauty, almost aggressive, something that definitely forced you to look at. Still, she didn't seem too vain or arrogant because of these exceptional looks; from what Carlisle had said in his letter this beauty had been her curse, the curse that had let to her being attacked and subsequently transformed to save her life. It was understandable that she didn't feel particularly proud of it. Her mate, an enormous boy called Emmett, was absolutely no threat at all, since his main interests seemed to be hunting, betting, and pleasing his Rosalie.

There were two potential threats. Edward's talent, if he ever chose to put it to use, and Carlisle's growing popularity, along with the rapid increase of his family. He was well liked, and thanks to his wife he had begun making friends, both humans and vampires, which could give him more support in a potential conflict. Seeing this, Aro's approach changed, trying to be in the best of terms with Carlisle's lot. We were still by far the most powerful clan in the whole world, and we were virtually indestructible, yet Aro would take no risks. That was the key of his millenary success: he had never allowed even the slightest hint of risk, quickly wiping out any bad herbs should he ever spot them, and though until now there weren't any in the Cullen household it was better to be on the safe side.

When we returned to Volterra the Trio seemed calmer, though still on their guard. Now that the immediate issue with the Cullens was controlled we could tend to other issues, such as the fact that we were understaffed. We had grown in power, but we needed low-rank personnel to manage the small trifles of the business. It was then when Alec suggested hiring humans. It sounded weird and even scandalous when he first mentioned the idea, but after he explained it made perfect sense. We needed basic elements such as secretaries, administrators, accountants. Humans could be let in on our secret; lured as they would be with the possibility of eventually joining us as vampires themselves they would never disobey or do anything that might damage their chances. They could be used in these trivial chores and then disposed of once they stopped being of any use. That way we could reserve the vampire guards for actual work instead of distracting them with banalities. My brother's idea took some time and refining, but when it was ready and Aro hired his first secretary, Elisabetta, it was obvious he had done the right thing.

The world was now in mid-1990s, light-years away from the era Alec and I had been born in, years even from our last visit to Carlisle. We had killed, lied, tortured, plotted, schemed, and yet our consciences were clear. We had done the right thing for our lifestyle and out loyalties and neither of us regretted one single thing we had ever done; if anything, we felt relieved and perhaps even proud. One night, we sneaked off to hunt. To be perfectly honest, for me there was nothing as comforting, as sweet, as pleasing, than killing. To take someone's life with such impunity, with such carelessness, was the most powerful feeling in the world.

That night, Alec and I made a pact. We had survived all the things that had ever happened to us because we had always been together –birth, growing up, rebirth, learning, fighting, we'd been there for each other. And in the pact we made we swore never to let anything come between us. Not ambition, not power, not someone else. The moment we let something separate us we would be annihilated and done for good. But now we promised never to part in any way, neither physical nor emotional. If we stuck to that we'd be perfect. Of course.

Of course.


	32. The Sunbeam

**The Sunbeam**

The twenty-first century was round the corner, and along with it new ambitions and desires arose. Following Aro's whim, we began to prepare a party to welcome the new millennium. It was his fourth or fifth, and he felt really excited; he wanted to throw a grand, luxurious celebration for the whole world to see the Volturi were in their best moment. Given the successes I had managed when in charge of parties, the New Year's Eve, New Millennium Ball went to me. The planning meant that I had to work closely with someone I'd carefully avoided all this time: Chelsea.

Over the years our relationship had evolved into a cold, never-talking, never-fighting system, with barely any interaction. We could go weeks on end without even seeing each other, and now any interaction felt awkward. I knew too well that she would never forgive me, and I found it difficult to act around her, for I didn't actually feel guilty, and I thought the whole situation was stupid, yet I knew there was nothing I could to change it. Therefore, the farthest we were, the better. Somehow, we managed to speak directly only twice during the whole process and turned everyone we could into messengers. Demetri and Felix hated us by the end of the month, but it was the best we could do. It was about survival.

We invited the six Cullens to our party, but they were unable to come, arguing too much work. Marcus said that it the actual reason was probably that they were drawing a line, staying away from the public eye to avoid further conflicts with us. It seemed wise to me, but the Trio would have liked another chance to check on them personally.

When the written apology signed by Carlisle and his wife (what a strange concept it was to all of us, that they were joined by the human laws of marriage) arrived to the castle, I thought it necessary to bring it personally to Aro. I found him sitting at the table with the morning paper and a glass of warm blood. Sometimes, when there were leftovers from what Heidi brought home, we extracted the blood and put it away for later use (there is hardly a better invention in history than the fridge). That way, when someone felt thirsty, he could just help himself to a glass of carefully heated blood without having to wait for Heidi to go out again or risking a hunt by himself. Aro had become rather partial to drinking while he read the newspaper, and often invited me to join him. He still insisted on educating me, now more than ever because women had changed so much and drifted away from good old manners.

"Ah, what a shame," he said when he read the card. "Such old friends, and they won't attend our little gathering. Well, well, come here, my darling, sit with me and read this review about last night's performance of the Mariinsky."

I sat at his feet, as always, with a velvet cushion under my knees, and he handed me the paper. After a few minutes of reading his hand came to rest on my hair, petting me as he would do with a pup. It was a pleasant routine for both of us, and most of our morning passed that way.

As the day of the celebration came closer the atmosphere in the household grew irritatingly festive. People seemed really happy to have made it to another century or even millennium. Some began sneaking out of the castle to hunt (it's amazing how often such golden rules are broken), others, specially the talented ones, started playing around with each other and with humans they kidnapped for the sole purpose of fun. I have to admit; sometimes I did take part on such games, mainly because Felix always managed to find just the type I hated most: young girls. Since I was trying to manage the organization of the party with my ghost relationship with Chelsea, taking it all out on those pretty, petty kids made me feel better. But sometimes the halls got too noisy, and people difficult to deal with, so Alec and I took to going out on our own. He was the only one I could openly talk to about Chelsea, about Aro, about everything that hurt. And, although he never told me, I knew was troubled him. He felt alone; he had never had any true friend, anyone to make a connection with, and even the problems I'd had with people appealed to him, for they carried emotion and learning. Yes, I was his sister, and I would be there for him no matter what, we were each other's confident and best friend, but I understood that he needed a new face. I was constantly hoping someone would appear, someone to draw a genuine smile on his lips.

He found a pleasant occupation in working, though, and by the end of December everything was perfect. The party was, as every single party in our home, a success. This one was even more splendid than others, because of the celebration of yet another thousand years gone by. It seemed everyone had new plans, new expectations, everyone was convinced that this was the time to achieve everything they wanted. The party served as a reunion for centuries-lost friends, and some plans were made that very night.

There were plenty of humans to drink from, there were elegant dresses, flowers, ornaments, and music, real music like the one many of us had been raised with, or at least had seen emerge and shine. Aro asked me to dance with him, the good old kind of dancing that used to exist, not the hysterical shaking and jumping around that people do nowadays. We twirled and waltzed across the hall, and for those minutes nothing else mattered. In our desire for overwhelming glamour we had even gotten fireworks, dazzling sparks of light that rose high in the sky, leaving pink, blue, golden and red trails. All our guests gathered in the balconies to admire them, and Aro offered his arm to me as he guided me towards one open window.

"This is it, my darling," he said as we watched the fireworks. "Everything we have ever wanted, we will get this time." He sounded hopeful, just as everybody else I had seen during the night. As for me, there wasn't much left to hope for; everything I'd ever dreamed of had been shattered.

We both looked into space, into the sparkling sky. He thought of his child, yearned but remote; my mind travelled to something much closer, but perhaps just as distant. I tried to read some kind of guidance in the star-covered blackness, but found none. I felt the heavy, soft velvet cloak over my shoulders and remembered that as long as I had this I should fear nothing. This was my home, my safety, and I should be grateful enough that I had them. There was no time for other nonsense. I heard screams in the gardens, and then laughter. Someone must have been killed, much to Felix's amusement. I heard the chatting, the dancing, the whispering. Then I looked at Aro again.

"Yes, Master. I know we will."

He kissed my hands and my forehead. "Jane. You will always be my little golden sunbeam."

But if I was a sunbeam, someone else soon became the Universe.


	33. She

**She**

Aro and Marcus drive into town today. From time to time they seek amusement in the silly and ordinary lives of humans; it provides quite a distraction between millennia. Today the Tuscan sun is high and burning in the sky, and so Aro and Marcus roll up the tinted windows of the black van as they look at the tiny humans going about their business. It is a little after midday, and the streets are overflowing with children leaving their schools. There is chattering, there are jokes, there is laughter and there are plans for the upcoming weekend

The brothers are immersed in a heated debate about human beauty. Feminine beauty. Marcus believes true beauty can exist in a mortal woman. Aro, however, argues that, since human women, no matter how beautiful they are, eventually grow old and die, it cannot be said that they hold true beauty, for it fades and disappears, and therefore doesn't really exist.

"They do not have the beauty," argues Aro. "It is not theirs. It is not even real. It is nothing but an illusion, a pretty one, yes, yet nothing but chimeras."

"You are wrong to think so. Many women retain their beauty even in old age, even after death. If they are able to carry that beauty even in the afterlife, then it is absolute and determined."

Their discussion continues heatedly while Marcus drives through the Volterran streets.

"Show me one human woman," says Aro finally, "one, that can make you stop and look at her by just walking by, and I will believe you. One that is unforgettable, one that makes you wish you could sleep so you were to dream of her. So, tell me, which one? Who can take my breath away? Which human can dazzle a vampire?"

"That one," says Marcus, almost instantly. Aro follows the direction his brother's finger points out, and he sees her.

Aro believes his brother now. She is perfect. She is his every dream, his every desire, his every fantasy. He cannot form a single thought, no, he can only watch her, enthralled. He has had thousands of women before, but they are all forgotten when he sees her. Nothing he has ever felt in five thousand years comes close to what she stirs in him.

She is a girl Aro wants. A girl he _needs_. A girl he wants in his arms, in his bed, in his life. A girl who cannot be older than Romeo's Juliet, a woman-child, a budding temptation. A girl whose voice is soft, whose movements are delicate, a girl who is graceful even in stillness. A girl whose young body promises more yet to bloom, but a body that is already spinning the wildest fantasies in his head. He can think of a thousand things he wants to do to her under the sheets, he can think of clothes and jewellery and all sorts of things he could adorn her with, he has planned a life together in just seconds. Yes, she is just a child, but she is so provoking he doesn't stop to think about that. Aro craves this girl, needs her as he has never needed anyone before. This is no passing whim; this is something he must have by his side as long as he lives. He shall have her, or else he shall die.

Aro listens, eavesdrops in her conversation hoping to catch her name, but in the end he has everyone's but hers. She speaks. He listens to her soft, high voice, the velvety accent coming from her perfect lips. She smiles. She says her goodbyes and turns around, probably heading home. She walks. Her long, straight hair flows in a black waterfall down her back, moving with her every step and reflecting the sun like perfectly polished obsidian.

Her fate is settled. Aro will never let her go. From this moment on she belongs entirely to him, though she's unaware of his existence. Her life is no longer under her control. She is his.


	34. Alice

**Alice**

Her name was Alice Brandon. Thirteen years old, birthday on December 15. Only child of a businessman and a painter, and aspiring to be journalist or photographer herself. She had been born in England, then lived for a short time in France and finally moved here to Volterra following her father's job. She spent her free time in ballet classes or watching movies. Currently single but wishing to date a young sophomore called James. Favourite book _Rebecca_, favourite ice cream flavour chocolate, favourite food pasta, favourite pet cats, favourite colour pink.

She was also charming, and very intelligent. Her collection of books was quite impressive, she spoke English, French, Italian, Spanish, and some Russian; she had travelled and seemed to be the one most knowledgeable person in the world when it came to high fashion. She had tried to teach herself to play the piano, but soon gave up due to the lack of someone to correct her, and lack of time to take classes. She loved The Beatles, Queen, and Muse. She could drink up to six cups of coffee a day and never went to sleep before midnight.

All this and more my brother found out over the course of one month, in which he became the girl's shadow under Aro's orders. He followed her everywhere, from her house to school, and back, and to the grocery store, and to the Piazza, and sometimes he even guarded her house over the night. He took a few of pictures of her to have a better report, and also followed her parents and some of her closest friends to have a clearer idea of who she was; everybody seemed to think her a smart, sweet child.

A couple of times he took me along, and I had the opportunity to verify with my own eyes the greatest horror: she was every bit as beautiful as my worst nightmare. One could see the seed of what would become absolute beauty, a curtain of sleek raven hair falling down her back, striking blue eyes, a face anyone would place as that of an angel and a body that in due time would make the delights of any man. Full red lips (not pink, red) in a small pout and skin so white and even that form afar you could have even mistaken her for one of own. I have to admit, she was very tempting. Curvy, slender, petite, strong, she gave you the impression of being a tiny doll beneath whose pretty face you would find some sort of fierce passion.

Aro was besotted with her. For days on end he talked of nothing but this girl, her beauty, her charm, her perfection. He adored Marcus now, for having pointed her out to him, and admitted laughing that his brother had indeed won the argument, for looks as good as Alice's would definitely never fade. Whenever Alec brought a new piece of information about her Aro spent hours discussing it and finding a thousand ways to use it in his favour. He learned everything there could be known about someone, her tastes, her dislikes, what she had done, what she was doing, and what she was about to do. He came to know her better than she knew herself, for every tiny gesture, word, and movement was dissected by him to its smallest detail. There was no room in Aro's life for anything that wasn't Alice.

He was crazy with carnal desire for her, of course, but there was something else there. I had seen a parade of girls become Aro's lovers, but it was clear to me that they only meant fertile wombs to him, their value was directly proportional to how able they were to conceive, and he never seemed to regret it if they died or he had to leave them. Some of them had been quite unremarkable; he only noticed their frame, their strength and their age, and if they happened to be pretty, well, that was an extra. Yet with Alice it was different: he liked her for herself. He wanted _her_, the girl, especially and concretely her, and he had to get her to be fully satisfied. He hadn't even mentioned the possibility of her bearing a child. Even if she didn't give him what he wanted it didn't matter, because the girl herself was the necessity. He wouldn't mind if she was dry and sterile as a desert, as long as he could admire and possess her beauty, as long as he could enjoy her company, as long as he could be with her.

Not satisfied with Alec's information, Aro set out to observe her by himself. He had a very luxurious van now, top technology with everything you could dream of. It was huge, black, elegant, with tinted windows and an almost noiseless engine. Though Aro owned many, many cars, this was his favourite, and so he drove it all around Volterra to see Alice, hoping it would bring him luck. Every time he returned home from such missions he was all the more infatuated with her.

After a couple more weeks of observing, Aro decided it was time to approach Alice directly. Going back to all the times he had seduced girls and the tricks he had used with them, he bought a single red rose and waited for her outside school. When she appeared he waited for her to be alone (which was difficult given her popularity), and then he approached her and handed her the flower.

"A rose for another rose," he said.

Aro made us (his brothers, mine, and myself) listen a thousand times for the detailed replay of the event. She had been surprised, of course, and a little startled, but other than that she didn't look freaked out or anything of the sort. She had looked down, smiled, looked up again, thanked him, and continued her way. According to Aro, her heartbeat had been stable. She didn't mention the incident to anyone, though, and Aro was pleased about it, for it meant the contact had been special to her. He told us the whole scene time and time again, and we analysed it to the core: gestures, words, reactions, future steps in seducing her. According to everything we knew about her she appreciated chivalry, so if he kept going in that direction it was probable that he succeeded. He planned his next movement and the rest of us hoped for the best.

_Their second contact comes three days later, when he sees her on her way home, struggling with some grocery bags that are too full and tall for her tiny structure. This time he makes sure she doesn't know he has been watching or waiting, and he appears just walking round the corner._

_She regards him with careful eyes, as if trying to decide whether seeing him again is good or bad._

"_Hello." He smiles. "Do you need help with that?"_

_She refuses, she's fine. Actually, she isn't that far away from where she's going._

_He knows. You're heading home, which is two blocks away. "Are you sure? Those bags look heavy."_

_It's ok, really. But it is very kind of him._

_He smiles and bows lightly. He walks away, pretending not to pay any attention to her anymore. Yet, for a second, it seems to him that her steps are faster than before._

"You will scare her, Aro, be careful," warned Marcus. "If you appear out of nowhere she'll know you're following her. No girl likes that."

"Oh, but I was only trying to help her. I'm sure she realized that, and she appreciated it."

"Take your time," Caius agreed with Marcus. "There is no hurry, she's young. She won't be ripe enough for a while, and you can use that to your advantage. Everything in due time."

"The time is now. She's as perfect as she'll ever be, and I see no reason to waste precious months. It won't take long for her to want me just as much as I want her."

There was something in Aro's eyes, a sort of whimsical gleam that none of us missed and none of us liked. Marcus seemed to weigh his next words before speaking.

"Aro, what exactly do you want from her?" he asked. "I mean, what do you expect to find in her? You are completely obsessed with this child, you're trying to win her trust and affections, but I don't think you have a clue of what you're really doing, let alone what you want."

"He wants to bed her, of course," said Caius, deeply amused. "This idea he's making himself believe, that he likes her, is a mere delusion. You are a man of low passions, brother, just as I always knew and am finally proving. Don't worry Marcus, it's nothing a couple of nights with her won't be able to heal."

"Shut up," said Aro brusquely. "You know quite well it doesn't work that way. She's different from all the others. She's more than that. She's beauty, she's warmth, she's wits. I shall have everything in her, everything. She's already mine."

Having said that he stormed out of the room.

_It is an unusually cold September morning, and kids are on their way to school. Aro knows that he'll see Alice within the next five minutes, for she always leaves home on time and has her favourite route. Sure enough, here she comes._

_Alice is allowed to go on her own now, she's grown and she knows how to take care of herself. Though she wears a coat, boots, scarf, and even an adorable pair of gloves, she seems cold. She heads towards a small coffee shop across the street; Aro knows that's her favourite. However, before going in she stops, takes out her pink purse, and counts the coins. She makes a face, and Aro can guess that she's just a few cents short of what she needs. She sighs, and her warm breath forms a cloud around her lips, trying not to look too disappointed she simply walks past the coffee shop._

_This is Aro's perfect chance to talk to her again; since that day last week when he offered his help with the bags there hasn't been much opportunity for them to be close, and that's something he resents deeply. He goes into the coffee shop and orders what he knows to be her favourite, the one she would have just ordered if it hadn't been for those little coins. Thankfully the coffee is ready fast, and he catches up with her in a matter of seconds._

"_Alice."_

_She stops, and though he doesn't see her face he can tell she was startled. Slowly, she turns around._

"_Sorry, he apologizes. "I didn't mean to frighten you. Good morning."_

"_G-good morning."_

_She smiles tentatively and he hands her the cup. "I took the liberty. I do beg your pardon if I've made an indiscretion."_

_She looks at the cup, then at him, and says, a bit embarrassed, "Sir, I… you shouldn't have, I can't, I…"_

"_Oh, don't worry. It was a pleasure. And please, don't call me sir. I'm Aro." He pauses and then he places the cup in her hand. "I hope I got it right."_

_She takes a tentative sip. "How did you…?"_

"_Do you like it? Oh, that is great."_

_Her heartbeat accelerates, and he hears her take a breath. Then her heart steadies._

"_But you really shouldn't have," she insists. "I will pay you back, of course, it's just that today-"_

"_Don't mention it."_

"_But sir-"_

"_Aro."_

"_A-Aro, I-"_

"_Please, Alice. I seek only your comfort. I'm not asking anything from you." He smiles. "Now go, or you will be late for class."_

_She looks doubtful, but in the end she thanks him again and heads for the school. Aro pretends to leave, but he just gets inside his black van and watches her as she walks. Again, the fast steps. The coffee burns too hot in her hand. He can't have just guessed, for it's not even on the menu; she had designed it after a series of trial and error. He must have known beforehand. And if he knew that then he must have… She supresses a small jump of her stomach. Only then does she realize she has never told him her name._


	35. Fever

**Fever**

He fell in love with her.

Up until now it had only been desire, raw desire for her body and her beauty. Up until now I had thought that if he could bed her his anxiety would pass, but now he also craved her company, her presence, her self. He wouldn't be satisfied with a couple of nights anymore.

He'd fallen in love with her, and quite madly. He fell in love with her character, her attitude, her sense of humour. He fell in love with her charisma, with the way any sound was more than enough to make her dance, with the way she strutted down the streets like the best of supermodels. He would mention her at random, and talk about things in our life and home that she was bound to love once she came here. He never had any doubts about the fact that she'd come, he made plans around that certainty. His conquest of her was advancing, though she didn't seem any warmer to him, and he was confident that with everything he knew about her he'd know perfectly well what to do to convince her.

However, there was one thing Aro was missing in his watching of Alice: he didn't know her thoughts. The net of observation had covered her past, present, and future, likes and dislikes, family, friends, activities and personality, but still he didn't know what went through her head. Therefore, he set out to find a chance to touch her next time he met her.

_He finds her on her way back from the library. She carries a cute pink leather bag, no doubt full of books. Oh, how happy she'll be when she sees the thousands of volumes he keeps in three separate libraries around the castle._

"_Alice." This time he doesn't call from behind, but meets her right face to face; that way it won't be obvious that he has been following her._

"_Aro." She sounds more confident now, though he can still hear her heart pounding._

"_How are you?"_

"_Fine." Her blue eyes look at him inquisitively; she doesn't trust him and his trying to figure out what he means and wants._

"_That's great," he needs to touch her, he can't figure her out. "I got you this," he says, taking out a wrapped package. "I saw it and thought of you. I hope you like it."_

_It's a notebook, pink and glittery. It has more sheets than most notebooks, and they're soft and creamy, excellent quality of paper. Alice looks at it, but makes not movement to take it._

"_I… I can't accept this. I'm sorry."_

"_Why not?"_

"_It's not appropriate." She takes a breath, wants to say more but does not know how to put it. "It's too much."_

"_I didn't mean to offend you, Alice. I wish only to make you happy." He tries to think of something to say that will win her trust, some honey he can pour in her ears. "Do forgive me." And he has to say it, he cannot keep the compliment inside. "Aren't you pretty…" he says softly, so softy he isn't sure she actually heard, and then does what he so longed for: he strokes her cheek with the back of his hands._

_Three realizations hit him at once: the first is the silkiness of her skin, smooth, soft, and warm; the second is that the urge to keep touching her is almost irresistible, the energy of that brief contact becomes too powerful and he yearns to feel more of that skin. The third one is that he sees nothing. Absolutely nothing. In five thousand years he had not known what it was like to touch someone without seeing into the very core of the heart, yet now this human child stands before him, not even tall enough to reach his shoulder, and he can't get through her. His shock is so big that even she notices it, and looks at him doubtfully. He recovers, puts his worry in a corner inside his mind, and brings out the feeling of that contact with Alice, that craving to touch her, to get under her jacket and have that human softness combine with his vampire texture, he wants to feel the heat underneath his fingertips._

_And now this makes him think of something else. Besides her beauty, there's another thing messing with him: her smell. Hers is probably the sweetest blood he's ever smelled, fresh, sweet, and strong. And now that he sees she has this fascinating barrier he begins to fantasize with her as a vampire. She's beautiful. She's smart. She has this amazing potential for a great talent. And there is blood pulsing under her paleness, he can see the veins throbbing and warming her body, and he pictures himself piercing the delicate tissue of her neck and drinking and drinking…-_

_But there is now the reaction to his compliment. She looks uncomfortable. When her eyes meet his, the look is careful and guarded. She does not trust him, and he has to fix this._

"_I… I'm sorry. I have to go."_

_She tries to leave, but he stops her; she has left him the notebook. "Please," he insists, "take this. A token of friendship. I mean you no harm, Alice. Really."_

_She's still wary, but finally takes the notebook and puts it inside her bag. Then she's on her way; this time she does not stop him. She walks normally until she's around the corner, then her steps grow faster and faster, almost until she's running._

I remember the shock when Aro told us he couldn't read Alice's mind. Looks were exchanged, gasps were muffled.

"So what, now? You can't control her or manipulate her," said Caius.

"Oh, indeed I can, just in a different way." Aro was calm, peaceful, and even happy.

"How so?" inquired Marcus. "She seems to be somehow protected from you, at least her mind is. You will have a hard time, besotted as you are by someone you do not understand."

"I cannot see her mind, but I can get to understand her heart. After all, it's a good thing that her thoughts are closed to me, for now I have the challenge and the opportunity to conquer other aspects of her. Nothing will stand between me and this girl."

Marcus spoke again. "There is a boy. A boy who likes her and who apparently likes her back."

I remembered the kid, I had seen them one of the times Alec invited me. He wasn't mentioned too often in our household because no one actually thought too much of him. His name was James, two or three years older than Alice herself. He was good-looking, and his love of motorcycles and rock was evident in his rebellious clothing. No wonder Alice found him interesting. Aro, however, took no time to look down on him.

"A boy! What has a boy to do with all this? She would be wasted on a boy. She's too valuable for that, Marcus; she needs a man, a real man who knows what she's worth, who knows what she needs and knows how to treat her. She is too much for any child who dreams about her. She needs a man."

"And you will be that man."

"Evidently. Alice will be mine, mine and no one else's."

A couple of days later he went to see her, and the boy was with her. They were talking, there was no specific relationship between them but it was clear that there was good disposition on both sides. Aro watched enraged as she laughed at his jokes and he looked at her adoringly. A handsome boy, fair-haired, and then Alice with her dark braid and her porcelain face. They looked good together, and they knew it.

Two days later there was a traffic accident. A motorcycle and a truck collided in the highway, killing the rider of the former. It came as little surprise that this rider was James. He had died instantly, and just as instantly he vanished from Aro's way. I saw Alice visit James's grave a week later. She'd brought him flowers, and she stayed there for a while, without talking or crying or showing anything at all. She just sat there for a while, toying with a petal, and in her eyes there was a new expression, a fierceness she didn't have before and which I instantly knew would bring more trouble to Aro.

There were pressing matters that had lost priority because of this tiny kid. There was talk of rebellion in the East; no doubt the Romanians trying to play smart again. There was also a new coven in New Zealand that required attention, for the leader was creating newborns and needed to be supervised. His brothers were dealing with it all beautifully, but they needed him as well for the weight of his authority, and he was leaving all responsibilities unattended. It was too much, and she didn't deserve it. Still, though many shared this opinion, none of us ever dared to tell him anything.

"I have never seen her," said Felix one day when she became the topic among the guard, "but I bet you she's not worth it."

Demetri agreed with him. "Besides, what will he do with her? He tires easily and in no time he'll be killing her, and all this will have been a waste of time and effort."

"Alec, you're the one who knows her better than herself. Is she worth the trouble?"

"You know what, Corin? I don't think we know her at all. Yes, we have observed her and traced every aspect of her life, yet we have not figured out how she thinks or feels. This boy, this child Aro has had taken out of the way, he was very important to her, yet she didn't weep for him. There's something in her, something stronger that will surprise us, and not in a good way."

Aro finally decided to go back to regular duties and give Alice (and everyone) a rest. He sorted most of it out, but preferred to let the Romanians be and just keep them in observation. For that, he sent my brother to test the waters, because he had the diplomacy and delicacy that most of us lacked when facing enemies. Demetri took the task of spying on Alice, since I had been called by Aro to work with him. For a while I could pretend she did not exist at all and therefore I got back some peace of mind. Of course, it did not last long and soon Aro was absorbed by his girl again.

I did not know exactly how to feel about her. A big part of me hated her for existing, for being so young and so beautiful and so human, for being so loved by the man I wanted. Yet I knew she didn't want him, she wasn't at all interested and had even begun to feel rather intimidated and repelled by him. The attention he was giving her made her uncomfortable, and that made a lot of the difference. All I had seen until now were girls who adored him, girls who worshipped him; they were honoured to be chosen and served him with all they had. He was the best that ever happened to them. But Alice… Alice didn't seem very thrilled to have his interest. She had a very different life, very different interests, and, being a girl of new times, had no intention of settling down and forming a couple or a home while still being a teenager. Besides, she had already loved once, however briefly, and I had the impression that she somehow knew, _felt_, that Aro had had some responsibility over James's death. She never said anything to anyone, and she didn't keep a diary, so it was impossible to be certain, but she knew anyway. The point was that I couldn't hate her as much as I wanted to, for if it were up to her she wouldn't have anything to do with Aro or any of us (she still didn't know about the whole Volturi and vampire thing, but she wasn't the kind to be impressed by it). Still, I needed to hate her. It was all very confusing.

Aro gave Alice two weeks to mourn James and to see how she acted like after him. Then, he resumed his pursuit. A whole month had passed since he'd spoken to her, almost three since he'd first seen her, and though other girls had taken longer than her to fall, he grew more impatient every day. I worried about him, and so did everyone in the castle. Yet the worst was about to begin.


	36. Beastly

**Beastly**

Aro's intention to claim Alice as his became more and more evident. He was now talking to her at least twice a week and watching her everyday. Worse, he had begun to leave little presents in her bag –chocolates, makeup, fashion magazines, little trinkets he knew she liked. If he ever knew how much these gifts disturbed her he never showed it, but Alec told me about how pale her face would be when she found the objects, how she would look around, somehow knowing herself observed.

_He watches her from the outside of the house. He's left something on her night table, chocolates and a small stuffed bunny. He saw her leave school almost twenty minutes ago, so it won't be long until she's home. Sure enough, he can hear her now. She goes into the house and heads towards her bedroom. She sees what he left for her, and it seems that she gathers courage to pick up the objects. Aro can see her mind working, trying to figure it out. Finally, she makes the connection. She looks around, intuitively knowing she's being watched, and tries to know where he is. There is a strange look on her pretty face, paler than usual, and in her alert sapphire eyes. It takes a moment for Aro to place that look: she's frightened, very frightened. He longs to run to her side and soothe her, tell her he means no harm, but he knows it's better to let her emotions rest and settle. Oh, but she's so beautiful! The fear in her face gives it a whole new expression, and he loves it. So vulnerable, so tender, and so ready to be shaped and taken under his protection. In a way, knowing that he's capable of provoking such strong emotions in her excites him. He controls what she feels now; he can make her feel whatever he wants._

_She takes the stuff and puts it inside a bag; there she keeps everything he has ever given her. She lacks the courage to throw it away, and also to just take it. Alice hasn't told anyone about this, no one knows about Aro but her. She did consider talking to someone about it, but now she thinks it's too late; anyone who heard her would think that if she hasn't stopped him by now it's because she actually likes it. She takes the bag and throws it in the back of her closet, then plops herself on her bed. He stays a few minutes longer, then leaves, with the scarf he managed to steal from her closet well saved in his pocket._

Aro stormed into the hall, walking fast and furiously. Behind him the door closed with a huge blow that echoed around the walls. His eyes were lost, with some inferno burning in them; his hands trembled and there was the faintest of growls building in his throat. His face was never more like a vampire's, and his body looked ready for battle. No one had ever seen him like that, and we didn't dare say nor do anything. He walked around the hall until finally we understood what had happened.

"She said no!" he roared.

"Brother, what's the matter?" asked Caius as he and Marcus rushed to his side. Even them, so used to Aro's millennia of fits, looked worried.

Aro paced around the hall, furious and restless as a caged lion. His eyes burned like red coals, and if anyone approached him or talk to him he looked likely to rip the intruder's head off. It seemed as if at any moment he would start to breathe out fire.

"Master, what happened?" I took the risk and spoke. Alec grabbed me by the hand and pulled me behind him.

"I talked to her today, after her classes," he growled to no one in particular. "I'd even brought her a rose, like the day we first spoke," here he smashed a table with his fist. "And then she became all serious, asked me what my intentions with her were. I thought I should be honest so that we could make quicker progress, so I told her that I was looking for something more formal with her, that I wished to begin a proper courtship and that she was beginning to represent something very special to me."

"And then?" asked Marcus.

"And then she pursed her lips, looked at me, and began saying, 'Oh sir, I appreciate that' ", here he mock-mimicked her voice, " 'but I' m afraid I can't accept your offer.' And then she went on and on saying that she's too young, that she hasn't begun to think about those things, 'of course I feel very flattered by your words, but it's much too soon for me to give you an answer'. She said she needs time, and she wants me to think it over, too. And then she left! Just like that! She turned around and left! I stood there, me, humiliating myself before a human child, and she had the nerve of refusing me!"

"Brother, calm yourself," began Marcus. "What would be the problem with letting her ripen more? You don't want any whining brat by your side, do you? She should mature."

"For fuck's sake, I have seen girls younger than her with children at their breasts! And she says she's too young!"

"Aro, she _is_ young, and those were old times." For the first time, Caius intervened in Alice's behalf. "You can't expect her to have her whole life figured out right now. She needs time to grow up and to think."

"What's there to think about? Her life is with me. And don't you go bullshit me with that age thing. Mona Mayfair was just Alice's age when she produced the next witch of her dynasty.

"God forbid your Alice is anything like Mona. Just listen to what she says, Aro, give her time. What's four, five years to you, to us? Let her grow up and then she'll be perfect and ready for you."

"She's perfect and ready for me just as she is right now. But she's playing with me, playing and trying to slowly drive me crazy. She's just teasing me! Happily and intentionally teasing me, the little whore!"

He smashed a bookshelf, and both Caius and Marcus tried to make him calm down, reason with him, try to make him control his temper. But Aro was blind with fury, and he would not listen to anyone. For a whole week he didn't go out and spent his time cursing her with such wrath we began to fear for his sanity. In all the years I had known him he had never been the kind to lose control over anything, least of all a girl. He was the one who would calculate the next step, watch, be patient, he would always take his time to scheme his way to anything he wanted without ever doubting or getting angry. This Aro was a whole new person and he was horrifying. Caius and I talked once, and I realized just how very disturbed Aro's brothers were about this whole situation.

"Jane," he said, "please look after him. You are the only person he might listen to, you're the only one who could stop him from doing something stupid."

"I don't think he will listen to anyone right now, Caius. The one person who could have some influence on him is _her_."

"That goddamn little brat," he said through gritted teeth. "I don't know what powers she has, but she will be his ruin. Whatever happens, whether she accepts him or not, she will be his ruin. But do look after Aro, Jane, you really have that power to make him feel better, and you give him good advice. You have always been a good support for him, and even if he doesn't realize, he will need you a lot. Be there for him."

We tried to continue with normal life despite Aro's distress. The fine operations of vampire society couldn't afford to be interrupted by a thirteen-year-old girl's refusal. Law was as strictly applied as ever, covens were supervised, administration flowed. Heidi continued providing us with fresh nourishment through a thousand twisted strategies, and we carried on with the exquisite secret of our world. But one day I arrived to the Main Hall for mealtime and saw everyone standing in shock. Some of the vampires were feeding, but the majority simply stood there, with only the eyes betraying what was clear in the humans' weeping and screaming. Through closed doors came the cries of a girl, human by the sound of her heart, inarticulate, painful voice breaking down. Aro was nowhere to be seen and I knew he was in there with the girl. No one dared move while that encounter lasted. Eventually the screams ceased, and Aro appeared. He looked at all of us, vampires and humans alike, and then proceeded to feed as if nothing had happened. The guard soon followed the example and no one made the slightest reference to the corpse that could be seen through the open door.

Felix was later sent in to deal with the girl's body, and he described a young teenage creature who had been martyrized in essentially every way possible. Heidi said she had arrived with the big group of humans, and that the moment Aro had spotted her he had taken her to that room to the side of the Hall. He had never done something like that; those humans were only nourishment and had never been used as any sort of diversion, so Aro's actions had us all baffled. Then, the following week, it happened again: the young girl, the screams, the killing. That time I managed to have a quick look at her: she couldn't have been older than fifteen, pretty, soft, quite charming. She had been severely hurt by Aro, and I simply couldn't understand why; it didn't even look as if he had fed from her. Then it happened again, and yet once more.

As I thought about the four girls it all suddenly clicked. It took me a while, but I noticed the pattern. I remembered the corpses Aro left and saw the blue eyes, the dark hair, the fair skin, the youth. He was killing _her_ lookalikes. Alice's lookalikes. He was looking for girls around Alice's age and physical appearance (though none as beautiful as her), and cruelly murdering them for how she was making him suffer. He had sworn he would kill her, he had sworn he would make her pay, but he loved her too much to actually hurt her, so he sought representations of her to put out his anger with. It was then when I began to be scared, truly scared for him, for what he was becoming, for what she was doing to him. This wasn't my Aro, the Aro I knew and loved. This was a madman. This was a monster.


	37. Lost

**Lost**

Alice's birthday came a week later. She turned fourteen, and was lovelier than ever. Those looks, those damn good looks. Her body was changing, leaving some of the childish shapes behind to make way for her final womanly figure. She turned even more heads as she walked by, caught more attention. There would soon begin real competition between the local boys for her, yet she didn't seem interested in any of them.

Against everyone's advice, Aro decided to get her a present. His brothers fought hard to dissuade him from paying her whole school year, or buying her a Ferrari, or the little cottage that was being built outside town. After a lot of struggle, he settled for a dress and a box full of books. My brother was sent to check on her after Aro left the presents in her room (he knew by now that if he tried to deliver them in person he would end up returning home with them), and reported to Aro that she had kept them. However, later he told me that she had spent a good part of the night pacing around her room, every now and then looking at the spot where she'd hidden the bag with the gifts.

A lot of meetings were now held without Aro, because sooner or later the conversation would go to how to get Alice and how to seduce her; no one could afford wasting time on that. It was the only way we could get our system to go on working, and to stay focused in things that really mattered. Though no matter how diverse or pressing other matters were, everyone would eventually end up talking about _her, _Aro's absence gave us the chance to discuss situations that would have angered him.

"She has changed a lot. She now dresses, I don't know, more conservatively, more covered up. I think… I think she's somehow feeling pressured. I wouldn't like to use the word 'threatened', but I do believe this whole ordeal with Aro is having an effect on her."

"Well, it's December… people are supposed to be covered up…"

"You know I don't mean just the weather. It's the attitude, the way she walks faster and looks all around with each step she takes. She's a very strong girl, but this is really getting to her. She's frightened."

"But isn't she exaggerating? I mean, if she didn't like Aro's attention she would have already spoken up, wouldn't she? Her parents, a teacher, why, maybe even the police. Perhaps she's just playing hard-to-get."

"Oh, for God's sake, how can you say that? She's being harassed, she's being stalked, there is no way she could possibly enjoy such a thing. Believe me, this is no game for her. Besides, there's something else. She's been having nightmares."

"Nightmares? Are you sure?"

"Well, her sleep is restless, she twists, she moves a lot; one night I even heard her whimper. And then, when she wakes up in the middle of the night, she looks rather startled and nervous. It takes quite some time for her to fall asleep again."

Debates could last hours. Aro was growing more anxious with each passing day; he became irritable, moody, and singularly bad-tempered. He and Alice didn't talk for a week after her birthday; there were a couple of days without any events, until he decided to meet her on her way from a friend's house. When he returned from that encounter, his eyes were gleaming. He came into the main hall, sat down with a happy sigh, and shared the news.

"I proposed to her."

The world stopped. Caius and Marcus looked up from their newspapers.

"You what?"

"I proposed to her. You know, got down on one knee, gave her a ring. Asked her to marry me. Proposed."

"But… why?"

"It seemed the only way. I need her, I need her more than anything in my life, and I thought that if I offered something formal, something stable, she would accept more easily. Women like that sort of formality."

"But… she's human… what about our secret-"

"She knows."

"What!?"

The silence could be heard everywhere. It was obvious that the whole wing of the castle had heard and now held their breath, waiting for the next catastrophe. _Oh no. Oh no. He can't have told her. That's… that's betrayal, that is punished by our laws, that's… How could he?_

"She knows. Don't ask me why, I didn't tell her anything. The third time I talked to her, she knew. Apparently she has read every single book there is on Earth: there are many volumes with legends about vampires, witches, and other magic in her room; I can only guess she connected the dots."

Caius was furious. "You must have shown her something! You must have done something to awaken her suspicions. And why haven't you denied it? Did you accept the fact that she knows, just like that? My God, are you aware of what that could mean for us? _All_ of us? This could be the end! This could be it!"

"It won't. She says she doesn't care, and I know she wouldn't do anything to hurt us. Besides, what could she actually do, anyway? She surely knows she's overpowered here, so she'll be careful with what she does or says. Our secret is safe with Alice. But the point is that she knows, and therefore she can come with me. In due time, she will be one of us. Oh, she'll make a fantastic vampire, don't you think? With her beauty, her wits, that _potential_ she has, oh, she'll be wonderful."

_So I'll have to put up with her forever? Please, no._ By the exchange of looks around the place I could tell that many shared my thoughts; the news of her knowing our secret had been taken by everyone as a personal blow. It would take a while for us to actually forgive Aro for that, and many were now feeling uncomfortable or even threatened by the idea of her coming with us.

Marcus looked as if he had a thousand things to say, but no idea as to how. He sighed, and for a moment he actually appeared to be thousands of years old. He folded his newspaper carefully before speaking. "Well, well, well, and what did she have to say about this proposal of yours?"

"The usual: she's too young, she needs time. She'll have to think of a better excuse if she means to keep me away. She's now saying that, given the fact that I have unlimited time available, there is no hurry for her to decide. 'What's five years to you?' she says. 'If you do love me as much as you say you can afford to wait for me'."

"She's got a point."

"No, she doesn't! I need her now, right now. She's perfect for me just as she is. We keep no secrets from each other now. I know everything there is to know about her, and she knows it all about me as well."

"You have no idea who she is, Aro. All that spying and stalking is nothing. You don't know her at all, and when you finally do it will be too late for both of you."

Aro stormed out, angry as a spoiled child who has been denied a toy. We simply waited for his tantrum to pass, giving it little or no importance.

If I had known, oh, if only I had known what was coming, if I'd read between the lines, if I'd understood, if I'd _seen._

"_Alice."_

_She stops, doesn't turn around. She knows it's him. She looks around, makes sure there are more people with them, and finally faces him._

"_Hello, Aro."_

"_I won't take long. I just wanted to know whether you'd reconsidered my proposal."_

"_I told you I needed time."_

"_And I've given it to you."_

"_A week?"_

_She is right, perhaps he's rushing. But he loves her, and needs an answer as soon as possible._

"_What do you want? Name anything, and it is yours. A car? Jewels? Anything, Alice."_

"_Are you trying to buy me?"_

_Damn. "No, no, please don't take it that way. I seek only your happiness, your comfort. If there's anything I can get you to make you feel-"_

"_Aro, no more gifts. Please."_

"_Don't you like them?"_

_She takes a deep breath; he knows her well enough now to know that she does that when she's trying to remain polite while actually being very angry or exasperated. "No, I don't. It's uncomfortable for me, and it's inappropriate. I ask you, please no more gifts."_

_He wants to take her face in his hands and make her see that it's alright, that she mustn't be afraid, that he doesn't mean any harm. He actually reaches out to touch her. "Alice, if only you would let me explain how much I love you."_

_She steps back, escaping his contact, and he hears her heart accelerate when he meets her wary eyes. "Aro, come on, you don't really love me, not-"_

"_Oh, but I do! I love you more than anything else in the world."_

"_No, you don't. You've only made yourself believe it, and if I accepted you now, you would be the first one to regret it, and very soon. You're just infatuated with me, Aro, but you and I know it's not love." If it were he wouldn't be doing this to her, if he truly loved her he wouldn't be hunting her, he wouldn't make her feel like prey. This is an obsession, a sick obsession. She needs to make him understand, before it's too late. "Suppose I accepted you. We'd be together for a while and then what? I guarantee you that after two months you will have grown tired of me. I will become a bore to you, an obstacle, and then you will throw me away. What will I do then? What will become of me? You will go on with your life as if I had never happened, but I could never be the same. I will be stained. I will forever be your mistress, your… your whore." And she's worth more than that. God, there's still so much for her to live!_

"_No, no, no, don't say that! I could never throw you away. You are the most special being I have ever met, I love you, I adore you. I would never make a mistress of you, haven't I proposed? What I want with you is much more formal than that. I beg you, Alice, let me show you. Just give me a chance. I can make you the happiest woman on Earth. You will have everything you have ever wanted, and more. I will turn you into a queen, my queen. Say yes, please say yes, and you will have the most extraordinary life. Marry me, Alice, be my wife."_

"_Aro, no. I will not marry you. If you love me, if you truly love me, then stop all this and forget you ever met me. This cannot happen. It never will."_

_He tries to control his anger. How can she treat him like that? Who does she think she is? He looks at her, that angel face that fights its own emotions, and for a moment wonders what she would do if suddenly he grabbed her and kissed her. Oh, he so wants to kiss her; those lips would be so much better touching his own than spitting out refusals. How dare she? Insolent little girl, he should do something about the arrogance she just displayed. His hand tenses, he wants to punish her for what she has said. He realizes he's reaching out for her face, and stops himself just in time to make his blow become a caress across her cheek. She steps back again, and there's the defiance in her blue eyes. Before he does something he could regret, he climbs into his car and leaves as fast as he can. But as he drives he promises himself she will be the one to regret her actions._


	38. Child

**Child**

After a couple more days of anxiety, Aro got in his beloved black van and left early in the morning. It wasn't until after noon that we heard him in the garage (which now held more than fifteen first-class cars), and then coming upstairs. He came into the hall, cloak floating behind him as he walked fast and proud. There was the biggest smile on his face, one so loaded with pleasure and desire that it left no doubt as to what had caused it.

"My God," whispered Caius softly.

And Aro stood before us, happier than I had ever seen him, ever. All the tension of the past seven months was gone and he almost seemed again the man I knew and loved.

"Aro, what have you done?" asked Marcus, barely concealing his horror.

"Nothing, my brother, I swear."

He sat down in his big leather chair, looking relieved, and more rested than he'd been in months.

"Aro, please, I know you. What did you do to her?"

"Let's say… let's say that I know her now. Biblical sense."

No one knew quite what to say. Aro's expression was strange, pleased and proud, but also worried. He seemed to be rather lost in himself, in thought, in recent memories. He sighed, took out an object from his pocket, and examined it. White fabric, with a pattern of blue and pink little flowers.

"What is it?" I couldn't help asking.

"Her headband."

Caius turned around to look at him. "You took a souvenir from her?"

"Not exactly. I found it in my car. But I'm keeping it."

"You found it in your car?" repeated Caius. Aro was fond of taking little things from her room, but 'finding' something, and inside his van?

"Yes. It… it all happened there, and just I found the headband, when I got here. Must have slipped from her hair. She was wearing it today."

"You took her in your car? Just like that? What did you do with her after afterwards?"

"Well, I drove her home, of course. I couldn't bear the idea of simply letting her go, much less like that."

"What do you mean, like that?" intervened Marcus. "Is she too hurt?"

"No, I don't think so. But still, I didn't think it gentlemanly from me to just leave her on her own. I had to take her home and make sure she was fine." He sighed again. "Anyway. What's done is done. See you around."

Without another word, he left.

After a few hours, everything was still in tense calm. Aro had spent all afternoon alone in his study, reading, while his brothers and the guard carried on with everything despite the huge cloud that hung in the air. No one had dared interrupt him, but I knew him better than anyone else, and felt he needed someone. I sought an excuse to go to him, see that he was ok. Sometimes Heidi brought home more humans that we could deal with in one session, so we kept the blood for another occasion, the way one could keep a bottle of wine. We had refined the preservation system so it could stay fresh for around a week and could be reheated without losing flavour or nutritional properties. Luckily, we had some of this blood at the moment, so I prepared a jar to bring to my Master. 'If you're going to suffer, better suffer on a full stomach,' someone in my village used to say when he gave me bread after my father beat me.

I set a tray with everything necessary and headed for Aro's study. I knocked, and he let me in without asking. He was busy with a few books, and I did not want to interrupt him, so I put the jar of blood on the table, with the cup, as silently as I could.

"Thanks, Jane," he said without looking up. He looked fine, but I sensed his distress.

"Master?" I said, tentatively placing a hand on his shoulder. Soon, his hand was over mine, and he met my eyes. All of a sudden, he hugged me.

"Oh, Jane, Jane, Jane, I have done something terrible. And the worst part is that I can't even regret it. She's driving me crazy. Jane, you know me, you know I'm not like this. I'd never been like this, never done things like these. She does something to me that I cannot explain. She has bewitched me. I swear I didn't want to hurt her. I love her more than my own life. I went to talk to her, I asked her to marry me, I offered her the moon and the stars. And when she refused me, yet again, I couldn't control myself anymore. I suddenly craved her, and I wanted to make her see that she couldn't play like that with me, she can't just provoke me and then treat me like trash. I couldn't let her keep mocking me, could I?"

Aro paused. He gestured with his hands and tried to speak a few times, but found himself at a loss for words. Little by little, he put the story together.

"I couldn't help myself. I took her to the backseat of my car. I know, I know. And she fought me. She fought me like I never thought she would. I did know she didn't think much of me, I imagined that perhaps she disliked me. But that…Such a tiny thing, but so fierce. She hated me, even before this whole thing she hated me, and I never realized. I've hurt her terribly, and the worst is that _I don't regret it._ I can't feel any remorse, and that's much more monstrous than the thing itself."

"You enjoyed it, then?"

For a while he didn't speak. The answer pained him, that much I could see, but it did him good to talk about it. "Yes. Very much. In some perverse way it was really exciting to see her fight and try to defend herself and yet I was more powerful. There was nothing she could do. And she was so beautiful! So perfect! Soft, warm, sweet, she was pure and untouched. Christ, I would do it again! But I can't make her suffer, I can't. It hurts me to see her in pain because of me. Yet…"

Another pause. Finally I spoke. "And what will you do now?" I asked him. Three people mattered in your life: the first person you were intimate with, the person who transformed you, and the person who became your mate. That morning Aro had claimed Alice as a woman, and by becoming one of these three people had forged a link with her forever. Yet something in his eyes told me he wasn't satisfied with that. As always, he wanted more.

"I don't know. I honestly don't know." He got up and began pacing around the study like a caged lion. "I thought that once I'd taken her this urge would disappear, but… it doesn't. And not only that, I need her more now, now that I know what it feels like. She was completely mine for a moment, however brief, and I don't think I can live without that feeling anymore."

"But she… she won't be easy to convince, not after… after this."

"I have to make her see this isn't me! Jane, I'm not like this, I'm not like this, I'm not like this, you know it, Jane, you know me. God, I swear it!" he punched the wall. "What's happening to me? This influence… this power that she has over me, it will be my destruction. I see it coming, and I'm letting this happen."

Alice's headband was on the table. I picked it up; it was soft, cute, girlish. The scent was penetrating: jasmine, white lily, strawberry. It was her scent, something no perfume could match. Though sweet and young, it was very sensual.

"Strong, isn't it?" he said when he saw me with the thing. "My whole car smells of her. She's everywhere, and I'm afraid she's here to stay." I handed him the headband, and the way he held it, fist tense, knuckles and fingers clutching it to never let go, while his eyes travelled again to thoughts and memories that were no doubt about her, made me understand that, definitely, Alice was here to stay. I decided to give Aro some peace of mind now, and headed for the door. He didn't notice when I left.

I went to see my brother, who was talking with Caius in one of the 'living rooms' –spaces that each of the Trio kept for more private enjoyments, like reading, writing, or studying, little pleasures far away from official duties. Alec and I engaged in a game of chess at Caius' feet. The game prevented us from doing any actual thinking and Caius also found some amusement in watching and helping each of us in turn to win. A little after 10 pm Aro came out of his study, and shortly afterwards Marcus (who had vanished just before I took the blood to Aro) arrived as well.

"How is she, Marcus?" inquired Aro. "I know you went to see her, there's no point pretending. How is she?"

Marcus looked at his brother with a hint of exasperation. "Well, how do you expect her to be? She locked herself up in her room. She has been throwing up. I don't know if this is normal for humans, but when I arrived she was in the shower and spent at least an hour washing herself."

"Did you talk to her?"

"No, of course not. The last thing she wants is any reminder of you and what you did to her. I just watched her from outside her window. That child is broken. She's tense, and anxious. She hasn't eaten well, and, like I said, throws up what little she manages to ingest. She hasn't done much, she showered again a couple of times, then tried to sleep, but couldn't. When I left she was alternating between reading, rocking herself back and forth on her bed, and drinking as much coffee as she could possibly take."

"Has she talked to anyone?"

"No. Her parents just got home, and given the time it is they must have assumed she's asleep, so they haven't seen her. She did take out her cell phone once, but then shoved it under her bed."

"If she hasn't said anything, then she won't. Perhaps tomorrow, if someone notices and asks her, she'll say something, but I doubt it."

"She'll have problems with having her story believed, this has all been too bizarre," intervened Caius. "She will probably try to pretend nothing happened and to go on with her regular life."

No one was really sure of what would happen next, and an uncomfortable silence set around the room. Luckily for me, sunrise was close by now, and I wanted to go see it in the garden. It also provided a great excuse to get away from the madhouse that the castle had become. Alec went with me, and we sat together on a bench to watch the sun come up. It felt nice to not think about anything, to just empty our minds and watch the sunlight glitter off our skins. About an hour after sunrise, we heard steps behind us.

"Hey," a voice greeted us softly.

Chelsea. She came alone, and seemed to have good intentions. This was all so weird, she and I had been in bad terms for more than a hundred years, and awful terms for a hundred before those.

"Do you mind?" she looked at the empty spot beside me.

"Be my guest."

"I'll give you girls some privacy," said Alec. He got to his feet, kissed the top of my head, and left. Chelsea and I exchanged tentative looks. It had been so long…

"So… you've heard about Aro and Alice," she began.

"Yes. I was there when he told us."

"Of course you were. He's really done something this time, hasn't he?" Chelsea's attempts at small talk were failing miserably. It was evident that she was troubled, and confused.

"What is it?" I finally asked. "Just say it. That's why you're here, isn't it?"

She toyed with the hem of her robe before answering. "Yes. I just… I can't forgive him, Jane."

"Chelsea, don't say that. We owe him everything we are and have. Especially _us._" The nobodies, the lost girls, the little children to whom Aro had been a mentor and a father, a saviour and a guide. We would be dead if it hadn't been for him. He had given us a life, a name, a home, he had rebuilt us.

"I know, but… What he did was monstrous, it has no name. We both know what it's like, Jane, we've been there." She meant, of course, the attacks we had suffered as prisoners in our human life. The aggressions attempted on me had only been that, attempts, but Chelsea had gotten the real thing. I had no reply for her. Of course I knew. "And she's a child!" she continued. "She's just a child! For God's sake, how could he do that to a _child_?"

She was right, it had been a monstrous thing, but I couldn't bring myself to betray Aro by admitting it to Chelsea. "I'm no one to judge his actions. This will get sorted out, one way or the other."

"And in the meantime he'll have destroyed a girl's innocence with no reason and no going back." She stopped here, then made another comment. "I've never seen her, but I hear she's very beautiful."

"She is." _Too goddamn beautiful for her own good, and everyone else's._

"Poor kid. Her beauty is, and will always be, her curse." Chelsea sighed, and, to my surprise, placed one of her hands on mine. "I missed you, Jane. I missed talking to you." What did she mean by that? We were friends once, was she now saying that we could rebuild that relationship? Was that even possible anymore? Tentatively, I smiled at her (or made a grimace somewhat resembling a smile, anyway), and she returned it. Then, again, she looked worried. "We'll have to wait and see what happens. Hopefully she still has a chance of a normal life."

We looked at each other, and we saw in each other's eyes what we were thinking: there wasn't a way for Alice's life to be normal again. All the events of these months, not just today's attack, had reshaped her and turned her into a different person. She certainly was no longer the fun, loving little girl we had met nine months ago. She had changed too much and too soon. Well, that would teach her. She had to toughen up to make it alive in this world. Maybe this wasn't the best way, but it would help her in the long run. She needed to grow up. After today, she was no longer a child.

Aro kept a discreet vigilance over Alice during the next few weeks. We managed to convince him that she needed some time, she needed to pull herself together, and she needed to do it on her own. He obviously couldn't talk to her directly, or even try to see her from afar, so once or twice a week he had someone go and check that she was fine. One of those times he sent my brother. When Alec returned, I sensed in his report something I'd already perceived in others', that he wasn't telling him the whole story. Yes, he was truthful and honest, but he was keeping the details to himself. When, later, I asked him about it, he finally told me everything.

"Jane, I'm no expert, but that girl is terribly damaged, she needs help desperately. She has never cried, or complained, she tries to carry on, but I'd never seen anyone more hurt. Did you know she has nightmares?"

"I'd heard something about it." Both Felix and Demetri had mentioned the nightmares in their reports when they watched Alice overnight. In both of them I had noticed the look that had worried me in Alec's eyes and that now made me ask him upfront.

"Well, I've seen it, and it's horrible. She tries everything she can not to fall asleep, but of course she eventually fails. She starts twitching in bed, and then whimpering. Then there's the talking, mumbling, and it sounds as if she's begging. It goes on, she curls in herself, like a baby, and continues imploring. Sometimes she even sobs. None of that wakes her up, though. It's a deep, deep sleep. When she does wake up, it's all of a sudden, and she has to turn the lights on, check everywhere in her room, and even open her window and look outside to calm down a bit and go back to sleep. It's hell for her. It's just so cruel!"

I heard in my brother's voice the same tone of indignation that I'd perceived in Chelsea that day in the garden. They both were furious at Aro for what he'd done to Alice, and it seemed to me that they were changing sides. This whole ordeal with Alice had brought an enormous wave of confusion in our household; only a few supported Aro without question. I was among them, for my ties to him were far too unbreakable, and even I had a tickle in my conscience. Others were even more uncertain. Should a conflict arise, where would their allegiances be? What if Alec's was different from mine? Where would then my own loyalty be? And what with Alice? What would happen between her and Aro? She would never take him willingly now, but Aro would not let her go, not anymore. She could not live with him, and he could not live without her. Who would win? Could there even be a winner, or were we all just losers, no matter the result?

_She's sitting on a park bench, finishing a coffee. The weather is bitterly cold, but she seems unfazed by the wind and the dark sky. She likes winter, he remembers. Once she's finished with the coffee, she gets up and starts walking. When she sees him, for the first time she actually slows down, lets him catch up. He stands before her and she only moves slightly to avoid contact._

"_Alice, darling, how lovely to see you again. How are you?" She says nothing. "I've been thinking about you, about that wonderful last time…" he comes closer, strokes her cheek with the back of his hand. As always, she steps back, but her manner has changed. She doesn't meet his eyes, her arms are wrapped around her torso, and unless he's much mistaken, there's a faint trembling of her body. When he touches her, he notices something else. "Oh, my, what is that?" he takes her by the chin and raises her head. She still won't look at him, but he can see that a side of her face is swollen, and so are her eyes. "You look like you haven't slept in a week. Have you been crying? And there's almost a bruise here. Has anyone hurt you?"_

_She nods slowly. "My parents. My father." Her voice is almost a whisper._

"_And why?"_

"_Because… because…" she takes a breath that sounds like a sob. She closes her eyes, then opens them and they dig deep into his own. "Because I'm pregnant."_


	39. And all Hell breaks loose

**And all Hell breaks loose**

"What did you say?"

"I'm pregnant."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Are you completely sure?" He takes her by the shoulders, glues his gaze on hers, shakes her lightly. "Alice, this is important. Are you completely sure?"

"Yes! I'm sure. I wouldn't play with something like this. I'm pregnant."

"Oh God. Oh God." He places his arms around her, delicately, carefully, and hugs her like she's the frailest thing in the world. "Oh God," he repeats.

"Get your hands off me," she says, shaking him off without any of that delicacy. "I told my parents everything. That you stalked me, that you harassed me, that you raped me." _They don't believe me. God, they don't believe me. My father hit me and accused me of being a liar and a whore. _"I need you to come with me. They want to talk to you about this whole thing." _When they see him they'll understand who he is and what he's done to me. They have to believe me. They have to believe me._

"Of course, of course, I'll go with you. We can go right now, if you want." He places his hands on her stomach, carefully and tenderly. "Six weeks, isn't it?"

"Yes." Six weeks already. It feels like yesterday. "Six weeks. We're just in time."

"In time for what?"

"An abortion. That's what I wanted to tell you about. I was hoping you were following me and we could talk."

"An abortion? Are you serious?"

"Yes. I don't want this child, and neither do you. What you wanted from me you already got. You got to amuse yourself with me. Now you will pay for the abortion, and then you will disappear from my life forever."

Aro looks at her, this tiny girl who's announcing her determination to kill his baby. He puts his hands on her shoulders, this time digging his fingers like claws, and speaks slowly.

"Alice, you will not have an abortion. You won't."

"I cannot have your child, Aro. I cannot bring a permanent memory of what you did to me, I want to forget and get rid of everything that has to do with you, including this, especially this." She points to her stomach. "I don't want this baby."

"But I do! Listen, having a child with you is the most wonderful thing that's ever happened. Don't make that face! I'm going to tell you something. There is nothing in my life, in all these millennia of life, that I have wanted more than a child. Until I met you. I was willing to put that wish aside, as long as you could be with me. Yet now you tell me that you are expecting my child. You, precisely you! A baby with you is a miracle far greater than anything I could have imagined and-"

She cuts him abruptly. "What you wanted was to fuck me. You did it. And what I want right now is to get this thing out of me as soon as possible."

"You will not kill it! It's my child!"

"That's exactly why I want to kill it!"

He raises his hand to hit her, but stops himself on time.

"Are you going to hit me again?" she asks coldly, recalling how he beat her that day to subject her more easily.

"No. I'm sorry. But Alice, think about it. It's not safe. It could get you killed."

She snorts. "Do you think any of this is safe? Do you think the pregnancy or the birth can't kill me just as easily? Besides, we still have to see what kind of monster you have created in me, mister bloodsucker, maybe _it_ will kill me. I'm well aware of all that, I've done my research, and I'm still going to take the risk. I'd rather die that have your child."

Dealing with her is impossible. "We need to discuss this more calmly. You said your parents wanted to talk to me, let's do it. Let's go."

"Fine. But you're not getting away with this, any of this."

"Neither are you. Come on, here's my car."

Alice's confidence falters. On the other side of the street is the black van where she was so brutally forced. Flashbacks assault her. He'd had to cover her mouth so that her cries wouldn't be heard. He had boasted to her about being her first one, insisting she should be grateful to have done it with someone experienced. He had blamed the attack on her, for having tempted him and then refused. The bruises and scratches took longer than usual to fade.

"No," she says abruptly, "let's go on foot."

"But here's the car, I will drive you-"

"No. Let's just walk. I live close from here, as you must perfectly know."

She simply can't go inside that car. She can't handle the memories. Besides, what if he decides to hurt her again, taking advantage of the privacy in the van?

They start walking. Her steps are quick and angry, she tries to hurry in order to spend as little time as possible in his company.

"How long have you known?" asks Aro. How can something so important have escaped all of his informants? If he kept a watch on her it was precisely so he could know about things like this.

"Couple of weeks."

"Why hadn't you told me?"

"I didn't know where to find you. I'm not the stalker here, you know. I had to wait for you to follow me around."

He tries to touch her arm, hold her hand. She shakes him off quickly and angrily.

"Don't touch me."

He replies with a hint of irony. "Haven't I already touched you enough?"

Suddenly, she stops. She takes deep breaths, closes her eyes, tries to swallow, and puts a hand to her stomach.

"Alice, what is it? Are you alright?"

She looks up, and colour returns slowly her face. "Yes. I was just… I felt a little nauseous." The mention of his touch on her brings back the sickness she has been fighting these weeks; the child inside her has been awakening every possible symptom. The memory of his hands all over her body is much too fresh and revolting, if she adds her pregnancy to that…

When they arrive to Alice's house her confidence fails again; she knows everyone is against her. Her father is a very strict man and refuses to believe her, rather, he thinks this is all caused by her lack of moral and common sense. Her mother is unsure, Alice can tell, but she won't stand against her father; besides, she too is very angry and disappointed. And Aro… he has humiliated her in the worst of ways. He doesn't care about what she feels or thinks. The words he told her as he forced himself on her come back to her mind: _You're alone, don't you see? There's no one to help you. Just give up._

But she won't. Not without a fight. Even as she sees Aro charm his way with her parents, as she hears him pour honey and lies in their ears while her own words are disregarded and ignored, she is going to fight.

"Mr. Brandon, I love your daughter. I assure you that my intentions with her are formal and sincere, now more than ever. I have already proposed to her. I want to do this the proper way."

"You hadn't told us about that, Alice. When did it happen?"

"Before he raped me."

"Please, Alice, we need to be civil here."

"And raping me was civil? He wanted me to marry him, and since I refused he decided to force me instead."

Aro intervenes, and his voice is all velvet while he looks at Alice condescendingly and talks to her parents. "I give you my word that there has been no violence in our relationship. I have courted her, yes, but only with the most serious and honest wishes, I made that clear to her since the beginning. Now that she's expecting my child I would consider it more than appropriate that we formalize our union. I love Alice. I really do."

Alice's parents look at each other, confused, tired, exasperated, angry. Alice watches them, and prays silently. Finally, her father makes his decision. "Very well sir. So, to sum it up: my daughter is pregnant and you are the father of that child. A rather unfortunate event, but there's not much that can be done about it."

"There is! Papa, I don't want this baby! I can't have it, I won't have it."

"Alice, stop it. I refuse to hear any more nonsense about this abortion thing. It's too dangerous. If you didn't want this to happen, you should have considered the weight of your actions beforehand."

"Papa, please, believe me, I didn't want to, he abused me, please, I'm telling the truth, I really am."

"Enough. As I was saying before this interruption, we have a situation we need to fix immediately." He turned to Aro. "You claim your feelings for Alice are sincere, and you have already expressed your wish to marry her and assume responsibility for her child. Very well. I think that's the best course for all of us. We cannot have Alice be a single mother, that is absolutely out of the question. We must try to protect what little of her reputation and honour is left. Alice will marry you."

"No. No, no, no, no! I won't!" Alice gets up from the couch she has been sharing with Aro, in front of her parents. "I will not marry him! He has done horrible things to me, he has tormented me, he… Please. I can't marry him."

"We will not discuss the matter any further. Alice, do stop lying and face what you have done. You chose to give yourself without any dignity, and you have one chance to repair the damage. You will marry the father of your child. End of discussion."

In a sudden, desperate act, Alice throws herself at her father's feet. "Papa, Papa, Papa, please, don't do this, I beg you, Papa, please. You have no idea what he's done to me. Kill me if you want to, but don't give me to him. Don't, I implore you, please, Papa."

"Alice," Aro begins, "I think it would be better if you went upstairs to rest-"

"Shut up! You have no right to tell me what to do!"

"Alice, Alice, honey, come with me. You're not well."

"Mama, please, don't let them do this to me. Tell them, Mama, help me."

Aro ignores her, talks to her father as if nothing is happening. "I will be back later, to discuss some finer details about this. I… I would prefer it if Alice wasn't present. This has all been too disturbing for her, and she's in a very special condition. I don't want to upset her more than necessary."

"That's fine with me. Alice, go to your room, you need some rest. When everything about the marriage is sorted out we'll let you know."

_Alec's POV_

Aro's anger was palpable in the air.

"And why exactly wasn't I informed of this? How could all of you have missed it? Or maybe you knew, and chose to keep it from me? What happened?"

He kept roaring while those of us he had sent to watch Alice tried to explain why we hadn't realized she was pregnant. Truth was, none of us knew how to identify that kind of girl stuff. And how could we, anyway, if she had been showing such altered behaviour since the day Aro had abused her? It was almost impossible to tell the difference between the sequels of the rape, the symptoms of her pregnancy, and the changes she'd been through since meeting Aro. Of course, no one told him that; instead, we all took the reprimand silently and asked him to forgive us. While he went on shouting I focused on my sister. When she had first heard the news, her eyes had gone wide, her pretty lips parted open in surprise, and I could swear she looked paler. Then she had looked down and retreated to the back of the room, where she now stood, motionless as a statue, and still looking down. I could see her teeth were clenched and her small hands were balled into tight fists; God knew what she was tormenting herself with.

Finally, Aro dismissed us all. I took my sister's hand and led her to the rooms we shared. It was obvious that she needed some privacy. What Jane did as soon as we were alone was as unexpected as it was painful. She threw herself onto the divan and let out a long, sorrowful cry. She buried her face in one of the pillows and began sobbing quietly.

"Jane," I said, sitting beside her, "don't let him do this to you."

"Shut up."

"Please."

"He had her one time, Alec, one time, and she got pregnant. When had that happened? What is she? How did she do it?"

"Jane, Jane, listen. How many girls has he had? Ten? Fifty? A hundred? And how many have actually made it? Some miscarried, some died, some others you have killed yourself. Not one of them has been successful. What makes you think she will? Fine, she conceived the first time he took her, but that's just an irrelevant stroke of luck. With her age, her relationship with Aro, and everything that's going on, she's essentially up for a death sentence."

"No, Alec, not her. This one will make it."

"Why are you so sure about it?"

"Because she doesn't want to. She hates him. Look, all those other girls, Marguerithe, Luciana, Alyona, Sara, all of them, I remember how much they adored him. They worshipped Aro and lived only to make him happy. The more they love him, the sooner they fail. Alice despises him, and that will make the difference. He can't have it both ways, love and kid. He had the love of all those girls, but he didn't have the child. Now he will never, ever have Alice's love, but he will get her baby." She paused. "And there's something else. With all the other girls, he only slept with them to make them conceive. He had no interest in them as women, he didn't love them or anything remotely like that. Alice is the first girl he wants for herself. He wasn't looking for a child with her, he wanted to have _her_, even if he had to give up his greatest dream, and because he stopped trying he did it." She punched the pillow. "I hate her!"

"Why don't you kill her, then?" She had done it before, she could do it again if she was so hurt by Alice's existence.

Jane shook her head. "I should have, when I had the chance. But now he's got all this protection and surveillance around her and it will be impossible at all to touch her. There is nothing I can do. And he's marrying her! Marrying her!"

She began to sob again, and then got up and began walking around the room. There was a spark in her eyes that I had only seen when we destroyed our home village, when she had gotten rid of Aleida, and when she had killed Marguerithe. I hated seeing that look on her, it made her become a monster I did not know, and who terrified me. When she was like that she was capable of anything.

Nothing I told her could calm her down. All she could do was walk, curse Alice, swear she would kill her, cry because she couldn't, and then curse her luck and her entire life. Finally, she stormed out of the room, slamming the window as she jumped. I followed her, but she was always faster and more elusive than me. I went out to find her, desperately trying to figure out where she could be before she did something stupid, and ran across every street of Volterra looking for her, praying that neither of us would get caught under the bright sunlight before I could get her home safely.

It was almost dusk when I found her. My sister sat peacefully on a meadow, looking towards the horizon while the bodies of at least fifty people lay on a pile behind her. When I looked closely I saw the expressions in their faces and knew they had all been tortured by her before dying. None bore any bite marks, but they did have a lot of broken bones, smashed faces, and even torn limbs; she had not drunk from them, rather, she had used them to vent out the hatred she could not place on the actual person. I remembered how Aro had killed young girls that looked that Alice because he couldn't bring himself to hurt the real her. My little sister was following those monstrous steps. I found a pair of rocks I could rub to make fire and set the whole pile aflame. As the bodies burned I went to sit beside Jane and hugged her. Eventually she hugged me back.

"I have one small comfort," she said slowly. "Her life is going to be one living hell."

It is almost midnight when Alice hears voices downstairs. She has been in her room waiting as patiently as she can, pretending to be asleep, pretending she drank the tea into which her mother dissolved a sedative, and now that Aro has returned to talk with her parents she walks as quietly as she can to hide behind a wall and eavesdrop.

It's her father speaking. "The wedding needs to take place as soon as possible, before word about her pregnancy spreads."

"I fully agree with you. Two weeks?"

"Perfect. I would prefer a very discreet ceremony, so that her image is not compromised in any way…"

"As you wish. After the wedding she will come to live with me, I assure you she'll want for nothing."

"We are sure of that, and appreciate your efforts to protect her. This has been a tough period… she was always a good girl…" her father is sounding angry again.

"She still is. The best one I've ever met. Oh, by the way, I have something for you." Alice hears the sound of ripping paper. She gathers courage to take a brief peek and sees Aro give her father a check.

Alice's parents exchange a look and then her dad attempts to return the check. "Oh, please, I assure you that's not necessary, we-"

"Please, do allow me. Consider it as a sort of dowry, my token to show you that she and her child will be protected in every way. They shall have any comfort they require. Besides, if I recall correctly, some funds were required to close a certain deal…?"

Alice's father looked a bit surprised. "She told you about it?"

_I didn't, I didn't, how did he find out about that? _"It might have slipped. Please, accept it. We're family now." Aro gave him the check again, and this time it was accepted. _He's buying me. Seven hells, he's buying me. It better be an awful lot of money._

As Aro leaves, he looks in Alice's way._ Of course he knows I'm here. _Their eyes meet and he allows himself a brief, triumphant smile. He winks at her and she hides completely behind the wall again, embarrassed and sad and angry. She runs back to her bedroom, trying to deal with the fact that she was just sold by her parents to a man who has caused her the worst possible damage and whose child she's being forced to carry; he now owns her as he would own an object. In the dim moonlight she sees the tea her mother left her, still on the table. It's cold now, of course, but the sedative in it will still be just as powerful. She hates to give in, but it's the only way she can sleep tonight, and she needs to be well rested to come up with a good plan. She drinks the tea as fast as she can and then curls up in her bed, falling asleep before reality catches up with her.


	40. Almost

**Almost**

The two weeks of Aro's 'engagement' to Alice were the busiest we'd had in decades. The last time we'd had a human move with us it had been Marguerithe, centuries ago, and even that couldn't compare to Alice's arrival. The majority of the guard had never seen her, and even those of us who had could only observe her from a distance but had never talked to her, so everyone was filled with anticipation and curiosity about what Aro's child bride would look like, how she would act, how she would _be_. I could see that the entire household would be turned upside down to accommodate her, and even before she came her influence could be felt all around the place.

The biggest change was the conditioning of Aro's private wing of the castle, which had to be prepared for two humans, Alice and her baby. The nursery we could work on later, for there were still months to go and Aro wanted Alice to be very involved with those preparations. However, we did have to prepare a room to be Alice and Aro's; it would mainly be hers because Aro would only pay her Zeus-like visits, but everything had to be done according to his taste and preferences. The greatest challenge was that Aro demanded to have the room soundproofed so that everything that happened outside could be heard inside, but no one could hear anything that went on in there. The nursery would be right next to their room, both spaces overlooking the garden. The floor downstairs was to have a small kitchen and a library filled with every book in history so that Alice could keep reading as much as she liked –this was important because it was more than obvious that after the wedding she wouldn't go to school anymore, but Aro wanted her to be just as smart and educated as always.

But despite the frenzy, we faced no major problems. We were used to handling crisis and we quickly figured out how to be ready on time. There was only one incident, two or three days after Aro announced he was marrying his Alice, and it was only between the two of them. One of the boys returned from his watching shift with disturbing news.

"Sir, I have to inform you… about Alice…"

He immediately looked up. "What about her?"

The boy looked uncomfortable. "She… the girl has been drinking Black Cohosh and Angelica infusions. And…last night she drank… pennyroyal. Considerable amounts."

Aro's eyes turned cold with fury. Each careful line of his face was covered by the same wrath. He was so irate and shocked he couldn't speak or move for a while. I could sense the outrage from other members of the guard, from his brothers –yes, even Marcus, who had always sided with her, looked angry now. Alec and I exchanged glances as we heard the news. Pennyroyal was a known abortive herb, and so were all the others.

Little by little Aro regained his ability to speak, "When did this start?"

"A couple of days ago, sir."

"And why wasn't I told 'a couple of days ago'?"

"We…" the guard looked embarrassed. "We didn't know the herbs were for that, sir. It wasn't until we mentioned it to the girls that they told us."

Renata rolled her eyes as if it all should have been obvious. Which it was, actually, even I knew that much.

Aro was simply furious. "You're nothing but a lot of useless fools! Alina, Maya, Gillian," the mentioned girls ran to his side. "You will be in charge of Alice from now on, until she comes here." He addressed the boys again. "So must I put my girls as guards? Aren't you capable of something as simple as that? You idiots." He sighed, exasperated. "If that whore thinks she can kill my child she'll soon learn how wrong she is." He got up, and for all I knew he was ready for murder.

"Where are you going?" asked Caius. Concern was drawn on everybody's face; of course we were angry at her, but the worry of how upset he would be if he killed her was stronger.

"To teach her a lesson."

With that, he stormed out of the room.

. . . .

Aro doesn't bother to hide, or to arrive with the pretext of an informal visit: he comes right through her window. Her parents are home and they can't know he's here, so he immediately catches her from behind and covers her mouth.

"It's me," he says while she squirms in his arms. "Shut up. Don't make noise." He waits until she's stopped moving to release her.

"What the hell do you want?" she asks when she's finally free.

He doesn't answer; instead he uses his refined sense of smell to detect the herbs, and finally finds them hidden under her mattress. The bag contains easily a month's supply, but he suspects that she's consuming them much faster than that.

"Explain this," he barks, waving the bag right in front of her.

"What do you care?" she says with disdain. Then, seeing his expression, she continues. "I bought them from a healer lady in a market. She said they were very effective in case of emergencies."

"Emergencies as in pregnancies."

"Yes."

Aro paces around the girl's room, trying to control his anger. There was something else he was told that he needs to discuss with her.

"You went to see two doctors this week, what did you want with them?"

She looks taken aback by the question. "Who told you about that?"

"That's none of your business. I have people checking on you permanently, I've always had. What did you want from these doctors?"

"I… I just wanted to know how things are going. A pregnancy isn't something you can just leave like that, it needs attention." But Alice bites her lip as she speaks, and he knows she's keeping information from him.

"Don't lie to me, Alice, it's never going to work. Now tell me, what did you want?"

She purses her lips, starting to be afraid of his reactions. "I wanted to know if they could help me, if… if they could find a way to get rid of it."

"And what did they tell you?"

"They refused," she says, and anger starts to show on her side, too. "Firstly, because it's illegal and they didn't want to get in trouble. Then, because of my age, they said that I'm too young, and that I'm too _small_. One of them told me it was safer to continue the pregnancy, or at least less dangerous." There is bitterness in her voice as she remembers. Both doctors had outright refused to perform an abortion, even after she had explained the situation to them; she told them she had been abused and if she had the child she would be forced to marry her attacker, but still they refused. It would almost certainly kill her. One of them had suggested giving the baby up for adoption, but she knew that Aro would make that impossible. On her way home she had seen the market and all the herbs that were sold there and decided it was worth giving it a shot.

"So that's why you tried the herbs," Aro says. "No doctor was going to help you, so you decided to do it yourself."

She nods. Aro is shocked by how determined she is to get rid of their baby, it's horrifying. He takes two steps closer to her, and she steps back. The chasing continues, and when he has her cornered against a wall he touches her face very lightly. Her heartbeat starts to accelerate, she's scared.

He speaks slowly and softly. "Listen, baby girl, you are expecting _my_ child, and you will have it. Period. It's not a decision you can make on your own." He places a hand on her stomach. "This baby is mine as much as yours. You will not hurt my child."

Alice frees herself. "How can you tell me something like that? After everything you've done to me? Really? You have no authority to tell me what to do. I'll find a way, have no doubts about that."

"Alice, it's our baby, it's-"

"Our baby? This is some goddamn monster you left in me! I will do whatever it takes to get rid of this thing! I will rip it out if I have to! I hate it, I hate it, I hate it! I hate you, but I hate your child even more! Even if you make me have it, even if I have to give birth to this thing, I'll strangle it as soon as it's out! I'll drown it! I'll throw it out the window! I will kill it myself, I will kill it with my own hands, I'll-"

"Shut up!" he roars, and slaps her across the face. "Don't ever, ever, say something like that again, do you hear me? Don't you dare!"

The blow threw her onto the bed. Slowly, she raises her hand and presses it to her burning cheek. He leans forward, grabs her hair and pulls it to raise her head so that she looks at him. From the corridor comes the voice of Alice's mother.

"Alice, are you alright? We thought we heard shouting."

Aro gives Alice a warning look. "I'm- I'm fine," she calls. "It's just the TV."

They hear her mother walk away. Aro gleams with satisfaction at the power he now has over her. When he speaks to her again, that authority is clear.

"This is _my _child, and you will not harm it! Should I catch you trying any of these things again, you'll wish you were never born. This can be easy, or this can be hard, and it's entirely up to you. We are getting married in two weeks, whether you like it or not." He pulls her hair harder, and she whimpers in pain. "I can make your life a torment if you displease me, so you would be wise to learn and be prudent from now on. This is only the first of many children that you will give me, and God help you if you try anything to stop it. I am always watching you, Alice, I know every single thing that you do, and you are not getting away with any of this nonsense."

She's on the bed, and he's hovering over her. For a moment he toys with the idea of having her, right now, right this minute. Even angry at her, he finds he desires her more than anything. She reads the intention in his eyes and shots back a defying glare. In response, he releases her disdainfully and laughs at her.

"What is that for, sweetheart? I could take you if I wanted to. Then again, I could kill you. Or beat you, or use you however I see fit. And what would you do then? How exactly would you stop me? You are under my control, is that clear? I own you."

He takes her face in his hands, very carefully, and pecks her on the cheek where he hit her. Then he kneels to be eye-level with her, takes one of her hands between his, and kisses it. Alice doesn't have the energy to repel him anymore; she knows he will always catch her.

"I don't want to hurt you. I love you. But if you make me angry again you'll regret it, understood?" In another life Alice would have replied to that, told him exactly what he could do with his threats. Yet now she's starting to see who he really is, and she realizes she cannot fight him in any way. She clenches her teeth and nods, looks down so she doesn't have to see the mixture of anger, lust and hatred with which his gaze travels all over her body. He sighs, and then continues. "We're getting married in a week and a half. Once that's done you'll come to live with me. You will have our baby and we will raise it together. There is no other way for us, so don't waste your time thinking of how to escape it: whatever you try won't work. Is that clear?"

"Yes," Alice manages.

"Good. Everything is being prepared for you and our child, you'll love life in the castle, you'll see. I probably won't see you again until the wedding, but I will be around. Be careful." The double meaning of his last sentence is clear. She nods again. "Excellent. I'm glad I made my point. Don't play around with me, Alice, because I never lose."

He puts the bag with the herbs in his pocket and looks one last time at her. And then, just like that, he's gone.


	41. The Child Bride

**The**** Child Bride**

Alice and Aro got married in a very small and private ceremony, attended only by those directly involved. It took a lot of document forgery and bribing to get everything right and to make someone agree to marry them, but we managed to do it in record time.

Of our household only Caius and Marcus were present. I certainly preferred to be completely left out; I don't think I would have been able to stand watching him tie himself to her for ever. Instead, I looked over the last details before their arrival; everything had to be perfect for Aro's child bride. When they got home everyone was already gathered in the Main Hall to greet them. It was the first time we would have the chance to see Alice up close, to talk to her and have her know about us. Needless to say, the castle was buzzing with excitement. The night before the wedding Aro had visited her again to tell her what she would need to know to adapt to this new life; she already knew we were vampires and we were on top of everybody else, but she needed details. He would probably tell her more on their way to the castle and we would do the rest.

They arrived. She wore a simple, light blue dress (apparently she had refused to wear white, claiming she had no purity left) and no accessories. Her pregnancy didn't show yet, but it wouldn't be long before it did. On her left finger a beautiful diamond ring was already in place. Aro, impeccable in a black suit, had an arm around her shoulders, and the absolute joy of being with her was clear on his face; meanwhile wAlice was trying to keep her face as expressionless as possible, though I could see some veiled frustration and terror. Aro walked and moved enthusiastically, while she followed without saying a word. He began introducing everyone, explaining a little of what they did and what their job was. She greeted everyone politely, with that soft voice of hers that was quickly charming its way through the guard. Despite the weird atmosphere, we did enjoy a particularly funny moment when she met Felix, who was almost twice her size and who greeted her with a huge grin and the promise that he would show her 'how to have fun in this place'. It was the only time she managed some sort of a smile.

We were the last ones to be presented. Alec held my hand when they approached us, knowing I was ready to run away first chance I had.

Aro stopped in front of us, beaming. "These are Jane and Alec," he announced proudly. "They are my right hand, they have my full trust. Anything you need, anything you want, please come to them."

Alice looked at us, examining us the way she had with everyone else. Our eyes met. She assessed me with curiosity, but she didn't seem hostile; she was just trying to figure out who I was and what part I would play in her life. Face to face, so close, I could finally appreciate her, and I confirmed she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Even in stillness she was graceful and elegant. If she wanted, if she knew how, she could be irresistible. She was young, and looked her age, but the sudden changes in her life had definitely forced her to mature and now she was like a miniature adult. Her voice was firm, though lifeless.

"Hello," she said.

Alec answered with a bow of his head. "Welcome. We'll do everything we can to ensure you feel comfortable here. If there's anything you require or that you would like, don't hesitate to ask." He squeezed my hand and I bowed as well, mumbling some sort of welcome.

Aro seemed delighted with this meeting. He placed a hand on Alice's shoulder and the other on mine and began talking even more excitedly. "I'm sure you two will bond and become great friends." He kissed my hand as he turned to Alice. "If it wasn't for this girl I would be lost. She truly is a blessing in my life." I didn't have time to be flattered by his words, because then he turned back to me. "Jane, I want you to assist Alice directly. There's no one else in this world I would trust my wife with except you. Take good care of her. Be a sister to her."

Wait, what? Me, assisting her? So I was to become Alice's maid? Who did he think I was? Why was he doing that to me, forcing me to do such a thing? How could he possibly think we could ever be like _sisters_? I began to feel the fury inside me, but a warning look from Alec stopped me on time.

"Yes, Master. It will be a pleasure."

"Wonderful! Now, my love, let me show you our rooms. Our wing of the castle is the east wing, the one that looks over the gardens. The girls have been working day and night to have it ready for you. There's a library there, oh, you will love the library! And the nursery! You have to see our baby's nursery! We have begun to work on it, but of course you can make any changes you want and…"

He kept on talking while he led her upstairs. Chelsea, Renata, my brother, and I followed, for we had been directly in charge of the renovations and therefore could show her around. Alice showed no interest and perhaps even disdain when she saw the nursery, a fact that was noticed by everyone except Aro, who apparently saw the whole thing as the funniest and loveliest ever.

Finally, he left her alone to settle in the room they would share. I was hoping to finally get some rest from the happy couple when Aro called me again.

"Jane?"

"Yes, Master?"

"Go with Alice. I want you to help her to get ready."

Of course, the wedding night. I had seen Alice go pale at the sight of the bed, I had heard her hear accelerate. This was a night we were both dreading to our very soul.

But Aro's eyes gleamed with anticipation. "You will find some clothes for her inside the pink bag by the bed. I want her in that, no excuses."

I went upstairs, to Alice's room and found her unpacking. She hadn't brought much; most of what she had wouldn't suit her new life. She had her books, all her books, clothes (though the walk-in closet was now full of more outfits she could possibly wear in a lifetime), some accessories. She unpacked slowly, as if she felt that once she was done she would finally be settled here for good.

I gathered courage to speak to her. "Hello. Aro sent me to help you out with all this."

"Oh. I see. Jane, right?"

"Yes. My name is Jane." _My name is Jane, and I'll be your waitress this morning. Would you like some coffee to start with? _This was the most ridiculous thing that had ever happened to me.

She opened the last box of books and took out one. It was a Bible. She opened it, passed some pages, examined the whole thing. Then, with a flicker of disdain in her eyes, she tossed it into the fire of the fireplace.

"Why did you do that?" I asked, curious. "Don't you believe in God?"

"I used to, she replied. "But it seems a lifetime ago. God either doesn't exist or is the cruellest, most perverse creature in the Universe. A kind, almighty God wouldn't let this happen to me."

I told her nothing; I understood. Instead I found the bag Aro had told me about, and took out the outfit for her wedding night.

"Here," I told her. "He wants you to wear this tonight."

When she saw the clothes I had laid down for her, her heartbeat slowed down. "Jane?" she whispered.

I turned around. She had turned a shade between white and green, and seemed to grow smaller and smaller by the second.

"Yes, Alice?"

"I won't wear this."

"Aro specifically said you have to. Put it on."

"No."

"He will see you without it anyway."

"Please. I can't."

"Alice," I began, "you have to. If he said you wear that, you wear it. Besides, it's not vulgar, or anything like that. The colour suits you. So don't be difficult and put it on." But she insisted on not wearing the damn thing. "It's your head," I finally told her, exasperated.

I brushed her hair and made sure she looked pretty for him. _This should be me, _I thought. _I should be the one getting ready. And now I'm little more than a maid._

When she was ready I left the room and went to tell my Master. He smiled like a child on Christmas morning and immediately got up. Marcus tried one last advice before he left.

"Aro, do be considerate with her. Remember she's a child."

Aro smirked and went upstairs.

. . . . . . .

_Alice's POV_

_This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening. No, please. _I paced around the room, after accepting that there was no way I could escape from it. The room was too high to jump to the gardens, and the two doors would lead me directly to him. Locking myself inside the bathroom or the closet would only be counterproductive.

I heard footsteps outside, coming closer and closer. It had to be him. The door opened. It was him.

"Alice, my love," he said softly. "My wife."

He savoured every word, while I had to fight the urge to cover my ears

"Take off the robe," he commanded.

I did, to show him that I wasn't wearing what he expected. His little outfit had returned to the bag, and I had put on one of my old pants and shirt. He chuckled and looked at me, amused. After a moment he spoke.

"Alice, how much do you know about sex?"

Taken aback by the bluntness of the question, I stammered my answer. "I… I know a few things… the basics…" I'd had a few classes at school, and then learned more the hard way.

"Much better. I will teach you everything, then. Didn't I tell you, Alice, that it was better to be with someone who knew what he was doing, instead of some inexperienced boy?"

He had, while he drove me home after… that. I pushed the memory away.

He didn't seem to notice the effect of his words and carried on talking. "Tonight I want to take things slowly. Take everything off. I didn't really get a chance to see you that time. Come on, I want to look at you."

I couldn't obey. I stood motionless, every muscle frozen. I still couldn't believe this was real. _Please don't make me do that. Don't humiliate me more than necessary._ When I felt his eyes nailed on me I wrapped my arms around my torso. Even clothed, I felt bare before him.

"Alice," he sighed. "Don't be difficult. It won't work. Come on. I just-" he reached out to touch me and I jumped back. Just the idea of his hands on me made me want to throw up. "There is nothing wrong with showing yourself to your husband. You know we're going to do it anyway, let it be easy." He reached out again, and this time he grabbed me firmly by the waist.

_How much can he hurt me?_ I thought. He'd hit me before, but surely he wouldn't beat me too hard, considering I was pregnant with his child. _This thing inside me had better be useful now. _He grabbed my shirt, and tried to remove it. I resisted him; it was a brief struggle, for what could I do to stop him? I felt him pull at my clothes while I twitched desperately in his arms. Then he slapped me, once, twice, and numbed by the blows I wasn't able to fight as he undressed me.

I was completely naked now. I tried to cover myself the best I could with my hands. It wasn't much, but at least I wasn't deliberately showing myself to him. I wouldn't give him pleasure willingly.

"Put your arms down," he commanded. "I said I want to look at you."

"Please, Aro," I heard myself say. My voice was a dry little thread. "Please don't do this to me."

He only chuckled again. "You do realize you are my wife now, don't you? This is your duty. Besides, we've already done this, so don't play the innocent little girl with me. Now let me see you."

He grabbed my wrists, forcing me to lower my arms. I clenched my teeth, forcing myself to expose my body to him and trying not to die as I did._ Don't cry, you fool, don't give him that pleasure!_

I lowered my head, unable to stand his gaze, but still I felt his eyes on my body, hungrily taking it in. He observed me for what felt an eternity. When he spoke again, his voice was little more than a growl.

"You're so beautiful…" he whispered. "You're perfect."

He took a step forward and began touching me, very softly and carefully. Then, he began kissing me, small pecks on the jaw and down the neck that quickly grew in intensity. I tried to push him away, but he only held me tighter. _This is real, this is really happening, _I thought. I suddenly felt dizzy, though whether from his monster child or from terror I couldn't tell. _Don't throw up. Don't faint. Just don't. _I felt him leading me to the bed, and sure enough, he pushed me onto it and began crawling his way over me. Once again, any attempt to resist him was useless. He caressed me slowly, chest, waist, legs, and finally he placed his hands on my knees and spread them apart. He smiled. And then it all began.

. . . . . .

_Jane's POV_

Hours later, well past midnight, I heard the door opening and Aro's footsteps. No other sound came from the room and for a second I thought he had killed her, until he came downstairs and approached me.

"Tend to her," he said.

I went into the room and found her in the bed, wrapped and tangled in the sheets. Her back was to me and she didn't seem to notice my presence. I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Alice…" I whispered tentatively.

She gasped quietly and shook, curling in herself. Then she realized it was me and not her husband and relaxed. She turned around, looked at me, and then down. Part of her face was red, hot to the touch, with purple shades already starting to show.

"He sent you?" she asked. I nodded, and then for an eternity neither of us spoke.

"Let's get you clean," I told her. "You'll feel better after a hot bath."

She got up slowly. I offered her my hand; she seemed to refuse it at first, but in the end she realized she wouldn't make it on her own. She wrapped herself in one of the sheets and walked with careful little steps using my hand as support. I led her to the bathroom, where I began to prepare everything for her.

The bathroom had every kind of lotion, cream, perfume, and soap you could possibly imagine. It was a delicate room, fragrant, very suited for her. She stepped into the bathtub and sat down. She winced slightly when the water touched her hips. Her skin was beginning to show all sorts of bruises and scratches. It took her a while, but finally she began to relax.

"Jane?"

"Yes?"

"Does it always hurt this much? Does it ever get any better?"

It took me a moment to understand what she was asking about. "Oh, well, I… I'm afraid I wouldn't know, Alice."

She looked at me, perplexed. "You've never…"

"No."

"Oh. You're not missing that much, you know."

I couldn't find anything to say about that. Instead, I helped her to wash herself, detangling her hair and finding adequate beauty products. I found some sort of first aid kit, which contained the essentials for small wounds. He must have known she would need it, he must have already planned to be rough on her. By the way she looked at the moment, he would need to wait a couple of days before being with her again.

While I worked she kept talking, more to herself as a sort of therapy than to me. "I… I just wish I knew what to do to make it hurt less, to make it be over sooner, to bear it better. I should know this. Girls should know this. But I was never taught much."

What could I tell her? I hadn't been taught anything at all. At least she had some real experience now. I couldn't help the feeling of irritation when I considered that a child her age knew more than me about such subjects. Frustrated, I tried to focus on something else, and I noticed that her wrists were beginning to turn purple, with finger marks on them; he'd probably had to hold her down. And then, as I helped her, I observed her. Even beaten and trembling, she was beautiful, all warm and soft and human. Despite her resistance she must have been quite a delight to him.

After a few minutes of silence she spoke again. "Did you know I'm pregnant?" Her voice had a raspy sound, had she screamed?

"Yes, Alice. Everyone here knows."

"Then why does he treat me like this?" She looked at her bruised wrists, the scratches on her thighs.

"He doesn't mean to. He genuinely wants to make you happy. It's just that… he hasn't quite figured out how yet. He's having a hard time learning to love you."

I could see in Alice's face that she didn't believe a word of what I'd just said. Instead, she got out of the bathtub. I wrapped her in a towel and got her clean clothes. The difference between me and a common servant girl was now inexistent; after all my centuries dwelling in politics and law and matters of life and death I had become only a servant girl.

I tended to her injuries (bruises, scratches, stuff that looked like mild bite marks) before she got dressed, and then she was ready. "I'll be available whenever you need me, ok?" I said. "My brother Alec will also help you with anything you require."

"Yes, Jane, thank you."

"Tomorrow you can get up whenever you like, when you come downstairs you can go to the kitchen and we'll get you anything you want. You're essentially the lady of the house now, so your orders must be obeyed. I suppose that, as far as household authority goes, you're only beneath Aro and his brothers now. And about your… doubts, I can have one of the other girls come and talk to you. Would you like that?"

She blushed. "I… I think I would."

"Good. I'll let you sleep now."

I made sure she was in bed and more or less asleep before leaving. I went to my own rooms and was surprised to see that my brother wasn't there. Still, that was good, for it gave me the chance to do something that made me curious while tending to Alice. I stood in front of the mirror, and little by little I began to take my clothes off. It felt strange; I'd never done it so consciously, so very aware that I was baring my body. Though I was alone, I felt a bit embarrassed, and I had to force myself to go on. Finally, I was completely naked, and I examined my reflection, trying to be objective. Truth was, my body wasn't as good as hers. Physically we were only two years apart, but our lives had been so different. I was slender because I never had enough to eat when I was human, I was in relatively good shape because I had moved a lot in my little town, cleaning the house, going to the market, running errands, fetching my father from the taverns. But my body had never been looked after for itself, it was just a consequence. Alice's body was glorious. She had always eaten well, she danced, she exercised, she cultivated the beauty she knew she had and it resulted in something stunning. I was beautiful, too, but I never did anything to enhance it or preserve it when I had the chance; now my body was frozen, and so were the hopes of ever improving it. I was softer, curvier, everything a tad fuller in me than in her. _Well, she's the one that got raped and pregnant and sold and enslaved. Serves her right._

I looked at myself for a while, trying to find some strong points in my appearance. I was beautiful, of course, I had those classic features from old times that girls didn't have nowadays. Even as a human I knew I was beautiful. I was petite and curvy, which I knew to be very attractive for some. My hair was soft and golden, longer than hers and also shinier, it was the one thing I was able to care for after my transformation, and I certainly did. I was very proud of my hair. I had a nice figure, perhaps not the super toned, super fit one, but I wasn't fat, I had no blemishes, no scars, nothing; my skin was impeccable and soft to the touch. I did have good things, what was I missing?

I got dressed again, feeling worse than ever, but with clearer ideas. I would need something really big to compete with her, something that she couldn't give him. But so far she had it all, more than I did. _I could kill her. Or I could kill her child when it's born. She doesn't want it, anyway, and that would cut all ties between her and Aro. _But no, that would only get me caught and executed. What could I do? What did he need? What did he want? My life was a mess. And while I paced and thought, and rethought and fought, I knew that what he needed and wanted slept in the other wing of the castle.


	42. Truths and news

**Truths and news**

When Alice woke up she looked a bit better. She was pale, true, and still walked with some difficulty, but she knew better than to complain. Little by little she was giving up and letting herself fall into Aro's total control, even if she liked to pretend otherwise. And, when that morning she and Aro met downstairs, he proved again his ownership of her.

"Alice, my love, you look a little pale. Wouldn't you like to go for a walk? I think that fresh air and sunlight would help you."

She put down her cup of coffee and looked at him, incredulous. "For a walk? You mean… outside?"

He laughed. "Yes, outside. Alice, you are no prisoner here. You're my wife, you are free to go wherever you like. Go shopping. Have fun. Here, take this," he handed her a wad of bills. Half the city would survive a year on that money. "You can start some baby shopping if you want. I would like to keep the gender of our baby a surprise, but I'm sure there are lots of stuff you can buy."

Alice just stared, still not believing. So did I. Was he letting her go out, just like that? Really? He _had_ to be aware that the moment she set foot out of the castle she was gone forever.

And yes, he was. "You will need protection, though. You are precious to me, and I don't want you to be in any danger. Felix, you will go with her, and make sure she stays safe. Wherever she goes you will be there to guard her. No harm can come to my wife." He kissed Alice's hand and I saw the light in her eyes go out immediately. It was obvious that what he wanted was for her to be watched and kept under control. As much as he loved her, he wasn't stupid enough to trust her. And by giving her Felix (though any of us was apt for the job, being a thousand times stronger and faster than her), he had a display of power before her that would, if not tame her, at least keep her intimidated. Felix was nice to her, but also four times her size, which she would surely keep in mind every second of her little outing.

Aro left, and Marcus, who had been nearby during the conversation, approached her.

"Alice, would you mind? I would like to talk to you."

"Um… yeah." Alice was unsure, because she still didn't know everyone too well, but there had always been something about Marcus that inspired trust. They sat on the sofa and he looked at me with an obvious message in his eyes. _Out._

. . . . . .

_Alice's POV_

Marcus seemed to be a kind man, certainly better than Aro. After Jane left he took my hand, and his voice sounded sincere when he began to speak.

"I know this is horrible for you," he said, "and I'm truly sorry."

"I don't understand him," I tried to explain. "He has a thousand sweet words for me, compliments, gifts, treats, and all of a sudden he becomes too violent, he… he insults me, he beats me, and I just don't know how to deal with him." Every night I faced him without knowing exactly who stood before me.

"You will learn with time. My brother is a very complicated man, and it's difficult to give him what he wants, because most of the times not even he knows what that is. It's our job to guess it for him, and to provide it."

"But, sir, I-"

"Please, do call me Marcus."

I hesitated, but he was kind, the first one to be truly kind to me in this place. "Marcus, don't you have just as much power as him? I mean, there are three of you, and you are all supposed to have the same authority." As I understood it, the three brothers ruled together, each of them with equal influence in all matters.

"We do, in the eyes of the world. It is much more intimidating to see three men who have absolute power over you, instead of just one. That unity gives us more strength, which is what we need to continue ruling. At home, however, it's different. Caius has other interests, personal power rather than political power. Me, well, I honestly couldn't care less. Yes, there is joy in knowing you have everyone in your hands, but I believe there is more to life than that. Aro doesn't, he lives for that, he wants to see every creature on Earth subjected to his will. He isn't used to being told _no_, if he wants something there's no stopping him until he gets it, as you very well know. He craves power, power in itself, and that is what makes him so complex and difficult to deal with.

"Now, sweetheart, I know you're miserable here, but remember this isn't only about you, it's not only about him. You're pregnant, Alice, and that child you're expecting is completely innocent. The way Aro treats you is not your baby's fault. Don't blame it."

"But I don't want it," I told him. "You know what Aro did to me, do you think I want a permanent reminder of that?" Why couldn't anyone see it? Why did everyone expect me to want that baby, knowing perfectly well the story? Every person I met wanted to see me thrilled to be carrying a child whose father was a monster.

"Don't see it that way. The baby might be Aro's, but it's also _your_ baby, and that's what you should value most. Every girl in this castle would kill to be able to have a child, and you are now blessed with one. Above all, it's yours, no one else's but yours."

I sighed. "I… I just don't know anything right now. I don't know what to do, what to say, what to think, I know nothing at all."

"That's perfectly natural, darling, this life cannot be compared to anything else. But it's the one you have, and who knows how long you will be here, so try to find your place. You have a lot of influence already, both on your husband and on the guard, use it. And please, be careful with your pregnancy. That baby will open you many doors, that baby will give you a lot, a lot of power. Just try, will you?"

I would never be able to convince him, or anyone, of what that kid meant to me. It was easier to smile and pretend. "Yes, Marcus. I will. Let's see what happens."

He got up, but then stopped and turned to me again.

"And, Alice…"

"Yes?"

"It wouldn't hurt to keep in mind at all times that he could kill you any moment."

This I wasn't expecting. "But he said he loved me. He said he wanted me to be safe."

"I know what he said. The problem here is that he loves you too much. He wants to own you, and he knows he doesn't, and that infuriates him. He hates you for not loving him as much as he loves you. I know you've had the chance to see a lot of his temper, but that's nothing compared to how he can really be like when angry. Don't provoke him, please don't. You think you're smart and strong because you fight back, and you speak your mind and you always resist him. That's foolish. You are completely, absolutely in his power, and whatever he decides to do with you, no one else can intervene. If you are difficult with him the only thing you'll get is trouble for yourself."

He left, while I sat on the sofa for a little longer, wondering what I had left that could be truly mine, now that not even my life belonged to me.

. . . . . .

_Jane's POV_

We set out to find a doctor for Alice. Aro wanted to have the best one in the world, everyone else wanted someone who could keep his mouth shut and treat her without questions. To find both qualities in the same person was a hard job, but we did it, and that very day he was brought to her. He found everything to be fine, both Alice and her child were strong and healthy. He didn't seem to notice anything strange, despite the child's nature –it seemed to be growing normally, just as any human kid. Though this surprised us, we were grateful for it.

Aro wouldn't stop intimacy with Alice because of the pregnancy. The doctor said she should be handled with care, in every situation, but that meant little to Aro, who was determined to fulfil every desire and fantasy he had ever had with her. That night wouldn't be the exception. Once again, I readied her for Aro and left. He told me not to go to her afterwards, so I had the rest of the night to myself. I told Chelsea and Renata about Alice's special doubts, and they promised they would talk to her and help her out. Soon, we were joined by Corin, Felix, Demetri and Alec, who were just returning from a clandestine hunting trip. We gathered in one of the living rooms to chat. Felix and Demetri began to tell a story of how they had once chased a pair of nomads that came to the outskirts of Volterra, and hunted them for a while before killing them. It was a very amusing story, and it made us laugh, which we very much needed. At around 4 am, we heard footsteps coming down the stairs, and a beating heart. Alice. We all got up to see what she wanted, and she looked startled to see us all there.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. Why are you guys up at this hour? Oh, right," she blushed lightly. "You don't sleep, do you?"

"Never."

Alice smiled, rather nervous. "I'm still getting used to this. Hey, is it ok if I use the kitchen?"

"It was built for you," answered my brother. "Of course you can use it, whenever you want. But if you want something, just tell us and we'll prepare it for you."

"I thought you didn't eat. He told me you don't."

"No, but do you doubt my skills as a chef?" Felix said with a big smile. "I assure you I'm one hell of a cook."

She giggled. "We shall see. But I can manage, really, don't worry about me. I'll be fine."

Alice went into the kitchen and began raiding the cupboards. Demetri turned to the rest of us and mouthed, 'Do humans usually eat at 4 in the morning?' Nobody was sure, but Alice sure seemed quite determined as she took out a lot of ingredients and started mixing and blending. We went to the kitchen, too, to keep her company and watch her to inform Aro. A warm, sweet scent soon filled the room.

"Smells nice," said Felix. What are you cooking?"

"Pancakes."

Evidently unable to hold his question, Demetri asked Alice directly whether humans usually ate at 4 am. She laughed, the first time I'd ever heard her laugh.

"No. I… I just had this craving all of a sudden… you know…" By the boys' faces it was clear they didn't. "Babies, they do that to you. They make you want to eat weird things at weird times."

She sat down with her huge plate of pancakes, looking rather pleased with herself. Now that I could see her properly, I noticed she had a bruise on her right cheekbone, and there were four long scratches going from her jaw down her neck, disappearing under the robe, probably extending to her chest. There was a tiny scab at the corner of her lips. Who knew what other injuries Aro's passion had inflicted on her. She ate for a while and then looked at us. "Could I ask you guys something?"

"Yes, of course."

"How did I get here? I mean, how did he find me, where, when? Why did he pick me? What's the story?"

We exchanged looks, not knowing if this information was ours to share. The story of Aro's obsession and falling in love with Alice was turbulent and dark, perhaps he didn't want her to know.

She saw our doubt and insisted. "For God's sake, I have the right to know!"

We told her, we told her everything. From the day when Aro spotted her outside school, and how she captured his attention right away. We told her about the vigilance he'd kept over her, and how we had taken turns spying. How he had fought to seduce her, and how frustrated he had been every time he refused. How much the baby meant to him, and how excited he was about it. The only thing we didn't tell her about was the girls, the endless procession of girls that came and went before her. That was none of her business; she had asked for hers and Aro's story and she would get only that. The rest was too difficult and painful to deal with.

Alice was silent for a long time. Then she ran her hand through her hair. She sighed, playing with the fork.

"Thank you," she said simply, and went back upstairs to sleep.

. . . . . . .

Early next morning she was back in the kitchen, and this time Aro came to see her.

"My darling, you're awake! Did you sleep well? How's our baby?" He kissed the top of her head. The look of disgust and hatred on Alice's face was so powerful I wondered how he could insist on keeping her when all he inspired her was revulsion.

"I'm fine. I'm feeling a little better."

"Good, good." Aro looked extremely pleased with her and with himself. Then he turned to Alec and me, and I noticed he had an envelope in his hand. He waved it enthusiastically. "I just got a letter from Carlisle, and he says that his family are planning to move soon. Apparently they've done the North America tour already, and can't be seen there in a while, so they're considering coming here. They will wait until Carlisle's children finish school, yet again," Aro laughed here, "but they want to buy land and build something there. Hm… I'll have someone find an adequate piece of land for them. The Cullens are our friends, we don't want them to have something simple or uncomfortable. The land will be my gift for them, as a sign of friendship. This will be only the beginning."

Alice looked utterly confused, and when Aro noticed he began the most excited explanation about the Cullens and how their coming would be a perfect opportunity to convince some of them to join. Behind his back I saw a lot of eye-rolling –no one really wanted to see the Cullens around. Alice nodded while he talked, but I could say she didn't understand much. She was a smart girl, but it would take her a long time to process the finer threads of our world.

Aro took her to the gardens, which she hadn't fully seen yet, to continue his explanation about the Cullens and their potential. Meanwhile, the guard sat together to complain and scheme. No one, absolutely no one wanted anything to do with the Cullens. They were the most disliked coven in our household and also the most dangerous if not handled appropriately. Their coming here was a problem as inevitable as perilous. The Cullens would bring trouble, we knew. Soon. Very soon.


	43. On growing up

**On growing up**

"Don't you dare to speak to me like that! Haven't I given you everything, done everything for you?"

"What, what have you given me? A beating every night? That's what you give me. And what have you done, besides raping and humiliating me? It's you who has no right to reproach anything!"

"Shut up, Alice, or-"

"Or what? You'll beat me? You already do that. Kill me? I'd prefer that a thousand times. I choose death over you any time."

They hadn't closed the door, too caught in their anger. For almost half an hour now, I had been listening to them having one of their classical fights. It was the third one that week. The smallest detail would make them start arguing, and once they began they could go on for hours. This time the spark had been Alice's refusal to get involved in the process of preparing everything for the child: she cared nothing about the nursery, or the names, or the details of the baby's nature and position within our world. Even the daily check-up with the doctor was a bore to her. Aro was now too upset to let it pass, and so he had confronted her. They were now exchanging all sorts of recriminations, for the entire castle to hear.

A sharp sound. He must have hit her, it always happened when they fought. At least now that she had the tiniest bump in her stomach Aro was finally aware of her pregnancy, and was handling her more carefully. Sure, that didn't mean they wouldn't shout horrible things at each other, but now we didn't have to worry about Aro accidentally killing her, or causing her to lose the child.

The fight went on. "Hit me all you want!" she screamed. "I don't care about you do with the nursery, put sparkling unicorns if you want, set it on fire for all I care."

"It's your child, Alice! How can you not care?"

"This brat isn't mine, it's yours. If I ever get involved in anything that has to do with this kid, it will be to kill it with my bare hands."

Another blow, more insults. Eventually, Aro slammed the door and came downstairs, furious.

"She cares nothing about our child, the whore! Doesn't she realize that she's passing all that hatred to it? The child can feel her attitude, and it will be affected. I tell you, Jane, if my child has any problem of any kind because of this, that idiot girl will wish she'd never been born." He growled in angry frustration. "I'm going out. I can't stand her anymore. Be around just in case she needs anything, ok? Good girl. See you later."

He left, while I realized that despite supposedly being so angry at Alice he cared about her enough to leave me behind as her personal maid. When early evening fell and there were still no signs of Aro, or Alice (she had stayed in her room all day), I decided to go and check on her. As I approached I heard voices through the half-opened door: Chelsea and Renata were there with her. I got closer, and caught their words.

"The problem here, Alice," Renata was saying, "is that you only know the basic technicalities of the thing. You know what goes where, but not how or when."

Oh. They were talking about _that._ The talk Alice had been promised to survive intimacy with Aro. I hesitated. I wanted to listen, for I had never been given such education, but I knew it wouldn't be well seen if I joined. Instead I settled for standing outside and eavesdropping as much as I could.

Whatever Renata and Chelsea had been saying had Alice scandalized. "But I can't do that! I can't!" she exclaimed. "I'm not ready, I don't think I could ever be like that."

"You know, Alice, there does come a moment in life when you have to close your eyes and say a prayer. Yours has arrived."

"No! Besides, I wouldn't know exactly what to do, he's so complicated."

"That's not true," said Chelsea. "Aro might seem a very complex man, but in the bedroom all men are the same. They are very primitive. They want to think that they are demanding and special, but they all want the same thing, and they don't care what happens as long as they get it. Your job is to provide it, to give it to him and make him think he's the one claiming it. You have to take the control and make him believe he still has the power."

Alice sighed. "I can't just let him touch me. I can't give myself to him just like that. I cannot surrender."

Renata intervened. "But you cannot win. Stop fighting him, it won't get you anywhere. "

"But-"

"How many times have you fought him?"

"Every time."

"And how many times have you succeeded?"

Silence. Of course.

Renata then continued. "Don't see it as surrender. It's common sense and survival. Listen, Alice, here we all strive to keep the Trio happy. Aro is the most difficult, because sometimes not even he knows what he wants. But little by little we have all found a way to make him happy, a sure one. For example, Jane pleases him by agreeing with everything he says, Alec pleases him by giving counsel, Heidi by bringing our sustain. I do by offering protection and security. We all do something, he has something for everyone. And if your way to keep him happy happens to be in bed… well, so be it. Close your eyes. Pretend it's someone else. Create your dream guy and draw him in your head. Imagine he's the one enjoying you, and you will enjoy it, too. If you do it right Aro will never notice." There was a pause as Renata weighed her words. "Alice, you were born a woman, and therefore you have a duty. Just… do it. You have no choice, anyway."

"But then he'll think I like it." Alice still sounded stubborn and frustrated.

"Honey, he knows perfectly well how much you hate it. Do you think he cares?"

Chelsea chimed in. "Actually, it makes it better for him. To know that you don't want it, that you don't want him, and still you have to do it, it makes him feel more powerful. You fight him in order not to give him any pleasure, when in fact that struggling pleases him the most. You have no idea what a turn-on it can be for men when they subject a woman to their will against hers. If you just let him have you, you'll spoil his fun and he might lose interest in you, and leave you alone."

"Now," said Renata. "Aro does have his particularities. He's rather whimsical, and God knows you made him wait a long, long time. Has he made you do weird stuff? Let's say, special requirements?"

"Oh, um… No, none of that, he's very… typical. He doesn't even-" she stopped herself.

Chelsea giggled. "What? Come on, you can trust us."

"He… he doesn't change position… i-it's always with him on top and…" she couldn't go on. Though I couldn't see her, I was able to picture the exact shade of scarlet her face had in that moment.

There was a pause, and then Chelsea spoke again. "Alice, I'm going to ask you something that might feel private, but that is important: have you ever had an... God, how to say this without making you faint? Um… have you ever reached a… a climax?"

It took Alice five whole seconds to understand Renata. To my utter shame, it took me just as long.

"I… I… no, I haven't, I, uh, no, I mean, I…"

Now both Renata and Chelsea laughed. "Don't be embarrassed! You'll get used to talking about these things. Well, honey, in that case you have a special homework: try to get there. On your own. Take some time for yourself, to truly understand what is going on. Know yourself, Alice, know your body, know who you are and what you have. Know what you like and what you don't, what you prefer, what you dream of, what your fantasies are. If you don't know how to please yourself, how can anyone else? You're very pretty, but though that alone can prove quite useful, you need to have many more resources, and the best ones come from within your own body and mind."

"Later," Chelsea told her, "I'll teach you techniques. You know, special stuff to make him happy. Men are a very basic lot, but women can't afford to be simple."

"Later? Why not now?"

"Because you're a baby! You need to know things, but I won't corrupt you more than necessary. Don't worry, little one, you won't wait for too long. I can see you're a quick learner."

They continued talking, but I couldn't stay anymore. I ran, for I feared they might see me. I didn't know what to make of what I'd just heard: it had been interesting, yes, and I'd learned a lot, but when would I use all that information. It was useful to Alice because she had a husband to please, a husband who visited her every night, but I was just a girl nobody wanted and nobody cared about. Chelsea and Renata could give advice because they had experience, they'd met men and they'd had some flings here and there, but what did I have? I felt very stupid and childish. No one had ever been truly interested in me, and even after centuries I was still the only virgin girl in the castle. I went downstairs until I saw the girls leave, and then returned, to get Alice ready, and pretended everything was fine. How much I hated her, not even I could ever explain.

. . . .

_Alice's POV_

The worst part always was hearing his footsteps approach. After what had happened that morning I worried about how he would treat me; he was the kind of man to hold grudges over everything. When the door opened and he stood in front of me, however, he spoke as if we'd never fought.

"Hello, my love. You look beautiful tonight. How are you? How's our baby."

"Fine. Everything is fine."

"Good." He took me by the waist and pulled me to him. "I've seen that you visit the library I gave you quite often. Do you like it, then?"

I hated to admit it, but I loved the library. "I do like it. Thank you."

"I'm so glad. I wanted you to have something you love so much. What have you been reading?"

"There are a few books on law and psychology, I'd never read anything on those subjects before. It's interesting."

There was something about human rights there, and a chapter on slavery. In Aro's smile I saw that he knew which books I had read, and the topics they covered.

"Well, well, well, my little Alice has been learning stuff. Those books are very advanced for your age, you know."

"What, will you take them away to limit what I can and cannot know?"

He laughed. "Of course not! You're intelligent and cultured, and that's why I love you. Read anything you like. It makes no difference to me if you know your rights. The one thing that would be a problem is how to consider you: remember I bought you, and that makes you my property just as much as my cars, my jewels, or my houses. Do objects have any right to anything? Oh, sugar, I still get to do whatever I want with you. With you and _to_ you…"

He held me tightly, firmly, sure of his control, hands traveling up and down my back. He nuzzled his face against my hair and continued talking.

"So… I hear that the girls talked to you today. Care to show me what you learned?" he squeezed me lightly.

I fought back nausea to answer. "They didn't teach me much, just how to look at you without throwing up."

He chuckled. "I hope you keep that one in mind." He began to kiss me, and his hands sneaked under my clothes. I tried not to shiver though the coldness of his body was penetrating, but I couldn't help it. His hands were ice, and he touched me as he pleased.

Little by little I was getting to know him, and I could tell that he particularly wanted me that night. Something changed in his eyes, and the tension in his muscles increased, as if he held himself back. He ran his hands all over my body, slowly, lustily, and then whispered in a choked voice,

"Your body is changing… must be the pregnancy… but you look so good, so good. You're so lucky to be with someone who knows what you're worth and can treat you the way you deserve."

He caressed me, possessive and demanding as always. He placed a hand on my now round stomach, to feel how his child was doing. The doctor had said everything was perfect, but for Aro it was never enough caution. Satisfied, he returned to touching and undressing me. He laid me on the bed, and climbed on top. Instinctively, I raised my hands to push him away. He caught my wrists and pushed my arms to both sides of my head, then talked quietly and slowly in my ear.

"I know they advised you not to fight me. If you know what's good for you, listen to them. There's no way you'll ever be able to overpower me."

He kept me pinned down for a while, and then released me. Trying my best to follow the girls' advice, I grabbed a handful of the sheets to keep my hands from pushing him or resisting him in any way, and bit into a corner of the fabric to keep me from screaming. He did his thing, and though I did try to control myself he still had to hold my hips and legs down a couple of times. My body was tense, very tense, and the whole episode ended up being more unpleasant than the others, for keeping quiet and unmoving made me focus more on what he was doing to me. He was satisfied, however, and said he was proud of me for finally learning my place.

"You're here for me, to come when I call you, to do my bidding, to please me. If you're good to me I'll be good to you. See how I didn't have to beat you tonight? We can make it work, my love, you, me, and our baby. We'll be very happy."

He kissed me on the forehead, and left. Jane came to help me, but each time I was resisting more and more, and would soon be able to do everything myself. After I'd bathed thoroughly she brushed my hair and also lectured me on being a good wife to Aro. While she talked everything piled in my head: the fight early in the day, everything that Chelsea and Renata had told me, the way Aro had used me that night, the child I carried inside me as a consequence of his attack, and how everybody thought it was _my_ responsibility to make _him_ happy. I ended up asking Jane to leave; I needed peace. I got in bed, trying (and failing) to evade all sense of reality, and cried myself to sleep.


	44. Discoveries

**Discoveries**

_Alice's POV_

Much as I hated to admit it, obliging to some of Aro's rules and wishes proved to be useful. He was more peaceful, and seemed to trust me more. Of course, that didn't mean we didn't fight, and he would still beat me when he got angry, but there was some improvement in our relationship. Therefore, I kept looking for chances to polish my image before him and his people. That night proved to be very useful to my purposes. The castle was buzzing with activity: Aro would be holding a meeting that night, with his Main Council and a few special guests. Everything had to be perfect, and I slowly made my way into the supervision of all the arrangements.

I remembered that conversation with the girls some days ago, and all the advice they had given me. _Please him, and he'll leave you alone. Please him, and he'll be kind to you._ Well, I could please him without having to lower and humiliate myself in his private enjoyments. My father used to have large business meetings at home. I would host those meetings with my mother, and it was my job to provide whisky, coffee, and cigars for the men who came. Perhaps I could do something like that for Aro's meeting that night, and he would treat me better.

When I shared the idea, everyone loved it. Apparently, in all the years they had served Aro and attended his meetings, no one had thought of something similar. I told Chelsea (with whom I was forming an ever-growing friendship), and she was delighted.

"Oh, it would be so lovely if we could give them liquor! I would love to see the whole lot drunk. What a pity. But there_ is_ something we could do…"

She told me about the blood they kept refrigerated for later use, and taught me to heat it properly. Contrary to what anyone would think, I wasn't repulsed by the ingest of blood in that place. Perhaps it was because I had better things to be worried about. To me, the preparation of the jars of blood, the cups, everything, felt just like cooking a regular meal, which I had always loved.

When the guests arrived and the meeting started, I felt like I was the little girl back home. Everything flowed effortlessly, and it pleased me to see that I was still a good hostess. I had prepared a tray with the jar of blood and a few cups, and I tried to go into the room. I didn't even know if I was allowed to be present in the meeting, but when Aro saw me he waved me in.

As I walked around, pouring blood and handing the cups, I listened to the topics they were discussing: "Newborn outbreak…" "Transformation could now be painless…" "Coven revolt…" I didn't understand a word about it; could have been a whole new world and language for all I knew. Aro, however, was perfectly in control, declaring extinction for the newborns, further research about the transformation, and "just kill whoever's being too loud" for the revolts. I could only hope that the newborns that would be eliminated weren't the babies I kept picturing in my mind. But every second I was less ignorant, and after the first hour the ideas flowing around began making sense.

The meeting continued for hours, and soon I was making second and third rounds. The men in the room took good care of not even looking at me when I filled their cups, and I realized how much power Aro had over them. He seemed pleased to have me there, though, even proud. The second or third time I went to him he took my hand, kissed it, and looked at me adoringly. He placed a hand on my stomach, and then patted my cheek. Anyone would have believed he loved me more than anything else, but the arm whose hand he had just kissed was covered in bruises from the beating he'd given me the night before. I knew better.

After a while, I felt someone's eyes on me as I poured the glasses of blood. Over the weeks I had grown used to Aro constantly observing me, and given how pleased he was tonight I paid little importance. But the sensation was penetrating, and I somehow knew it wasn't him. I looked up, too uncomfortable now, and met Caius' stare. He was observing me carefully, from head to toe. When I reached him and he handed me his cup to be refilled, it was as if nothing had happened; he barely acknowledged me and had only a brief nod when I set the cup in front of him again.

Someone else was watching me, too, but those intentions were perfectly clear. Jane was furious at me for having offered to help at the meeting. It angered her that she could not do it herself because she had been called to attend the actual session, for she was part of the Main Council. I knew she would have traded all those privileges for the chance to serve Aro in this more personal way. She envied me the rights I had as a wife. Did she really think I hadn't noticed the way she looked at Aro? Did she really think she could fool me? I was young, but not stupid, and I had a woman's instincts. There was much more to Jane than she was really letting people see.

The meeting ended well after four am, and only because the guests had to return home before sunlight caught them. It seemed to me that the night had been a success, judging by the relief in many of the faces. Aro looked at me with utter devotion, and everyone else looked happy, too. The best part was that I wasn't fighting with pregnancy symptoms as much as before, so there was no dizziness or nausea to ruin my moment.

After cleaning up I headed upstairs. My eyes were closing and I could barely stand on my own, but I heard Aro right behind me. _Jeez, do I have to stay awake for him? Let it be quick. _But when we were in the bedroom instead of grabbing me and taking me as usual, he took my hands and kissed them like he'd done downstairs.

"I'm so proud of you, Alice," he said while stroking my face. "You're everything I dreamed of, and more. Rest now, my love, you must be exhausted. I'll see you tomorrow."

He kissed me on the forehead and, just like that, he left. It was the first night since the wedding that he didn't touch me.

_Alec's POV_

Alice was sent to sleep while most of the guard gathered in one of the living rooms to discuss the agreements of the meeting. Jane was silent, and I didn't have to ask the reason of her bad mood; after all Alice had just crowned herself as the perfect wife and hostess. But little by little she incorporated into the group, and for once she didn't have to murder half a hundred people to feel calmer.

There was a lot of talking, arguing, and finally chatting. Everything had gone well, after all; what originally seemed a difficult meeting had been softened by Alice's presence. We went over some of the agreements and re planned our next steps considering the orders Aro had given; suffocating the revolts in the North wouldn't be easy or pleasant at all. Some groups were getting ready to leave as soon as possible to get the work done. Suddenly we heard a sound, long and high. Paying attention we realized it was cries we were hearing. We rushed towards the source of the sound, which seemed to be Aro's wing of the castle. The cries were painful and desperate, and as we got closer we distinguished some words of begging mixed in the sobs.

It was Alice. The door of her room was half-open. Contrary to what we'd thought she was completely alone: screaming in her dreams. Jane rushed to wake her up (for us guys it was forbidden to touch her), and it took a while for Alice to react to my sister's shaking and calling. When she opened her eyes there was still terror in them.

Jane had never been a primary source of comfort, and well aware of that she handed the control of Alice to Renata, who immediately took the girl in her arms and began to soothe her.

"It's ok, baby girl, it's ok. We're here with you."

"I-I'm sorry," Alice mumbled. "It was just a bad dream."

Felix, who had come with us in case she was actually being attacked and a fight was necessary, tried to lighten up the situation. "Must've been a pretty bad dream, to take that sort of screaming. We thought you were getting murdered up here."

"Kinda… Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Really. It was just a dream."

Almost everyone left the room, except for Chelsea, my sister, and me. Alice still looked scared, so Chelsea tried to make her talk so that she would relax.

"What was it? That was some tough screaming."

"I was… remembering." Alice sighed. She made a face of discomfort, then ran a hand over her stomach. "It's a little restless."

"Can you feel it already?" asked Chelsea, surprised. Alice's pregnancy was more than evident now that she was past the first trimester, but I didn't know when a woman was able to feel her baby's movement. Apparently now Alice was.

Alice nodded. "I know it's too early, but I feel it. It's kicking a little." She patted the bump. "I wish it would stop."

"May I, um…" Chelsea was shy and hesitant. "May I feel it?" she extended her hand tentatively.

Alice smiled. "Of course. Go ahead."

Chelsea placed her hand gently on Alice's stomach. She must have felt something, because suddenly she beamed. It drew my attention that there was much more light in Chelsea's eyes than in Alice's. Alice carried the curve of her belly like some burden, like a nuisance blocking her way, while Chelsea looked like a little girl on Christmas morning. Despite Alice's own claims, I'd never actually believed that she hated her child (which mother could ever hate her own child?), but after seeing her in that moment, and comparing her to Chelsea, I had no doubt about it. It was sad and terrifying.

Jane, who was just too bored with the whole episode, suggested we left Alice in peace so that she could rest. I wasn't too sure about leaving her alone, for she still looked scared and troubled by her nightmare, but, as my sister reminded me in a quick whisper unintelligible for Alice, 'she's going to have bad dreams, with or without us, and her life will worse when she wakes up, anyway'. We left, now fully closing the door: nothing we did would help her, in any case. She lived her hell within herself, in the nightmares inside her mind and in the child inside her womb; against that there was no remedy.

We went to the garden, where the sun was already shining over the trees. It didn't take us long to realize we were in the spot directly below Alice's room. The cries and the begging echoed through the windows.


	45. Threats

**Hello, y'all! I know it's been an awful lot of time since I last updated, and I do apologize. There have been a lot of things going on lately, and well, there just wasn't enough time. But here's the chapter, and I hope it won't take me too long to post a new one. Much love! XOXO**

**Threats**

While Alice walked around with her big belly and a crown on her head there was important stuff to do. We were dealing with two newborn outbreaks and one revolt, all at the same time. Though it wasn't unusual to have this kind of trouble it certainly was to have it all at once. After the meeting where precious little Alice had made her debut as hostess a few squads had left with various destinations: two were set to control the outbreaks in Sydney and Nebraska, and yet another had been sent to look into a clan revolt in Russia.

My brother was in charge of supervising the outbreaks and I had to deal with the revolt. There would be some people brought to Volterra for further questioning, so I had to make all the preparations. Even before the prisoners arrived I had the dungeons ready –they were beautiful, our dungeons, fortified and adapted to provide the appropriate sufferings for seemingly indestructible creatures like us. It would be a wonderful lesson for whoever thought they could defy us without facing consequences.

When they arrived and I saw them chained in the dungeons, I couldn't help but feel ecstatic. It had been a long time since I'd last had a plaything to use to my heart's content. There were five of them, three men and two women, and I could tell there was a couple among them, which would give me even more ways of torment –nothing hurts more than seeing your beloved suffer. I began slowly, taking my time to savour the almost-forgotten pleasure of martyrizing someone, and proceeded to bring to life all my old tricks. To give them credit, they were quite strong and they took a lot of work to break and have pleading, but in the end it all worked out. When there was only one left I went a little slower, and examined the man before me.

He had been the leader, for what I could understand from the others' testimonies, and so I'd left him for last, so he could see his friends die for the cause he had begun. He was suffering greatly, that much was clear, but still he could not bring himself to break down. He was defiant, stubborn, and even chained and writhing on the floor he had the nerve to keep arguing with me.

"You're going to kill me," he said, when my private session with him had lasted well over four hours, "but that is not enough. We're but one side of the many groups that want your precious Master dead, and our deaths will do nothing but feed their anger. Soon, there will be more uprisings than you could count, and they will crush you all. Not even someone as satanic, sadistic, and absolutely revolting like you will be able to do anything about it."

I knew better than to give him the pleasure of seeing me angry. What could he do now, when all he had left was his death? I stood before him, and as I tortured him further I spoke.

"Bring them. Make them stand, so I can see them better. Not one will be left after what I have in store. What do we care if a hundred rise, or a thousand, or a million? They will all perish in the cruellest of ways, they will wish they had never been born. Just like you do right now. Keep them coming, because they will keep falling."

With a final smile, I set him on fire.

_Alice's POV_

All of a sudden I heard screams coming from the underground.

"What is going on?" I asked the guard.

"Some people brought for questioning."

"Questioning?"

"Yes, Alice. They're the survivors of the clan that tried to rise against us, and now they're getting what they deserve. Or actually… well, they're getting Jane, and I don't think _anyone_ deserves that…" he shuddered.

The fact that a big grown man could be intimidated by Jane was so absurd and terrifying I had to laugh. He gave me an odd look as I walked away. The echo of the screams faded gradually and soon there was peace again. I kept walking, trying to find a spot to be quietly on my own, until I came across a little balcony overlooking the garden. I sat by the window and looked at my stomach. I felt all heavy, and fat, and tired, and disgusting. I was almost six months pregnant by now, and I had the appearance of some huge bloated cow. The kid had been kicking all day and I hadn't been able to make it calm down; I was growing tired of the endless little blows. To make it worse as I sat down I remembered that, somewhere in my old life, tonight was Halloween. My school always threw a big party that night, and my friends and I loved to dress up for it; we even won a couple of contests. I had been particularly excited about this year's celebration, because I was fourteen now and therefore a big girl with more freedom and permission to do more things than the year before. Talk about freedom…

New kicks brought me back to reality, and I patted my stomach to make the child calm down. Somewhere downstairs, I could hear a door opening. Voices rose: Aro and Jane, walking and chatting as they came from the dungeons. Jane said something that made him laugh. They walked down the hall and soon they were in the garden, right under my window. He kissed Jane's forehead and they both parted ways. Poor Jane, I don't think Aro ever noticed the way her eyes were fixed on him long after he'd left.

The child kicked again. This was Aro's child, the child of a man who was calmly laughing after torturing people for hours and hours. Inside me someone with Aro's blood was growing. It would soon be born, and then Aro would raise it. What would it become, under his teachings? What would Aro make it believe was right and wrong, how would he educate it? What if it was a boy, and he became just as violent and sick as his father? Even worse, what if it was a girl? The possibilities of what I was about to bring into the world terrified me.

A figure appeared reflected on the glass of the window. Marcus. He came towards me and sat across me. He looked at me with his all-knowing eyes and smiled understandingly.

"What is it, Alice?"

He knew me well, though we'd only known each other for four months. "Nothing. I was just thinking… I'm just worried that Aro will turn this child into something as cruel and awful as he is. I don't want my child to grow under his influence."

He smiled. "Why, Alice. You are concerned about your baby."

"It… it's not that. I wouldn't be able to live knowing I brought into the world someone as monstrous as Aro. And it will be Aro who will raise this child, and of course it will be shaped after him. With his blood in its veins and his teachings in its head, who knows what it will become?"

"Well, sweetling, that's when you come in. You're its mother. You have the responsibility and privilege to stop that influence, to educate your baby and make sure it doesn't turn out like your husband. You're a good girl, Alice, and I know that deep down you're also a good mother. You will love your child, and you will protect it."

I didn't say anything in order not to contradict him; Marcus had always been kind to me and I didn't want to be rude. Still, I knew that he was wrong: I could never love the creature growing in my womb. The nausea I felt in the morning reminded me of the nausea I felt when Aro touched me, the little kicks were echoes of all the times Aro had beaten me. I couldn't love the child of the man who had tortured me so much, and the fact that it was my child too only made it worse. This child tied me to the one person I hated most in the entire world, the man who had destroyed my life.

Or maybe… not. There could be a way out. A plan quickly took shape inside my mind. I went to Aro's study. If Aro really did love the child as much as Jane assured me he did, then he could very well be interested in a little bargain. I gathered my courage and knocked on his door.

"Come in, my love."

I obeyed, and went inside the study I had only visited once since moving to the castle. I had to admit it was a beautiful place: space, with shelf after shelf of books. The paintings that hang on the walls (fine, expensive originals museums would kill for) were really beautiful, for if there was anything good about Aro it was that he had excellent taste. There were two chairs in front of the mahogany desk, and behind it, sitting on a big, leather chair, was _he._

"So, what do you need?" he asked as I sat down heavily. "Are you ok? How's the baby?"

"Fine, I'm –we're fine. I… Aro, I've been thinking, and I have a proposition for you."

"Really? What is it?"

"Well…" I took a deep breath. "You love this child that I'm carrying. You have wanted it for years."

"Yes, Alice, I have wanted that child for centuries. It is precious to me." He already had that weird analysing look on his face, trying to figure out what I was up to.

"I know. That is what I want to offer you. As soon as the baby is born, I'll give it to you. I'll give up all my rights over it, it will be yours, only yours, to raise and protect as you see fit. I will not interfere at all. It will be your child, yours alone. As soon as your child is born I will leave and you will never see me again."

"So what is exactly the offer?"

"My surrendering your child to you… in exchange for my freedom. We can both have what we want the most! Aro, you don't really love me, you married me because of the child, but you don't actually want me around. Let me go, get rid of me forever, and keep your child all to yourself." I had leaned forward, full of excitement and desperate need to make him understand.

He spoke slowly. "So if I divorce you, let you leave this castle, and never look for you again, you will give me my child and you will never interfere?"

"Yes, Aro, that's it. I will never stand between you and your child, ever. But please, please, please let me go. Aro, please."

He stood up and walked toward me. I felt the need to stand, too, and meet him. He looked me over, touched my stomach and walked around me, always examining me, until he was right behind. He put his hands on my shoulders, moved a lock of hair and whispered quietly in my ear,

"If you ever try to leave me, I'll kill you."

I gasped, surprised and scared at the same time. I didn't expect him to react like that, I'd actually thought I had a hope for my plan. The fingers touching me became claws.

"You are mine, do you hear me? Mine. I found you, I married you, I own you. You are an awful mother, how can you even think of abandoning your child? Leave it alone, defenceless? Unprotected?" His words were now growls, and the fingers on my shoulders would surely leave bruises. He turned me around brusquely and shook me. "You will never leave this place, you hear me? You're my wife and you belong to me. You're the mother of my child and you will live up to that role. I won't hear any more talk about leaving, ever again, understood?"

His hands went up from my shoulders and settled around my neck. His thumb traced the vein that pulsed right over my throat, and then he squeezed my neck softly. _He can break it if he wants to_, I thought. _He can choke me if he wants to and no one would stop him_. But instead he leaned forward, and his lips ghosted over mine, not quite kissing me but still close enough for me to feel his breath.

"Go. Go now before I change my mind and hurt you. Renata wanted help to choose the colour for our child's bedroom walls, make yourself useful there. Oh, and be ready tonight. I'll be visiting you."

"But the doctor said that until the child is born we couldn't-"

"I know what he said. As if I cared. Get ready, Alice, and you'd better please me tonight –next time you come up with something like this I won't be as forgiving."

He waved his hand, signalling me to go. I left as quickly as I could, trying to run in the best way my huge stomach allowed me, before tears could catch up.


	46. Preparations

**I know, I know, it's been an obscenely long amount of time. I'm so sorry. But things have very complicated these weeks. I hope you understand. Anyway, here's the chapter, and if all goes well I'll have another one ready in a couple of weeks. Enjoy!**

**Preparations**

_Jane's POV_

There was a strange sort of peace in the castle, one that we hadn't known in a while. We had dealt with the revolts and our power was stronger than ever. No one doubted the authority of the Volturi after seeing how easily enemies were defeated, no one would question us again. Aro had his Alice a bit more tamed now, so he was pleasant and sane; no more rage or sudden wraith attacks; for that we were all thankful. Everyone's attention could now focus on the baby's arrival, which, judging by the size of Alice's belly, could be any moment now.

As we struggled to have everything ready on time, we found ourselves slightly overpowered in the bureaucratic area. There was a lot of work to do, simple, organizational stuff that would serve the dynamics of our operations as a government. Paperwork, agenda, the part of the work that sometimes made us look like some common office, but that helped us stay firmly in place. Tedious as it was, it represented an important part of our structure. But none of the vampires in the household wanted to do the normal, mundane jobs. Everyone thought themselves too cool or important to sit at a desk and answer phones, or send e-mails, or buy presents for important coven leaders.

"Oh God, we need a secretary!" Marcus laughed one day, seeing the mess we'd surrounded ourselves with. "Let's hire one."

Aro wasn't too convinced; he'd seen too many years of complaints when trying to make people work. Even Alec and I had done everything in our power to escape such duties. "It will be the same thing. Which vampire will like to the dirty work?"

"I didn't mean 'let's hire a vampire secretary'. Of course no one would want the job. We need a normal one. A human."

And that's how we ended up with Gianna. A perfectly human girl who was hired with a contract and a formal salary. She would be in charge of dealing with the correspondence that we got from clans all over the world –invitations, announcements. She would also (to my great relief and the one reason I agreed to hiring her and even let her live in peace) be in charge of Alice. Of course, I would still be the one to care for her if Aro beat her or something like that, but the new official maid was Gianna. To be honest, the girl was good and efficient, and though she had been told what this was about and who we were, she hadn't made any weird questions or comments. Gianna was reliable and hard-working and served her purpose. That was enough.

This was just a taste of how bizarre life was nowadays. I had seen many stages of change, many eras within our lives, but there had never been humans wandering around the castle like they owned the place. There were only two now, but who knew if in a couple of months one of the Trio would decide he wanted another pet, and there would we be, all over again. There was simple an immense lack of dignity in the whole situation. One morning, while I was tidying a room I didn't want the common guard to touch, I saw Alice approach. For a moment I pitied her: she walked heavily, with evident effort. Her stomach was huge now, on the eighth month, and she looked exhausted. She sat on one of the sofas and stayed there quietly for a while. Finally she looked up.

"Jane?"

"Yes, Alice?"

"What does Aro want?" she asked, running a hand over her swollen belly.

I understood immediately what she meant. "You mean the baby? He really doesn't care. He's wanted this more than anything in his life, and as long as the baby is born healthy and strong he will be perfectly happy." That was true. It couldn't be more irrelevant to Aro whether he had a boy or a girl; it was a child of his own blood that he craved, and that was the only thing that mattered.

Alice, however, was unconvinced. "That's what all men say, and then you have them complaining over a daughter."

"No, Alice, trust me, he doesn't mind. He's tried for so long, and all he wants is a healthy baby that will give him pride."

That made her stop. She looked at me and I instantly regretted having opened my mouth. "Wait… what do you mean, 'he's tried'? What has he done?"

I paused. Could I tell her the whole story? It wasn't mine to tell. "There have been others" I said slowly. "Not quite like you, but there were other girls in his life. He never married them, of course, and only a handful ever came to live here with him. But not one ever gave him what he wanted."

_Marguerithe would have succeeded, but I killed her. Johanna too, if I hadn't drowned her. I killed so many of them…_ Alice looked like she still had questions, but in the end she didn't ask anything else.

Her bringing the matter up made me curious, though. "And you, Alice? What do you want?"

"I want a boy," she said firmly.

This was peculiar; as far as I knew all women wanted daughters, little girls to dress up and turn into princesses. Alice was the first one I'd ever heard to specifically want a son. I asked her why and she explained.

"A boy will be safe. If I have a girl she will always be under the danger of what happened to me happening to her. She'll forever be at risk, she'll be seen, observed, wanted. God knows Aro could sell her, like he bought me. I can't have that happen. That's why I want a boy. He'll be strong, able to fight for himself, and he'll never face what I have faced. I want a boy."

_Alice's POV_

That night Aro came to visit me. He'd finally understood that he couldn't take me again until after the birth, so his presence surprised me.

"Hi," he said. Seeing the contempt in my face he continued. "I came to see how you are feeling. The baby?"

"I'm fine. The baby is strong. It won't be much longer." _And thank God for that._

He smiled and approached the bed. Carefully, he lay beside me and placed a hand on my stomach. I did everything I could to tolerate his touch without showing how much I hated it; it pleased me to see that I was getting better at it every day. The child moved inside me and I saw Aro's eyes shine when he felt it.

"Who do you think it will look like?" he asked, caressing the enormous curve that was drowning me.

"I don't know. You, I guess."

There was a pause. I could tell that he was picturing it, a little child with his black hair, his elegant features. Pride burned fiercely in his eyes.

"Have you thought of any names?" he asked.

"No. Have you?"

"Well… perhaps Regina, if it's a girl, or Diana. If we have a boy, then maybe Lucas or Sebastian. What do you think?" He looked at me eagerly, wanting approval.

"Yeah. Whatever you say is fine." I couldn't care less.

While Aro's attention was occupied with my belly, I examined him. There he sat, this man who was my husband and the father of my child, and who I hated more than anyone else in the world. Lost in the happiness and expectations of his baby, one could have almost believed he was good. He was sincerely excited about his child, which was something I still couldn't quite understand. He seemed to have entirely forgotten how we had conceived the kid. A man capable of hurting so much, capable of enjoying pain and misery, who never hesitated to hurt someone if it benefited him, how could he be so enthusiastic with the idea of a baby? Yet he was: he had the nursery ready, toys and clothes by the millions, and invitations for a party ready to be thrown as soon as I gave birth. No one could doubt his sincerity.

The child kicked inside me, yet again. The gleam in Aro's eyes intensified. And I couldn't take it anymore. I asked him to leave, which surprisingly enough he did without getting angry, and when I was alone I swallowed two of the sleeping pills I had managed to get from my doctor. Then I cursed the thing inside me until I fell asleep.


	47. The New One

**The new one**

It was a lovely Thursday morning. November was finally settled, and so the air had chilled and the skies were an even, sunless grey. From the terrace I could see Alice, walking around in the garden. Suddenly she bent forward, and she let out a small growl. Renata and I looked at each other, alert now. And then, again, Alice cried as she put both arms around her belly. Immediately, we were at her side.

"Now, Alice?"

She nodded. All blood was drained from her face, and she seemed stuck somewhere between pain and terror. I was shamefully ignorant about baby deliveries, and began to panic. "What, now, do we take her to a hospital?"

Renata, the only one of the three who had remained calm and sane, gave me a killer look. "She wouldn't make it. I'll take her upstairs. You, go tell Aro, and then go get everything ready, just as I taught you, remember?"

I nodded and ran. Aro had already heard us, and when I gave him the confirmation he practically flew to the room we had prepared a few weeks ago for this moment. Renata had already placed Alice on the bed and was ordering a couple of people around to have everything ready. Aro stood to the side, as if afraid to get too close to Alice. He motioned for me to go with him, and when he had me close he held my hand tight, very tight. Meanwhile Renata was addressing Alice with urgent commands.

"Listen, Alice, this will take ten minutes at the most. I need you to be very brave and very strong, ok?" Alice just nodded.

Then Renata began instructing her on the birth itself: breathe, push, relax, and who knows what else. Alice obeyed. She didn't seem to be in much pain, if any at all, and so I hoped Renata was right about how fast this would go. I tried to look away as discreetly as I could. Births had never been my thing, least of all _this_ birth. If it hadn't been for Aro holding my hand, I'd have fled the scene long ago.

Fortunately it was as quick as Renata had predicted. With a final cry, Alice brought Aro's child into the world. She collapsed back onto the pillows while the sounds of the baby filled the room. A collective sigh was heard. _The baby is fine. It made it. It lives. Finally._

"Congratulations, sir," said Renata as she washed the tiny thing and wrapped it in a blanket. "It's a boy."

Outside the room, every single person who lived in the castle was waiting, and they celebrated the birth of Aro's son. He was now kissing Alice –her hands, her face, her hair, and whispering all sorts of thanks and declarations of love. It was then that Renata handed him the baby, and for a whole minute he was too stunned to say or do anything but to look at him. The wonder and joy in Aro's face was something that had never been seen before, and that would never be seen again. The boy, who up to that moment had been crying, calmed down when Aro touched his head with the softest of caresses. When he had finally regained some composure and the power of speech he turned back to Alice, and offered the child to her.

"Alice, Alice, look at him" he said softly. "Our son."

Alice looked at the baby, completely uninterested. After a glance, she turned her head to the other side.

"You can throw him out the window for all I care," she said simply.

Looks were exchanged, whispers were heard. Renata and I looked at each other, worried about a possible outburst of Aro while still holding the baby. But he was much too happy to be upset by her answer. Instead, he turned to me.

"Jane," he said, "look at my son."

Aro placed the baby in my arms. I took him, for I had no other choice, and did my best not to let him fall. He was something I never expected, a tiny thing, delicate and fragile. He was a perfect copy of both Aro and Alice –his dark hair, his smart expression, his regal air; her blue eyes, her red lips, her beating heart. I remembered babies from when I was human and I babysat, they were sweet-smelling little creatures. But this baby was different. He was sweeter, and softer, and much more charming. He had the best of both natures: a vampire's irresistible attractiveness and a human's warmth. It was hard to determine who he'd gotten the beauty from. Minutes old, and had already won the heart of every lady in the room. He was the most gorgeous child I had ever met. And I saw it. This boy was Aro's son, a little piece of him, the best piece of him. Maybe Aro would never love me, but this baby could, and in loving him I would be able to somehow love his father as well. Oh, he was so perfect!

"Well, hello there," was all I could manage from this sudden emotional breakdown.

The child looked at me with his intelligent little eyes, and he did it like nobody else had before, ever. When I tried to arrange his blanket so that it wouldn't cover his face, he grabbed my finger and held on to it. His skin was very warm, but he seemed unaffected by the coldness of mine. And that's how we stayed for a little while, looking at each other as he cuddled in my arms.

It was with all the pain in my heart that I returned him to Aro so that he could be presented to everyone else. Aro instructed Chelsea, Renata and me to stay with Alice, while the rest of the people were told to leave. When the door opened, my brother came in and hugged me quickly. I'd seldom needed him more than at that moment. Then he left again, to follow the royal court that accompanied Aro. I hated being left behind, but at least my brother would be there to watch and tell me everything.

Once again it was us girls left. Together the three of us helped Alice and cleaned up. The girl was in extraordinary shape for someone who had just given birth, and even appeared to be somewhat relieved now that her pregnancy was over. The atmosphere in the room became quiet and even peaceful, but Chelsea must have noticed something in Renata's face, for she smiled and said,

"You were great, you know. No one could have done it better."

Renata laughed, and she released months of stress with that. "Christ, I was terrified! I mean, I've helped hundreds of women and babies, but this one was, you know, Aro's. You can't mess up something like that! What if something bad had happened?" she cringed in horror. "No, no, no. Thank God everything went well. How are you feeling, Alice?"

"Fine, I think," she said. "I'm tired, though… I would like to clean up, I'm such a disaster…"

"Oh, yes, of course. Can you walk? No, no, better not push it. We'll take you wherever you want."

Renata herself helped Alice, and I followed them. Eventually, Chelsea asked the question that seemed to have been burning her for the past minutes.

"Alice, wouldn't you like to see your baby? You haven't even held him yet! I don't think you got a good look at him, did you? And he's so gorgeous. Really, you should see him."

Alice sighed. "He's no son of mine. He's Aro's. Let him do whatever he wants with the kid, I want no part in it. My job here is done, and I don't want to be a part of anything else that has to do with that child." There was a pause, and then she added, "I'm glad it's a boy, though. He will be safe. He will never be in danger of going through all that I have. I can only hope Aro doesn't turn him into another monster like himself."

I looked at her with all the hatred I could master. My own arms ached for the baby, remembering how he had felt in them a few moments ago. He had seemed to like it…to like me. And here she was, this little girl, this little _bitch_, throwing away the most exquisite gift life could have ever given her. She had everything a woman could possibly want, and she had the nerve to reject it and complain, the whiny little idiot. She noticed my stare and looked away, somewhat intimidated; I gathered what little satisfaction that could give me.

Aro returned soon, because the baby was hungry and he wanted Alice to feed him. A brief dispute began between them because Alice wouldn't agree to even take the baby in her arms. Chelsea, Renata and I left just in time, before it got ugly. I went to my brother for comfort, but found that I didn't know what I needed to be comforted for. Was I jealous? Well, yes, but hadn't I already begun to learn how to deal with that? Was I angry? Not really, except for that moment with Alice. I realized I was hurt. But it was a different kind of hurt, pain that I had never felt before. It wasn't until Alec pointed it out that I understood that I was hurting for the baby, the little boy who had just come into this world today, and had already found it pretty messed. His mother hated him, and his father was the most complicated man I had ever met. He was a half-and-half, one of those who would never fit anywhere, who had bits from two worlds but could never call one of them his own. Of course, his position and lineage would be of immense help, but I knew that no matter what there would come the moment when he would feel out of place.

It also hurt me that he wasn't mine, that someone else was taking the credit for carrying and birthing Aro's child, and someone who didn't even value it. During decades I had tried my hardest to stop this very thing from happening, and now that it was all here I couldn't find the strength to be angry because I was starting to love that boy more than I'd ever loved anyone else in the world. I never knew these feelings were even possible, and now that they'd gotten me they were directed at someone who would never belong to me. Forever out of reach. And it looked like the little one needed much more love and attention than what he was going to get.

Realizing all this made me decide something new. I would fight back. I would fight for that child who didn't deserve to be hated simply for existing. I had been hated like that, and no one should ever know the feeling. The baby could be my way to get to Aro, this time for good. Alice had topped me in everything, but I was determined to be a better mother than she was. I would do it. I would fight.


	48. Sebastian

**Hello! Thank you so much for being patient with me. I know it's been a long, slow way, but hopefully I'll put myself together now and really dedicate time to this story. I'm really sorry I've made you wait and wait and wait. It'll all be better now, I promise. I love you all**

**:::::::::::::::**

**Sebastian**

They called him Sebastian, or Aro did, anyway. Not that she cared in any way. In Alice's eyes, the moment the baby was out of her all responsibilities about him were only Aro's. To her, Sebastian wasn't her son. Alice refused to have any contact of any kind with Sebastian. Her refusal to breastfeed him caused us some problems, because no one had thought she would even think about refusing, and so my brother had to run and get some baby formula that he didn't even like.

Yet much as I hated her, I loved what she was doing. That she willingly stepped out of her duties as mother only cleared the way for me. I wanted that boy. Swiftly and effortlessly, Sebastian went directly under my care. Aro wouldn't trust anyone else with his very own son, and having me proved a wonderful asset. Sebastian was wonderful, a precious little baby. I couldn't get enough of him, and though I knew it was very wrong and stupid to allow myself to love him, when I realized what I was feeling it was too late to stop it.

Being Sebastian's nanny gave me exclusive contact with Aro. After all, I had to report how Sebastian was, if he'd slept well, what he had eaten, and how he behaved. Two or three times a day I delivered these reports to the proud new father, and he adored me. Sebastian seemed to like me, too; after all I was the person he spent most of the time with and we had grown very familiar with each other. I lived for those reports, and for Aro's looks of approval

Naturally, Alec was completely against the whole thing. He insisted that I was just causing more damage to myself, and tried every way he could think of to convince me of giving Sebastian up.

"He's not your son, Jane. You can't treat him as if he was."

"Alice hates him. I'm all he has, how could I just leave him on his own? He needs a lot of things, and Aro cannot give him all the time he wishes. He's all alone, and he's just a baby."

"Well, then let someone else take him. There are plenty of girls who would do a great babysitting job with him. It doesn't have to be you. It shouldn't be you."

But I was determined to keep at least this little piece of Aro, and so I held on to him with all the strength I had.

Unfortunately Alice, despite her obvious disdain towards her son, had finally settled as queen after bringing him into the world. Though Aro himself hadn't cared much whether she had a boy or a girl, it was obvious that the guard and everyone in the castle respected her more now that she'd produced a son. To them, she had succeeded in every way a woman could.

And though Alice didn't make a secret of her hatred towards Sebastian, Aro made no move against her. God knew what she was doing to keep him right around her finger, because the Aro I knew, and even the Aro I'd started to know after this girl, would have put her right in her place, wouldn't let his son grow up ignored and hated by his mother. Alice was learning to manipulate Aro, which was wonderful and terrible. Wonderful because finally we'd stop having the eternal battlefield the whole place had become, and Aro would be less irritable. Terrible because only she would hold that power, and obviously she would serve her own interests before anyone else's; what we needed now that she could control him was someone who could control _her_, and so far there was no one. The little girl who wasn't even fifteen years old was quickly becoming a danger to everyone. I decided to put her out of my mind. What was a teenage girl, compared to the bliss I was living at the moment?

I enjoyed very, very happy days with my baby. But when Sebastian was almost one month old everything changed. I picked him up and tried to give him his bottle, but he refused it. He had always been a good eater, so this seemed strange to me. I pressed my hand to his forehead and felt it warmer than usual. I paced with him in my arms for a little while, thinking it might do him good, but when I checked his temperature again it was even hotter.

After another half hour he was worse. I began to be truly scared, and sought every way I could to control his fever, but failed miserably. Sebastian started wailing, and then fell into some kind of stupor that was more terrifying than his cries. I kept listening to his heart, and noticed that it was starting to beat more softly. The fever was worse.

"Don't, don't, Sebastian, please," I begged him in desperation. "Please, darling, please, my love, what's going on? What do you need?"

I tried everything I could think of, but I finally had to accept that I couldn't handle this on my own. With Sebastian in my arms and my heart in my throat I went downstairs to look for Aro.

_Alice's POV_

I couldn't have been happier about giving birth. The kid came out painlessly and fast, and now I was only too glad to be rid of that weight. Aro wanted his child, well, there he had it; my job was done. I didn't even try to hold the boy, and avoided even looking at him. Every glance at him was a reminder of what had happened, of what his father had done to me, and of the ways he could still potentially hurt me. To see him was to live the pain again.

Aro was overjoyed, of course, and for a while too caught in being a father to mess with me. Apparently, he thought I was acting on hormones and post-baby feelings, and that's why he left me alone. It helped to have Jane, too: she was delighted to assume all the responsibility with Sebastian and so I didn't even had to think of how to keep him out of my way.

Aro had already made it very clear that he wanted another child by next year. I was desperate, trying to find a way to prevent that from happening; I was determined never to go through that again. I would never bring another of his children into the world. I'd had Sebastian, and that was it. Maybe in a few more weeks I could try to negotiate with Aro again; now that he had his son in his arms it might be a bit easier to convince him to let me go. Who knew, it might work this time.

And that's what I was planning while I sat in Aro's study. He loved spending time with me, and so he'd usually summon me to keep him company while he worked or read. That night he was engrossed in some paperwork while I sketched at his feet, cuddled up in a bunch of velvety pillows on the rug. Occasionally he would stroke my head, and I had to hold on to the pencil in order not to shake his hand off. It was in that moment that Jane appeared, with Sebastian in her arms and a look of worry in her face.

"Sir…" she began. If she could have been any paler, she certainly would have been. Whatever she was about to say terrified her. "Sir, I think Sebastian is a little sick." Aro's eyes met mine for a moment and we knew we were thinking the same: if Jane was letting this be known, and especially if she said he was "a little" sick, it meant something very serious. Aro took Sebastian from her and sent for Renata, and any other person in the castle that had experience with children. When he spoke, there was the same cold fear in his voice as in Jane's.

"Jane, he's burning. When did this start? Why hadn't you told me?"

I'd never seen her so anguished. "He was fine until a couple of hours ago. I thought the fever would get better, but… I honestly don't know what this could be, I swear I've taken good care of him, I really have."

I felt the need to reassure her, for she had begun to truly panic. "Don't you worry, Jane. We'll figure this out and he'll soon be fine again."

Everyone who had ever been a midwife, nurse, or had ever had anything to do with kids came to the study, but no one could quite point out what Sebastian had. Finally, the child grew so sick and Aro so desperate that he ordered to call a regular paediatrician. He wouldn't take any risks with his son's health.

The doctor arrived, and when I saw his face as he checked Sebastian I understood this was worse than any of us had thought.

"So?" asked Aro anxiously. "What is it? What's happening to my son?"

"I'm afraid the boy is very ill," said the man gravely. "I believe it might be something related to lack of antibodies, but I can't be sure until I have some tests done. For the moment I've given him an injection, but it's not having any effect, and he's too small to try anything else."

"What does that mean? What should we do?"

"Wait, sir, and pray. And… you should be prepared."

"Prepared for what?"

"For…" the doctor sighed. "Do be strong. There is a chance that we might lose him tonight."


End file.
